That,s All Folks

Hiya folks



well the day has come...

my swinging days are over

it,s not for me anymore .. my personal health & well being are more important to me than sex

too clicky & too many idiots liars & backstabbers (you know who you are)


wishing you all the best

Tommy

Very sad news that one of the 'proper' doggers/ swingers or whatever you want to be called is leaving.

We both wish you all the luck in the world in whatever it is you are doing and take care.

Very sorry to see you going

Hey Mr.T, Its Raj here? we met only once and I found you to be a real true gentleman. Im very sorry to hear of your problems and just want to wish you all the best in whatever you may do. But dont just leave like that... do hang around and visit sometimes.
Best wishes to you mate... true gent

Tommy spill the beans, dont suffer in silence

Yeah Tom , if people are assholes then they should be told to be honest mate all the lovely qualities you suggest are quite common in any walk of life, so we shouldnt be surprised if we encounter them in swinging. An asshole with his dick in his hand is still an asshole so dont give up your hobby just cos of them.

Ah! But on this site you cannot "share your troubles".

Assholes are allowed to be assholes and nothing can be done about it. Naming and shaming is not allowed and there are absolutely no checks and balances.

Pity but there you are....things have been deteriorating for a while now.

well yeah assholes will always be assholes Dip, but he could talk about it and chances are alot of people would get some information from it and would support him. He wouldnt have to name anyone, naming and shaming is always more about revenge than it is about actually getting somewhere with a problem.

Disagree with you there.......Assholes love being assholes and once word gets around that a site allows assholes to be largely fireproof then they gather like moths to a flame.

Naming is about prevention, not revenge....how likely would it be to muck someone around (being polite there) if your ID and the details of what you did are going to be plastered all over the site?

Well you sound quite adamant and I dont really feel in the mood to start a row about it so we will agree to disagree - fact is naming an asshole will never 'shame' them - if they were capable of that level of introspection they would apply the judgement themselves. Similarly any kind of 'monitoring' or vetting by concensus is by its very nature open not only to lovely reasonable people like you guys but is also open to assholes as well, and they will inevitably use it for revenge or their own nefarious purposes.The idea has been muted and discussed at length here and one of the things that has always led me to respect the members and decision maker at this forum has been that they have always rejected it for just the reaons I mention.
I think judgement of individuals is best left to individuals or at least private discussion with people whose opinion you trust and respect, after all one persons asshole is another persons ideal anal sex partner.

Peace

As always....I defer to the "management" but judging from pm's and emails sent to us over "issues" on this site in the past, I will never be convinced that the majority view is honored on here. One must always remember that on a pay site, the maximum number of users generates the maximum income and an assholes cash is as good as the next guys.

there are over 900,000 members. The majority is therefore more than 450,000. I think we are in a better position regarding what the members want than you are, don't you think? Are you telling me that over 450,000 members have contacted you? Who set you up as the collater of this information and how were the membership informed of this?
We tend to look at the bigger picture rather than what cannot be more than a handful of PM's you must have received. and if you have received more than that and feel so strongly about it, why haven't you forwarded this on to the management to discuss, rather than bringing it to the forums where it would have little or no effect?

Mal

Sorry Mal
not quite the way it works as there will always be more non voters than voters therefore the winner will be the one with the majority of votes cast
this is really a straw poll but if nothing else this might high light the need for a proper vote or further action
In any event one way or another however big or small the members have spoken and should be properly acknowledged by management/owners and not dismissed in this way

Like I said I didnt wanna start a row. I understand your point of view Dip honestly I do. However the prevailing atmosphere on SH since we first joined many moons (and pre paysite days) ago was always a simple 'cream rises to the top' system. There has always been basic decency and abuse rules which are always enforced (and dont think I havent found myself on the wrong side of them more than once)but the judgement of someones desirability or personal trust worthiness etc has always been the perogative of the members themselves. I was never all that happy by the site becoming commercial and voiced that at the time, but I have been pleasantly surprised since that the new owners appear to have for the most part left the regulation of the site in the hands of those few patient members who have always largely ended up doing a great job (a few notable exceptions but far far in the minority) Mal has jumped to the defense of those unpaid few and I understand that as well, but since I have a feeling that both you guys and Mal are good folks I would say lets all just be happy for what we have in this site and agree that the positives have always outweighed the negatives.

Peace

This is not dismissal, it was acknowledging that if you feel strongly about it, then voice your feelings directly to Admin and they can make that decision based on responses from the membership. At the moment we have a voice of one, namely Dipper, who seems to feel they are talking on behalf of the majority. If they are, then they need to provide this information rather than just say they have the ear of the majority.
I deliberately haven't brought into this discussion about the good or bad of naming and shaming, that to me is a separate discussion. it has been discussed before and deemed not a good idea by those who participated in it. If someone wishes to restart the discussion, please feel free.

Mal

Of course sometimes they dont listen and get a wee bit up emselves

Shall we all just have sex >?

ok - see you in half an hour!

Mal

Pervert!!!!!

Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hehehe if all else fails ..flirt XXXX

Make lubricant not bombs

would it not be possible to bring in some sort of feedback rating system like a very well known auction site. For example, if a guy is genuine, he will get positive feeback score and other members/couples/singles etc will be in a better position to judge people before they reply/make contact whatever. I'm sure such a system must have been suggested at some point in the past but i dont recall seeing such a discussion.

Oh no.... here we go again !!!