Sleep is a luxury that i do not have, it hides just outside me taunting my back. It sits and smiles and waves at my face, teasing and showing the dreams i would have..
Some dreams i know i would love to have come, some dreams without thinking i know i would run... the ones i would like are warm sweet and fun.. the ones where i run, are dark sad and glum...
I wish i could sleep and drift into dark, to be held in my bed by those big huge arms.. they would hold me so close id smile while slept, i know with those arms id never want to wake,.. id be safe in the knowing that while im away those arms would protect me and do me no harm.. Those arms are called love, and thats what love is... safe, sound strong and wrapped round me... id be in my own little heaven.
But i have no such arms to hold me so safe, the dreams i have now they chase and they hate... without you knowing, i cry in my sleep, i know now with woe that you do not love me... i sleep all alone in that big bed of mine, wishing for you to come to my save me from harm.. I dont need you but i do want you so, i feel the confusion like a dog on a bone, I Want love, but love has no name, to me its just out there calling me names.
I see all my friends i know im not bad, they all found arms to hold them through the night, what is it i miss, what do i lack.. that no one can love me to heaven an back.. am i not worthy am i not good.. dont i deserve the love that you have..? Will it be my turn, when will he come.. the one that will love me no matter how sad, will he see me stood all alone, will he hear my heart as it bursts..? Does he exsist this man that i want, or is he a cruel twist of dreams that i have?
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Love is........
19th Jul 2007 - 6:33pm
stars.....
19th Jul 2007 - 6:38pm
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
- Posts:
- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high is where i sit to hide and cry. I sit quite still, im all alone. no sound comes out just hollow moans.
Its seems peaceful here, no pain no fear, its not a life there's nothing here, i want to leave this lonely place, i weep alone its such a waste...
So i stand up.. and dry my tears,i break the chains that hold me here.
Im scared at first i want to run, back to the clouds i know and love, but i stay strong, but man, its hard. I want to stop but know i cant, no sleep tonight not one eye shut until i know im safe and loved.
That time to sleep its here i know, that deep inside myself im known. I dont need love, I want instead the difference is like black and red. To need is fear, it scares and screams, to want is warm, theres no better cheer.
So as i walk into the night, i know this time i will not fight.. there is no rain no tears no sound, but this time its because im proud. The time to stand and fight has gone, no need not now.. im all most done. So as i spin and swirl and sway i thank the stars, they kept me safe..until right now, this moment here ,the moment that i live without fear.
Its seems peaceful here, no pain no fear, its not a life there's nothing here, i want to leave this lonely place, i weep alone its such a waste...
So i stand up.. and dry my tears,i break the chains that hold me here.
Im scared at first i want to run, back to the clouds i know and love, but i stay strong, but man, its hard. I want to stop but know i cant, no sleep tonight not one eye shut until i know im safe and loved.
That time to sleep its here i know, that deep inside myself im known. I dont need love, I want instead the difference is like black and red. To need is fear, it scares and screams, to want is warm, theres no better cheer.
So as i walk into the night, i know this time i will not fight.. there is no rain no tears no sound, but this time its because im proud. The time to stand and fight has gone, no need not now.. im all most done. So as i spin and swirl and sway i thank the stars, they kept me safe..until right now, this moment here ,the moment that i live without fear.
to my dad........
19th Jul 2007 - 6:41pm
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
- Posts:
- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
Christmas is about fun and cheer...
Christmas is about love and beer...
Christmas is for life and light
Christmast is not about strife and fights...
But to me christmas is about loss and fear...
My babies mean the world to me, i miss them more and more each year.. i send them love and smiles and cheer..but from me its fake it hides my tears.. Il leave it there cant say no more, as if i speak there sure to come, thick an fast and down my face.. the tears of loss they sting my cheecks.
I miss my family, dad you rocked.. you were my world but now it sucks... You turned your back and walked away, washed your hands and never came back.. I miss my baby brother too.. by now he will be grown and cool... i wonder what his life holds now? is he handsome, is he proud? Would he pick me from the crowd? I doubt it though i am a ghost, i faded nicely in the shadows, never shouted from the bellows.. love me know me hold me dad, im still the little girl who made you laugh... Im still the child you fought to keep. I should shout and jump and wave.. but the shadows will stay covering me until my grave.
But all said and done i am not her.. the girl who used to hide, now il stand up for myself and dad, man you would be proud... im strong inside i still have tears, but instead of poison the now run clear.. im not the child who used to be.. now..my father i am me.
To my dad... who i love till my heart will burst. But sometimes love just isnt enough.
Christmas is about love and beer...
Christmas is for life and light
Christmast is not about strife and fights...
But to me christmas is about loss and fear...
My babies mean the world to me, i miss them more and more each year.. i send them love and smiles and cheer..but from me its fake it hides my tears.. Il leave it there cant say no more, as if i speak there sure to come, thick an fast and down my face.. the tears of loss they sting my cheecks.
I miss my family, dad you rocked.. you were my world but now it sucks... You turned your back and walked away, washed your hands and never came back.. I miss my baby brother too.. by now he will be grown and cool... i wonder what his life holds now? is he handsome, is he proud? Would he pick me from the crowd? I doubt it though i am a ghost, i faded nicely in the shadows, never shouted from the bellows.. love me know me hold me dad, im still the little girl who made you laugh... Im still the child you fought to keep. I should shout and jump and wave.. but the shadows will stay covering me until my grave.
But all said and done i am not her.. the girl who used to hide, now il stand up for myself and dad, man you would be proud... im strong inside i still have tears, but instead of poison the now run clear.. im not the child who used to be.. now..my father i am me.
To my dad... who i love till my heart will burst. But sometimes love just isnt enough.
live life.........
19th Jul 2007 - 10:28pm
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
- Posts:
- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
I wonder where il be, i wonder who il see.. will i find peace, free of pain? or will i find space, just empty and vain...
Will my mum be there to meet me and stare? Will she forgive me for never being there...
Will i be held by relatives past? Will they embrace me and welcome me back?
Will i miss home, and all that is there? or will i walk forward never look back?
Ive been here before i know that is true.. im sure i was here when i became blue.. i didnt stay long just had a look round, as earth was pulling and i crashed to the ground..
The memories are fuzzy, hazy but true.. i saw the light and wanted to go through, at that time i felt cheated and sulked, i wanted the warmth i wanted the sun. But then i lived and saw different lights, these lights were of love and laughter and fun, but these are fading, there burning out slow, the next time i visit it will be a forgone, the next time i go i wont come back as next time i visit there will be no pull to come back..
Death is a game ive played before, last time i won and now theres a score. one nil to me i lived an yeharrr. but now death is pissed and wants me nailed to the floor..i feel its breath all down my neck, this time is cheeky, its sly, underhand.. Bring it on i say, do your worst i beat you once i can beat you some more!
Will my mum be there to meet me and stare? Will she forgive me for never being there...
Will i be held by relatives past? Will they embrace me and welcome me back?
Will i miss home, and all that is there? or will i walk forward never look back?
Ive been here before i know that is true.. im sure i was here when i became blue.. i didnt stay long just had a look round, as earth was pulling and i crashed to the ground..
The memories are fuzzy, hazy but true.. i saw the light and wanted to go through, at that time i felt cheated and sulked, i wanted the warmth i wanted the sun. But then i lived and saw different lights, these lights were of love and laughter and fun, but these are fading, there burning out slow, the next time i visit it will be a forgone, the next time i go i wont come back as next time i visit there will be no pull to come back..
Death is a game ive played before, last time i won and now theres a score. one nil to me i lived an yeharrr. but now death is pissed and wants me nailed to the floor..i feel its breath all down my neck, this time is cheeky, its sly, underhand.. Bring it on i say, do your worst i beat you once i can beat you some more!
be nice
19th Jul 2007 - 10:37pm
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
- Posts:
- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
What do i see.. when i look deep within me..., am i there, under that stare?
Who do you see when you look deep within me.... Do you see me or a version of me?
When will i be the girl that i see? the girl with the smile, and the girl who would never suffer a liar...?
Oh what to do what to become, il tell myself that im worthy of fun...
So il not look to deep, not look to far, for fear of knock back is holding be back..
So when you see me, wave to my smile, hold up your hand and stop for a while, cos ive been invisible for so very long.. and smile a nod is worth more than a snog.. i try to be nice, il try not to snipe, il open my eyes and hold you so close... all i ask in return is that you dont hurt me to ice.
Who do you see when you look deep within me.... Do you see me or a version of me?
When will i be the girl that i see? the girl with the smile, and the girl who would never suffer a liar...?
Oh what to do what to become, il tell myself that im worthy of fun...
So il not look to deep, not look to far, for fear of knock back is holding be back..
So when you see me, wave to my smile, hold up your hand and stop for a while, cos ive been invisible for so very long.. and smile a nod is worth more than a snog.. i try to be nice, il try not to snipe, il open my eyes and hold you so close... all i ask in return is that you dont hurt me to ice.
urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
love is.....
5th Aug 2007 - 6:32am
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
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- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
Love is..... love is .... love is many things to many people but to some its more that most, to some it will never be but to most its something that was lost, love is a smile in a crowded room, love is a sigh that no one heard.. love is the note in the sandwich bag, love is the shirt, ironed ready to hang, love is the meal made for her man, love is the hug came with out asking,
love is the paper brought up to the bed, love is the lie in she never gets to have.love is a tear that falls with no sound, love is the covers that are kicked to the ground, love is silence without any fear, love is kindness without a cruel sneer, love is a sound that reminds you of him, love is a night off with the boys, love is a night in with out chores,
love is the flower left on the pillow, love is the man who smiles when you bellow, love is a trick to make you feel safe, love brings its shit and lays down in bed, love turns the sky from blue to dark red, love makes you angry till your loosing your head,
love is a dream and thats where it will stay, cos love had me once and never again......
love is the paper brought up to the bed, love is the lie in she never gets to have.love is a tear that falls with no sound, love is the covers that are kicked to the ground, love is silence without any fear, love is kindness without a cruel sneer, love is a sound that reminds you of him, love is a night off with the boys, love is a night in with out chores,
love is the flower left on the pillow, love is the man who smiles when you bellow, love is a trick to make you feel safe, love brings its shit and lays down in bed, love turns the sky from blue to dark red, love makes you angry till your loosing your head,
love is a dream and thats where it will stay, cos love had me once and never again......
thankyou
5th Aug 2007 - 7:55am
These are great Furby. 'Love is' made me cry. Hope you'll be writing more 
gross!!! 
This is actually a song.
But i like it and its a close to poetry as i get.
ANGEL.
Angel-put sad wings around me now
protect me from this world of sin
so that we can rise again
Angel-we can find our way somehow
escaping from the world we are in
to a place where we began
and i know we'll find
a better place and peace of mind
just tell me that its all you want - for you and me
angel wont you set me free
angel remember how we'd chase the sun
then reaching for the stars at night
as our lives had just begun
when i close my eyes i hear your velvet wings and cry
i'm waiting here with open arms - oh cant you see
angel shine your light on me
Oh angel will we meet once more - i'll pray
when all my sins are washed away
hold me inside your wings and stay
Angel take me far away
put sad wings around me now
angel take me far away
put sad wings around me now
so that we can rise again.
But i like it and its a close to poetry as i get.
ANGEL.
Angel-put sad wings around me now
protect me from this world of sin
so that we can rise again
Angel-we can find our way somehow
escaping from the world we are in
to a place where we began
and i know we'll find
a better place and peace of mind
just tell me that its all you want - for you and me
angel wont you set me free
angel remember how we'd chase the sun
then reaching for the stars at night
as our lives had just begun
when i close my eyes i hear your velvet wings and cry
i'm waiting here with open arms - oh cant you see
angel shine your light on me
Oh angel will we meet once more - i'll pray
when all my sins are washed away
hold me inside your wings and stay
Angel take me far away
put sad wings around me now
angel take me far away
put sad wings around me now
so that we can rise again.
Re: thankyou
6th Aug 2007 - 1:42pm
FurbyHug wrote:
thankyou... i didnt think anyone really read them... lol..i appreciate the kindness....
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Ohhh you'd be surprised anais wrote:
Really lovely Furby Smile:
Really lovely Furby
Smile:
thankyou... i didnt think anyone really read them... lol..i appreciate the kindness....
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Keep them coming, very interesting and lovely... I can definately relate to some of them!
faithless.....
7th Aug 2007 - 7:56pm
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
- Posts:
- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
Why do you look right into my eyes.. and not see the pain thats hidden inside?
How do you talk to me day in day out.. and not feel the ice cold that creeps through my heart?
When will you open your eyes and behold.. that this little one has never been told?
Shes never been held, or loved or put up high, shes never been sure she wont be put aside, shes never been made to feel like a queen, shes never been stared at until she is seen....
This little one sits and holds out her arms, she reaches up to you to open your heart, she pleads with her eyes, and says not a word, hoping and praying her silence is heard...
One day she feels that this will be heard, that one day her world will become thawed, its cold in this cave, of silence and dark.. the ice drips drips down, right into her heart..
Do Good things really happen for good people.. cos im losing faith.[/b]
Just for a laugh I'll post one I wrote years ago...
Night
Silent, shine her sapphire eyes.
A tiny twinkle teasing there
Inviting evening's cool embrace
Around her soft, white skin. Her hair
An auburn glow as moon caresses
Soft and silken. Subtle senses
Lost within her lifelong tresses
Til passion's fire relents, and hence
I lay entwined in arms of velvet,
Tasting scents on night's sweet breeze.
Inhaling deep of ardour's smell, yet
Lost in her I aim to please
Then miss a little just to tease
A torture I perform with ease
As now with grinding hips we meet
To make our one brief night complete
With eyes of fire that sear the soul
Her movement now beyond control
Towards her inner goal she strives
As both our bodies come alive.
And then, so suddenly we cease,
Our essence joined in shared release.
And as the stars above us shine
We start again. We have the time.
Night
Silent, shine her sapphire eyes.
A tiny twinkle teasing there
Inviting evening's cool embrace
Around her soft, white skin. Her hair
An auburn glow as moon caresses
Soft and silken. Subtle senses
Lost within her lifelong tresses
Til passion's fire relents, and hence
I lay entwined in arms of velvet,
Tasting scents on night's sweet breeze.
Inhaling deep of ardour's smell, yet
Lost in her I aim to please
Then miss a little just to tease
A torture I perform with ease
As now with grinding hips we meet
To make our one brief night complete
With eyes of fire that sear the soul
Her movement now beyond control
Towards her inner goal she strives
As both our bodies come alive.
And then, so suddenly we cease,
Our essence joined in shared release.
And as the stars above us shine
We start again. We have the time.
rose.....
10th Aug 2007 - 9:30am
someone...
10th Aug 2007 - 9:34am
FurbyHugI've got chair sores- Joined:
- 17 May 2007
- Posts:
- 490
- Location:
- Somewhere over the
rainbow..way up
high....
Someone somewhere is thinking of you..
So when life gets you down and starts making you blue..
Look in your your heart and remember its true...
That someone somewhere gives a shit about you ...
jaymarGodlike- Joined:
- 1 Oct 2005
- Posts:
- 5686
- Location:
- Somewhere between
here and orgasmic
heaven....
There are two days in every week about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.
One of these days is Yesterday with all its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains.
Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back Yesterday.
We cannot undo a single act we performed; we cannot erase a single word we said. Yesterday is gone forever.
The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow
with all its possible adversities, its burdens,
its large promise and its poor performance;
Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.
Tomorrow's sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in Tomorrow, for it is yet to be born.
This leaves only one day, Today. Any person can fight the battle of just one day. It is when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternities Yesterday and Tomorrow that we break down.
It is not the experience of Today that drives a person mad, it is the remorse or bitterness of something which happened Yesterday and the dread of what Tomorrow may bring.
Let us, therefore, Live but one day at a time.
One of these days is Yesterday with all its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains.
Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back Yesterday.
We cannot undo a single act we performed; we cannot erase a single word we said. Yesterday is gone forever.
The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow
with all its possible adversities, its burdens,
its large promise and its poor performance;
Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.
Tomorrow's sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in Tomorrow, for it is yet to be born.
This leaves only one day, Today. Any person can fight the battle of just one day. It is when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternities Yesterday and Tomorrow that we break down.
It is not the experience of Today that drives a person mad, it is the remorse or bitterness of something which happened Yesterday and the dread of what Tomorrow may bring.
Let us, therefore, Live but one day at a time.
