Sh Poetry Corner

This one is for anyone who has ever been in a lonely place, I wrote this before I met Asha, its not exactly a poem, but its close enough..

from Jerichos Walls Are Falling:

Love. I always thought I would have found it by now. I am not just talking about an emotion shared between two people. I mean something greater, an unparalleled connection, something so pure, something so soulful; something that transcends any other experience that you ever shared with anyone in your life.

I know it is hard to find but I just thought I would have reached with someone, in that way. Now, now the road ahead is so uncertain and I have been touched by the dark and it wants to keep me there, it doesn’t want to let go, it surrounds me, isolates me and then it try’s to suffocate me.

But the more it try’s to do that, the stronger I must become, with each obstacle it throws into my path it will cover me with a coat of new resilience. I cannot let it turn my fears into bitterness, my failures into depression, my hopes and dreams must live on, as they always have and I will take this evil and I will turn it around, against itself because what does not kill me will make me stronger and on the days when I can no longer walk, those will be the days when I learn to fly and if that love does not seek me out in this lifetime then I shall find it in the next when all those who have gone before us will be re-united with their soul mates and we will stand together so pure of heart that our strength will never die.

And those who looked down upon us, who tried to isolate us, whose contempt for us was always made so clear, I will pity them, for such a love they could never have, for they were the ones who were consumed by their own fears and ignorance and as we rise up they will look up towards us but we, we will no longer see them as they just fade away.

Then our hearts will be triumphant when the angels hold our hands and fly with us through this life, or the next.

By Alex

A special festive one.......


Another year drips away,
Saying same,same

New year beer pissed away,
Saying same,same

Christ child born killed resurrected,
Saying same,same,

All the changes drift away,
Saying same,same

All chances slip away,
saying shame,shame

the one i loved, messaged me...
What to feel, what to think...
He hurt me bad, said he had never loved..
But now he says his head was mud...

Can a person change there mind...
and feel now something they hid inside?
if he left me cos of fear..
wont that still be there not clear..?

He was the one who broke down my walls..
he was the one, who knocked down my inner doors..
he was the one i gave in to ...
he was the one who left me in fear..

fear that il never love again
fear that il never trust again
fear that il never be good..
good enough to be loved so true...

god its hard i want him so..
but can i trust a mans whos leaving blow..
left me reeling for months on end
fearing my heart would never mend...

Ive turned to ice since that day..
when i found out from the words he said...
that he didnt want me, i was to nice..
he loved his ex and was going back
thanks for loving me, he said, but i cant love back cos its not you i feel., the cliche lines came thick an fast, its not you its me im dark, im black inside, im not good for you, wrong time wrong place, who ever knew.., it could of been good... he ran away, never explained, left me feeling lost and drained, he was the man who finally, got in my head an set me free... let me be the me who feels... let me open my eyes an see.. that love was there, even for me... just as i relaxed and sighed, and breathed, and let down my walls so he could come in, he waited till i felt finally free, then left and ran with tail between legs.....

what do i do , how do i feel.. do i trust this man i still feel... iknow inside i never stopped, hoping and wishing he'd find himself lost, lost without me in his life, wishing and wanting him to walk back.. to tell me the words i loved to hear, furby baby i love you ive missed you oh dear...

but then i get strong and wipe away tears, and shout... to the mirror your better!! no Fear!!!.. your worth more than hand me downs, if he wanted you then he wouldnt need to crawl back, cos he wouldnt of left and walked away not looking back, he would of looked at you and chose to stay, so furby baby hold up your head.. you might be ice queen but at least you not scared. So what if you dont ever fall deep again, who needs love it just shits in your bed!!!!

Each grain taken up in tumultuous water.
Carried by River Life.
Each grain of sand buffeted by River Life.
Fast runs River Life, each grain carried.

River Life rolls on, sedate she becomes.
Now each grain settles to bottom.
Now each grain commands River Life.
Which is the river, the water or the banks that contain it?

The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed 'round the room and I cherished the sight;
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.

Outside the snow fell....a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight;
The sparkling lights on the tree, I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.

My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep;
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem.
So I slumbered in peace, then I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it came to my ear;
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know,
Then the sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.

My soul gave a tremble. I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near;
Standing out there alone in the cold of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.

A soldier, I reckoned, some eighteen years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled there in the cold;
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, my wife, and my child.

"What are you doing?" I asked without fear,
"Come in this moment! It's freezing out here;
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on this cold Christmas Eve!"

For barely a moment, I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold, and the snow in a drift;
To the windows that danced with a warm fire's light,
Then he sighed, and he said, "It's really all right."

"I'm out here by choice. I'm here all the time,
It's my duty to stand at the front of the line;
No one has to ask me, or beg, or implore,
I'm proud to stand here like my father before."

"My grandpa at Pearl, on a day in December,
Is a memory my grandma will always remember;
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of 'Nam,
And now it's my turn, and so, here I am.

I've not seen my family in more than a while,
But my parents send pictures. They're great for a smile."
Then he bent down and carefully pulled from his bag,
The Red, White, and Blue. An American flag.

"I can live through the cold, and this being alone,
Away from my family, my house, and my home;
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole, with little to eat.

I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life for my buddy.....my brother;
Who stand here with me against any and all,
To insure for all time that this flag does not fall.

So go back inside," he said, "harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."
"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
Give you some money? Prepare you a feast?

It seems all too little for all that you do,
Being away from your home and your family too."
Then his eyes welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget;

To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone;
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, wither standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled,
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you, as you mattered to us."

Well.. ive made it, it is here..
christmas day an not one tear..
i got nice gifts, from all my friends..
who now i call family not just friends..

they care about me and i should see..
that to them without me there lives would lack cheer..
i read a card inside it said..

'dearest furby, we love you so..without your smile id be full of woe, dont despair, hold on tight, your world will soon be bright.. i love you darling, you are ok.. furby rules and dont you choke...'

then under it said.. what you think i tried a poem.. just for you amanda love you to your bones!!

i cried a tear.. i have to say, to feel so loved by them that arent kin..

but who is kin, who is blood.. 8yrs ive waited to be fully loved,.. and not one word, no single card, not even an email to say hi.. so when i think i have no one.. i look at the card an the lovely poem.. and think im blessed.. no matter what..it might not be normal, it might not be mum.. but im loved non the less and for that im touched..

furby outXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx

(to the woman i love)

this is insanity
to be so close
yet a promise so binding
an ever climbing wall
waiting to be overcome

an amazing journey
the sleepless nights
the crushing heart-break
admission of love
the distance
and with every moment gone
the longing grows stronger

our first conversation
a cheeky argument you say
the first impressions
forever binding
never ending

it's a torment
i'm a torment you say
whatever it is
every precious moment together
no regrets
love hurts, as they say
we concur

overcome it will be
a decade nearing
a decade more i shall bear if be
this journey shall unfold

the beach
the moonlight
just as we talked all these years
in each other's arms
listening to the crashing waves
our home
peace at last
sleep at last
together at last

Somewhere somewhere over the rainbow
way up high is where you'l find me
looking, waiting, wishing to be
with someone somewhere looking outfor me

Is the one i want seeing me..?
does he stay back where i cant see?
is he hiding for fear of his heart?
does he want me but scared to come forth

i promise nothing except not to hurt
i promise il hold your heart,it wont get burnt
i promise i will never cause you harm
i promise il open up with my heart..

if you want me and see me but cant say hello
them message me text me just so i know
that im not being a twat here all alone
and that you like me back, its got to be known.

This poem was sent to me from someone very close and he has allowed me to share it with the forum.....


How pure my life, my dreams yearn peace, How cold this chamber,my need for realese.Questions abound, yet so few answers, i look all around, the picture is faceless. the need to express, what i must redress. tell me my worth, on this beautiful earth. the pain grows within, where do i begin. compassion i must give, please open this lid. lost souls living dead, look into my head. how sorry i am, i come to bare. exploration of my life, far too many regrets, oh for this chance, my arms held wide, to unburden my soul, stand at my side, your love so precious, there is no price, the pain we feel, it wont happen twice, night darkness around me, sleep evades me again, no one to listen, god feel this pain, i must pull through, tomorrow begins, to those who slept, the birds will sing, how pure my life?, lets see what this day brings xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Life like this;
the dark play,
Ghost filled
and bloody,
returns ever
to truth denied.

blah blah blah blah

pain.. blah blah blah

shame ... blah blah blah

over come... blah blah blah..

total loss.

I hear the sound of the birds sing, i wonder if i stand still, will the birds still sing for me, i hope they do i want bring, the light i feel for the world to see.. the fear the pound the growing sound, the wonder the light from the top to the ground.. ! the light its there i feel its warmth, shineing on me i feel so proud, i see you , i feel you i want you now, lightness an brightness and wonderment found.. burning churning, turning me now, spining me throwing cartwheeling abound.. ! nothing is something something is there.. feel it, own it.. walk to the sound.. im calling you begging you needing you now.. come to me find me im here to be found..

Night Jar sings,
bright as day.
Dark cloud hover,
cold as night.

Lover smiles,
warms the heart.
Love purchased,
cold despair.

Sleep it comes now thick an fast, i dont need to hold it back, my time for tears has run its course i glady close my eyes to wander... no longer scared of the night sky , no longer wanted to hide an cry ..... im standing all on my own, and loving the way i stand up tall... i knew one day the black would clear, that sooner or later id loose the fear.. i doubted for so long that cheer.. would never fill my heart but dear!! its fine im good im truly cool, i happy for the very first time! whooooooooop woooooo hear me shout!! furbys life is back on track!!!

from truth and strength,
let all things flow
to joy, and know
only in light
will anything grow.

Here I sit
to shy to smile
to shy to speak
but I listen while you tell
for now this world I know.

Cherry buds full of promise.
Cherry blossom so beautiful.
Cherry blossom you nourish my sole.
Cherry blossom falls, I remember you,
but cherry fruit you feed my body.

Love is just a tool to the heart
a tool for sex.

Sex it just a tool to the heart
a tool for love.

but when each tool is play and each objective achieved...the heart sings.

alas when each tool fails the heartache.