Lost wrote:
Shamelessly taken from somewhere on the interweb
Frigging in the Rigging
'Twas on the good ship Venus,
By Christ you should have seen us--
The figurehead was a whore in bed
And the mast a throbbing penis.
Chorus:
Frigging in the rigging, frigging in the rigging,
Frigging in the rigging, there was fuck-all else to do.
The captain of that lugger,
He was a dirty bugger.
He wasn't fit to shovel shit
From one place to another.
The bosun's name was Carter,
A very musical farter.
He could fart anything from "God Save the King"
To Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata."
The captain's name was Morgan;
By Christ he was a gorgon,
And every day sweet tunes he'd play
On his reproductive organ.
The captain's wife was Charlotte;
She was a natural harlot.
All through the night her thighs shone white,
By morning they were scarlet.
The cook's name was O'Malley;
He didn't dilly-dally.
He shot his bolt with such a jolt
It whitewashed half the galley.
The first mate's name was Andy;
By Christ he had a dandy,
'Til they crushed his cock with broken rock
For coming in the brandy.
The captain's daughter Mabel,
Lay on the wardroom table,
And all the crew would come and screw
As oft as they were able.
The captain's other daughter
Fell in the deep sea water.
Delighted squeals revealed the eels
Had found her sexual quarter.
The engineer was Cooper;
By Christ he was a trooper.
He jerked and jerked until he worked
Himself into a stupor.
The coxswain's name was Hopper;
By Christ he had a whopper--
Twice 'round the deck, once 'round his neck,
Then up his ass for a stopper.
The ship's dog's name was Rover;
The whole crew turned him over.
They ground and ground that faithful hound
From Shanghai back to Dover.
The ship's cat's name was Kitty;
Her hole was black and shitty.
But shit or not, she had a twat,
And the Captain knew no pity.
'Twas in the Adriatic,
Where the water's almost static,
That the rise and fall of ass and ball
Was almost automatic.
On the trip to Buenos Aires,
We buggered all the fairies.
We got the syph at Tenerife,
And the clap in the Canaries.
And when we reached our station,
And to our great elation
The ship was sunk in a sea of spunk
And Lost, I'm hijacking... Great stuff this - and kinda makes me smile a little and think of the Winchy one!

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