Written by Juicyfruit_jf

Fact
30 Mar 2012


Can't get enough of old men and am glad to say I've had my fair share. Apart from my first boyfriend, the only relationships I've had since are with old men and sadly, they've spoilt me for anyone my own age. So much so that now I can't even think about ever being with anyone under 60. I find myself looking at old men in the street and getting horny just thinking about sitting on their knee. Of course I would never approach any of them - with my sort of luck I'd be arrested as some kind of deviant nutcase.

One day last summer (before my old man and me went our separate ways) he had teed up a group of his crusty old boys to come round for a barbeque. Where Rob found them I'll never know. I was to be their waitress for the afternoon - wink, wink. He hadn't told them there would be fun on the side instead of salad. I was so excited at the thought of what he had planned.

I dressed in my most drab, dull clothing which Rob had bought especially for the occasion. All sackcloth and shapeless grey. My hair was in my usual long blonde braids and I wore fake glasses just to get into character - I love dressing up and playing a part. The group of five guests started arriving and I met them at the door, avoiding eye contact and looking shy. Inside though, my whole body was quivering with expectation. With each new arrival I was secretly checking them out and getting wetter by the second.

As the afternoon rolled on, and meat was cooked on the outside burner, I had made sure their drinks were always topped up and no-one had an empty plate. Then it happened. One of the guys was "accidentally bumped" from behind and he spilt his beer all down my dress.

I 'apologised' for being in the way of the spillage and offered to replace the drink but Rob said, "That's not good enough. You can't serve us in those ruined clothes."

I said, "I'm terribly sorry. I'll go change immediately."

Everyone went quiet. I'd been the unseen player up until now and here was the host speaking a bit harshly. I could tell the men were a bit taken aback by what was going on.

"No, you can continue serving us. My friend here needs another drink but a ruined dress is innappropriate. Strip out of it now."

"Yes Sir. Very good Sir," I said with downcast eyes. Ha ha ha I was so excited.

I slowly, 'nervously' unbuttoned my grey cardigan. Then started undoing the buttons on my shapeless dress. I dropped both onto the grass at my feet and stood there in my white cotton panties and nothing else, exposed to the shocked eyes of five old men and Rob. "Take those hideous knickers off too. And the glasses. You obviously can't see in them or you wouldn't have spilled the beer."

"Yes Sir."

"Now clumsy girl, make it up to my friend."

With that, I turned to the old man and said, "Would you like me to kiss you better, Sir?"

Well I reckon he just about creamed his pants right then and there. I wrapped my arms around him and he stood there with his arms out not knowing what to do or which way to look. Then Rob said, "I can see you've shocked my friends with your inept serving skills; you'd better make it up to them too." And then he smiled and they realised it was all part of the plan and they started laughing. Once the tension was eased, they all just went for it.

I soon had wrinkled hands all over me and in me and on me and I was a panting, writhing mess. Some of the guys had their old fellas out and started rubbing themselves on me. I didn't know who to satisfy first. It was THE best day I'd had for a long time. What a bloody brilliant afternoon. I used to love Rob's Super Saturday Specials. He always managed to come up with something wonderful and new. I miss him.


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