Why do we feel like outsiders coming into a gentlemans club? We have been members for well over a year now and regulars in the chatrooms however no one talks in them, they all talk to each other (a select few who know each other talk to each othr). We say hello try to make conversation yet no one talks to us, is it just us or is anyone else finding this? Its annoying and frustrating, we are starting to feel like not bothering.
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People dont chat!!!!!
Quote by Marya_Northeast
It's sometimes hard to join in with conversations when people seem to know each other, I can appreciate that. BUT we all have to start somewhere and the rest of us managed it so maybe you need to try a bit harder or try a different room?
I don't think we should try any harder we have tried very hard and have got into conversations with a few people, but it seems most people on here are not genuinly looking to meet more just perform on cam and chat about nothing connected to swinging heaven. I know this is the case because of a couple of friends we have made on here who we also meet up with so i know its not just us. People just have conversations with people they know and have tried many rooms. Its very frustrating as so so many people on here are very unfriendly and dont look kindly upon people who arent in "their group".
Try the Jacuzzie, server two. The South Wales room, server two. The Northeast Room (I think this one is server 3) just to name a few.
Also when you start a conversation say you are finding it hard to chat and people will be sympathetic and take you under their wing. Failing that find a chat op and go and hold their hand in a room for 10 minutes.
Love
Fire xx
Also when you start a conversation say you are finding it hard to chat and people will be sympathetic and take you under their wing. Failing that find a chat op and go and hold their hand in a room for 10 minutes.
Love
Fire xx
Quote by lastrolo
it seems most people on here are not genuinly looking to meet more just perform on cam and chat about nothing connected to swinging heaven.
If I could just say that if people want to use the chat rooms to cam and nothing more that's up to them. But anyway.
Sorry you feel out of it in the rooms. Yes, they can become something like local pubs - communities where everyone knows each other and their business. As a Mids room regular we often get told off for this. Many of us will make an effort to say hi and make people feel welcome. What I would say in our defence is it's not so much ignoring others just there's so many you do know, the chat moves so fast and you tend to hone in on the one colour of type and miss the rest.
When I started I just did the general "how is everyone" thing, latched onto the people who answered and got to know them from there. But do stick with it. I have made some wonderful friends in the chat rooms who have seen me through some really tough times this year and I wouldn't be without them!
You seem to be saying two different things. People don't chat and people don't want to arrange a meet. If you're going in to a room and saying, 'Hello, who wants to meet now?, you wont get much of a conversation.
As Fire says, try the S Wales room if you're looking for somewhere friendly and I'm sure there are other friendly rooms on here too.
H.x
As Fire says, try the S Wales room if you're looking for somewhere friendly and I'm sure there are other friendly rooms on here too.
H.x
Sex God
Quote by lastrolo
It's sometimes hard to join in with conversations when people seem to know each other, I can appreciate that. BUT we all have to start somewhere and the rest of us managed it so maybe you need to try a bit harder or try a different room?
I don't think we should try any harder we have tried very hard and have got into conversations with a few people, but it seems most people on here are not genuinly looking to meet more just perform on cam and chat about nothing connected to swinging heaven. quote]do you have to go into a chat room just to look for a meet,we dont meet many people thru the week but are into chatrooms most nights just for the crack but,we didnt nar anyone when we first went into them and now nar loads all over the uk. if people want to play on cam thats there kick e.t.t.o(each to there own ) if in a chat room does the convo have to be anything to do with swing hev? or is it you just go into a chatroom looking for a meet if so theres also adds and the forums ,end of the day people try different things to get to what they want.
No I think you are misunderstanding what we are saying. Firstly yes you are right people can cam etc its each to their own and we too have done it but I got really wound up the other day when someone in one of the rooms said that "couples we all timewasters" so I messaged saying we werent and got ignored totally and the convo carried on around so another example of trying to make convo. No we don't go into the rooms and say "does anyone want to meet" its an observation from talking to a very few people.
Thanks for the invitation to chat in the welsh room and the mids rooms, but that is well out of our area and we joined swinging heavn with the view to meet genuine people unfortunately for us those rooms are much too far away.
Like I said in my first post on this matter we arent the only ones to think this is the case so I know its not just us.
Thanks for the invitation to chat in the welsh room and the mids rooms, but that is well out of our area and we joined swinging heavn with the view to meet genuine people unfortunately for us those rooms are much too far away.
Like I said in my first post on this matter we arent the only ones to think this is the case so I know its not just us.
Quote by lastrolo
Thanks for the invitation to chat in the welsh room and the mids rooms, but that is well out of our area and we joined swinging heavn with the view to meet genuine people unfortunately for us those rooms are much too far away.
Its just a thought, you might find it too far to travel but you never know if other people might be willing to travel far to meet you or you could meet in the middle
Sex God
Quote by lastrolo
Due to commitments in essex we arent willing to travel so only want to stick to local areas, yes this might restrict us but with so many members on SH we thought it would be fairly easy to find local GENUINE people.
And who's to say that the people in chat aren't genuine? Just because they don't talk to you, doesn't mean that they aren't genuine
No I didnt say they werent genuine, why is everyone so eager to get on their high horse when someone exprsses an opinion. Its common knowledge that a high number of people on SH are timewasters and not genuine. IS it one rule for the regulars on here to call all couples ungenuine like someone did yesterday again and different rules for people who dont go in the chat rooms every day religiously like us? Once again I wasnt saying everyone on here was un genuine but a high number arent.
Sex God
Quote by lastrolo
No I didnt say they werent genuine, why is everyone so eager to get on their high horse when someone exprsses an opinion. Its common knowledge that a high number of people on SH are timewasters and not genuine. IS it one rule for the regulars on here to call all couples ungenuine like someone did yesterday again and different rules for people who dont go in the chat rooms every day religiously like us? Once again I wasnt saying everyone on here was un genuine but a high number arent.
Obviously it isn't as easy as you thought, but you've said you aren't prepared to try any harder so why should other people bother? People talk to people they know, whether they use the rooms 'religiously' or not. It's your call - but I'd say that generally, you get out what you put in.
We have spent many hours on SH trying to talk to people. We have made a couple of friends from here who we have met with and they also like us have been members for some time. We have put the time in and now feel we cant be bothered with the timewasters on here and other internet sites. Maybe it shouild all be renamed as timewasting heaven. This is just our view and a couple of other peoples views from here.
Samantha
Samantha
Sex God
Quote by lastrolo
We have spent many hours on SH trying to talk to people. We have made a couple of friends from here who we have met with and they also like us have been members for some time. We have put the time in and now feel we cant be bothered with the timewasters on here and other internet sites. Maybe it shouild all be renamed as timewasting heaven. This is just our view and a couple of other peoples views from here.
Samantha
You and a couple of others? That many? Gosh.
Right so you tell me the stats add up simple bit of maths here. There are 816,878 members we have been members for 2 years 3 months over that time we have spent many many hours in the chatrooms, many many hours on the forums and arranged to meet very few people, 99.9% of which were timewasters. Now your trying to tell me that of people on here are genuine, so if thats the case then the percentages dont add up with that many members to 2 years 3 months membership what are the odds of so many timewasters if the site not just this one isnt full of them????
also just noticed on the thread below this one someone else having the same complaint quoted below and yet again someone else being made to look like they are in the wrong by regs on SH.
from Post subject: Frustration on allocation…
Posted: Thu Jan 3, 2008 2:51 pm
We have only been members for a matter on months and are already becoming increasing frustrated with the amount of fake people on this site. We see a profile from a "couple" from our town that is obviously a very lonely bored single male acting up. This guy was trying to pass off pictures of a Big Brother contestant as his Mrs and now this has changed to a file photo we have seen in many of places. I raised my concerns with SH but NOTHING has been done. I guess as long as SH collect there membership fee's they really don’t care what goes on in this place.
We have visited clubs and discussed SH with many people who are seemingly hitting the same problems as us. Everybody seems of the same opinion that when you REALLY break it down it’s a split of approx 90% single men with the other split between couples and woman. What makes it worse is that out of all these men about half of them will run a mile or never turn up should you arrange something.
Our suggestion to this place is a feedback scoring system. If you were let down like we have been you should be able to leave feedback suggesting so. If you have a meeting with these people and they are who they say they are and they are genuine you should be able to say so with the same going for cam fun. I believe that just the deterrent of this would be a great positive step for SH although I am sure memberships and fees would drop so I guess we will never see this happen!!!
from Post subject: Frustration on allocation…
Posted: Thu Jan 3, 2008 2:51 pm
We have only been members for a matter on months and are already becoming increasing frustrated with the amount of fake people on this site. We see a profile from a "couple" from our town that is obviously a very lonely bored single male acting up. This guy was trying to pass off pictures of a Big Brother contestant as his Mrs and now this has changed to a file photo we have seen in many of places. I raised my concerns with SH but NOTHING has been done. I guess as long as SH collect there membership fee's they really don’t care what goes on in this place.
We have visited clubs and discussed SH with many people who are seemingly hitting the same problems as us. Everybody seems of the same opinion that when you REALLY break it down it’s a split of approx 90% single men with the other split between couples and woman. What makes it worse is that out of all these men about half of them will run a mile or never turn up should you arrange something.
Our suggestion to this place is a feedback scoring system. If you were let down like we have been you should be able to leave feedback suggesting so. If you have a meeting with these people and they are who they say they are and they are genuine you should be able to say so with the same going for cam fun. I believe that just the deterrent of this would be a great positive step for SH although I am sure memberships and fees would drop so I guess we will never see this happen!!!
Sex God
Quote by lastrolo
Right so you tell me the stats add up simple bit of maths here. There are 816,878 members we have been members for 2 years 3 months over that time we have spent many many hours in the chatrooms, many many hours on the forums and arranged to meet very few people, 99.9% of which were timewasters. Now your trying to tell me that of people on here are genuine, so if thats the case then the percentages dont add up with that many members to 2 years 3 months membership what are the odds of so many timewasters if the site not just this one isnt full of them????
I didn't state any numbers/percentages and as far as I can recall, nobody else has on this thread. It's not just maths - it's the effort you put in (or don't) and how much effort you make to weed out the 'timewasters'. You've said that you're not willing to try any harder so unfortunately you'll probably find that you'll meet more and that people aren't any more likely to chat to you than they were before this thread.
Rolo stop getting ya knickers in a twist. If you have a problem with the chatroom and being ignored, I have already offered to hold your hand and I'm sure all the other ops would be willing to help too. It's what we're here for.
I had a quick nosy at your profile (as you do) and I can see from it that you are looking for a bi lady to play with Mrs Rolo whilst you watch. That can be a tough one to crack for one thing and anyone that doesn't fit your criteria may not bother to chat. It's a shame but a fact. The only other thing that I notice is that you are both fairly young and there are many folk that won't play with certain age groups. Not for any horrible reason, maybe just because they want someone older than their eldest offspring or stuff like that.
As you have said earlier you don't go in chat alot, give it some time and I'm sure you'll be fine.
I had a quick nosy at your profile (as you do) and I can see from it that you are looking for a bi lady to play with Mrs Rolo whilst you watch. That can be a tough one to crack for one thing and anyone that doesn't fit your criteria may not bother to chat. It's a shame but a fact. The only other thing that I notice is that you are both fairly young and there are many folk that won't play with certain age groups. Not for any horrible reason, maybe just because they want someone older than their eldest offspring or stuff like that.
As you have said earlier you don't go in chat alot, give it some time and I'm sure you'll be fine.
Sex God
*puts another pound in the jar*
At this rate I will have paid for my new motor before I pick it up what with all this timewaster baloney...
At this rate I will have paid for my new motor before I pick it up what with all this timewaster baloney...
Sex God
Quote by lastrolo
also just noticed on the thread below this one someone else having the same complaint quoted below and yet again someone else being made to look like they are in the wrong by regs on SH.
from Post subject: Frustration on allocation…
Posted: Thu Jan 3, 2008 2:51 pm
We have only been members for a matter on months and are already becoming increasing frustrated with the amount of fake people on this site. We see a profile from a "couple" from our town that is obviously a very lonely bored single male acting up. This guy was trying to pass off pictures of a Big Brother contestant as his Mrs and now this has changed to a file photo we have seen in many of places. I raised my concerns with SH but NOTHING has been done. I guess as long as SH collect there membership fee's they really don’t care what goes on in this place.
We have visited clubs and discussed SH with many people who are seemingly hitting the same problems as us. Everybody seems of the same opinion that when you REALLY break it down it’s a split of approx 90% single men with the other split between couples and woman. What makes it worse is that out of all these men about half of them will run a mile or never turn up should you arrange something.
Our suggestion to this place is a feedback scoring system. If you were let down like we have been you should be able to leave feedback suggesting so. If you have a meeting with these people and they are who they say they are and they are genuine you should be able to say so with the same going for cam fun. I believe that just the deterrent of this would be a great positive step for SH although I am sure memberships and fees would drop so I guess we will never see this happen!!!
And that thread was locked. Their point was about verification - yours was about nobody chatting to you. Verification has been discussed before this became a pay site, which of course you'll remember from your many hours spent on the forum. It's unworkable because it's open to abuse.
The regulars didn't make gnb look 'in the wrong', they answered their post and then a mod locked it.
:rotflmao: 