that's as close as I could get
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Darkfire
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female, 50
0 miles · Greater London
Forum
) green fingered ....Quote by LilMissGullable
what's a kitchen??
Us women wouldn't expect you to know.....
Your a bloke!!!!
not the last time I looked !!!
OOooooops sorry
My appologies......
What ever can i do to make your forgive me
:giggle: You really don't know Darkfire do you??????
C x
Errrrrrrrr.......no
Come say hello at the Wigan Munch hun, I wont bite :twisted: - mine's a jack daniels on ice!
Funnily enough, I've actually had a couple of people at parties & socials come over, stare at my munch badge :shock:
hwoar: and say "Oh My God, I thought you were a bloke!"Dark goes off into the quiet corner and contemplates what it is I'm doing wrong!!?? :doh:
Quote by Calista
what's a kitchen??
Us women wouldn't expect you to know.....
Your a bloke!!!!
not the last time I looked !!!
OOooooops sorry
My appologies......
What ever can i do to make your forgive me
:giggle: You really don't know Darkfire do you??????
C x
:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :twisted: :giggle:
Quote by Calista
This flat costs a fortune to heat, so I need to find ways of keeping warm this winter, therefore ..............
I'd like a Nymphomaniac, Dominant man with oooooodles of stamina but who also has a slightly domestic streak in him. He must have a filthy, adventurous mind and the strength of character to take me to the darkest most seedy, depths of his soul. :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
Not too much to ask is it?
You're on the right site .... could name a few of those on here :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
C x
where where???!! pm me, quick! :evil2:
Is there any chance of squeezing a little one in?? (i'll sit quiet in the corner and think thin all night i promise! )
I know I've left it really late..
Am feeling especially gutted today as I didnt go to the Glasgow munch - but if there's a chance you could squeeze me in I'll start fluttering my eyelashes for a lift/ floorspace
Dark x (in particularly cheeky mode)
)I know I've left it really late..
Am feeling especially gutted today as I didnt go to the Glasgow munch - but if there's a chance you could squeeze me in I'll start fluttering my eyelashes for a lift/ floorspace
Dark x (in particularly cheeky mode)
Quote by Calista
I think I'm getting what I want for christmas :bounce:
My kitchen needs decorating (like it's had no paper etc for nearly two and a half years) and so I refuse to have anyone round. My Mother in Law has invited the family round here for our annual meal together:taz: so I ummed and said with the state the kitchen was in I wasn't really happy .... lo and behold hubby and father in law are decorating it in a couple of weekends :bounce: :bounce:
C x
Oh you lucky lucky woman you!
When they've finished, could you please send em round to mine?? but, my entire house looks like a building site so there's plenty of work, just no cash to make things better!! I would love to get just semi-straight and see wallpaper instead of patched up plaster and invite some SH friends round - but, as things stand, i dont even let the meter man in!! :cry:
Quote by kjb01
But Effort is important in any new/old relationship as competition grows; these days, young lads will have to be well groomed, wear expensive designer outfit, have their nails done, put make up on, go to the Gym regular, look after their hair and look after their sexual health, as otherwise the lady who does make the effort, will soon look elsewhere. Do i sound like an old fart or what???
I think this one's a given anyway - well, it had better be!! :jagsatwork:
dunno about the designer outfits, make up and nails done on blokes though - jeans and a decent fitting tshirt work fine for me - as long as they're clean! make up? nooooooooo, nails dont have to be manicured - just short & clean will do nicely. I'd even say the just-home-from-the-building-site look works fine for me as long as he's washed his hands and taken care of personal hygiene... Been sweating like a pig at work all day and you want me to put what in my mouth??? :shock:
Effort wise I dont think it hurts - if you're 'arrannging' a meet rather than say pulling someone in a club - to perhaps make the effort of getting a bottle or two of her favorite wine....in proper wine glasses not mugs... you know, these little things that blokes just dont bother with when they *think* they're guaranteed a shag!
Quote by kjb01
dunno
This is mentioned by most women, but realistically, how many guys can, on their first shag of the day, last for 25 minutes? until the woman is aroused?
First rule of asking for ladies opinions and advice about what we want in bed - dont ask for them then dismiss the one's you do get cos the suggestion isnt 'realistic' !! If it's mentioned by 'most women' then surely this should indicate that we might actually be serious about it being a problem??!!
- and I didnt say blokes should bang away for 25 minutes either!! - i'm definatly with Calista on this one (and Meaty :shock: ) - foreplay works - and works well. :thumbup: but perhaps the point i was trying to get across was not so much about how much foreplay there is, or how long you can simply keep thrusting for...... I think the main thing that we, and certainly I want, is effort. Its that favorite SH saying again - you get out of it what you put in, and its exactly the same for sex!
Someone makes the effort to look nice, dress well, wear sexy underwear or whatever other effort they've put into a meet for you, I think the very least that should be offered is compliments, and the effort reciprocated. Is it really too much to ask? :twisted:
Quote by markz
What was the score ???
dunno
, blokes being blokes it was all over and done with in 3 minutes flat and i didnt hang around for the match. 
we have to do it quickly so you lot can get back to the ironing
:fuckinghell: @ ironing !! :jagsatwork:
Quote by kjb01
Looking at some of the previous discussions, it looks like there are lots of dissatisfied ladies and lots of guys who don't know the tricks of the trade. I think this calls for a SH Academy to be set up (initially virtual of course an may be one day with real classroom sessions), where Ladies would openly disclose likes and dislikes and how to get them to reach climax, including techniques to use, and guys will practice on partners and report back the results, so that we can learn from mistakes and can compile a dictionary of "How to" !!!
... I can then after a few weeks gather all the findings and publish to SH members, so there is no excuse for lack satisfaction in our beloved female community.
:idea: KJB - best stick Markz on that members hitlist :doh:
:lol2:
Quote by Velvet Lips
And on the materialistic point, time and time again I get requests for sexy underwear, kinky outfits etc, which I'm always happy to wear but I'm also expected to pay for them as well, and I telling you, they don't come cheap!!!
oh goooooood point velvet!!
Ok, my contribution -
Considering the amount of effort we ladies often put into a 'meet', firstly, a few sincere compliments won't go amiss.
Blokes: shit shower and shave and you're ready.
Women : shit shower shave.... plus full leg wax, underarm wax, residue removal, all over body lotion for silky soft skin, fake tan application, eyebrow shaping, plucking with tweezers to upper lip/ nasal hair/ stray pubes that escaped the waxing, nails filed and painted, face on, hair done, 36 changes of clothes incorportaing entire contents of wardrobe(s) and 10 coordinating pairs of shoes/boots, not forgetting the hammering of the credit card in Ann Summers on underwear.... choose perfume, re-do face, squoosh of hairspray...........drive umpteen miles with some arsehole up ya bumper making sexual gestures like a horned-up teenager....get there, re-apply gorgeous tasting lipstick, final check in mirror, remove cheeswire thong that's splitting your ass in two.....get to door...
and he says....
Fancy a quickie then luv? the footy's on in 20 minutes.
:shock:
Quote by kjb01
It is now perfectly clear;
MATERIALS. prefer materials to a good hard shag, by the looks of it. However, i don't think rich men get more shags either, once their Mrs has got her hands on the house!
No No No
ooo you blokes just dont get it do you - I spell it out loud and clear and you lot still think we want materialistic side and sod the sex!
it has to come as a package - materialism = we want to be treated like a lady, bit of respect, and if that's not dooable, diamonds will suffice.
But material goods and gifts are no good on their own, this only works when they're hand delivered by a 6ft sex god with a 10 inch cock! :lol2:
oh, and i forgot the ability to breath through ears bit
-
Quote by kjb01
I take it lack of female response to this means either:
1. they don't really know what they want or
2. they don't want men to know what they want, so that they can slag men off afterwards for being crap or
3. it doesn't matter to anyone!
None of the above
(well, perhaps number 2, kinda, cos we slag men off anyway cos usually even if they know what we want we dont bloody get it!! ......shopping spree in Agent Provocateur......champagne & stawberries.....Jimmy Choo killer heels...... Tiffany jewellery.....6 bedroom mansion complete with paddock, pool and 50 acres of land....oh, and a half decent shag 7 nights a week with a bloke who can breathe through his ears...)Oooo, I digress
, I think we're waiting with baited breath for the blokes to show some initiative here...... and given this prize example: Wheres your self respect?, we could be in for a long night!
Just slap her on the arse and tell her to beg!
Quote by Nomad_Soul
did you know the use of lipstick originates from wanting to have the oral labia resemble the blood-flushed look of the aroused aroused genital labia; this indicates that the female is sexually ready. :shock:
Dunno about that but Darkkfire had some gorgeous tasting lippo at Derby
:shock: :shock:
Babes, that wasn't lippy, that was just me!
:lickface:
HiyaWelcome to SH!
:welcome: it might be a bit quiet round here over the weekend - all the rowdy lot
have buggered off up to the Scottish munch! - but, welcome anyway and you have a whole saturday and sunday to get settled in and comfy before the hangover brigade 
get back! Dark x (who's boring and skint this weekend
) 