Fat, ugly, old frog seeks princess of indeterminate age (may already have prince) to corrupt to vile and beastly ways. Kissing me won't turn me into a handsome prince but might lead to some amusing, decedant dalliance.

Me, own hair and teeth, know which knife and fork to use when faced with a choice, know the difference between sauvignon blanc and cabernet sauvignon, what to eat with them and how to cook it. Can sail a yaucht and put up shelves.

Bored to distarction with vanila, seeking someone (couple) to explore the boundaries. Can't spell

Have been told that am competant and good fun in the bedroom but am probably crap like most blokes and they were just being nice!!

If you get the joke and can read between the lines do get in touch/ reply