ish is right lol i only live here i aint welsh :doh:
I used to have a buddy on this site at one time -- she had the couples profile and I kept my "single male" profile so we could both be in chat at the same time. Although we both mostly used the mids room, she would sometimes browse round the other rooms, so If I wanted to speak to her I too would browse. The number of times I was illegally and unceremoniously kicked out of "couples only" chatrooms before I had even had a chance to say "has anyone seen xxxxxxxxx" was unbelievable. Personally I find the whole idea very divisive and undesirable.
I used to have a buddy on this site at one time -- she had the couples profile and I kept my "single male" profile so we could both be in chat at the same time. Although we both mostly used the mids room, she would sometimes browse round the other rooms, so If I wanted to speak to her I too would browse. The number of times I was illegally and unceremoniously kicked out of "couples only" chatrooms before I had even had a chance to say "has anyone seen xxxxxxxxx" was unbelievable. Personally I find the whole idea very divisive and undesirable.
A and A xx
Before commenting on the issue overall, first of all we will respond to this comment:
This is a vile and disgusting idea. It seems to me that AshaandAlex want the option to open their own little club where they can invite their own friends and exclude everyone else.
If this is how it seemed, then I am afraid you have us seriously misjudged. This was not the intention behind the suggestion and a suggestion is all it was, the post being prompted by the events below. While I appreciate that we have upset you, for which I apologise as that was never the intention, do not ever presume to speak for us or our own intentions. There is no need for such language or superstition on our part.
This posting came about because one night when Asha was in the main chat room, she just received barrage after barrage of uninvited whispers from single guys. Most of the time to be honest, it doesn't bother us to a great degree, we either ignore them or post them in the room, or in most cases actually, when they're polite or a just offering a compliment we will respond, as I am sure many people will attest to. However on this particular occasion there was just too many and some of them got quite offensive when she wouldn't respond so for the first time she opened her own room (this is the one and only occasion that she has done this, though I have done it a couple of times since) which she labelled couples only, no single men. There were no moderators in the main room we were in at the time, otherwise there were a couple of people we might have reported, but I should add none of those people have posted on this topic.
When she opened the room for couples, she did kick quite a few single guys out a few of them were the same people and they followed her in there, some of them were obviously just looking in the room. It was pointed out to her that she was not allowed to kick someone without any of the reasons being mentioned on the site, so she stopped doing so and apologised. However what followed in the room at that time was then a discussion on this very issue that we have talked about here, and there were many couples who were asking the same thing at that time. So I was curious to see what people thought about it, it was certainly not an official request to ask for a room on our behalf, I was more curious to see why there was not one and even if there was one, we would only use it when we want to talk to couples only, which would not be all the time. On balance I think if the majority of the membership finds the idea of such a room distasteful or offensive then perhaps there shouldn’t be one, that will be for the site owners to decide.
I think that statements about ‘now we will have to have a blacks only room as well’, etc etc are unrealistic and distract from the issue of swinging. By its very nature the scene has always been divided in two main groups (yes there are different preferences that people have within that, for sure) and those are couples and singles, and as we know 95 percent of couples will play with single girls, but not single guys, so it really breaks into couples and single guys. Almost all the clubs in the UK have couples only nights and they have them for that reason, because there is a huge part of the scene that plays on a couples only basis. There are various reasons for people wanting to do that, another topic completely on its own which I won’t get bogged down with here. Although we do not advertise for single men and state we aren’t looking for them on our profile, we do play with them from time to time and we are also in general happy to chat to them, or anyone else really but not everyone feels that way. Our profile states couples only because when I used this site with my ex and had single men written on our profile, we just got too much mail from people, even when we stated preferences to minimise our responses people just didn’t read them. Not the end of the world, but its easy to understand why some people state their preferences a little more harshly than we do. We have actually played with three single guys from the site recently and they were all very nice people and hopefully if asked they will say the same about us. We have recommended them on our profile, if anyone doubts this. Secondly, in the main chat rooms, which I have to say I have enjoyed while Asha has been away, ( and I am very greatful to the people who sent us all their best wishes in our present time of grief thanks a million by the way) some people just continue to break the rules with smutty whispered requests. As I said before, I am not bothered by these personally, hey we’re all horny people, some more than others or more often than others it would seem but everyone is on the scene for different reasons, to simply say ‘for sex’ would be over simplifying it and painting far too broad a brushstroke on the issue. Everyone wants different things from this experience. Some guys will promise a girl the world, and then once they’ve got a phone wank out of it hang up and never call them again. So hey its good that people can open their own room saying 12 inch cock on cam or whatever. I might not be rushing into that room personally, but I am sure others would be.
As for democracy, well I am all for that, otherwise we wouldn’t be able to have this discussion on the subject.
Anyway if you managed to read through all that my view on the subject is not that strong either way. I think if there was a room, couples would use it when they only wanted to chat to other couples, I don’t think the rest of chat would especially suffer, people do jump around ‘For a wander’ a lot anyway, If there wasn’t a room like it, not the end of the world either. Asha is in Uganda right now, but her view on this is similar to mine, except she would like a couples room where single guys can’t whisper unless couples or single girls have a button that invites them do so. At the end of the day, seeing as people are suppose to ask anyway, I can see her point on that one.
Anyways, it was never our intention to offend anyone, just to hear people’s thoughts after we had some sight into the issue following the chat in the room that time.
Thanks for reading (if you got to the end you win a cookie)
Alex
Alex
kick em for the first offence and keep on kicking until they learn to read !
So how do you know when they can read then if you keep kicking them .. hehe
I don't like the idea either..... and i think my views are fairly well known.... but i don't think it will it will take off when they realise it will exclude single woman as well as single men.....
and i bet they all come back......
I can see where bbw is coming from... let me think about where this could end up eventually....
i'll just use for example the "kent room" since something that came up before a few weeks ago.....
someone asked a few weeks ago why someone would go into a chatroom outside of there area....
now I suppose that if the new chatroom was that good as someone asked that everyone outside of kent was barred from entering the room (all you would have to do is simply check by postcode) would this be allowed???.... after all you allowed it for couples....
then if a couple wanted to split away from that and have a couples only room from kent...... would that be allowed????
in which case where in fact do you draw the line....seriously.... the site is fragmented enough as it is
I don't normally say what I am about to.... sometimes I wish we could go back to being just the one chatroom, because maybe that way people would learn to be more opened minded and tolerant, that seems to have gone out the window lately
I'll say the same thing, as i said when someone wanted to organise there own singles social....
you are potentially opening up a pandora's box..... if you do open it then don't complain about the consecquences afterwards........
In my thoughts it may seem petty in the 'grand scheme' of things but these little petty things have a knock on effect, typically domino theory like, until the little petty things are not so little anymore.
Why would we want to start doing exclusivity when the whole idea is that, as we go on, society becomes more tolerant and at one with itself and its people.
I should put an opinion I suppose to further the debate so. In my view i'm not happy as i i've stated in previous times about rooms saying things such as black dicks 4 white chicks type rooms. I feel it comes across as exclusive. I'm certainly not anti black. And also in that same vein of thought a white dick for black chicks room would piss me off. I dont want to be. or want anyone else to be, pigeon holed.
I understand that people have the right to some preferences. Thats a personal thing and maybe should not be shouted out in a title.
As for the idea of singles or couples only rooms thats pooh! as flower has intimated it woould die a death. Most single guys are great and add to chat (chat remember) viva la single guys. Maybe couples sometimes forget how difficult it can be for single guys to get on in here. And to be castagated against for wanting to be in the same room as couples is bollox. This goes further than at first thought. The ideology though not recognised is wrong surely?
I don't believe for a minute that anyone is purposely trying to be devisive or 'ist' in anyway but the underlying ramifications are worth a ponder. At that point maybe people can see the problem.
Within chatland it is not like being stuck in a lift when someone farts is it eh? Think about it. If you dont like whats going on and think its Wrong, there is a system of redress in the chatrooms, use it.
:roll: you will be able to open Couples only rooms.
:? :?
:hump::hump: 
