chat room abuse

Warming the Bed

0 likes 23 May 2014

if some one opens a chat room and hosts is it not their job to police chat and when people abuse others should they not stop this abuse rather than join in,happens so much in one room and why can people pass room ownership to people that have been banned from opening rooms (like me im silly )so the abuse carries on..... feel free to comment

pebble

Casanova

0 likes 23 May 2014

As far as I understand it, the keyholder has the privilege but not the obligation of enforcing the AUP... But they are a user themselves, and if you think they are breaking the rules, report the f*ck out of them all!
I am curious - is there really a ban specific to opening your own rooms?

Unknown User

0 likes 24 May 2014

Quote by pebble
As far as I understand it, the keyholder has the privilege but not the obligation of enforcing the AUP

Succinct as ever, yup that is pretty much it

Quote by pebble
... But they are a user themselves, and if you think they are breaking the rules, report the f*ck out of them all!

Absolutely!

Quote by pebble
I am curious

Oh come on, you're wayyyyyyy past the curious stage, uh huh!

Quote by pebble
- is there really a ban specific to opening your own rooms?

Not quite sure I follow, a member can have the 'privilege' of creating their own room(s)
removed from them by way of restricting their ability to create them, there are a host of reasons as to why that may occur. Would you like me to list all 72307 of them?
---

Quote by freddiefish
if some one opens a chat room and hosts is it not their job to police chat

Fredders meluvvly, not sure 'police chat' is the correct terminology but in any case in an ideal world it would be nice if they could help run the show in a smooth and even manner but it's not always easy to do when things go a bit Pete Tong.

Quote by freddiefish
and when people abuse others should they not stop this abuse rather than join in

You'd like to think so but sadly it's not always the case, if there is a specific incident/issue you have in mind send in a report or grab hold of an Op (well not literally, some of us are dead delicate you know) or send me an email (make some of it smutty)

Quote by freddiefish
and why can people pass room ownership to people that have been banned from opening rooms (like me im silly )

That 'get round' is being looked at meluvvly, but in the meantime if you know of an instance where the above has occurred could you let one of us know the details please.
There are relatively few keyholder restrictions in place and anyone that is restricted can always ask an Op to take a looksie at having it removed (it's not always given that it will be, but no harm in asking )

freddiefish

Warming the Bed

0 likes 24 May 2014

Quote by pebble
As far as I understand it, the keyholder has the privilege but not the obligation of enforcing the AUP... But they are a user themselves, and if you think they are breaking the rules, report the f*ck out of them all!
I am curious - is there really a ban specific to opening your own rooms?

pebble for you i will google it and practice

freddiefish

Warming the Bed

0 likes 26 May 2014

Quote by freddiefish
As far as I understand it, the keyholder has the privilege but not the obligation of enforcing the AUP... But they are a user themselves, and if you think they are breaking the rules, report the f*ck out of them all!
I am curious - is there really a ban specific to opening your own rooms?

pebble for you i will google it and practice
ok police probably to strong a word but monitor chat and deal with bad behaveour

Unknown User

0 likes 2 Jun 2014

Quote by pebble
As far as I understand it, the keyholder has the privilege but not the obligation of enforcing the AUP... But they are a user themselves, and if you think they are breaking the rules, report the f*ck out of them all!
I am curious - is there really a ban specific to opening your own rooms?

Reporting doesnt always work though pebble, unfortunately anonymity isnt guaranteed and then you leave yourself open to yet more abuse by reporting it. Its never going to be perfect as its not opped 24/7 and the regular abuse that some people seem to dole out on a daily basis goes unreported because of that very same reason :/

pebble

Casanova

0 likes 3 Jun 2014

Quote by Katniss
Reporting doesnt always work though pebble, unfortunately anonymity isnt guaranteed and then you leave yourself open to yet more abuse by reporting it.

:-o That is just unacceptable.

Quote by Katniss
the regular abuse that some people seem to dole out on a daily basis goes unreported because of that very same reason :/

This is pretty serious! "Regular abuse"?! I am horrified to hear it. The chat may not be monitored 24/7 but that's what access to logs is for - if there are people that are being repetitively abusive they should be ear-marked and their activity checked regularly. Or is this something that is more subtle and low-key, like someone being a constantly disagreeable or personal disagreements/resentment that is always brooding and taints the chat?

Unknown User

0 likes 3 Jun 2014

Quote by Katniss
Reporting doesnt always work though pebble, unfortunately anonymity isnt guaranteed and then you leave yourself open to yet more abuse by reporting it.

Quote by pebble
:-o That is just unacceptable.

Hang on a mo, reporting a member is anonymous (save to the Ops/Mods/Admin of course). If a report is made we won't usually discuss with the reported who the reporter is. However, if there is an disagreement between various parties and one side goes on to make a report and said report needs the reported to be spoken to then in some instances it's probably not too difficult to the reported member to deduce where a report has come from *shrugs* but confirmation of that wont normally be given by an Op (unless circumstances dictate)

Quote by Katniss
the regular abuse that some people seem to dole out on a daily basis goes unreported because of that very same reason :/

Quote by pebble
This is pretty serious! "Regular abuse"?! I am horrified to hear it. The chat may not be monitored 24/7 but that's what access to logs is for - if there are people that are being repetitively abusive they should be ear-marked and their activity checked regularly. Or is this something that is more subtle and low-key, like someone being a constantly disagreeable or personal disagreements/resentment that is always brooding and taints the chat?

Difficult to respond to Kat's original post without being specific, but in general, if a member is suffering from what they feel is abuse and it's brought to the attention of the Ops/Mods/Admin it does without fail get looked at. It may not always be the case that action is taken against a reported member but I can assure you it's looked at and the merits of the report weighed up.
An individuals perception as to what constitutes as abuse is just that, individual, what one person sees as banter/caustic humour/sarcasm another may see as abusive/negative/irritating, this is where lines become blurred and differences of opinion on what constitutes as 'abuse' may occur, resulting sometimes with a disgruntled member thinking their complaint has fallen on deaf ears (when for the most part it hasn't)

Unknown User

0 likes 3 Jun 2014

Quote by Toots
Reporting doesnt always work though pebble, unfortunately anonymity isnt guaranteed and then you leave yourself open to yet more abuse by reporting it.

Quote by pebble
:-o That is just unacceptable.

Hang on a mo, reporting a member is anonymous (save to the Ops/Mods/Admin of course). If a report is made we won't usually discuss with the reported who the reporter is. However, if there is an disagreement between various parties and one side goes on to make a report and said report needs the reported to be spoken to then in some instances it's probably not too difficult to the reported member to deduce where a report has come from *shrugs* but confirmation of that wont normally be given by an Op (unless circumstances dictate)

Quote by Katniss
the regular abuse that some people seem to dole out on a daily basis goes unreported because of that very same reason :/

Quote by pebble
This is pretty serious! "Regular abuse"?! I am horrified to hear it. The chat may not be monitored 24/7 but that's what access to logs is for - if there are people that are being repetitively abusive they should be ear-marked and their activity checked regularly. Or is this something that is more subtle and low-key, like someone being a constantly disagreeable or personal disagreements/resentment that is always brooding and taints the chat?

Difficult to respond to Kat's original post without being specific, but in general, if a member is suffering from what they feel is abuse and it's brought to the attention of the Ops/Mods/Admin it does without fail get looked at. It may not always be the case that action is taken against a reported member but I can assure you it's looked at and the merits of the report weighed up.
An individuals perception as to what constitutes as abuse is just that, individual, what one person sees as banter/caustic humour/sarcasm another may see as abusive/negative/irritating, this is where lines become blurred and differences of opinion on what constitutes as 'abuse' may occur, resulting sometimes with a disgruntled member thinking their complaint has fallen on deaf ears (when for the most part it hasn't) i think both admin and the chat o[s do a fantastic job if i am honest if your out of line or getting close they will soon tell you ...... happy swinging smile

pebble

Casanova

0 likes 4 Jun 2014

Quote by Toots
An individuals perception as to what constitutes as abuse is just that, individual, what one person sees as banter/caustic humour/sarcasm another may see as abusive/negative/irritating

OK I understand the problem entirely (and why reporting is not effective or safe for the person making the complaint). I am not criticising the efforts of the site or the ops in keeping the peace, I understand it is very hard to be making these kinds of judgements. But I just can't stand low-level bullying... I've reported incidents for what some consider very very little and some (men) say this is stifling and it is spoiling the freedom of the place. But freedom has to be for everyone! It is no good if some members are treated with disrespect and made to feel uncomfortable or even unsafe. If the sarky banter is making someone uncomfortable then it should be tempered down, if not stopped. dunno

Unknown User

0 likes 4 Jun 2014

Quote by pebble
An individuals perception as to what constitutes as abuse is just that, individual, what one person sees as banter/caustic humour/sarcasm another may see as abusive/negative/irritating

OK I understand the problem entirely (and why reporting is not effective or safe for the person making the complaint). I am not criticising the efforts of the site or the ops in keeping the peace, I understand it is very hard to be making these kinds of judgements. But I just can't stand low-level bullying... I've reported incidents for what some consider very very little and some (men) say this is stifling and it is spoiling the freedom of the place. But freedom has to be for everyone! It is no good if some members are treated with disrespect and made to feel uncomfortable or even unsafe. If the sarky banter is making someone uncomfortable then it should be tempered down, if not stopped. dunno

All I can say to the above is that members are entitled and actively encouraged to make a report if they feel there is a problem that needs looking at or they need help with..All reports are looked at in an impartial manner and dealt with accordingly. We may not always get it right, to err is human and all that.
A member being treated in a disrespectful manner or made to feel uncomfortable are at times difficult to spot/gauge and in the absence of a logcheck (as Ops we can request them/admin to look at them) we don't always get the full picture straight away or in some instances not at all, but when we do see it/observe it/get told about it it we will do our best to step in and attempt to smooth the ruffles.
In regards to the 'sarky banter is making someone uncomfortable then it should be tempered down' easier said than done is that, it goes without saying that some are more sensitive to others, I have dealt with incidents where a member has been seemingly incandescent with rage at being called 'arsey' wanting the offending member banished from the site for all eternity and yet others have in their report cut-n-pasted an absolute torrent of abuse aimed at them and where they've simply stated ' Could you have a word with them please' *shrugs*
The chat (usually in the Pool but not specific to ) can be pacey, feisty with much going on, sometimes things get said that shouldn't or are taken out of context, the emotion/intent behind the written word isn't always easy to read and then add to the mix hidden agenda or innuendo ..well it's all going on and where some will invariably and through no particular fault of their own (or others even) feel aggrieved over a comment(s) and before you know it WW3 is on it's way.
To quote Abraham Lincoln
"You can please some of the people some of the time all of the people some of the time some of the people all of the time but you can never please all of the people all of the time"
but by eck we'll have a go.

freddiefish

Warming the Bed

0 likes 11 Jun 2014

once again i witnissed a room host join the mob and instead of defusing the situation decided to be a bully .. seems to be a trait in some rooms

Quote by Toots
An individuals perception as to what constitutes as abuse is just that, individual, what one person sees as banter/caustic humour/sarcasm another may see as abusive/negative/irritating

OK I understand the problem entirely (and why reporting is not effective or safe for the person making the complaint). I am not criticising the efforts of the site or the ops in keeping the peace, I understand it is very hard to be making these kinds of judgements. But I just can't stand low-level bullying... I've reported incidents for what some consider very very little and some (men) say this is stifling and it is spoiling the freedom of the place. But freedom has to be for everyone! It is no good if some members are treated with disrespect and made to feel uncomfortable or even unsafe. If the sarky banter is making someone uncomfortable then it should be tempered down, if not stopped. dunno

All I can say to the above is that members are entitled and actively encouraged to make a report if they feel there is a problem that needs looking at or they need help with..All reports are looked at in an impartial manner and dealt with accordingly. We may not always get it right, to err is human and all that.
A member being treated in a disrespectful manner or made to feel uncomfortable are at times difficult to spot/gauge and in the absence of a logcheck (as Ops we can request them/admin to look at them) we don't always get the full picture straight away or in some instances not at all, but when we do see it/observe it/get told about it it we will do our best to step in and attempt to smooth the ruffles.
In regards to the 'sarky banter is making someone uncomfortable then it should be tempered down' easier said than done is that, it goes without saying that some are more sensitive to others, I have dealt with incidents where a member has been seemingly incandescent with rage at being called 'arsey' wanting the offending member banished from the site for all eternity and yet others have in their report cut-n-pasted an absolute torrent of abuse aimed at them and where they've simply stated ' Could you have a word with them please' *shrugs*
The chat (usually in the Pool but not specific to ) can be pacey, feisty with much going on, sometimes things get said that shouldn't or are taken out of context, the emotion/intent behind the written word isn't always easy to read and then add to the mix hidden agenda or innuendo ..well it's all going on and where some will invariably and through no particular fault of their own (or others even) feel aggrieved over a comment(s) and before you know it WW3 is on it's way.
To quote Abraham Lincoln
"You can please some of the people some of the time all of the people some of the time some of the people all of the time but you can never please all of the people all of the time"
but by eck we'll have a go.

Unknown User

0 likes 12 Jun 2014

Freddie, all you can do is report it and hope the room host has their priviledges rescinded (cant spell i cant smile

)

Unknown User

0 likes 17 Jun 2014

some ppl feel left out due to the speed of the room and the banter that takes place therefore they are not happy at what they see as being left out.i have found the ops do step in when the banter gets out of hand as that is what they are there for to keep the peice and they also join in the chat and banter at times which makes for a happy are rooms other than the pool wich are a tad slower and less clicky get clicking....

Lizaleanrob

Sex God

0 likes 3 Feb 2015

I don't know about now but some years back the ops used to visit the rooms under different names to catch certain abusers,
quite effective it was too wink

Unknown User

0 likes 14 Apr 2015

Quote by Lizaleanrob
I don't know about now but some years back the ops used to visit the rooms under different names to catch certain abusers,
quite effective it was too

Oooh, that's like DOUBLY covert. Already being covert, in that they can observe covertly. But then to go undercover, in a different name? That's so covert, but in an overt way. Overtly covert. These OP's don't mess about. They're just like Jason Bourne :wink: but sexier.

Dan_Lexa

Warming the Bed

0 likes 14 Apr 2015

Quote by the_magik_s
They're just like Jason Bourne but sexier.

Jason Bourne, now that is pretty damned sexy it must be said

Woohoo

Mod

0 likes 17 Apr 2015

We take all abuse very seriously indeed ,and as most of us have being helping out on the site for years,we can sometimes tell,what is banter and what is abuse,ok sometimes we get it wrong but we are human,no matter what anyone thinks. wink

We are here to help,advise and also have a laugh and make this site the great place I think it is.
If no Op is on line then,its very easy to report abuse, by clicking on the person's profile and then use the report profile tab.
Include the room name and the approximate time,so we can check the logs and then take action.
Ultimately we are ALL here to have fun whether that is by meeting up or having a chat,doesn't matter,it's all about having a laugh and feeling safe and secure in the knowledge that, you have a good team of people looking after you on this site,and who actually care about its members.

Unknown User

0 likes 18 Apr 2015

Quote by woohoo
We take all abuse very seriously indeed ,and as most of us have being helping out on the site for years,we can sometimes tell,what is banter and what is abuse,ok sometimes we get it wrong but we are human,no matter what anyone thinks.
We are here to help,advise and also have a laugh and make this site the great place I think it is.
If no Op is on line then,its very easy to report abuse, by clicking on the person's profile and then use the report profile tab.
Include the room name and the approximate time,so we can check the logs and then take action.
Ultimately we are ALL here to have fun whether that is by meeting up or having a chat,doesn't matter,it's all about having a laugh and feeling safe and secure in the knowledge that, you have a good team of people looking after you on this site,and who actually care about its members.

:worship::worship: