I don't go on camera very often any more but a couple of weeks I did, it was in the morning. I wasn't the room's main attraction, I was watching the room owners and wasn't putting on a show myself, I was mostly just sitting there perving and chatting a bit in the room. On that same day, in the afternoon, in one of the lobbies a user I do not know and have never spoken to one-on-one, seemingly unprovoked said in the main room that "pebble is a stuck-up biatch". He also referred to something I said earlier in the day, when I was on camera. When I asked him what he meant, he simply said "you heard me" or something equally illuminating.
I was upset - because that man was obviously passing judgement on who or what I am, based on having seen me on camera... And because he also felt entitled enough to tell the room what I was, as if putting me in my place (note how his comment was not directed at me, he wasn't even talking to me). But at the same time, I wondered if I was overreacting, if it was simply a case of jesting (though not sure what is so funny about insults?). For this reason I did not report.
So my question is, how do know when/where to draw the line? How do you know when to tell someone to back the f*ck off, how do you know when to report? And at the end of the day, how do you handle the underhanded remarks, the thinly veiled insults, the general negativity that people throw your way?
Having spent a fair few hours on various forums in my life i guess i would just say that when there is a screen between the two of you people can say petty and offensive things with virtually no consequence or exposure. Just the other day a man called Mario Ballotelli (controversial liverpool player) received thousands of racist tweets, the police said they are launching an investigation but most of the accounts have been deleted.
Anonymity on the internet has its good and bad points but this sort of behaviour will always be a problem. I guess my advice would be to report it and then ignore it as best you can, unless you want to get involved in petty online arguments... which is of course very, very tempting.
Personally, I think that type of comment is unacceptable and should be reported. They may think it funny, or clever, but it can be very hurtful - I can understand why you were upset.
If someone has something to say then they should say it directly to you, and not in public, rather than just throwing a comment out there for all to see.
I would only jest with someone that I knew, because I would know they would take it as a joke, and never with a stranger.
I think you can be sure that most people in the chatrooms are able to see the tw*ts when they appear (in my short time in the chatrooms I've seen a few) and will treat those comments with the contempt they deserve, rather than judging you.
The line is drawn by each individual in turn. What is acceptable for one person may not be for the next. Ultimately only you can decide where you draw the line, and if someone has overstepped it then report it without hesitation.
Thinly veiled insults or open comments to a third party are unfortunately all too familiar in the chatroom. In other circles it would be called cyber bullying, and you wouldn't stand for someone doing that to your kids, so report it.
This can be a difficult one. There's no way to know at the time whether the person passing comment meant anything by it. Lots of us throw sassy comments and insults at each other on a daily basis, and generally speaking it's all just a bit of fun. I've noticed that people can begin to feel that they know someone, just from watching a cam and from reading other exchanges in the chatroom, then they'll pass a comment which, if said to someone they really are familiar with, might be taken jokingly.
Nevertheless if a comment is found to be offensive, or upsetting, then the person guilty of making the remark should be reprimanded in the room. If it's then clearly meant as an insult, it should be reported, and there's no harm in letting the room know how you feel about offhanded comments.
