Hi.
I'm not new to this game, been "in" it for decades.
I'm looking for some new couples to do dogging with...I'm getting a bit fed-up with all these fit birds...20-somethings and nice bodies etc...gettin' bored with them...would like sum unfit birds...baggy bodies and sagging tits etc...something a bit "lived-in" in fact...like they know what goes where...you know the sort of thing...
I'm NOt fit, getting on to being ancient...5 foot tall and the same around...a bit over 21 stone and very decrepit...tried thetford forest but it wasn't quite big enough for me to fit in...would like to broaden (as in make bigger) my dogging horizons...
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dogging oldcomers
Sex God
Quote by jomu
I'm NOt fit, getting on to being ancient...5 foot tall and the same around...a bit over 21 stone and very decrepit...
:inlove: Where have you been hiding all my life
My ideal bloke! Just say where and when Jomu, where and when (In a pm of course) :lol: Sex God
Quote by GoodTimeTom69
Am I invited Naughty Wigan Couple!? lol
Only if you fit the same criteria as Jomu
there you go girls, if you are ever in a dark carpark, and feel old age creeping up on you, its probably only jomu ..must be awfull though, someone cleaning your shoes, and having to take their word for it!!..you need to get to our local jomu, plenty of earthy ladies there son, one regular strips down to her g-rope, gets out a set of tyre levers then shows the lads her kidneys..fucking great entertainment...oh, yeah, thetford forest, you do come to our site..and how frequently does this great event happen?
..must be awfull though, someone cleaning your shoes, and having to take their word for it!!..you need to get to our local jomu, plenty of earthy ladies there son, one regular strips down to her g-rope, gets out a set of tyre levers then shows the lads her kidneys..fucking great entertainment...oh, yeah, thetford forest, you do come to our site..and how frequently does this great event happen? I know about these "earthy-ladies", had a hand-job off one the other night.....I let a "visiting" dogger (let !) use my "local" last saturday night...he got a shag out of it...
Well, about thetford forest...I keep meaning to have another return visit....but I always seem to arrive just as the last ticket has been sold/given out.....as you know, space is at a premium there (the forest is big enough, but the carparks fill-up quickly)....last time there, there was a lady entertaining at the picnic tables....the queue stretched to thetford itself...I really must save the pennies for the fuel....before it costs too much to ever be able to travel there again...(!)
Then there's the other problem...so many good sites on the way....I never seem to get past Cambridge.............................................
Well, about thetford forest...I keep meaning to have another return visit....but I always seem to arrive just as the last ticket has been sold/given out.....as you know, space is at a premium there (the forest is big enough, but the carparks fill-up quickly)....last time there, there was a lady entertaining at the picnic tables....the queue stretched to thetford itself...I really must save the pennies for the fuel....before it costs too much to ever be able to travel there again...(!)
Then there's the other problem...so many good sites on the way....I never seem to get past Cambridge.............................................
Sex God
(Naughty gets out map, tyre levers, medical book to locate her kidneys and sets off for some forrest or other) Whoops forgot me shoe cleaning kit!
:lol: :lol:
:lol: :lol: 
Sorry...I'll read the AUP next week......and the advice files the week after that.....gotta get past the "my sacs full and I need to unload" post yet...
Anyway....'dipity....on my last visit to the said location, I arrived in the dark....(hides my inherent bad looks) and parked the motor....when I got out it was like a scene from "night of the zombies".........shambling shadows detached themselves from the trees...shufling slowly towards the car....a pincer movement developed from the left and the right wing moved to cover a possible escape route....then they noticed it was a single guy "just another wanker guys, no couple"....came from the scouts...at which point they formed an orderly group and continued talking....
Funny how they all seem to keep to the carpark...you walk into the trees and there are people shagging everywhere...oh well.....
I only go there when I fancy a drive...and coming back home from an airfield nearby...must get the planner and the longrange weather forecast out and go later in the year...
Anyway....'dipity....on my last visit to the said location, I arrived in the dark....(hides my inherent bad looks) and parked the motor....when I got out it was like a scene from "night of the zombies".........shambling shadows detached themselves from the trees...shufling slowly towards the car....a pincer movement developed from the left and the right wing moved to cover a possible escape route....then they noticed it was a single guy "just another wanker guys, no couple"....came from the scouts...at which point they formed an orderly group and continued talking....
Funny how they all seem to keep to the carpark...you walk into the trees and there are people shagging everywhere...oh well.....
I only go there when I fancy a drive...and coming back home from an airfield nearby...must get the planner and the longrange weather forecast out and go later in the year...
:whistling: :whistling: :whistling: 
:D :DQuote by Serendipity
Well, where have you been then?? Fall down a hole in the woods?
you speak in jest serendipity, but someone hung himself in the forest last year, it took the cops and army about two months to find him!!..geographically, its a vast place, and really is, just a massive dogging site..the popular spot, but not neccessarily the best, is only one of five venues within an eight mile stretch of road..the chances are that singledogger followed a couple into the forest back in february, and has only now re-emerged, happens all the time
talking of which, any of you guys seen harry"the rock" jones lately?you describe the venue well jomu, all those elements exist..our first show there was indeed to be a baptism of fire..there were at least 20 guys jostling for position..a guy we now know as "truckstop" was pushed to the ground, yet another guy hammered on the window throughout, whilst shining a torch on his very modest endowment..we made a tactical withdrawal when two doggers started to climb on the bonnet, in order to attain a view right down the barrel so to speak :lol:
having said that, we just love the place, the things we've seen, eh singledogger? jomu, when you do decide to grace us with your presence, be sure to tip us the wink..that way we can be sure to keep away, lest we find ourselves all over the board come morning :wink: only kidding mate..i think we can find space in the dogging tour bus to avail you of the various locations, hell, mrs dirty will even do a private dance for you, i'm sure :wink:
Sex God
Quote by Serendipity
Well, where have you been then?? Fall down a hole in the woods?
He was busy releasing BeepBeep who was tied to a tree three days ago by Deancannock, but Single D had a few problems with the knots :lol:
Sexlightened
WELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was gonna nip to our local doggin site tonight but feck me :shock: u lot have got me paranoid so i'm off for an :arrow: intensive orienteering course :arrow: before i venture out again lol
then again .......i'm bloody horny so if i die ........TOUGH!!!!!
Andy xxx
then again .......i'm bloody
horny so if i die ........TOUGH!!!!!Andy xxx
Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
Well, where have you been then?? Fall down a hole in the woods?
He was busy releasing BeepBeep who was tied to a tree three days ago by Deancannock, but Single D had a few problems with the knots :lol:
i had no problems with the knobs
.....sorry mean knots. silly me 
: me naked, tied to tree, and there hobbling on the horizon, is Jumo, the Zen master of Dogging, with his silent approach zimmer frame. Oh the vision of bliss :shock:
bloody woods one track looks like the other i ended up near bloody yarmouth mr d 
i got fired at by the milatary too and yes those bomb holes are enormous dipity, u shud try and get out of them one day dipity :roll:
didnt see beepbeep tho he must av been up one of those big pine trees.
:swingingchair:
i got fired at by the milatary too and yes those bomb holes are enormous dipity, u shud try and get out of them one day dipity :roll: didnt see beepbeep tho he must av been up one of those big pine trees.
:swingingchair:
Sex God
You know Jomu, we never did get you the couple you wanted for your dogging trip out, maybe you will just have to come North
I thought I'd found them, in a cp at a local "new" town.
I was parked halfway down and waiting.....anyone coming in had to pass me (so I can 'ave a look in as they pass). Those not passing were silhouette by the streetlights.
In comes a motor and doesn't pass, but parks. The light illuminates a couple, the bloke stares at my motor, then they start the K&C movement, which rapidly changes to the K, G and D movement.
The woman climbs on the guy (in the driving seat..I know, gear levers and steering wheels.....) he pulls her dress above her waist (to about shoulder level) and starts the elevator movement (up and down), while practicing breast massage.
At this point I decided that it was proper to go over and watch......after about 10 minutes the window comes down (aha...A "get yer hands on these" request)...........
Instead the guy says "can I fuckin' 'elp yer"
(at this point it becomes obvious, even to a moron, that all is not what it should have been)
Instead of just shuffling into the night muttering apologies and genuflecting, I said (in a moment of complete insanity) "sorry mate, nice bum"
At which point he goes ballistic and gets out of the motor with just a shirt on and heads in my direction..............after nearly going into hysterics (the guy was wearing those big knee-high socks with turn-overs on the top), I decided he meant business and headed for the horizon.....only to remember my motor....by then he'd decided that driving after a laughing idiot was preferable to running after him without pants.....so I got the hell out fast.
After that I adopted the "visible walk-past" as the main modus operendi.....
I was parked halfway down and waiting.....anyone coming in had to pass me (so I can 'ave a look in as they pass). Those not passing were silhouette by the streetlights.
In comes a motor and doesn't pass, but parks. The light illuminates a couple, the bloke stares at my motor, then they start the K&C movement, which rapidly changes to the K, G and D movement.
The woman climbs on the guy (in the driving seat..I know, gear levers and steering wheels.....) he pulls her dress above her waist (to about shoulder level) and starts the elevator movement (up and down), while practicing breast massage.
At this point I decided that it was proper to go over and watch......after about 10 minutes the window comes down (aha...A "get yer hands on these" request)...........
Instead the guy says "can I fuckin' 'elp yer"
(at this point it becomes obvious, even to a moron, that all is not what it should have been)
Instead of just shuffling into the night muttering apologies and genuflecting, I said (in a moment of complete insanity) "sorry mate, nice bum"
At which point he goes ballistic and gets out of the motor with just a shirt on and heads in my direction..............after nearly going into hysterics (the guy was wearing those big knee-high socks with turn-overs on the top), I decided he meant business and headed for the horizon.....only to remember my motor....by then he'd decided that driving after a laughing idiot was preferable to running after him without pants.....so I got the hell out fast.
After that I adopted the "visible walk-past" as the main modus operendi.....
Sex God
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Your getting as bad as Mr D with your stories, :rotflmao: I can just imagine the guy chasing after you with THOSE socks on :rotflmao:
Sex God
Quote by Serendipity
I think that situation might actually qualify as an acceptable use of a mobile phone camera moment!!
Well the socks certainly would have
