Fancy meeting up tonight?
David
I am sensible, happy and clean
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male looking for cpl or fem tonight Hants/surrey/berks
fucking hell dave, its 11:45 pm 
top marks for your optomism though 
mrs dirty keeps dropping hints that she's in the mood for lurv tonight :cry: i'm fucking shitting myself :cry: the last thing i'm up for tonight it shagging that fanny of her's..trouble is, i've just had half of her rum away..she's gonna go mental when she finds out :shock: trouble is, i keep giggling..she thinks i'm in a good mood, and she's gotton herself all horny..i'm only laughing cause i'm pissed, yet sober enough to relise the shits gonna hit the fan when she twigs whats gone down..namely the level on her bottle of grog :lol: :lol: :cry: .. i just feel that i'll be creeping up the stairs in a while, then suddenly i'll hear "mine got! was iz this? mine pissen ezz missen..HALT! HALT! SWEINHUNT..COMMAS EEN HEREN!"... :shock: fuck..i've sobered up just thinking about it..bugger..it seemed funny a few minutes ago :cry:
top marks for your optomism though mrs dirty keeps dropping hints that she's in the mood for lurv tonight :cry: i'm fucking shitting myself :cry: the last thing i'm up for tonight it shagging that fanny of her's..trouble is, i've just had half of her rum away..she's gonna go mental when she finds out :shock: trouble is, i keep giggling..she thinks i'm in a good mood, and she's gotton herself all horny..i'm only laughing cause i'm pissed, yet sober enough to relise the shits gonna hit the fan when she twigs whats gone down..namely the level on her bottle of grog :lol: :lol: :cry: .. i just feel that i'll be creeping up the stairs in a while, then suddenly i'll hear "mine got! was iz this? mine pissen ezz missen..HALT! HALT! SWEINHUNT..COMMAS EEN HEREN!"... :shock: fuck..i've sobered up just thinking about it..bugger..it seemed funny a few minutes ago :cry: 
Warming the Bed
hell - optimism is great - must admit - i was thinking of popping out for a"nocturnal site seeing session tonight"....it too late?....esp if dirty doggers are invovled ! - love your full informative posts guys - but esp the pic!lol
anyways - basingstoke seems dead!
anyways - basingstoke seems dead!
Sex God
David, I really do hope you got sorted out even though it was a little late
Uncle D, you are so bad for my health, my sides are hurting after reading that post.
:rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Uncle D, you are so bad for my health, my sides are hurting after reading that post.
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: ahhhh, guys..thanks for the nice comments..whew, don't know what that drink consisted of, but i think i'm going through the menopause, and this is UNCLE dirty talking 
sorry i didn't get back to the fella that messaged, but i was bouncing off the walls shortly after posting..
it was a rough night..managed to get into bed before mrs dirty..looked in the mirror, and i swear i looked like "the joker"..that hooch of her's had embalmed me face and i'd got a fixed grin from ear to ear..got the booze from some little shanty town...some texan fella bought his partner a shot, she knocked it back and THUMP! she was prostrate..he reached out to her, and she shouted "fuck off, arsehole"
ops: that upset him :lol: apparently she'd never sworn before :lol: :lol:
anyway, i was well in the land of nod when i was shaken to my senses..awfull feeling that..is this casualty? are you in a club? what time is it?..then things click into sharp focus, and there she stands, in fishnet stockings, boots.."oh no" you think, and hope its all a bad dream...but it ain't :cry: at one point i thought i was going to have a heart attack..she sat on my face and i started to choke on her muff..my stiffled moans were taken for pleasure, and she bore down harder, shouting "ya ya"..i mean, she is slimline, but at six foot she ain't excactly managable..i think i must have lost conciousness at least a couple of times :shock:
ooh, just editing to let you know what we are up against..most of you will be thinking, "what sort of wimp are you dirty, why worry about having her rocket fuel away"? well, lads, i'll tell you..that is one evil fucker when it gets a strop on :cry: its the german genes..when we first started dating, nigh on twenty years ago, i took her to the horse races..not something i'm interested in, just that the oppertunity arose...anyway, one of the horses fell..didn't look particulary bad..but mrs dirty stands up and starts shouting "shoot it"..fucking hell, talk about embarrasing :oops: i said "sit down my dear, we don't shoot horses just for losing a race, this is england 1986, not berlin 1945"..some guy sat behind me said "here here" :lol: which didn't excactly help..but i swear i still have the scar on my forehead where the metal corner of her handbag caught me :lol: paperwork went everywhere..guess who had to crawl through the stands on all fours to retrieve it? :lol:
sorry i didn't get back to the fella that messaged, but i was bouncing off the walls shortly after posting..it was a rough night..managed to get into bed before mrs dirty..looked in the mirror, and i swear i looked like "the joker"..that hooch of her's had embalmed me face and i'd got a fixed grin from ear to ear..got the booze from some little shanty town...some texan fella bought his partner a shot, she knocked it back and THUMP! she was prostrate..he reached out to her, and she shouted "fuck off, arsehole"
ops: that upset him :lol: apparently she'd never sworn before :lol: :lol: anyway, i was well in the land of nod when i was shaken to my senses..awfull feeling that..is this casualty? are you in a club? what time is it?..then things click into sharp focus, and there she stands, in fishnet stockings, boots.."oh no" you think, and hope its all a bad dream...but it ain't :cry: at one point i thought i was going to have a heart attack..she sat on my face and i started to choke on her muff..my stiffled moans were taken for pleasure, and she bore down harder, shouting "ya ya"..i mean, she is slimline, but at six foot she ain't excactly managable..i think i must have lost conciousness at least a couple of times :shock:
ooh, just editing to let you know what we are up against..most of you will be thinking, "what sort of wimp are you dirty, why worry about having her rocket fuel away"? well, lads, i'll tell you..that is one evil fucker when it gets a strop on :cry: its the german genes..when we first started dating, nigh on twenty years ago, i took her to the horse races..not something i'm interested in, just that the oppertunity arose...anyway, one of the horses fell..didn't look particulary bad..but mrs dirty stands up and starts shouting "shoot it"..fucking hell, talk about embarrasing :oops: i said "sit down my dear, we don't shoot horses just for losing a race, this is england 1986, not berlin 1945"..some guy sat behind me said "here here" :lol: which didn't excactly help..but i swear i still have the scar on my forehead where the metal corner of her handbag caught me :lol: paperwork went everywhere..guess who had to crawl through the stands on all fours to retrieve it? :lol:
yeah, i'm laying off the rough stuff from now on..trouble is, i kinda decided to shed some weight..talking to those that know, it was suggested that the amber nectar was perhaps the greater culprit in contributing to my "decoy for the atlantic whaling fleet" appearance..it had to go..the good news was, i could substitute the hops for the grape, so long as it was white....its pacing myself i'm struggling with..the wine is fine, but either there ain't enough of it in the glass, or if consumed in the same measure as the ole stella..then it kinda puts yer lights out prematurely...imagine then introducing into the equasion "satan's hellfire" a drink so potent, the natives from which the drink was procured actually clear the drink of evil spirits before consuming it..i kinda forgot the ceromony hence the state i was in i've lost the weight, but the drink has caused some memory loss :cry: i can't gloat about no longer being a fat fucker, cause i don't remember being one ops:
hence the state i was in i've lost the weight, but the drink has caused some memory loss :cry: i can't gloat about no longer being a fat fucker, cause i don't remember being one ops: 