Not quite sure how long we have been on active on this Site - it was not that long after first joining, but I am sure that I remember when these forums were full of entertaining, enthralling and sometimes controversial threads. I remember seeing a thread start one morning and by the time I got home from work it was pages and pages long? What has happened? The forum activity seems to desperately short on active postings and those that are get the odd message or so meaning that you can be away a week, log back in and not much has really happened. Has the site lost its core membership and is just hanging on now? I am a member of another forum that represents a tiny single interest hobby group in this country (nothing sexual - a nerdy old mans hobby - don't ask) and it has to be ten times busier than this place now. Maybe I am looking back and imagining this place to be different to how it is now but I find myself logging on here less and less frequently and finding that nothing really is happening on the forums and so I leave it a little longer until the next time - and so on, and so on... Thoughts anyone? ... I will be back this time next year see if there has been an answer? :-)
As it happens TH I have been having the same thoughts in the last few days, although on a lot shorter timescale. I can't really remember what the forums were like a few years ago, I tended to skulk in the shadows back then. However, even as recent as two months ago the forums were busy, but they seem to have died a death since Christmas.
You're not alone TooHot. It's not just looking at how things used to be through the rose-tinted specs of nostalgia, the forum is dying on its arse, has been for some time IMO. It's a vicious circle isn't it: we all need some thing or some one to bounce off most often. Others post less so we have less to bounce off, that means others in their turn have less to bounce off themselves. Back in the old days there was a core membership who got each other and you knew you could leave lines dangling that others would pick up and chuck back and so on. There was humour aplenty that's been sorely lacking in such abundance for a while, those days are long gone. I've racked up nearly 2000 posts in 12 months on another forum I'm on, 600 odd since August on another. My posting boots are in fine fettle, trust me. Here I think it's partly boredom for old guard regs like ourselves, we've been here too long and seen it all before, partly that for a very long time the forums were less than welcoming of n00bs so we got fewer new members posting to replace those who fell by the wayside, partly that the cam chatrooms provide more in the way of instant gratification for many, and partly that the forums have been consistently buggered about with ever since The Cafe was first split into two ( or more? ) forums. I don't see a way back unfortunately. Sad.
I have to be honest and say that I have never known a forum especially a so called adult forum, where the banning of a thread or a warning of a banning of a thread is so easily used. I have said to admin I would not start a thread anymore as there are some here on occasions, hell bent on getting it locked, and I cannot really be arsed with that kind of crap. I personally am tired of saying anything controversial and then getting slapped down by a moderator on here, and yes I know they have a job to do on here, but feel that on many occasions it seems we are the children being given a slap on the wrist. There are many reasons I can think of that stops this forum from being good, and it certainly is not going to change from what it is now in the foreseeable future that I can see. For a ' membership ' as large as this ( 1,463,026 ), something is surely seriously wrong where this forum has about 20 regular posters if that. If the site owners were that bothered I am sure something over the last year would have happened. It is what it is.....a tiny forum with owners and members who really do not care about it as the posting figures now prove.
Quote by Star I have to be honest and say that I have never known a forum especially a so called adult forum, where the banning of a thread or a warning of a banning of a thread is so easily used. I have said to admin I would not start a thread anymore as there are some here on occasions, hell bent on getting it locked, and I cannot really be arsed with that kind of crap. I personally am tired of saying anything controversial and then getting slapped down by a moderator on here, and yes I know they have a job to do on here, but feel that on many occasions it seems we are the children being given a slap on the wrist.
Rubbish. Star, it's not what you say half the time ( as in the topic ), it's how you say it. You can't help yourself at times. Controversial topics are fine, we've always had them but you have to deal with them using appropriate language, and be able to take others' disagreement on the chin, not as a personal affront. Sometimes you and others members seem to have a difficulty there. That's what gets slapped down, in my view rightly, and there is less of it than you suggest. A lot less. Please note, in no way did I just single you out there, OK?
Quote by Flower Neil mentioned people who "got" each other and there were times when you could post something totally surreal and have an even more surreal response within minutes but all of those people got banned.
All? You sure? I don't think so, not by a long stretch is this even remotely true Flower. I'm not sure who you might have in mind here but I think very few people have actually been banned IIRC, fewer than could account for the change on the forum?
Quote by Flower Once you have the idea in your head that some moderators are poor fragile souls with little understanding of reality and no sense of humour and that they will make it a mission to ban people they don`t like, it`s tricky to shift it.
Disagree here too. You remember Blue and Jags I take it? In no sense were these humourless people but I think you'd struggle to find more stringent moderation than we got from them. Neither suffered fools gladly. They were here when the site was at its most active, didn't seem to cause the issue you're hinting at back then, at all? If anything the moderation is really quite loose on here, CA was left pretty much to go its own way until things got really out of hand and the personal abuse kicked off with complaints being made.
Quote by Flower There is also the issue with consistantly abusive people who do everything they possibly can to cause fights and then threaten to have people banned when they answer back.
This may be true. ;) Anyways, I don't think moderation is the issue. Don't think the thread needs to go to far down that road, it may begin to look as though there are axes being ground. The forum's deathly quiet is for the reasons I outlined in my original post I think, not these.
I think neil has hit the nail on the head with his reference to buggering about with the forum titles. The CA was, in my very humble opinion, the best iteration - separated from the cafe - because it very clearly delineated the type of bear pit forumites were entering. Whilst not everyone contributed, the number of people who observed the goings on without daring to abandon hope gave the forum it's popularity. The current version 'fancy a chat' rather suggests something to do with the chat rooms and since few chat roomers tend to venture into the forum, there is little encouragement to do so with the current nomenclature. NOTE TO ADMIN: please can we have the CA back? NOTE TO FLOWER: I posted 2 minutes before you did
Quote by neilinleeds I have to be honest and say that I have never known a forum especially a so called adult forum, where the banning of a thread or a warning of a banning of a thread is so easily used. I have said to admin I would not start a thread anymore as there are some here on occasions, hell bent on getting it locked, and I cannot really be arsed with that kind of crap. I personally am tired of saying anything controversial and then getting slapped down by a moderator on here, and yes I know they have a job to do on here, but feel that on many occasions it seems we are the children being given a slap on the wrist.
Rubbish. Star, it's not what you say half the time ( as in the topic ), it's how you say it. You can't help yourself at times. Controversial topics are fine, we've always had them but you have to deal with them using appropriate language, and be able to take others' disagreement on the chin, not as a personal affront. Sometimes you and others members seem to have a difficulty there. That's what gets slapped down, in my view rightly, and there is less of it than you suggest. A lot less. Please note, in no way did I just single you out there, OK?
Quote by Flower Neil mentioned people who "got" each other and there were times when you could post something totally surreal and have an even more surreal response within minutes but all of those people got banned.
All? You sure? I don't think so, not by a long stretch is this even remotely true Flower. I'm not sure who you might have in mind here but I think very few people have actually been banned IIRC, fewer than could account for the change on the forum?
Quote by Flower Once you have the idea in your head that some moderators are poor fragile souls with little understanding of reality and no sense of humour and that they will make it a mission to ban people they don`t like, it`s tricky to shift it.
Disagree here too.You remember Blue and Jags I take it? In no sense were these humourless people but I think you'd struggle to find more stringent moderation than we got from them. Neither suffered fools gladly. They were here when the site was at its most active, didn't seem to cause the issue you're hinting at back then, at all? If anything the moderation is really quite loose on here, CA was left pretty much to go its own way until things got really out of hand and the personal abuse kicked off with complaints being made.
Quote by Flower There is also the issue with consistantly abusive people who do everything they possibly can to cause fights and then threaten to have people banned when they answer back.
This may be true. ;) Anyways, I don't think moderation is the issue. Don't think the thread needs to go to far down that road, it may begin to look as though there are axes being ground. The forum's deathly quiet is for the reasons I outlined in my original post I think, not these. :thumbup: Especially the bold bit.... 2 stricter Moderators you couldn't wish to meet yet the forum was a place to be....
If I were freckledbird or jags, I guess I would have been correcting Steve on his "2 stricter..." to "2 more strict..." :lol2: Having said that, Steve was himself a respected ChatOp under the old guard and speaks with some experience of these matters I don't remember Blue though.... Perhaps it's because I didn't cross swords there.
Quote by GnV I think neil has hit the nail on the head with his reference to buggering about with the forum titles. The CA was, in my very humble opinion, the best iteration - separated from the cafe - because it very clearly delineated the type of bear pit forumites were entering. Whilst not everyone contributed, the number of people who observed the goings on without daring to abandon hope gave the forum it's popularity. The current version 'fancy a chat' rather suggests something to do with the chat rooms and since few chat roomers tend to venture into the forum, there is little encouragement to do so with the current nomenclature. NOTE TO ADMIN: please can we have the CA back? NOTE TO FLOWER: I posted 2 minutes before you did
I'm in total agreement with you ( and Neil) on this. In virtually all the time I have been a member of SH, it's been an oft repeated complaint that the forum isn't what it used to be but it does appear to be at an all time low right now. Forums require a supply of new posters to keep them fresh but they appear to be in very short supply. I could be wrong but it seems as though most of the regulars still posting are long term and therefore non paying members. Coincidence? There was a tiny minority of members that incessantly called for the removal of the CA forum and its rather ironic that one in particular has been noticeably absent since the new forums came into being!
Well i have been here a while (2005) and although there is maybe less movement in the forums it is still the same as it was always .... some interesting people and some boring rude people who are up their own arses and who drive most others way if they ever dare to read/post in the forums lol, well thats my opinion anyway I tend to read the forums occasionally but like most of my friends here, i rarely post here but i do post on other sites, both swinging and other interests as i find the other sites users less aggresive nd more interesting. It's a shame as there are some lovely interesting people here but most of them avoid the forums like the plague !!
We've been members for almost 4 years now. No where near as long as many of the regular forumites but long enough to rack up a fair few posts. I have to admit that even after over 3000 posts I still don't feel like a regular. When I started using the forum there where the cafe, CA and JFF forums. I personally thought that worked well. You would get regulars and new posters in each and some people who dipped in and out of each. I rarely used the CA forum as it was constantly full of heated debates, arguments and quite a lot of bickering and quite personal comments. That's not what I go into a forum for. JFF and the cafe were much friendlier and inviting. You could have a laugh, a flirt and lots of friendly banter. In short, people were made to feel welcome. When the cafe and JFF merged, in my opinion, that's when the friendliness stopped. There were so many threads complaining about other threads and 'dullard' threads that people just stopped posting as much in the cafe .... About anything! Of course the heated threads in the CA continued. With the recent restructure, all of the heat from the CA is now in the 'fancy a chat' forum. I honestly don't blame people for not posting. Especially those new to the forum. It is so uninviting, unfriendly and full of personal comments. I check the forum every day but rarely post. The bitchiness is something that I personally don't want to get involved in. In my opinion, while people display such aggressive and personal behaviour the forum will continue to struggle.
Quote by Funlovers2009 We've been members for almost 4 years now. No where near as long as many of the regular forumites but long enough to rack up a fair few posts. I have to admit that even after over 3000 posts I still don't feel like a regular. When I started using the forum there where the cafe, CA and JFF forums. I personally thought that worked well. You would get regulars and new posters in each and some people who dipped in and out of each. I rarely used the CA forum as it was constantly full of heated debates, arguments and quite a lot of bickering and quite personal comments. That's not what I go into a forum for. JFF and the cafe were much friendlier and inviting. You could have a laugh, a flirt and lots of friendly banter. In short, people were made to feel welcome. When the cafe and JFF merged, in my opinion, that's when the friendliness stopped. There were so many threads complaining about other threads and 'dullard' threads that people just stopped posting as much in the cafe .... About anything! Of course the heated threads in the CA continued. With the recent restructure, all of the heat from the CA is now in the 'fancy a chat' forum. I honestly don't blame people for not posting. Especially those new to the forum. It is so uninviting, unfriendly and full of personal comments. I check the forum every day but rarely post. The bitchiness is something that I personally don't want to get involved in. In my opinion, while people display such aggressive and personal behaviour the forum will continue to struggle.
The forums are as dead as ever I have known, long gone are the days of multiple tabs and pressing F5 in an attempt to keep up with a multitude of very fast moving threads. They lost a lot (most) of the very regular posters following the sell out and have gradually been declining in quality and quantity (imo) since then. Prior to this the cafe had mostly been about having a laugh. The sort of political threads that the CA section catered for were definitely in a minority. There were still fallouts but these happened mostly by accident rather than design. Although a good internet ruck makes fascinating reading for the uninvolved, just like looking at a car crash, it's probably not healthy, and that is all the CA type threads consist of. Why would any but the committed warrior join in them but unfortunately there is very little else to post on. "Loose the sniping and bring back the fun."
I've not been around much lately but for me it is nothing to do with site or forum, and everything to do with 'real life' (for want of a better phrase) being busy. I think the merging of the forums was to try and engender debate and interaction. Things aren't done to deliberately annoy folk and I can't remember the last time I locked a thread or banned someone in the forum But hey, I'm up for a chat tonight if anyone else is :rascal: x
I believe the mix of the forums has killed it. Years ago I used to write threads, covering all topics from emotive, sexually, politic and fun topics. I felt there used to be a good input with people giving their opinions on all sorts of subjects, could have a laugh and ask for sexual advice. I value peoples opinions, some posters used to really make me think and it was a place I would ask for opinions, advice and generally enjoy being around. Sadly there have always been those that like to put others down, without giving their opinion but prefer to attack. There is a art of debate and giving opinions. Personally attacking and just wanting to personally criticise others for me isn't a pleasant place to be. A few years ago a couple of people even took this over to private messaging me which led me to give up being bothered to write threads here anymore. I still look into the forums and I still see personal attacks still seems what some use it for. Something that I personally never do. I would rather share thoughts opinions and a laugh. I have often thought about writing threads again. I have started and then thought what is the point. It often feels like a battle ground in here and not a welcoming place to be. Very sad really. I would like to see the forums split again so there is a place for everyone again and the parts you don't like you don't need to enter.
Absolutely northwest-cpl, the malaise for me goes back to take-over and the loss of a lot of what had been the core forum regs but that's a very long time ago, most posters on here wouldn't even remember how it was, they joined later so it's not the whole story. Probably is for us though. Something I've always railed against is the perry bitching and the tendency to jump all over other posters, especially n00bs. It was always so obviously detrimental to the long term success of the site, no matter how big the ego's pay-off in fleetingly being right on the internets over something inconsequential showing someone else to be a bit of a dick on this or that maybe hadn't through things through in the grand scheme of things went. That was always a problem as I remember it but as a free site where you could bugger off and reinvent yourself with a new identity at will if you'd been a bit of a twat and rightly shown the error of your ways it just doesn't happen with a paid-for site. And let's face it, new paying members ain't signing up for the prospect of some sparkling wit and repartee on the forums are they, they just wanna get laid quick as possible and as many times as possible before their membership runs out? Why bother putting the time and energy so many used to put into it just keep themselves, and hopefully others entertained with complete fucking bollox. Even I've forgotten how to do that any more, I wish I had the creative juices left in me. Copious quantities of Stella had a lot to do with the creative juices, obviously, as everyone well knew, I made no secret of the technique.
Time to bring back the goldfish Neil. When the forums were at their height the chat room (singular) had 120 people in at its very busiest, usually far less than that and no cams. At busy times now the chat rooms have upwards of a 1000. It's obvious where most people that want to interact using pixels are spending their time now. Why get involved in a forum arguement when you can watch tits?
Everyone has godlike status. Almost all the posting are the same people, making new faces think long and hard before posting replies. Why post a response when you already know who and what the reply will be.
Quote by robbo-bi1 Everyone has godlike status. Almost all the posting are the same people, making new faces think long and hard before posting replies. Why post a response when you already know who and what the reply will be.
I didn't know what you were implying ....My crystal ball is in for repair at the moment :-) and I'm afraid you've fallen flat on your arse as the first 2 posts in this thread are not from posters with a Godlike status (which incidently only means they have made over a certain number of posts) ...
Point proven ????? I know what the status means and am aware that most posting are by the same people. Those that are new may not understand this and some do indeed see it as a status not to be toyed with. They then decide discretion is the better part of valour...............
Quote by robbo-bi1 Point proven ????? I know what the status means and am aware that most posting are by the same people. Those that are new may not understand this and some do indeed see it as a status not to be toyed with. They then decide discretion is the better part of valour...............
You took my original post as an attack, though it clearly wasn't. It was pointing out what new faces see when reading the forums. You became sarcastic, and if I were new,then maybe would have just left this thread and all future ones well alone.
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, something is surely seriously wrong where this forum has about 20 regular posters if that. If the site owners were that bothered I am sure something over the last year would have happened. It is what it is.....a tiny forum with owners and members who really do not care about it as the posting figures now prove.
