I thought I would ask the question as someone raised it in another thread.
Is marriage still highly thought of ?
I have often asked myself this question being married 25 years I believe it is important.
I believe it is more about commitment than the word marriage and that commitment was between my husband and myself set up together w ell before we were married as we were together 8 years prior to getting married.
The commitment was to work, support and provide together and to sacrifice something of ourselves when the time came to have children. As we believe having children you have to sacrifice something to gain something more desirable between you and that was to produce children together and commit to them.
Although not religious I do believe in my marriage although I see it as a commitment that we shared together and knowing the sacrifices we were both happy to make in the future and both adhered to those, which was and still is the commitment to work, support and provide together.
So in a way I we saw it as a contract between us two. It didn’t matter to us what others thought around us but keeping focused on what we agreed together, which was the case people would always have an opinion.
I don’t believe marriage can survive on just love. The love is the driving force behind the commitment but it is the commitment that can last as things happen to question the love.
This is just my opinion of what marriage means.
What does marriage mean is it just a word?
Should the word be changed?
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Is marriage still highly thought of?
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Sex God
Marriage has many threads to it. Many marriages were brokered to ensure the transfer of land and property from one man to another. The female having minimal say in the matter and was just a vehicle for the transfer. Her later safety and well being being often ignored completely so long as she produced the requisite male heirs - and that's not just the royals either.
In other cases and times it is a loving union between 2 people in the presence of their friends and family and for some of them, in the eyes of some god or other.
I agree that 'love' alone (how to define that for a start?) cannot support a marriage, that commitment is needed. But some take it too far - I'm all for sticking together through some thick and thin - but when it becomes toxic or just mind numbingly boring there is no value in keeping a dead thing alive.
What gets me is how easy it is to get married and how hard it is to get divorced - especially for the woman, who has traditionally given up her name and has to pay and jump through goodness knows what hoops to reclaim it. I feel that both parties should automatically keep their names or pay to join them with a hyphen, that marriage should require as much legal wrangling as getting divorced (or as little) and people should accept that a lot of relationships simply die after a period of time, regardless of the earlier hopes and wishes of the people involved.
In other cases and times it is a loving union between 2 people in the presence of their friends and family and for some of them, in the eyes of some god or other.
I agree that 'love' alone (how to define that for a start?) cannot support a marriage, that commitment is needed. But some take it too far - I'm all for sticking together through some thick and thin - but when it becomes toxic or just mind numbingly boring there is no value in keeping a dead thing alive.
What gets me is how easy it is to get married and how hard it is to get divorced - especially for the woman, who has traditionally given up her name and has to pay and jump through goodness knows what hoops to reclaim it. I feel that both parties should automatically keep their names or pay to join them with a hyphen, that marriage should require as much legal wrangling as getting divorced (or as little) and people should accept that a lot of relationships simply die after a period of time, regardless of the earlier hopes and wishes of the people involved.
Marriage.........the joining of this man and this woman, well for now anyways. 
In all seriousness it is to one person, what it is not to another. Marriage now leads in my opinion too easily to divorce. In my Grand Daughters class over half the kids parents are divorced or separated. Certainly not a good advert for it?
I have some old fashioned views on it and a few up to date views. A point that Foxy made in her reply with regards to women changing their names is a choice. It is not a part of marriage laws nor is it a law at all, it is something that a woman does for in today's world an old fashioned reason. It makes things awkward as well for kids, when little Johny has his Fathers surname, and then his Mother either reverts back to her pre married name, or remarry s and takes her new Husbands name. It would be better if the name you was born with is the name you keep.
I think marriage is a wonderful thing to want to commit too, but then living with someone in a stable relationship, has the same meanings about it. A few years ago there was a financial benefit to getting married with tax allowances as well, and I am sure many people got married for those extra financial rewards in the mans pay packet. Today however that is not the case and it would seem that second marriages are on the increase even though the first marriage failed. That has to say something about the institution of marriage surely?
For a lot of people getting married changes very little. Yes they usually change their names and yes they get a nice certificate and possibly a bit of a party after wards, but in today's Britain it means very little else. Living together means the same in law as getting married, so some would say what is the point then? Marriage to many people is still a sign of commitment more so than just living together, and I am a believer of bringing children into this world whilst being married. See old fashioned views popping up again.
Like many things in life, it suits some and does not suit others. Is divorce on the increase does anyone know?
In all seriousness it is to one person, what it is not to another. Marriage now leads in my opinion too easily to divorce. In my Grand Daughters class over half the kids parents are divorced or separated. Certainly not a good advert for it?
I have some old fashioned views on it and a few up to date views. A point that Foxy made in her reply with regards to women changing their names is a choice. It is not a part of marriage laws nor is it a law at all, it is something that a woman does for in today's world an old fashioned reason. It makes things awkward as well for kids, when little Johny has his Fathers surname, and then his Mother either reverts back to her pre married name, or remarry s and takes her new Husbands name. It would be better if the name you was born with is the name you keep.
I think marriage is a wonderful thing to want to commit too, but then living with someone in a stable relationship, has the same meanings about it. A few years ago there was a financial benefit to getting married with tax allowances as well, and I am sure many people got married for those extra financial rewards in the mans pay packet. Today however that is not the case and it would seem that second marriages are on the increase even though the first marriage failed. That has to say something about the institution of marriage surely?
For a lot of people getting married changes very little. Yes they usually change their names and yes they get a nice certificate and possibly a bit of a party after wards, but in today's Britain it means very little else. Living together means the same in law as getting married, so some would say what is the point then? Marriage to many people is still a sign of commitment more so than just living together, and I am a believer of bringing children into this world whilst being married. See old fashioned views popping up again.
Like many things in life, it suits some and does not suit others. Is divorce on the increase does anyone know?
I think my attitude has changed over time and I do wish I never relinquished my maiden Name. If I had my time again I would prefer it being part of my children's name.
I also have wondered if in today's society and how times have changed if I would still get married. I have friends that have been together 21 years unmarried and have two teenage sons. One had issues in understand why his parents never got married and often use to ask them why they would they never got married and if they would ever commit and get married to each other. He also said to his mum it felt odd he had his dad's name and his mum has her own name.
Which made me wonder the children view of things.
I also have wondered if in today's society and how times have changed if I would still get married. I have friends that have been together 21 years unmarried and have two teenage sons. One had issues in understand why his parents never got married and often use to ask them why they would they never got married and if they would ever commit and get married to each other. He also said to his mum it felt odd he had his dad's name and his mum has her own name.
Which made me wonder the children view of things.
Sex God
I like being married and I like saying I'm married and I like the fat we've been married for nearly 20 years and neither of us have previous spouses - Yup I like marriage
Being happily married requires some amount of work, for some it's a bit too much work but for me, well I like/lurve being married, it's been ace since day one and continues to be so over a decade on (been together 16yrs) I miss him when he's not home, I miss contact with him when he's out and from what he tells me it's the same for him, it's just as much fun now as it was then. To marry required a good amount of commitment from both of us to each other, we chose our own vows,married with family and friends around and recently had a shindig inviting all that were at our original wedding back to our house for a ten year turn up and they all turned up just as they did ten years ago. I like carrying my husbands name, I'm proud to be by his side as his wife, it feels good, I like it and wouldn't change it any point.
Sex God
Quote by nellie-mwgc
It depends who you're married to i supose
My first marriage wasn't to good (apart from having 2 wonderful children from it) but my second is fantastic :)
id agree with that
Master of Sex
Marriage does not a commitment make.
But once I have the later, I'll sign any paper for a massive party, THE BLING, the honeymoon, and an excuse to wear a barbie dress..
But once I have the later, I'll sign any paper for a massive party, THE BLING, the honeymoon, and an excuse to wear a barbie dress..
