Am I the only one confused by profiles where the person/people cannot accommodate, won't meet in a hotel and cannot travel? What are the options remaining? Not many that i can think of: car sex, outdoor sex or hoping that someone very local can accommodate. It certainly puts me off of contacting someone so restricted. Am I the only one? Are there too many question in this post? Was that last one not needed? Or that one?
I wouldn't bother thinking about it - some people are just cranks.
Quote by martin_bcfc
Am I the only one confused by profiles where the person/people cannot accommodate, won't meet in a hotel and cannot travel? What are the options remaining? Not many that i can think of: car sex, outdoor sex or hoping that someone very local can accommodate. It certainly puts me off of contacting someone so restricted. Am I the only one? Are there too many question in this post? Was that last one not needed? Or that one?
Sadly an awful lot of people here just can't be bothered to check profiles let alone complete their own properly. A good tip is not to waste time on them but concentrate on those who put more effort into communicating what they do/don't want and can/can't offer so you can make an informed decision what to do next.
Quote by E4systreet
I'm so pleased that's been brought up . It's baffling
It's called laziness lol Seriously though, we now live in an age when many people expect to get a good return with minimal effort - click, swipe right, get the ideal partner(s), done! Computers have facilitated that and AI is making it even harder to discern who we are really dealing with. For those who don't care that might be fine but for the rest of us it represents a problem.
This should be easily fixable by Site Development - make fields mandatory before you can submit your profile.
Another way to gauge suspect profiles, where people are posting messages on the person's wall and not a single like or reply. Why would you not interact with messages posted on your profile ??
My other bug bear is people not putting where in the country they are on their profile. It's exceedingly unlikely I'd be willing to travel from the West Country to Aberdeen for a meeting for example so why would I even make contact in the first place.
Quote by martin_bcfc
My other bug bear is people not putting where in the country they are on their profile. It's exceedingly unlikely I'd be willing to travel from the West Country to Aberdeen for a meeting for example so why would I even make contact in the first place.
I think the only safe assumption there is that they don't want people to know where they are... and if that puts some people off contacting them, that may be deliberate.
I know a fair number of people who don't give their exact locations, for a variety of reasons: Privacy (they may not want to confirm the neighbours suspicions!) also for some reason, some people think that all that's required for people to want to meet them is for them to know they are close by! I've never seen the sense in this, after all proximity does not imply attraction, but some people seem to think it does.
Quote by Gts
This should be easily fixable by Site Development - make fields mandatory before you can submit your profile.
It could indeed be 'fixed' if it were desirable, but some people do not wish to complete those segments of their profiles, that's no reason to exclude them from setting up a profile on the site.
Quote by Gts
Another way to gauge suspect profiles, where people are posting messages on the person's wall and not a single like or reply. Why would you not interact with messages posted on your profile ??
Simply because some people don't want to- it doesn't automatically make that profile "suspect"
Quote by Lapua
It could indeed be 'fixed' if it were desirable, but some people do not wish to complete those segments of their profiles, that's no reason to exclude them from setting up a profile on the site.
So making the site the absolute best it can be, is not in the site owners interests and not in the interests of it's users?
I mean, ok, if that's about the size of it.
I still fail to understand why some of the accounts have only a modicum of information filled in. I looked at one recently after they looked at my profile and see theirs was set up 15 years ago but still has barely anything filled in. Nothing about what they're looking for or about themselves, no reply to messages posted on their profile, no indication of where they are, no photos etc. How is that supposed to attract attention? I'm guessing they're not gold members as it would be pointless paying if all they do is look at other people's profiles.
Maybe I'm just overthinking it and making the mistake of trying to understand other people!
Quote by martin_bcfc
I still fail to understand why some of the accounts have only a modicum of information filled in. I looked at one recently after they looked at my profile and see theirs was set up 15 years ago but still has barely anything filled in. Nothing about what they're looking for or about themselves, no reply to messages posted on their profile, no indication of where they are, no photos etc. How is that supposed to attract attention? I'm guessing they're not gold members as it would be pointless paying if all they do is look at other people's profiles.
Maybe I'm just overthinking it and making the mistake of trying to understand other people!
People join for a multitude of reasons, some on a whim, some because they are curious and even some who intend to actually meet.
Forcing people to fill out their profiles with exact details etc is not really the way to go, to encourage people to join or even stay, not to mention how would the "readers" know that the profile is actually true and not just made up in order to satisfy other people.
In an ideal world, just by joining a swinging site would guarantee you a meet, with who you are looking for but unfortunately we don't live in that world.
People have free will and should be able to use that will, in which ever way they choose.
The only thing that is sort of "forced" on the new members is the need to fill out their profile with at least 1o words.
Some actually fill it out with details etc and some with just random words in order to fulfil the ten words needed.
Quote by Gts
So making the site the absolute best it can be, is not in the site owners interests and not in the interests of it's users?
I mean, ok, if that's about the size of it.
Making the site "the best it can be"
Admin could insist that every profile be filled in and that every profile must image verify within a certain time frame which in my opinion would be a great idea and maybe stop some of the "fake" profiles, but just how many would actually do it, most would refuse and just leave I believe.
With the introduction of AI now being a massive part of everything, we are finding lots of "scammers" and even unfortunately our long standing members, trying to use AI.
Please do not be tempted to use AI folks as it may cause a restriction on your account is my words of wisdom as we have ways of detecting it.
When a profile is reported to admin as being "suspect". it is reviewed a multitude of ways and may even be asked to Image verify in order to ally the suspect fears.
But just by having a feeling that something isn't as it seems or a profile isn't filled in, is only a feeling and not actual proof.
I have been a mod on this site for a long long time and I would like to think I have saw and heard it all but even I am still taken aback by some of the reports of a suspect profile.
But on the subject of "iffy" profiles, I have lost count of the number of times a profile , clearly of a "scammer" before we even get to deal with it,20 or 30 odd men have either friended it or at the very least followed it, WTF folks!
When a profile clearly states that a 22 year old gorgeous female, wanting to talk off site and is contacting a shall we say "out of shape" guy in his 50', 60's or even 70's, it is clearly a red flag.🙄
But I digress.
Admin are always open to ideas that make the site better and if you have any then use the support link and tell them your ideas.
Quote by Gts
So making the site the absolute best it can be, is not in the site owners interests and not in the interests of it's users?
I mean, ok, if that's about the size of it.
I was trying to make the point that's only 'best' in your view, not necessarily best for everyone- as people we all tend to assume everyone else thinks like we do and more often than not, we're wrong. I think you've conflated your view of what making the site the best it could be for you, with the best it can be for the most people at the same time.
As the old phrase goes, you can please some of the people all of the time, or all of the people some of the time, but not all the people all of the time.
Quote by martin_bcfc
I still fail to understand why some of the accounts have only a modicum of information filled in. I looked at one recently after they looked at my profile and see theirs was set up 15 years ago but still has barely anything filled in. Nothing about what they're looking for or about themselves, no reply to messages posted on their profile, no indication of where they are, no photos etc. How is that supposed to attract attention? I'm guessing they're not gold members as it would be pointless paying if all they do is look at other people's profiles.
Maybe I'm just overthinking it and making the mistake of trying to understand other people!
I think you're on the right track with that last bit!
Certainly for women and to a (slightly!) lesser extent couples, they really don't have to work too hard to get a lot of attention and then have the luxury of being "picky" with who they get back to.
You ask the question: "How is that meant to attract attention?" two observations from me- 1) perhaps it isn't. it really could be that simple. 2) It STILL got your attention! sometimes the best way to intrigue a human is to give them a little bit of information and then let their curiosity do the rest.
I don't expect people to always put where exactly they live but at least the county they're in would determine whether they're worth making contact with or not.
Quote by martin_bcfc
I don't expect people to always put where exactly they live but at least the county they're in would determine whether they're worth making contact with or not.
And here in lies the point - you're either up for meetings, in which case it's not unreasonable to expect location to be mandatory or you're not, in which case a check box on the profile that disables location information and sets a flag that a profile isn't up for meeting.
Quote by martin_bcfc
I don't expect people to always put where exactly they live but at least the county they're in would determine whether they're worth making contact with or not.
Some people might join because they want to meet at the time and others may join because they are unsure and want to see what the site and it's members have to offer.
Some join on a whim and some are egar to get started on their swinging journey,and least of all some join out of curiosity.
I know of people who have never put their location and been avid swingers and on the other hand,people who have put their location because they want to see what's on offer near them but yet never swing.
And how,Just By ticking a location,would it distinguish between them all exactly!
