Absurd Inventions

2 Nov 2004

Quote by Vix
OK then - to save the valuable resource that is tiolet paper from being over used... how about an invention of something to stop your poo making a ploppy splash noise when it falls into the water, in a public loo (like at work, say) ? Or, to use at home when you've just gotta go but are on the phone?
Oh, come on... I bet all the girls, at least, have stuffed 10 ton of bog roll in the loo to stop this happening at some point. No? Just me then? That'd be right.

Nope you're not the only one. I have done this in the past.
I have to say I try really hard not to poo unless I'm at home. The resulting stomach aches can be incredibly painful when away for a weekend. (How fucking stupid am I rolleyes

)
Jas
XXX

2 Nov 2004

Quote by Re-Lapse
An invisible barrier that I could switch on around my bike when it's parked outside my house, so if anyone else knocks it over and leaves it, they are attacked by a special beam that makes their nuts go rusty and fall off.

Why do you assume that it is only men who drive carlessly?( rusty nuts, ow)
A bleedin woman knocked over my blade whilst she was reversing.
She fucked off quick time.
mad

:x
Why do you assume I meant 'testicles' when I said 'nuts'? AFAIK, the former do not go rusty!

2 Nov 2004

Quote by Jas-Tim
I have to say I try really hard not to poo unless I'm at home. The resulting stomach aches can be incredibly painful when away for a weekend. (How fucking stupid am I )
Jas
XXX

LOL, ok then... I don't have to try not to.. I can't unless I am at home, these days. Must be a psychological block (!) or summat, but I have been known to go away for a fortnight and still..... no go :cry:
Now it is TMI, innit?

2 Nov 2004

Quote by fruity1976
I would invent........
Amachine that makes women right only some of the time.
That's because women are right all the time :shock:

A machine to convince men that women are wrong (cause we're alaways right!) lol

If a man stands alone in a forest, open's his mouth and speaks......
Is he still wrong?

7 Nov 2004

:idea: Now the colder weather's upon us I feel we need a device akin to magnetic fish tank cleaners. You know the one's where you fit a squeegy device to the inside of the glass and move it around with a magnet from the outside?
I feel it could easily be adapted for the dogging community. The action could continue unabaited inside the car whilst the dogger de-mists the windows from the outside. wink

If the device should catch on we'd need to give it a catchy name - perhaps in honour of someone from this forum? Any nominations?

7 Nov 2004

You've got Mobile phones with a vidration controll
so what about a dildo that can send text messages!!!!!
it'll redefine the word text sex
JGL
ps. i have already sent of the pantents just incase some things about it!

14 Nov 2004

Just had a belter of a stupid idea!!
TATOOS FOR BLIND PEOPLE!!! lol

14 Nov 2004

Quote by fruity1976
Is there such a thing as an orgy machine!!?? Jesus imagine there was and you used it and it malfunctioned!! :cry:

Wasn't there 'The Orgasmatron' featured in a Woody Allen film (Sleeper ?) ? And of course, it did malfunction.