Thanks for reading - my dilemma is whether to suggest a first-time swap or not. I've been with my partner for 15 years, and have no plans for that to change - however due in large part to poorly controlled anxiety and inability to relax on my part, let's just say that physically things have never been better than basic. I'm convinced that with another man my partner would have developed her sexual "self" much more. I think that it's no more than she deserves to have an experience with someone skilled who can perform in a way she has never experienced with me - and it also happens to be a powerful fantasy of mine (possibly because of these issues) to allow her to have a full experience with another man (not to be present, as I doubt she'd be comfortable with that, but to be in the same house at least). The question is, should I suggest this or not? If made, the suggestion would be from way leftfield from her point of view. She might of course have no desire to "explore". The idea is not as a relationship saver, as we're not in that particular place, but partly to give her the option of having her cake and eating it after years of mediocre at best, and partly because admittedly the idea is exciting to me. If so, and if she were to be keen, what is the best way to go about arranging it - is it best to seek a single man, or to seek a couple, in the circumstances?
Any views gratefully received . . . .
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Advice - to suggest or not to suggest . . . .
I think the best thing to do would be to just approach your partner about your thoughts in an honest and open way. At the end of the day if she's not interested then any other comments about what the better first time experience would be aren't really necessary.
If she is interested, see what she wants and then start advertising accordingly. Apologies if the advice seems over simplified but its what I'd do in your position.
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do
If she is interested, see what she wants and then start advertising accordingly. Apologies if the advice seems over simplified but its what I'd do in your position.
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do
Sex God
You know her better than we do - ask her.
Sounds like it's your fantasy and not something you've discussed with her, even though you've worded it more carefully than other men who have asked for similar advice on this forum.
If she likes the idea, place an ad or a post in 'Let's Meet Up'.
Sounds like it's your fantasy and not something you've discussed with her, even though you've worded it more carefully than other men who have asked for similar advice on this forum.
If she likes the idea, place an ad or a post in 'Let's Meet Up'.
Why not ask her what she thinks about swinging? does she know anything about it?
As far as you being mediocre, maybe thats just what you think. Maybe you are all she needs and wants.
As far as fantasy's go, does she have any? have you asked her what hers are? maybe they could be the same. Communication is the key. Good luck.
louise xx
As far as you being mediocre, maybe thats just what you think. Maybe you are all she needs and wants.
As far as fantasy's go, does she have any? have you asked her what hers are? maybe they could be the same. Communication is the key. Good luck.
louise xx
