I've just been reading a thread started by 'charles', in which he's reluctant to reveal his location ("a small conservative town"), and in another thread, DeniseBabe is regretting her choice of username now that google finds her posts here.
I don't have this problem, because I was very cautious when I joined, I picked a fairly unidentifiable username (my second name doesn't even begin with 'D' for those chatroom users who know me as 'Mr_D'), and I obscured my exact details a bit - if people asked me where I live, I've either given a very broad response, or if I'm interested in meeting at some stage I've namde somewhere that's not actually where I live, but is as near as makes no difference, and Ivel varied my age by a year in either direction at random, my height by an inch or two either way and so on.
I'm not intending to mislead anyone, I just want to be able to say to someone not on the site 'oh that can't be me, look, this and that are different'. I'm only comfortable admitting this now that I've 'settled in' to the site and trust the people here.
What do other people on the site think of me doing this? Wise precaution or unnacceptable deceit? Are you doing it too?
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An Acceptible Level of Misdirection?
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Sex God
Quote by Mister_Discreet
if people asked me where I live, I've either given a very broad response, or if I'm interested in meeting at some stage I've namde somewhere that's not actually where I live, but is as near as makes no difference,
well as i dont drive... i would be a bit pissed of if i have travelled to meet you and then recieved a phone call saying... hahahaha.. i dont live their really!!!!!
Quote by Mister_Discreet
and Ivel varied my age by a year in either direction at random, my height by an inch or two either way and so on.,
the age thing might only be an issue with someone who has a very strict age range,,,,,if you were on the boundery and it was only you "lie" that got you in with a chance.. i dont think its a big deal really though. as for the hieght.......i think that MIGHT be an issue.. if you are five foot 8.. and tell someone you are five foot ten, she might think.. ohh as i am five foor 9 its ok for me to wear my heals and not look daft,,. then you turn up and she towers over you!
Quote by well_busty_babe
well as i dont drive... i would be a bit pissed of if i have travelled to meet you and then recieved a phone call saying... hahahaha.. i dont live their really!!!!!
Of course I'd give you the real location at that stage, I'm just talking about my dealings with complete strangers - and anyway, if you were travelling by train you'd go to the same station if you wanted to get to either of the 2 or 3 places involved. You would have to be either a local or a mapmaker to know that you were not in the place I give out!
Quote by well_busty_babe
the age thing might only be an issue with someone who has a very strict age range,,,,,if you were on the boundery and it was only you "lie" that got you in with a chance..
Heh, I've already been caught out with this one, except it was the lie that ruled me out! D'oh!
Quote by well_busty_babe
i dont think its a big deal really though. as for the hieght.......i think that MIGHT be an issue.. if you are five foot 8.. and tell someone you are five foot ten, she might think.. ohh as i am five foor 9 its ok for me to wear my heals and not look daft,,. then you turn up and she towers over you!
That's strange, I would have thought that was the most trivial of points to drift a bit on. I'll use my real height from now on... hmm, I wonder how tall I actually am?
Sex God
Quote by Mister_Discreet
]the age thing might only be an issue with someone who has a very strict age range,,,,,if you were on the boundery and it was only you "lie" that got you in with a chance..
Heh, I've already been caught out with this one, except it was the lie that ruled me out! D'oh!
am sure there is a moral here somewhere.. will have a look aroubnd and see if i can find it!!!!
I can see exactly where Mr D is coming from on this.
I also go in for a small element of disguise, however once I have been in PM with people for a while then I lift the said disguise (and many will confirm on here).
Dont get me wrong, I'm not in the business of deceipt, only a bit of self preservation.
I doubt whether anybody I have met will indicate that I have 'led them up the garden path' so to speak.
My location & other details are all pretty close if not spot on I would like to add.
Big hugs to all, Alex x x
I also go in for a small element of disguise, however once I have been in PM with people for a while then I lift the said disguise (and many will confirm on here).
Dont get me wrong, I'm not in the business of deceipt, only a bit of self preservation.
I doubt whether anybody I have met will indicate that I have 'led them up the garden path' so to speak.
My location & other details are all pretty close if not spot on I would like to add.
Big hugs to all, Alex x x
Sex God
Mr. D. , tell me to bog off if you think I'm out of order, but why are you so concerned about this issue anyway? I can understand if you're married or have a non swinging partner that you might not want your family to know you're here, but surely, even if you put the town you live in or nearest to, your proper age and height, you could not be recognised? Hey, if someone does recognise you from that info, what are they doing scrutinising your details to that level anyway without being a genuine swinger themselves? :shock:
If I put that i live near Preston, I'm 32, female, and am 5ft 7in tall - do you think anyone who hasn't met me would be able to recognise me from those details alone? I doubt it.
In my view, it is best to be honest about general things such as age, and deal with your paranoia in your own time 
If I put that i live near Preston, I'm 32, female, and am 5ft 7in tall - do you think anyone who hasn't met me would be able to recognise me from those details alone? I doubt it.
In my view, it is best to be honest about general things such as age, and deal with your paranoia in your own time
What Blue said. 
I don't use my real name or email address, and I rarely publish facial photos, but otherwise I'm not too bothered about revealing details about me or my life. I live in a town of many tens of thousands of people; if anyone can recognise me from the information I give here, good luck to them.
I don't use my real name or email address, and I rarely publish facial photos, but otherwise I'm not too bothered about revealing details about me or my life. I live in a town of many tens of thousands of people; if anyone can recognise me from the information I give here, good luck to them.
Quote by bluexxx
Mr. D. , tell me to bog off if you think I'm out of order...:
I might still be a bit of newbie round here, but I know enough never to tell a mod to bog off :-) ...epsecially not the pretty ones!
Quote by bluexxx
but why are you so concerned about this issue anyway?
I'm not actually hugely concerned, I just thought it might make an interesting topic :-)
One of the basic rules of the internet is to assume everything is a scam until you have a reason to believe otherwise - and the other swinging site I tried first did turn out to be a borderline scam, so I was very cautious about this site at first.
Now I'm more concerned that I may have been too cautious, so I posted this thread to test the water. If everyone slagged me off, I would apologise, and explain the sudden adjustments to my details now that I'm being 100% accurate - or if everyone said they did the same I'd be content with my small deception.
Sex God
Swinging Heaven, and all us beautiful people on it, are too good to be true, that is why people have a problem believing we are real .
But we are real - ain't the world a heavenly place indeed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.But we are real - ain't the world a heavenly place indeed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sex God
Yes, well, erm..... I REALLY do have pink hair :shock:
Orgasminator
true or not pleeeeeeeeease dont ditch the avatar it brightens up the dullest of days
scots pensioner 67
scots pensioner 67
Quote by warwick
you never let on you were eight feet tall..and juggled red ducks for a livnig :shock:
Now that really made me chuckle :giggle: :giggle: :giggle:
Quote by warwick
hope the avatars true at least :twisted:
Well yes they are my tits although they don't always look quite as they do over there <<<<<<<<<<<
Dawn :silly:
Mr. D
Im with you on this one. There is no need to give exact location to everyone or age , family details etc. nobody expects you to be 100 percent honest in this forum, just round about. Even in this day and age its too dangerous if you have a decent job and a positioon in respectable society!! I for one would not put anything on here that might jepordise either of the above or leave my h/b open to redicule.I know it shouldnt matter but it does!!
However should you be looking to meet anyone that is a different matter, you have to be 100% honest and up front before you meet them
Im with you on this one. There is no need to give exact location to everyone or age , family details etc. nobody expects you to be 100 percent honest in this forum, just round about. Even in this day and age its too dangerous if you have a decent job and a positioon in respectable society!! I for one would not put anything on here that might jepordise either of the above or leave my h/b open to redicule.I know it shouldnt matter but it does!!
However should you be looking to meet anyone that is a different matter, you have to be 100% honest and up front before you meet them
Orgasminator
bloody hell judy do you want a page to your self , ill read it later but now ive only got an hour spare lol
Indeed - thanks Judy for yet another well thought out and interesting post.
There is clearly an additional issue of pride (and also Pride!) for sectons of the scene that have been (searching for the right phrase here, and probaly getting it wrong) repressed that I had not considered.
I know that pride is a big issue in both the Gay and S&M fields, but how big an issue is it in the swinging scene? Should there be a dogging pride march to try and raise awareness of the baseball bat wielding hooligan issue?
There is clearly an additional issue of pride (and also Pride!) for sectons of the scene that have been (searching for the right phrase here, and probaly getting it wrong) repressed that I had not considered.
I know that pride is a big issue in both the Gay and S&M fields, but how big an issue is it in the swinging scene? Should there be a dogging pride march to try and raise awareness of the baseball bat wielding hooligan issue?
Sex God
I think there is an issue of Pride involved, also an issue of how comfortable you are with your own situation, as well as how able you feel to justify it to other people who may find out.
One thing to remember though is how easy is it really to identify someone from general information unless you already know them? And how many people can really be bothered to make the effort?
Having had a look at my past posts there is enough information for someone who knows my wife and I in real life to identify us. However so far no-one has rung us up and said we've seen you on swinging heaven!
I don't think you should go out and tell everyone you know that you are a swinger. However life is too short to spend it ashamed of what you enjoy. I think it also shows low self esteem - "Other peoples views are more important than mine so I had better appear to conform."
Roger (Waiting for that phone call) :shock: :shock:
One thing to remember though is how easy is it really to identify someone from general information unless you already know them? And how many people can really be bothered to make the effort?
Having had a look at my past posts there is enough information for someone who knows my wife and I in real life to identify us. However so far no-one has rung us up and said we've seen you on swinging heaven!
I don't think you should go out and tell everyone you know that you are a swinger. However life is too short to spend it ashamed of what you enjoy. I think it also shows low self esteem - "Other peoples views are more important than mine so I had better appear to conform."
Roger (Waiting for that phone call) :shock: :shock:
