found these scattered about the web...some laws in good old america...some still in date too....!
You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit. ( hope Sappho isnt offended? )
Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission
You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length
No person may walk about in public if he or she has the common cold
Pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.
Only animal services officials and policemen may molest animals
No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
It's illegal to possess realistic dildos
It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster
A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel
Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos.
Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
Males may not be sexually aroused in public.
It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM
When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.
It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
It's also illegal to take a lion to the movies
It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
"any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue."
It's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public (includes legs and face).
No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club
the law insists that dogcatchers notify dogs of impounding by posting a notice on a tree in the park.
In Boston it is illegal to bathe, unless under
doctor's orders.
- If you make faces at a dog, you can be fined ,
arrested or put in prison.
A couple cannot make love in a shop selling frozen
meat.
It is illegal to set mousetraps without a regular
hunting licence.
You may not have more than two dildos in a house
Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine
No person may show his or her buttocks on a playground
You may not hunt moths under a street light.
It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss
It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear.
Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street
It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner
Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited
If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
One may not pee in his neighbour's mouth.
Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire
It is considered an offence to attempt to have sex with one's dog
A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence.
A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17
It is illegal to have sex with a cow
At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
A woman can not be on top in sexual activities
No street-side trees may be planted that "obscure the air".
It is illegal to sell ice cream after 6pm, unless the customer has a note from his doctor.
While having sex, you must stay in the missionary position and have the shades pulled.
All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart. Making love in the space between the beds is strictly forbidden.
Oral sex is considered a crime against nature
Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited
Women must have their bodies covered by at least 16 yards of cloth at all times
A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.
It is illegal to wear your boots to bed
Tissues are not to be found in the back of one's car
Molesting an automobile is illegal
It is illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors
Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue.
Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the motorist must take his car apart, piece by piece, and hide it under the nearest bushes.
No one may bite off another’s leg.
You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday.
I like some of these, really makes you laugh though dunnit?
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and we thought we had some daft laws....
You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit.
I never realised there was a pictorial closed season for rabbits. But it doesn't say anything about using them!
NorthamptonMan wrote:
I just want to see someone using six dildos at once.
You might like this 'On Cary Frazier' -
Her father gave her dildoes six;
Her mother made 'em up a score;
But she loves nought but living pricks,
And swears by God she'll frig no more.
- John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester
love sappho xxx
:confused:
Orgasminator
A few more:-
It is still an offence not to attend church on Sunday. If a Church Warden finds you not to be in church during the 'Service' you are liable to be fined 1/- (Thats 5p in funny money).
It is also an offence for all able bodied men aged 16 upwards not to attend Archery Practice on a Sunday (presumably after church) 8)
Any man who accidentally kills another during the said Archery Practice cannot be found guilty of Murder.
All still on the Statute Books and date from the reign of Henry VIII.
Harry0
_________________________
I still practice with my single arrow. :lol: And not just on Sundays.
It is still an offence not to attend church on Sunday. If a Church Warden finds you not to be in church during the 'Service' you are liable to be fined 1/- (Thats 5p in funny money).
It is also an offence for all able bodied men aged 16 upwards not to attend Archery Practice on a Sunday (presumably after church) 8)
Any man who accidentally kills another during the said Archery Practice cannot be found guilty of Murder.
All still on the Statute Books and date from the reign of Henry VIII.
Harry0
_________________________
I still practice with my single arrow. :lol: And not just on Sundays.
