ANY CEILING HITTERS?

21 Oct 2005

It occurs to me that that the range of ones ejaculate may be enhanced by judicious timing of the pelvic thrust... perhaps an accelerating rotary hip motion culminating in the "fling" at the precisely optimum moment, somewhat in the manner of the Olympic hammer throw, would be conducive to the accomplishment of this feat... although I find it slightly less than credible that it could be done lying down, and the projectile would therefore proceed in an horizontal rather than vertical direction.
I believe a rigorous scientific evaluation is in order.

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Ice Pie
It occurs to me that that the range of ones ejaculate may be enhanced by judicious timing of the pelvic thrust... perhaps an accelerating rotary hip motion culminating in the "fling" at the precisely optimum moment, somewhat in the manner of the Olympic hammer throw, would be conducive to the accomplishment of this feat... although I find it slightly less than credible that it could be done lying down, and the projectile would therefore proceed in an horizontal rather than vertical direction.
I believe a rigorous scientific evaluation is in order.

Maybe we could have an SH Olympics and this could be one of the sports? dunno

In a layby? :rascal: :rascal:

21 Oct 2005

I have a question for Dammie......
Just whose bed did you use?

21 Oct 2005

Quote by EagerSlut
It occurs to me that that the range of ones ejaculate may be enhanced by judicious timing of the pelvic thrust... perhaps an accelerating rotary hip motion culminating in the "fling" at the precisely optimum moment, somewhat in the manner of the Olympic hammer throw, would be conducive to the accomplishment of this feat... although I find it slightly less than credible that it could be done lying down, and the projectile would therefore proceed in an horizontal rather than vertical direction.
I believe a rigorous scientific evaluation is in order.

Maybe we could have an SH Olympics and this could be one of the sports? dunno

In a layby? :rascal: :rascal:
layby, hmmm, if done outside, we would have to calculate things like wind speed and direction.
we would need a plastisene trip board, with cameras, just to make sure nobody over steps the mark. oh, and who would be brave enough to approach the olympic commitee?

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Alexandra
I have a question for Dammie......
Just whose bed did you use?

I just went upstairs and measured this one

Is that what you meant ? :lol2:

21 Oct 2005

Noooooooooo
when you were in the army!!!
Daft sod! rolleyes

21 Oct 2005

Quote by EagerSlut
Anyone managed to hit the ceiling with their cum.
I did once when I was sharing a girl with another lad. He wasn't far off either.

Were you on the top bunk then?
dunno

:rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Was it a very low ceiling?
Did it stick to the ceiling or did it cum back down and hit yer in the eye?
Did it take the paint off? :dunno:
More detail needed innocent

:whistling:
Sussed it.
What Spurter probably did was this;
As he was approaching the vinegar stroke he grasped his shoulder with his free hand pulling sharply down at the point of no return developing tremendous cross torque, thus adding impressive distance/ height : to his emission. :wanker:
:thumbup: cool

cc_7up

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Alexandra
Noooooooooo
when you were in the army!!!
Daft sod!

Good Lord, Aunty Alex.
That's like asking me how many wives I've had :shock:

21 Oct 2005

Quote by dambuster
Noooooooooo
when you were in the army!!!
Daft sod!

Good Lord, Aunty Alex.
That's like asking me how many wives I've had :shock:

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

21 Oct 2005

What about those of us who have the metal / brass type headboards.
And some shoot through the metal and hits the wall!
Never mind the ceiling, they are just too far off course. lol

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Sarah
What about those of us who have the metal / brass type headboards.
And some shoot through the metal and hits the wall!
Never mind the ceiling, they are just too far off course.

surely it makes the brass look antiqueyfied

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Sarah
What about those of us who have the metal / brass type headboards.
And some shoot through the metal and hits the wall!
Never mind the ceiling, they are just too far off course.

You mean the dangerous ones that it's just too easy to trap fingers behind ?????
Ah - but the standard issue bed was just a metal bedframe with a solid headboard.
Unless of course you consider the camp bed type thing.
(There's that fluckin "camp" word again mad

)
Hang on - I think I've a couple of pics somewhere.
Here ya go.
If you look in the bivvy behind, you can just see the c*mp beds. Not very practical as they didn't have headboards and it meant bending the cock out of position to get it under the flap (Hmmm - where've I heard that before :confused smile

21 Oct 2005

Yes well I have a metal / brass headboard and a marked / stained wall!!!!!!!! :shock:

21 Oct 2005

hhhhhmmmmmm . . . . interesting dammie! a very good post, and it's spurred me on to some in depth research of a scientific nature . . .
now obviously, to calculate the trajectory that results in a jism ceiling impact, you'll be familiar with these little diagrams . . .

there's actually a handy calculator which gives some absolutely gobsmacking figures!
with a penile angle of 50% ((( i used a protractor to see where mine came in at at the point of release! ))) we get a flight time of over a second, a muzzle velocity for the jism ejection of 7 whole meters per second, and a horizontal range of a little over 5 metres! :shock: :shock: :shock:
now call me completely inadequate in the trouser department if you like, but 5 meters seems like a bloody long way to me, unless you're flicking it off a ruler like you do with bogies and stuff? dunno

maybe further research and someone from the Royal Artillery could help us out no end?
neil x x x ;)

21 Oct 2005

Quote by neilinleeds
now call me completely inadequate in the trouser department if you like, but 5 meters seems like a bloody long way to me, unless you're flicking it off a ruler like you do with bogies and stuff?
maybe further research and someone from the Royal Artillery could help us out no end?
neil x x x ;)

From what I've heard you haven't hit the ceiling but you're quite capable of hitting at least three metres up the wall...... even with your "Completely inadequate in the trouser department" talents.
;)

21 Oct 2005

OMG you can tell NIL is back.
Now all we need is Ice Pie with one of his formulae.............
Then we can get Dambuster and anyone who wants to help him or anyone else for that matter, to check them out over the weekend and report back on Monday at hours.

:rotflmao: :rotflmao:

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Sarah
Yes well I have a metal / brass headboard and a marked / stained wall!!!!!!!! :shock:

either coveredthe headboard with a plastic sheet next time your doing it or squeeze it hard for him and point skywards

21 Oct 2005

don't need complex calculations, he was just having a wafty while jumping on mommy & daddies bed
or he's a dickhead

21 Oct 2005

Quote by EngleDansk

now call me completely inadequate in the trouser department if you like, but 5 meters seems like a bloody long way to me, unless you're flicking it off a ruler like you do with bogies and stuff?
maybe further research and someone from the Royal Artillery could help us out no end?
neil x x x ;)

From what I've heard you haven't hit the ceiling but you're quite capable of hitting at least three metres up the wall...... even with your "Completely inadequate in the trouser department" talents.
;)

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
redface

ops: :oops:
ello engledansk! good to see you! smile

though i don't know where you could have heard such a thing? ;)
neil x x x ;)

21 Oct 2005

Quote by neilinleeds
maybe further research and someone from the Royal Artillery could help us out no end?
neil x x x ;)

feckin Drop-shorts ?????????
Yer avin a tin baff aintcha ??????
db bolt

before bushwacker sees this

21 Oct 2005

I haven't got a headboard on my bed sad

:( :( :(
What am I going to aim at? dunno

:undecided:
Unless :idea: :idea: :idea: :idea: Someone invites me to aim at theirs :grin: :grin:

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Sarah
Yes well I have a metal / brass headboard and a marked / stained wall!!!!!!!! :shock:

When we left our last house, despite two coats of paint there was still a definite mark on the wall above the headboard redface

Cx

21 Oct 2005

Quote by SXBOY
were you standing on a set of encyclopedia wankers of the world volumns 1 to 42 ?

Excellent SXBOY, I love that comment it has really hit my tickle spot.

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Baggy Boy
were you standing on a set of encyclopedia wankers of the world volumns 1 to 42 ?

Excellent SXBOY, I love that comment it has really hit my tickle spot.
is that any where near matey boys ceiling he reckons he hit

21 Oct 2005

Quote by SXBOY
were you standing on a set of encyclopedia wankers of the world volumns 1 to 42 ?

Excellent SXBOY, I love that comment it has really hit my tickle spot.
is that any where near matey boys ceiling he reckons he hit
No, I can't hit the ceiling with a good stream of piss, he should be in the circus.

21 Oct 2005

May I also add - Not that i have tried redface

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Baggy Boy
were you standing on a set of encyclopedia wankers of the world volumns 1 to 42 ?

Excellent SXBOY, I love that comment it has really hit my tickle spot.
is that any where near matey boys ceiling he reckons he hit
No, I can't hit the ceiling with a good stream of piss, he should be in the circus.
yes there is a circus with all weird acts such as chain saw jugglers,,cant think of the name of it though

21 Oct 2005

Quote by Baggy Boy
May I also add - Not that i have tried

Me neither . . .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
. . . . yet surprised

ops:

21 Oct 2005

Quote by dambuster
feckin Drop-shorts ?????????
Yer avin a tin baff aintcha ??????
db before bushwacker sees this

*pulls up a pew, kicks back and waits for some inter-regimental fisticuffs . . . * :bounce:
neil x x x :P

21 Oct 2005

Quote by neilinleeds

feckin Drop-shorts ?????????
Yer avin a tin baff aintcha ??????
db before bushwacker sees this

*pulls up a pew, kicks back and waits for some inter-regimental fisticuffs . . . * :bounce:
neil x x x :P
While you're waiting, neil; ponder this (almost on topic)
A Rarden cannon (as fitted to Scimitar and Fox) fires a 30mm APDS round at approx 1220 metres per second and is capable of firing six rounds on automatic fire.
(If memory serves, but I can't bring the 76mm figures to mind)
Imagine what that would do to your japs eye if we could manage the same velocity :shock: