are single bi fems like dodos...........extinct

1 Oct 2004

looking through the profiles there are a lot of profiles of "single bi fems" looking for couples for fun, yet when ever we mail any of these it is a case of a; not single but part of a couple and looking for cpl swap not 3sum.................b; male pretending, WHY????..........c; just dont reply, why be ignorant if not interested at least reply with a "thanks but not my type" or such like................which brings us to the title of the thread ........are there really any bi fems on the site looking for couples or are there a lot of people just pretending and the genuine ones have gone the way of the dodo
the other thing that confuses us this is a site to get to know like minded people so there for a chat room is great but why dont people actually chat and get to know new people( you never know what your missing out on) so why do people in there only speak to peeps they know and not bother talking to new faces in there...............variety is the spice of life...........think of all that spice going to waste by sticking to same faces in chat
well moan overlets all have a good and fruitful life now its someone elses turn to use this soap box confused

1 Oct 2004

Yawn.....................
You are quite right - there are no genuine single girls on here, the people in the chat room are all wasters and nothing ever happens. You might as well try another site.
Holds door open.....................

1 Oct 2004

Quote by rogerthedragon
Yawn.....................
You are quite right - there are no genuine single girls on here, the people in the chat room are all wasters and nothing ever happens. You might as well try another site.
Holds door open.....................

A little harsh perhaps but fair point

1 Oct 2004

Well it's only fair to say it once again, since they're new....
Single bi-fems are so rare that they are inundated with mail - they haven't got the time to reply to them all, I'm afraid. If they did - even with a 'stock' reply, they'd still be up 'til 4am in the morning replying to stuff...
It's just the way things are :cry:
Why do men pose as single bi-fems? So they can get couples sending them pictures, of course. The fact that they are tossers doesn't seem to worry them... oh well...
Why do bi-fems advertise without telling you about their 'partner' - so they can get responses to their ads. Otherwise, posting as a couple, they've got the same chance as the 4 million other couples looking for bi-fems - i.e. very little unless they're mid-twenties, go to the gym everyday and look like models....
Sorry mates - but that's the truth...
Oh, and why don't people chat to other people in the chatroom? Well, people like the people they know - it's safer and easier. Why bother getting to know someone else, when you're already quite busy chatting to the people you already know?
Sorry about the other responses you've had to this question - but this question gets asked A LOT!

1 Oct 2004

I think all the bi-fems got converted into bi-guys in dressess biggrin

In fact judging by the party pics I think people had more fun from that than they ever could from the elusive bi-fembot.
Sorry to be flippant... but its friday... besides everyone wants a single bi-fem... its sooooooo pasae... its like sooooo last year dude.... go find something else todo thats cool hip trendy and unique!!

1 Oct 2004

I misread the title and thought....I didn't know dildos where, or even could be extinct
redface

1 Oct 2004

fair comments phil...............only thing is we not new, think what is new is the internet swinging craze...................swinging now as a different meaning to alot to what it used to do.............i know the net gets blamed for alot of things, even though it is a good thing, but with the advent of swinging sites so many people have jumped on the bandwagon so to speak, and come on these sites not realising what swinging is all about............honesty , respect, mutual likes etc. ..........excuse the french but to many people dabble thinking its a way to get an easy fuck for their self gratification not for the others persons mutual pleasure and a few just gets their rocks off by seeing others profiles and wishing that they too could feel at ease with themselves and lead a fruitful life...............the genuine swingers out there will know exactly what is being said here and understand why it is said..............

1 Oct 2004

waves
hello ahem single bi fem here
:shock: confused

:shock:

1 Oct 2004

Quote by Lil_Bunny
waves
hello ahem single bi fem here
:shock: :shock: :shock:

Who said that? A talking dodo?
Oh well...............

1 Oct 2004

Bunny,
Single bi-fem you may be - but far too picky! lol

How come you're not looking for a couple? (with a hairy male over 40.... :cry: )

1 Oct 2004

Quote by phil_osopher
Bunny,
Single bi-fem you may be - but far too picky!
How come you're not looking for a couple? (with a hairy male over 40.... :cry: )

Cos I don't like FFM that's why and the body hair thing is a personal preference
I'm not too picky - just know what I want and not prepared to settle for second best

1 Oct 2004

Quote by Lil_Bunny
Bunny,
Single bi-fem you may be - but far too picky!
How come you're not looking for a couple? (with a hairy male over 40.... :cry: )

Cos I don't like FFM that's why and the body hair thing is a personal preference
I'm not too picky - just know what I want and not prepared to settle for second best
Well said stick to your guns...

1 Oct 2004

Fair enough! cool

1 Oct 2004

Thanx Molly & Chris wink

1 Oct 2004

Quote by joric3442
fair comments phil...............only thing is we not new, think what is new is the internet swinging craze...................swinging now as a different meaning to alot to what it used to do.............i know the net gets blamed for alot of things, even though it is a good thing, but with the advent of swinging sites so many people have jumped on the bandwagon so to speak, and come on these sites not realising what swinging is all about............honesty , respect, mutual likes etc. ..........excuse the french but to many people dabble thinking its a way to get an easy fuck for their self gratification not for the others persons mutual pleasure and a few just gets their rocks off by seeing others profiles and wishing that they too could feel at ease with themselves and lead a fruitful life...............the genuine swingers out there will know exactly what is being said here and understand why it is said..............

well yes! granted! swinging is quite popular these days, possibly because it's quite good? and yes many newbies here see it as something it's not, post oneline ads hoping for the quick shag, and then moan about their disappointments here, quite possibly after wasting several peoples time and trolling them to death. can't argue with that.
but then you know that, and i'm soooo gonna hate myself for this, yet you present as a newbie complaining about a site that does indeed do everything you are looking for, and so far hasn't after how long? so long as you get to know people here it will work better than you might imagine. just as you do IRL perhaps? i may be wrong. what do i know? dunno

and having said all that i sincerely :welcome: you to the site, and hope you do find what you're looking for here. many of us have.
neil x x x ;)

1 Oct 2004

Quote by Lil_Bunny
Thanx Molly & Chris

Any time..

1 Oct 2004

Quote by Lil_Bunny
Bunny,
Single bi-fem you may be - but far too picky!
How come you're not looking for a couple? (with a hairy male over 40.... :cry: )

Cos I don't like FFM that's why and the body hair thing is a personal preference
I'm not too picky - just know what I want and not prepared to settle for second best
The good thing for a bi-fem is that fact that she can afford be picky cool

There are quite a few bi-fems around - I should know, about 20 of them are coming to my party in 2 weeks :twisted: :twisted:
I'm not single any longer, but when I was I did place an ad - and got over 300 replies in the space of just over 24 hours. That would probably explain why you don't get replies from those you send emails to Joric.
The other thing to bear in mind in the chat room is this. As you said yourself, there are an awful lot of people who come along to a site like this - particularly a free one - just out of curiosity. There are several more who come here to get a story rolleyes

A huge number of people on this site know each other personally, having met through parties, munches, at clubs etc, so naturally they will converse with each other because they know one another to be genuine people.
I know that makes life hard on the "newbies" whether they be new to the site or new to the scene, but it's just the way things are. Maybe the regulars are missing out on some "new spice" as you put it, but I'm sure you can understand their reticence with all the media attention that swinging is getting at the moment? We were all new once, but have stuck with it and made ourselves known to others in here and/or the chatroom, and munches are a great way to meet other members.
:welcome: to the cafe. Whingeing about the place isn't the best of starts, but now you've got it off your chest just join in and have fun. You never know, you may find you actually enjoy yourselves and then go on to meet new friends yourself biggrin

1 Oct 2004

Werent Dodo's slightly chubby, fluffy birds that didnt move very fast....???
Thats not a very nice thing to liken Single Bi Females to.........
Dx

1 Oct 2004

AngelChat,
Maybe you could offer some advice to those who are "seeking single bi-fems"
I know we havent had much luck (although we understand completly the problems with masses of replies and wouldnt dream of moaning about not getting a response)

1 Oct 2004

Quote by joric3442
the other thing that confuses us this is a site to get to know like minded people so there for a chat room is great but why dont people actually chat and get to know new people( you never know what your missing out on) so why do people in there only speak to peeps they know and not bother talking to new faces in there...............variety is the spice of life...........think of all that spice going to waste by sticking to same faces in chat
well moan overlets all have a good and fruitful life now its someone elses turn to use this soap box

I've lost count of the number of times I've said hello or tried to make new people (just like you) coming into the chatroom for the first time feel welcome. I've also lost count of the number of times I've been totally ignored, probably because my name is Steve and I don't have a pair of tits. Do you really go in there to get to know "new people" or do you go in there with the same tunnel visioned attitude that most couples looking for a single bi fem go in there with?
Just curious.
Steve

1 Oct 2004

Quote by steveg_nw
the other thing that confuses us this is a site to get to know like minded people so there for a chat room is great but why dont people actually chat and get to know new people( you never know what your missing out on) so why do people in there only speak to peeps they know and not bother talking to new faces in there...............variety is the spice of life...........think of all that spice going to waste by sticking to same faces in chat
well moan overlets all have a good and fruitful life now its someone elses turn to use this soap box

I've lost count of the number of times I've said hello or tried to make new people (just like you) coming into the chatroom for the first time feel welcome. I've also lost count of the number of times I've been totally ignored, probably because my name is Steve and I don't have a pair of tits. Do you really go in there to get to know "new people" or do you go in there with the same tunnel visioned attitude that most couples looking for a single bi fem go in there with?
Just curious.
Steve
I also am quite happy to chat to new people in the chat room, but the ones that say hi Lil_Bunny pm? well what can I say! Makes a big difference if u at least make an effort. Maybe u do, must say I've never chatted to you (I don't think) but then again my ad is quite specific and I only will chat in pm to those who have set up and ad and fit at least some of what I'm looking for (i.e location, sexuality) that's because I wouldn't like to waste anyone's time.
Lately I've had a few hassles in chat with single guys getting abusive in pm and the main room so I admit it does make me a little more wary.

1 Oct 2004

everyone takes it we are newbies.............just because we have just recently started posting.................altough have been members of the main site for quite a while after it was reccomended to us by a friend who we have met and as introduced us in chat room as a gen couple.............as for newbies well must take more than 5+ years on the scene to lose that status.....................we were told that this was a good friendly site to make new friends with same interests as ourselves..................as swingers and dont just mean ourselves but all users on here the first thing we should respect is each to there own tastes and with the bad press that we recieve and prejudice we need to stick together weather it be as prospective partners or just like minded friends................one of main reasons we started this thread was to get other peoples reactions as that way it is possible to see who on here is sincere and who is not.............and also because like so many others we get mail from folks who do not read the profile properly or who think an exception will be made for them, and i think most of you can relate to that

1 Oct 2004

Quote by mollyandchris
AngelChat,
Maybe you could offer some advice to those who are "seeking single bi-fems"
I know we havent had much luck (although we understand completly the problems with masses of replies and wouldnt dream of moaning about not getting a response)

Hmmm tricky one MollyandChris
When I advertised it wasn't for couples, so perhaps my earlier post was a bit misleading. I think the main problem when searching for the other partners to complete a 3some is the fact that all 3 parties need to find the other 2 attractive. Obviously when you're looking for a one to one "encounter" there are only 2 people in the equation and therefore it's much simpler. From my own personal point of view, I feel a bit uncomfortable with the whole arranging of it.
I like the cafe because I can get to know something of the other people in here, and when I go to munches I meet those people in real life and can tell whether that "click" is there. Its a totally non-threatening environment, even for a single female, bi or otherwise with no expectations whatsoever, and if you decide then that you want to take things further you can, whereas if you decide not to, nobody is going to feel uncomfortable with it because that wasn't the main intention of the night.
I know many people meet up on a social level initially, indeed I have met several people one to one from here. I was lucky in that the people I did meet were perfectly ok if there was nothing more than a meal and drinks, but it always worried me that if I was to meet a couple then I may feel under more pressure to "perform"
I'm not sure if this is making sense, but I think what I'm trying to say is, a single female will probably feel more vulnerable in a meet situation because she has nobody there who is on her side. The couple have each other, but if things were to turn nasty it would be two against one. Ok, maybe I'm just a big old scaredy cat. I must qualify what I've said above with this though. Now that I've met so many people from here, if my situation was to change (which I don't see happening :inlove smile

I wouldn't place an ad now. I'd go to munches and parties and meet people that way.
HTH

1 Oct 2004

Makes perfect sense in fact we've discussed many of those points before and can imagine it could be intimidating for the third party so to speak and unfortunatley no amount of reasurance would put them totaly at ease.

1 Oct 2004

Quote by joric3442
everyone takes it we are newbies.............just because we have just recently started posting.................altough have been members of the main site for quite a while after it was reccomended to us by a friend who we have met and as introduced us in chat room as a gen couple.............as for newbies well must take more than 5+ years on the scene to lose that status.....................we were told that this was a good friendly site to make new friends with same interests as ourselves..................as swingers and dont just mean ourselves but all users on here the first thing we should respect is each to there own tastes and with the bad press that we recieve and prejudice we need to stick together weather it be as prospective partners or just like minded friends................one of main reasons we started this thread was to get other peoples reactions as that way it is possible to see who on here is sincere and who is not.............and also because like so many others we get mail from folks who do not read the profile properly or who think an exception will be made for them, and i think most of you can relate to that

I did not assume you were new to swinging, I just found your post boring. It is your first post to the Cafe and you choose to make it a new thread complaining about the site. This is not a good way to find yourself/selves accepted. The equivalent to walking in to a pub and saying "Cor, this is a dump". Swinging Heaven is a good friendly site and great place to meet like-minded people - if you put in a bit of effort.
I genuinely hope you find what you are looking for, and I also hope you hang around long enough to settle in and enjoy the site.
Roger.

1 Oct 2004

Quote by joric3442
.c; just dont reply, why be ignorant if not interested at least reply with a "thanks but not my type" or such like................

As having been a single bi-fem (now part of a couple), I can personally vouch that you are constantly inundated with mail. After placing my ad, I received over 300 replies and after reading through them, it is impossible to reply to everyone. About 50% of the replies don't meet your criteria (although you have clearly stated what you are looking for), 25% are time-wasters leaving only 25% that are genuine.
Please don't be harsh on the single bi-fem, put yourself in their shoes, if only for a moment.