Something I have noticed (which seems to be becoming a trend) is the increased use of the term “bullyingâ€.
I am not sure if it links to the campaign to raise awareness of bullying in schools - but it sometimes feels that you can’t turn a corner without the words ‘bully’ or ‘bullying’ being flung around like a sock in a dryer.
There is a difference between not seeing the other perspective, being argumentative, debating, questioning, expressing your opinions, driving a point home or unintentionally being insensitive and ‘bullying’.
As a lover of debate and exploring issues, I find it most annoying when the ‘bullying’ flag is waved to :
- add weight to an opinion
- make a diversion
- indicate people are being insensitive to another perspective
‘Bullying’ is about the person and is intentional.
People will disagree on something sooner or later (with such a wide variety of people on here - more likely ‘sooner’). From my perspective, disagreement is about the subject matter and opinions or facts and details - NOT the person.
I have more to say on this matter, but I have a fair bit to do this morning. So I will end for now with a few comments.
Look up the word ‘debate’.
Look up the word ‘question’ (as in - to question).
Look up the word 'insensitive'.
Look up the word ‘bullying’.
I feel a number of valid points have been lost/diluted/deviated from due to the point maker adding the word ‘bullying’ when insensitive may have been a more appropriate term.
Inappropriate use of the label ‘bully’ is bullying itself!
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Bullying
Good point Pololady :thumbup:
I do love a good debate and it's very interesting to read other people's opinions and points of views on a whole range of subjects but I agree it's very annoying and more than a little disturbing when the whole thing is either turned into a personal dig at someone or, at the other end of the scale, someone takes something that's been said a bit too much to heart.
You've been at the caffeine again haven't you?
I do love a good debate and it's very interesting to read other people's opinions and points of views on a whole range of subjects but I agree it's very annoying and more than a little disturbing when the whole thing is either turned into a personal dig at someone or, at the other end of the scale, someone takes something that's been said a bit too much to heart.
You've been at the caffeine again haven't you?
:thumbup:
Some of my favourite threads are the ones which provoke thought and I'm more than happy if my opinions are changed somewhat through the course of debate.
To me that's one of the things that makes a good forum - the exchange and debate of differing opinions.
Bullying is a malicious activity whereby an individual is specifically and intentionally singled out.
To disagree with someone or challenge their opinions is not bullying.
The whole "smashy & nicey" approach just doesn't cut it for me - I have no respect for sycophants.
Some of my favourite threads are the ones which provoke thought and I'm more than happy if my opinions are changed somewhat through the course of debate.
To me that's one of the things that makes a good forum - the exchange and debate of differing opinions.
Bullying is a malicious activity whereby an individual is specifically and intentionally singled out.
To disagree with someone or challenge their opinions is not bullying.
The whole "smashy & nicey" approach just doesn't cut it for me - I have no respect for sycophants.
Quote by HornyLittleBlonde
:thumbup:
Some of my favourite threads are the ones which provoke thought and I'm more than happy if my opinions are changed somewhat through the course of debate.
To me that's one of the things that makes a good forum - the exchange and debate of differing opinions.
Bullying is a malicious activity whereby an individual is specifically and intentionally singled out.
To disagree with someone or challenge their opinions is not bullying.
The whole "smashy & nicey" approach just doesn't cut it for me - I have no respect for sycophants.
I agree (and not in a smashy an' nicey kinda way), I think the most important thing you can bring to a debate is an open mind.
H.x
I have little to say at the moment for once :shock: But I shall watch this thread with interest and when I feel I have a point to make it will be made 
It is a subject I've had plenty of experience in having been bullied through school due to a medical condition and also in the workplace early on in my working life. I'm not talking about a clash of personalities but more so work mates systematically trying to discredit me with such things as the overtime workers loosening wheel nuts on vehicles I'd serviced, parts going missing from the stores that were fittable on the vehicle I drove at the time to label me a thief and much, much more.
I have views on this subject but for once I'm going to take my time and compose them with out jumping in feet first
It is a subject I've had plenty of experience in having been bullied through school due to a medical condition and also in the workplace early on in my working life. I'm not talking about a clash of personalities but more so work mates systematically trying to discredit me with such things as the overtime workers loosening wheel nuts on vehicles I'd serviced, parts going missing from the stores that were fittable on the vehicle I drove at the time to label me a thief and much, much more.
I have views on this subject but for once I'm going to take my time and compose them with out jumping in feet first
Quote by sheddy
I have little to say at the moment for once :shock: But I shall watch this thread with interest and when I feel I have a point to make it will be made
It is a subject I've had plenty of experience in having been bullied through school due to a medical condition and also in the workplace early on in my working life. I'm not talking about a clash of personalities but more so work mates systematically trying to discredit me with such things as the overtime workers loosening wheel nuts on vehicles I'd serviced, parts going missing from the stores that were fittable on the vehicle I drove at the time to label me a thief and much, much more.
I have views on this subject but for once I'm going to take my time and compose them with out jumping in feet first
Sheddy to me that is undoubtably bullying.
Systematic and intentional malicious behaviour. There's just no need for it and it says more about the character of the bully than the victim.
Bullying takes so many forms.... what happened to Sheddy is downright criminal in my opinion.
Those who set out to make others lives miserable for there own gain no matter how trivial and those that support it are just as bad.... should all be ashamed like any normal person would but sadly from my own experience they have no morals, just very big and very sad ego's!
The thing I have found more than anything though is like many things in life, what comes round goes around...... faster for some than they ever dreamed!
I say never do to anyone what you would hate being done to yourself, personal pride goes a long long way when you do.
Mike xx
Those who set out to make others lives miserable for there own gain no matter how trivial and those that support it are just as bad.... should all be ashamed like any normal person would but sadly from my own experience they have no morals, just very big and very sad ego's!
The thing I have found more than anything though is like many things in life, what comes round goes around...... faster for some than they ever dreamed!
I say never do to anyone what you would hate being done to yourself, personal pride goes a long long way when you do.
Mike xx
I think i know the thread in question. I don't think that its bullying, it's just differing opinions on a subject. Thats what forums are about anyway and couldnt understand why the term bullying came up. We will never allways agree on lots off things and just have to accept that and move on to the next subject and not let it upset us.
I think some of us may take some things said personnaly sometimes, of which i'm one and fly of the handle initialy but i allways calm down and get on. As i did in the thread i'm thinking off.
I think some of us may take some things said personnaly sometimes, of which i'm one and fly of the handle initialy but i allways calm down and get on. As i did in the thread i'm thinking off.
Great postings so far - and thanks to PoloLady for starting this thread!
I've been called a bully on here :cry: which I must say I was very hurt by as being a victim of bullying all through my school years its something I'd never wish to inflict on anyone else - ever.
Yes it can be difficult sometimes in the fourm because you don't get the tone of voice behind the words so they can be misconstrued but as PoloLady rightly said:
:thumbup:
I've been called a bully on here :cry: which I must say I was very hurt by as being a victim of bullying all through my school years its something I'd never wish to inflict on anyone else - ever.
Yes it can be difficult sometimes in the fourm because you don't get the tone of voice behind the words so they can be misconstrued but as PoloLady rightly said:
Quote by pololady
‘Bullying’ is about the person and is intentional.
People will disagree on something sooner or later (with such a wide variety of people on here - more likely ‘sooner’). From my perspective, disagreement is about the subject matter and opinions or facts and details - NOT the person.
:thumbup:
Pololady, I agree with what you have said.
In the past I have put forward good arguments (a point of debate, not a stand up shouting match), instead of attacking the argument I have had the way it was put or myself attacked. If the argument is good but not liked attack the person, devalue the person to undermine the argument. Sometimes it works, sometimes not. Yes I know it is a bit disjointed but I hope you follow the meaning.
In the past I have put forward good arguments (a point of debate, not a stand up shouting match), instead of attacking the argument I have had the way it was put or myself attacked. If the argument is good but not liked attack the person, devalue the person to undermine the argument. Sometimes it works, sometimes not. Yes I know it is a bit disjointed but I hope you follow the meaning.
