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Cautionary Tales

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As there seem to be quite a lot of newbies here me being one. Has anybody got a cautionary tale or advice to tell to keep us out of trouble and/or crap experiences?
P.S.:violin: bit uspet nobody said hi after my last topic
Be nice to Jags and Blue
and dont eat yellow snow
Welcome to the forum
Hello and welcome :thumbup:
Quote by maleM
P.S.:violin: bit uspet nobody said hi after my last topic

Awww Apologies honey.
Hello and :welcome: to :swingingchair: Heaven.
Quote by maleM
As there seem to be quite a lot of newbies here me being one. Has anybody got a cautionary tale or advice to tell to keep us out of trouble and/or crap experiences?
P.S.:violin: bit uspet nobody said hi after my last topic
rolleyes
Maybe nobody has read it yet who has experience of a fleshlight?
Maybe they thought, 'I won't post because I'll be too tempted to draw attention to the comment about single guys' (while you try to make it sound like a positive comment, it came across as a bit of a 'poor me I'm a single male don't pick on them' comment.
Cautionary tale/advice? Don't complain about not getting meets straight away. Don't complain when people don't answer your posts.
Hi...
and the entry you got no replies from was only posted an hour ago ! A lot of regulars from SH are out and about right now...
So, advice would be, mellow out, have fun and don't whinge!
All the best fella....... though WTF is a "fleshlight"?
Quote by freckledbird
As there seem to be quite a lot of newbies here me being one. Has anybody got a cautionary tale or advice to tell to keep us out of trouble and/or crap experiences?
P.S.:violin: bit uspet nobody said hi after my last topic
rolleyes
Maybe nobody has read it yet who has experience of a fleshlight?
Maybe they thought, 'I won't post because I'll be too tempted to draw attention to the comment about single guys' (while you try to make it sound like a positive comment, it came across as a bit of a 'poor me I'm a single male don't pick on them' comment.
Cautionary tale/advice? Don't complain about not getting meets straight away. Don't complain when people don't answer your posts.
Sorry if it sounded negative I didn't mean it like that.
Isn't a fleshlight one of those ultraviolet wands that inflicts pain?
Quote by freckledbird
Isn't a fleshlight one of those ultraviolet wands that inflicts pain?

Mebbe it's just a torch and he meant to type flashlight ..... lol
Quote by postie
Isn't a fleshlight one of those ultraviolet wands that inflicts pain?

Mebbe it's just a torch and he meant to type flashlight ..... lol
Ahhhhhh, so this should be in the dogging forum, then? :lol:
well at least you got a response ,might not have been what you were looking for lol
Quote by northeastcoupleuk
well at least you got a response ,might not have been what you were looking for lol

Nice to talk to people after reading loads of posts
Quote by HornyRed
Fleshflight dunno :dunno:

Try
Quote by freckledbird
Isn't a fleshlight one of those ultraviolet wands that inflicts pain?

Mebbe it's just a torch and he meant to type flashlight ..... lol
Ahhhhhh, so this should be in the dogging forum, then? :lol:
I think he mistook Ann Summers for B&Q, explained to the assistant he wanted something long and hard with an "ON" switch that used batteries.... and ended up with a Maglite.... still, i guess he could say " the sun shines out of my arse!" :twisted:
:eeek: :eeek: :eeek: :eeek:
Quote by HornyRed
:eeek: :eeek: :eeek: :eeek:

what's wrong
Quote by maleM
Fleshflight dunno :dunno:

Try
Ewwwwwwww they look disgusting. How on earth is that hygienic?
Quote by maleM
Fleshflight dunno :dunno:

Try
Ahhhhhh.....

right! Now I get you..... but are they any good for walking to the end of the garden with at night?
(i almost typed wanking to the end of the garden.... but spotted it just in time...)
Quote by freckledbird
Fleshflight dunno :dunno:

Try
Ewwwwwwww they look disgusting. How on earth is that hygienic?
The gel insert comes out so you can rinse and wash it. Its a bit of a fiddle but not too bad.
Wasn't Cautionary Tales an anthology of poetry by Hilaire Belloc?
OK, I've already got me coat.
Philistines.
Quote by postie
Fleshflight dunno :dunno:

Try
Ahhhhhh.....

right! Now I get you..... but are they any good for walking to the end of the garden with at night?
I dont like, please take them away postie :scared: :scared: :scared:
Quote by freckledbird
Fleshflight dunno :dunno:

Try
Ewwwwwwww they look disgusting. How on earth is that hygienic?
You use a condom??? :evil2: :huh: :dunno:
Quote by Sexysteph
lol what a gigantic rip off
Are men REALLY that desperate that they need to shag a can.
What all good red light districts need - a fleshlight attached to the lamp-post with a sign over it pervs deposit here only £45 help support our clean up drive of the red light area.
Steph
/wanders off mumbling surely no man is that daft

Does this mean your against women using toys?
Just lucky that women can buy a round of drinks thats all
Please take them away :eeek: :eeek: :eeek:
Quote by maleM
lol what a gigantic rip off
Are men REALLY that desperate that they need to shag a can.
What all good red light districts need - a fleshlight attached to the lamp-post with a sign over it pervs deposit here only £45 help support our clean up drive of the red light area.
Steph
/wanders off mumbling surely no man is that daft

Does this mean your against women using toys?
Good point! (though still think they're minging..)
Quote by HornyRed
Please take them away :eeek: :eeek: :eeek:

No !!! I can't now somneone has quoted the picture!
Welcome mate, and a cautionary tale........
Well there was one bloke who didn't listen, and now he's gone somewhere :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
You obviously like shaved women or in this case bald ones.......... don't they come looking more like the real deal .................................or would having them surrounded with "wire wool" be a bit painful lol :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
OH by the way :welcome: