Chemistry and Hell...

13 May 2007

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term.
The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
lol

13 May 2007

got lost half way through this redface

Not good with chemistry surprised

ops:

13 May 2007

i wish i could have thought up some thing like this in my exams rotflmao

13 May 2007

Its one of those think outside the box moments isn't it.
I like this one too. There are some damned creative thinkers in this world.
The Dilemma
You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you
pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:
1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
2 An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only
be one passenger in your car?
Think before you continue reading. This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was
once actually used as part of a job application.
You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you
should save her first. Or you could take the old friend because he once
saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back.
However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up
with his answer. He simply answered: "I would give the car keys to my old
friend and let him take the lady to the hospital.. I would stay behind and
wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams."
Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to
"Think Outside of the Box."
DD biggrin

13 May 2007

Quote by devondelight
Its one of those think outside the box moments isn't it.
I like this one too. There are some damned creative thinkers in this world.
The Dilemma
You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you
pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:
1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
2 An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only
be one passenger in your car?
Think before you continue reading. This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was
once actually used as part of a job application.
You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you
should save her first. Or you could take the old friend because he once
saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back.
However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up
with his answer. He simply answered: "I would give the car keys to my old
friend and let him take the lady to the hospital.. I would stay behind and
wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams."
Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to
"Think Outside of the Box."
DD

You give your car to your friend and get them to take the ill person to hospital so you can stay with your perfect partner - yeah like fucking hell do I let them get my car seats wet and allow an uninsured driver to take my fucking car. Who the hell is dumb enough to hang around for a bus in that weather rolleyes

13 May 2007

Quote by Fiestybbw

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term.
The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

Pure genius i like this guy a lot!! :twisted:

13 May 2007

The dilemna one is rubbish, why would the old friend who saved your life, also have the hassle of taking some old dear to the hospital just so you can try and shag the girl in the bus stop?
what if he fancied the girl too? what if the old woman was smelly? what if the footie was on the TV?
whoever gave that answer in the interview would not be getting a job for me, selfish twats. lol

13 May 2007

I would shag the old lady (less chance of rejection) get the old friend to film it on his phone cam, and ask the girl of my dreams if she could take a look at the tapping noise near my exhaust whilst in mid thrust! :shock:
This would achieve many things, one being that the perfect girl would not only see i was a great shag, but charitable as well (always an endearing trait), give my mate a sense of purpose and something to show his mates down the pub, and give the old lady the best 2 minutes of her long life, and enable me to see if the girl of my dreams was any good at fixing cars something im absolutely useless at!
Is this thinking outside the box? wink

13 May 2007

Actually, if it is the partner I am always dreaming about… wouldn’t that mean I had fallen asleep at the wheel and I would likely crash into the bus stop and kill the other two. So now I don’t have to worry about what to do – just how long the ambulance would be :doh:
Or, I could just give them all a lift as my car seats 5 dunno

13 May 2007

already confused...just by the word chemistry! :cry:

13 May 2007

Quote by aj1980
already confused...just by the word chemistry! :cry:

It's Physics actually! :giggle:
.

13 May 2007

that dilema thing was used in an advert for the army very recently on the radio for new recuits.