come and point at the n00b

5 Feb 2005

hi all , 1st post smile

be gentle with me
brief bio
41 yr old male straight
recently met a female and we started dating , i knew prior to starting a relationship with her that she had swung b4 , both ways so to spk
she has broached the subject a few times and i thought id better join the site and find out what i should expect and the why and wherefores of the scene as ive never had sex with more than i personat a time b4 and as u can expect am a little aprehensive
she did sugest we start with a 3 some involving another female to easy me in :) or mayb goto a club and just get thrown in at the deep end
your sugestions / comments gratefully recieved

5 Feb 2005

Welcome jmk.
You've come to the right place to find out about swinging and what it's all about. There's plenty of information about peoples experiences and issues in the threads, though there's quite a few to wade through. Best way is to take your time and get to know people on the forum by joining in and let us get to know you. We often emphasize the social aspect of swinging here at SH and we hold regular munches where members can meet purely on a social basis, no pressure to play or anything. In fact some members of SH are not swingers but enjoy the social side nevertheless. Going to a munch, after you have got yourself known here first, is a good way into the scene, which you can take at your own pace. I would suggest you invite your new partner to join the forum as people will often want to talk to the both of you if you are intending to swing together as a couple.
Have fun!
Regards
LC

5 Feb 2005

Hiya jmk

Welcome to the forums biggrin

A great place to satisfy your curiosity, to figure out if it really is for your or not, if it is, to then work out what you want out of the swinging scene ...... and above all, to have a great time on here while you're figuring it all out :D
The Cafe is a great place to start, get to know others etc - whether you decide to swing or not will be your decision. So stick around, get to know us, let us get to know you, get yourself to a munch one day maybe - an excellent way of meeting people into the swinging scene, but with absolutely no pressure, a purely social night.
Have fun :D

5 Feb 2005

hi mate :welcome: & have a good time :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

5 Feb 2005

Whoops, done all my post and forgot to adhere to the thread title
Welcome Noob!!!

5 Feb 2005

:welcome: jmk
1st let me say you have come to the right place for info and if you need it advice
As has been said earlier in the thread, not all the members are swingers, some its purely the social side of things they love, we hold regular Munches ( thats a social gathering without any sex play or pressures as they are held in public veniews just so people can meet each other in a relaxed manner )
you will be nervous yes, thats natural, but that will pass. Its a great lifestyle with great people, and nobody would preesure you into it, if nothing else you will obtain an insight into a marvelous life style while you are here smile

5 Feb 2005

thanks all for the replies
sorry 4 the txt spk :P force of habit , and no im not a teenager who txt's on there mobile all the time , its from chatting on irc for many years . takes me ages to text anything on my mobile even with predictive text
the meets do sound a good idea . i'll have to sugest it to the better half , and mayb ask her to join the forum as im a shy type and dont really know to best go about starting to chat to people , which is strange really as i run an internet based car owners club with nearly 4000 members
i must admit i do feel some what a virgin again , ive always equated sex and love go hand in hand , then i meet someone that tells me theve visited a club at sheffield numerous times and had group sex . i guess im the typical person that thinks that love and sex go hand in hand .
im rambling now , anyways if you see my sitting in the corner in the chat room or at a meet say hi smile

5 Feb 2005

Hiya jmk, my advice would be to explore a few fantasies first. Your partner probably has a good idea about what she enjoys with swinging, but it would be worth exploring some 'hypothetical' situations between just the two of you first.
If the roles were reversed, and you were the female half of the couple, the advice would be not to get pushed into anything you were not absolutely sure about - just because you are a bloke, does not make the advice any less appropriate.
If the relationship is at all important to you - do not rush in to anything until you are sure about the way you will feel afterwards.
lhk
Kat

5 Feb 2005

Quote by KitKat
If the roles were reversed, and you were the female half of the couple, the advice would be not to get pushed into anything you were not absolutely sure about - just because you are a bloke, does not make the advice any less appropriate.

good point KAT , altho i guess if swinging is important to her then mayb im not the right bloke for her afterall , i would never want to hold someone back from doing something they enjoy , i have found from past experiences of relationships it will only become an issue later on and cause problems
i think i will take the advice given above and look at maybe a going to a munch with her , maybe this will dispell some of the concerns i have