Quote by westerross
... and each who have a right to have a different head on, depending on what happened last night.
:shock:
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
Consistency
Quote by Bloke2005
I tried a while back to get back to my piss taking, but one or two folk didn't like that, folk suddenly decided that cos its green, it aint allowed an opinion as a member, it aint allowed to rip the piss and try and get a laugh, so I've kinda given up and plod around the ads doing a bit of cleaning etc.
:cry:
Yes. I wondered who had your tongue and was quite jealous it wasn't me :twisted:
Now put down the feather duster and let's see a little of the 'pink' again please... 'green'? no 'opinion'?.. bollox, I say! You're human, if we prick you, you'll bleed... if we lick you, you'll purr and if we.... never mind.. :rascal:
I hereby certify you as the biggest Slapper on SH :giggle:
I have to agree and have sympathy with the mods in here.
It is NOT an easy job, it is VERY time consuming and it can remove their enjoyment of the site which is patently obvious from Davej's posts.
The mods are members first and mods second - people should realise that.
Their job is hard enough as it is as responsible members we should try to help not hinder tham in their work.
Forgive me is it seemed I was moaning about my thread earlier - I certainly was't - far from it. It actually made me smile at the time - which is what was actually intended with the (very tongue in cheek) thread.
I will end by saying
Bring back the old Davej!!
We miss him!
It is NOT an easy job, it is VERY time consuming and it can remove their enjoyment of the site which is patently obvious from Davej's posts.
The mods are members first and mods second - people should realise that.
Their job is hard enough as it is as responsible members we should try to help not hinder tham in their work.
Forgive me is it seemed I was moaning about my thread earlier - I certainly was't - far from it. It actually made me smile at the time - which is what was actually intended with the (very tongue in cheek) thread.
I will end by saying
Bring back the old Davej!!
We miss him!
Quote by davej
. . . . folk suddenly decided that cos its green, it aint allowed an opinion as a member, it aint allowed to rip the piss and try and get a laugh, . . . . .
I'm not having a dig. There is no vitriol in this. It's just my opinion. It's not a personal attack. I have a great deal of respect (automatic - not earned) for the held position of Mod, and Op.
These days, people who are appointened as Mods and Ops should be fully aware of what they are taking on. I make the "These days" distinction to acknowledge it couldn't have been so in the very early days of SH.
Whether it's true or not, whether it's right or not - Mods are seen as many things. Helpful. Guiding. Policing. Amongst other things.
Are they members first, Mods second ? Or vice versa ?
Can there be such a distinction ?
Should the positionof Mod be respected ? Regardless of whether or not the personhas earned such respect.
I absolutely believe so.
Can the Mod be separated from the member ?
I'm not so sure.
Should they be "allowed" to post bollox, banter and pisstakes ?
Absolutely yes !
But - imo - they should also bear in mind how their posts will be perceived, perhaps a little more so than the average "member"
People – whether Mods or members sometimes rip the piss out of me. Some bounce off me, and I them, with the bollox and banter. I’m personally lucky to have the sort of character that enjoys and embraces that aspect of the place – and indeed the lifestyle.
But I, and many others, have been around a good while, and (forgive the arrogance of this) – I know how the site works.
The same can’t always be said of newer members.
No matter how many times a topic has been covered.
No matter how good a friend the search button is. Or isn’t.
Yes – things get repetitive, even boring and annoying. But you (Mods) knew that.
Before you volunteered and put your names forward.
Posting styles, and content
"It doesn't always matter what's true, it's what people believe that counts"
and
“There is no such thing as an off duty policemanâ€
Quote by davej
I will remain consistent with one opinion though, one that I've aired before and thats is that the best moderators are the members, not the psuedo mods that charge around LMU with snipes dressed as advice, not the members whose names are green, but the members who in the past knew how to leave threads like this alone to stay on point and who turned dull threads into things worth reading and who battered the fuck outa tossers. All said and done more often than not, they got locked after you guys decided they were shite, . . .
And I think therein lies the need to see and acknowledge the difference it does make to posting styles when the name is “greenâ€
Quote by davej
. . . . unfortunately those signals, are getting less and less leaving us to ponder WTF now.
I can see that, but as has been said – the site is, and will always be - cyclic
I too have given up to some extent.
I sign in .......... I come to the cafe where I used to spend hours posting ......... I read a few threads .......... think whats going on .......... and log off.
I dont know why its changed but it has ................. I used to giggle everyday at half a dozen posts ........... its now difficult to find one of interest.
I dont believe any of it is the fault of the Mods or Ops........... its simply the fact that some of the old users dont post anymore.
So IMHO ......... the only way we can get threads that we want to post on ........ is to post them ourselves................ or the cafe will remain full of the topics that are currently in here.
davej .......... I miss your posting style ....... and find it sad that you cant post as you......... just because you are a Mod.
Just a suggestion ......... but why dont all Mods and Ops have 2 accounts ......... one to use when doing the Official stuff .............. one to use when being a "normal" member ?
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I sign in .......... I come to the cafe where I used to spend hours posting ......... I read a few threads .......... think whats going on .......... and log off.
I dont know why its changed but it has ................. I used to giggle everyday at half a dozen posts ........... its now difficult to find one of interest.
I dont believe any of it is the fault of the Mods or Ops........... its simply the fact that some of the old users dont post anymore.
So IMHO ......... the only way we can get threads that we want to post on ........ is to post them ourselves................ or the cafe will remain full of the topics that are currently in here.
davej .......... I miss your posting style ....... and find it sad that you cant post as you......... just because you are a Mod.
Just a suggestion ......... but why dont all Mods and Ops have 2 accounts ......... one to use when doing the Official stuff .............. one to use when being a "normal" member ?
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Quote by blonde
So IMHO ......... the only way we can get threads that we want to post on ........ is to post them ourselves................ or the cafe will remain full of the topics that are currently in here.
I do not beleive there is only one way or one way holds all the answers.
What we post is important though.
It is sadly becoming more noticeably common for a thread to start and irrespective of the nature of the thread or the subject matter it takes little time before you cannot tell that thread from a host of others - as it has been hijacked by the same ol’ pointless flirty comments which seem to keep appearing time and time again.
Oh there is nothing wrong with flirting and making flirty comments for a giggle when in moderation - but sometimes this seems like an overwhelming flood and it has potential to choke the interest out of the café for many of the less familiar people.
Repetitive deviation amongst a familiar group will effect the perspective of those thinking of dipping their toe - who may be able to bring some fresh blood into the café and maybe set off some sparks of interest in some of those posters we all miss.
With this in mind - it is hardly surprising the café is not what it once was.
It’s continuation becomes not too dissimilar to a spiral - tightening to a point of singularity.
Quote by PoloLady
It is sadly becoming more noticeably common for a thread to start and irrespective of the nature of the thread or the subject matter it takes little time before you cannot tell that thread from a host of others - as it has been hijacked by the same ol’ pointless flirty comments which seem to keep appearing time and time again.
Oh there is nothing wrong with flirting and making flirty comments for a giggle when in moderation - but sometimes this seems like an overwhelming flood and it has potential to choke the interest out of the café for many of the less familiar people.
Repetitive deviation amongst a familiar group will effect the perspective of those thinking of dipping their toe - who may be able to bring some fresh blood into the café and maybe set off some sparks of interest in some of those posters we all miss.
With this in mind - it is hardly surprising the café is not what it once was.
It’s continuation becomes not too dissimilar to a spiral - tightening to a point of singularity.
Think I said the same thing earlier PL
Quote by Jags
The reason that intelligent threads don't go past page 2 is that they are mostly TOTALLY hijacked very quickly by people chatting and not contributing to the topic under debate. No wonder people give up! It's a matter of despair for many of us, Mods as well, when this happens. And it happens LOADS.
Seems that some can't just leave threads alone. In the 'past' a serious topic would run for many many pages before running out of steam -now they just get bogged down in rubbish!
And then there's the 'sympathy' threads... don't get me started!! :twisted: :twisted: Especially when the topic requiring sympathy turns out to be untrue!:x
:P
Quote by PoloLady
Oh there is nothing wrong with flirting and making flirty comments for a giggle when in moderation - but sometimes this seems like an overwhelming flood and it has potential to choke the interest out of the café for many of the less familiar people.
Not just the less familiar !
Quote by PoloLady
Repetitive deviation amongst a familiar group will effect the perspective of those thinking of dipping their toe - who may be able to bring some fresh blood into the café and maybe set off some sparks of interest in some of those posters we all miss.
Repetitive deviation and predictable cliques !
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sex God
going back to your original post pololady where you say how things have changed within the cafe & the poor threads about.
I have personally noticed this myself, therefore apart from working more hours, I have taken a step back from the cafe.
Could we have a suggestions sticky at the top of the page for new ideas on how the cafe can be made better?
Could we a have newbies corner? when I was a newbie here I was very greatful for the threads that offered help for the newbies eg: chatroom help thread, some one had a great thread to answer ay newbie questions- Was it Sarah or blonde soz can't remeber. These were really good & shows that older people on this site DO welcome newbies. This way wouldn't this cut down on the little bitty threads on here maybe the mods could take it in turns to run them so at least the answers will be correct & not half answered.
soz I'm waffling as normal
will get back in my corner now 
& :gagged:
I have personally noticed this myself, therefore apart from working more hours, I have taken a step back from the cafe.
Could we have a suggestions sticky at the top of the page for new ideas on how the cafe can be made better?
Could we a have newbies corner? when I was a newbie here I was very greatful for the threads that offered help for the newbies eg: chatroom help thread, some one had a great thread to answer ay newbie questions- Was it Sarah or blonde soz can't remeber. These were really good & shows that older people on this site DO welcome newbies. This way wouldn't this cut down on the little bitty threads on here
maybe the mods could take it in turns to run them so at least the answers will be correct & not half answered.soz I'm waffling as normal
will get back in my corner now & :gagged: Also on the topic of the cafe slowing up I geuinelly can't see the reason why, people are still about newbs are coming all the time and a lot of people go to great lengths to make them feel welcome, when I first started using the place I was shy and to be honest it was nonsense threads that allowed me to get over that coupled with a few members making the effort to make me feel welcome by the od PM here and there. People just don't seem to be contributing for what ever reason, though some still are and do a bloody good job of it but there just doesn't seem the bounce or humour there was when I first came here. But like I said the reason why I ain't got a clue. 
:? :?
:? :? Quote by Jags
The reason that intelligent threads don't go past page 2 is that they are mostly TOTALLY hijacked very quickly by people chatting and not contributing to the topic under debate. No wonder people give up! It's a matter of despair for many of us, Mods as well, when this happens. And it happens LOADS.
Seems that some can't just leave threads alone. In the 'past' a serious topic would run for many many pages before running out of steam -now they just get bogged down in rubbish!
And then there's the 'sympathy' threads... don't get me started!! :twisted: :twisted: Especially when the topic requiring sympathy turns out to be untrue!
:P
Thank you hun =
Phredd
Sex God
Quote by Blonde
So IMHO ......... the only way we can get threads that we want to post on ........ is to post them ourselves................
yup! :thumbup: ;)
sheddy, the forum always seems to go through slow patches from time to time, and has it's ups and downs, but it does seem to be slowing lately at an alarming rate? even with the constant influx of newbies? according to my homepage, we regularly have a 1000 users in chat, but less than a 100 on all 3 forums? i guess the chatroom has more obvious, immediate appeal for newbies, and hopefully in time we'll get some of them drifting into the forum more when they've got into the site?
the problem is, i think, that most of us need someone else to bounce off to get the posting going, and hopefully leave openings for others to bounce back. when it's slow though, noone can really get the thing kickstarted, so everyone ends up struggling, and it get's even slower, so the trend continues downwards? a lot of the people who i'd bounce off are either no longer here, or they're here but seemingly struggling themselves, so the quality ((( as i see it? ))) is kinda hard to find? which then means everyone get's bored stupid trawling through every thread on page one hoping to find something that sparks a bit of interest?
i guess that goes some way to explaining the hijacking and constant flirting, etc that's been mentioned earlier. at least those people are posting, and adding something to the forums keeping 'em ticking over, even if it's not universally admired kinda posting, and possibly self-interested, but then you have the problem of the odd half decent thread getting killed cos i for one can't be arsed reading through 2 pages of irrelevance and trying to get it back on topic, and seems noone else can either? ((( not a criticism, just an observation! ;) and yes, i've been guilty of blatant hijacking too! *hangs head in shame!* ;) )))
i'm hoping it picks back up, cos the forum seems in desperate need of some new blood ((( which is why i get so pissed off at old-hands jumping on newbies for little reason, cos we need 'em to stay FFS! ))) and a bit more of the old too, but the problem is there's not a whole lot at the mo to entice people into making the effort on the forums. i'd hate to think it was in terminal decline cos it's the best part of the site IMO!
neil x x x ;)
Quote by neilinleeds
the problem is, i think, that most of us need someone else to bounce off to get the posting going, and hopefully leave openings for others to bounce back.
I've just been reviewing an old thread and commented to dammie about it. It was something that started out of nothing, but ran to 8 pages as you didn't just have a couple of people bouncing off each other there were about 20 people bantering with others throwing the odd post in.
I think I have a solution - it's a bit radical but just might work.....
We need a good mixture of the people but a core group of the comedians all in here at once.
I'm would like some volunteers (preferably trained by the Sarge for the SH security forces) to round up the following members and lock them in The Cafe :shock:
On the Wanted list (alive, but bound & gagged is acceptable)
NeilinLeeds
Davej
Warwick
Pololady
Easy
Well Busty Babe
Dav69e
Dambuster
Bloke2005
Missy
Big G
Staggy
And I've called in a ringer to give us a hand
Sex God
S'alright I didn't want to join in anyway!! :giggle:
Sex God
Quote by HornyLittleBlonde
S'alright I didn't want to join in anyway!! :giggle:
Bloody cliques!!!
Sex God
Quote by HornyLittleBlonde
S'alright I didn't want to join in anyway!! :giggle:
Bloody cliques!!!
Erm well as I'm not on the list either maybe you myself & choon could have our own little get tohether :rascal:
Sounds bloody good to me Sexy
xx
I think there has been a shift towards camming and chatting through the site. Generally its an enjoyable experience and a bit more like real life, ie talking in the here and now with someone. Its also a huge vehicle for safe sex of the mutual particpating voyeuristic style. So its been fairly successful.
This shift to reality based experiences leaves a gap in the intellectual debating circles, which is probably why people think the forums have dumbed down a bit. But people will only be happy with what they find relatively easy to read and discuss and will soon drop out of the debate, or highjack it; if it veers into more advanced use of language, or more demanding arguments.
This shift to reality based experiences leaves a gap in the intellectual debating circles, which is probably why people think the forums have dumbed down a bit. But people will only be happy with what they find relatively easy to read and discuss and will soon drop out of the debate, or highjack it; if it veers into more advanced use of language, or more demanding arguments.
Sex God
Quote by the_Laird
S'alright I didn't want to join in anyway!! :giggle:
Bloody cliques!!!
Erm well as I'm not on the list either maybe you myself & choon could have our own little get tohether :rascal:
Sounds bloody good to me Sexy
xx
Sounds good to me too! That makes three so far........
Sex God
HLB! 
unfortunately, i'll have to decline your admittedly very tempting offer of being bound and gagged? partly cos i ain't on here hardly at all, but mainly cos i've lost me sense of humour somewhere? i know i had one somewhere, and i can just about remember what it looked like, but can i feck find the damn thing? it would help if i knew where i'd last seen it, but you know how it is . . . . always in the last pigging place you look innit? probably down the back of a sofa with 37 pence and a half-sucked hairy winegum?
((( does anyone else think that's a daft saying? course it's in the last place you look innit, cos you stop looking when you find it dontcha, making it . . . . erm . . . the last place you looked? :dunno: bleedin' stupid saying that is! )))
that's the thing though. the cafe was never heavy? it was a riot! i could guarantee every morning i'd find a good few threads on page one that made me feckin' wet meself. my monitor couldn't cope with it, and gave up the ghost after one beer-spraying too many? and the beauty of the forum is, a good thread lasts forever, and you can come back to it again and agagin. the chatroom is a completely different beast, and i think if you only use chat, you're missing the best bit of the site? ((( when it's at it's best! ))) but yeah it does seem that the emphasis is on chat and camming, which has more obvious attractions?
neil x x x ;)
unfortunately, i'll have to decline your admittedly very tempting offer of being bound and gagged? partly cos i ain't on here hardly at all, but mainly cos i've lost me sense of humour somewhere? i know i had one somewhere, and i can just about remember what it looked like, but can i feck find the damn thing?
it would help if i knew where i'd last seen it, but you know how it is . . . . always in the last pigging place you look innit? probably down the back of a sofa with 37 pence and a half-sucked hairy winegum? ((( does anyone else think that's a daft saying? course it's in the last place you look innit, cos you stop looking when you find it dontcha, making it . . . . erm . . . the last place you looked? :dunno: bleedin' stupid saying that is! )))
Quote by duncanlondon
This shift to reality based experiences leaves a gap in the intellectual debating circles, which is probably why people think the forums have dumbed down a bit. But people will only be happy with what they find relatively easy to read and discuss and will soon drop out of the debate, or highjack it; if it veers into more advanced use of language, or more demanding arguments.
that's the thing though. the cafe was never heavy? it was a riot! i could guarantee every morning i'd find a good few threads on page one that made me feckin' wet meself. my monitor couldn't cope with it, and gave up the ghost after one beer-spraying too many? and the beauty of the forum is, a good thread lasts forever, and you can come back to it again and agagin. the chatroom is a completely different beast, and i think if you only use chat, you're missing the best bit of the site? ((( when it's at it's best! ))) but yeah it does seem that the emphasis is on chat and camming, which has more obvious attractions?
neil x x x ;)
Quote by neilinleeds
HLB!
unfortunately, i'll have to decline your admittedly very tempting offer of being bound and gagged? partly cos i ain't on here hardly at all
Yes I had noticed - hence the reason you need to be bound, gagged and locked in The Cafe.
Well if your determined to decline that offer, why don't you come and join me, Tune & the laird - I'm sure we could accommodate :twisted:
Just a little observation 
There was a thread started about 10 days ago which is stilll going strong. About 16 pages now and on page one and has been since it started!
But when an exact same thread was started about 4 weeks before the start of this one it was locked before it got going!
Why is the question that springs to mind :) Does it depend on who is monitoring the site at the particular time? does it depend on who starts the thread ?
Ive never started a thread, i dont do that many posts but can see where a lot of people who might have something that they think might be interesting to post. Would be put of thinking it could be locked before it even got going.
Did i just say that aloud must be the beer! time for bed :lol:
There was a thread started about 10 days ago which is stilll going strong. About 16 pages now and on page one and has been since it started!
But when an exact same thread was started about 4 weeks before the start of this one it was locked before it got going!
Why is the question that springs to mind :) Does it depend on who is monitoring the site at the particular time? does it depend on who starts the thread ?
Ive never started a thread, i dont do that many posts but can see where a lot of people who might have something that they think might be interesting to post. Would be put of thinking it could be locked before it even got going.
Did i just say that aloud
must be the beer! time for bed :lol: 
Sex God
Quote by neilinleeds
So IMHO ......... the only way we can get threads that we want to post on ........ is to post them ourselves................
yup! :thumbup: ;)
sheddy, the forum always seems to go through slow patches from time to time, and has it's ups and downs, but it does seem to be slowing lately at an alarming rate? even with the constant influx of newbies? according to my homepage, we regularly have a 1000 users in chat, but less than a 100 on all 3 forums? i guess the chatroom has more obvious, immediate appeal for newbies, and hopefully in time we'll get some of them drifting into the forum more when they've got into the site?
the problem is, i think, that most of us need someone else to bounce off to get the posting going, and hopefully leave openings for others to bounce back. when it's slow though, noone can really get the thing kickstarted, so everyone ends up struggling, and it get's even slower, so the trend continues downwards? a lot of the people who i'd bounce off are either no longer here, or they're here but seemingly struggling themselves, so the quality ((( as i see it? ))) is kinda hard to find? which then means everyone get's bored stupid trawling through every thread on page one hoping to find something that sparks a bit of interest?
i guess that goes some way to explaining the hijacking and constant flirting, etc that's been mentioned earlier. at least those people are posting, and adding something to the forums keeping 'em ticking over, even if it's not universally admired kinda posting, and possibly self-interested, but then you have the problem of the odd half decent thread getting killed cos i for one can't be arsed reading through 2 pages of irrelevance and trying to get it back on topic, and seems noone else can either? ((( not a criticism, just an observation! ;) and yes, i've been guilty of blatant hijacking too! *hangs head in shame!* ;) )))
i'm hoping it picks back up, cos the forum seems in desperate need of some new blood ((( which is why i get so pissed off at old-hands jumping on newbies for little reason, cos we need 'em to stay FFS! ))) and a bit more of the old too, but the problem is there's not a whole lot at the mo to entice people into making the effort on the forums. i'd hate to think it was in terminal decline cos it's the best part of the site IMO!
neil x x x ;)
And then when a superb post like the one above is posted, you feckin miss it cause you have got so fed up with the whinging and wineing that you yourself have been enticed into the chat rooms and the next thing you know its passed you by.
excellent post Neil. and sooo 'nail on the head'
thanks :thumbup:
Two things here really with the revolution if the thread.
Consistency - a tricky one really as everyone has personal interpretations and I think depending on who's about, different types of thread will be locked but there is usually a common factor somewhere along the line even if it seems obscure at times
For new members I'm sure it must feel like picking through a minefield on occasion, but to be honest it's always been that way there's just been a greater influx in recent months that makes the padlocks look overpowering on occassion.
For the silly threads, on the whole and for as long as I can remember, a certain amount of leniency is usually given to longer standing members as there may be a humourous reason apparant from personal relationships built, posting styles etc, that the Mods won't have for a new member.
It may seem unfair to new members but if they stick it out it gets a lot easier.
Hijacking and lack of interesting threads - apart from medical reasons, and never having been a prolific poster anyway, one of the other reasons I find I post even less at present, is that so much of the forum appears to be dictated by the chatrooms including a lot of the hijacking that goes on.
I'm not a chatroom person so they don't really hold a deal of interest to me and after a while you find yourself visiting a bit less each day.
I read fewer threads as I become aware that the thread starter or last poster will end up bringing it around to what fun was had in the chatroom.
As has been noted some of the more entertaining or thought provoking posters are about less and on some days it feels as though the cafe has become a static shot of the chatroom with most debates, queries, complaints being about that.
I also see some of the hijacking problems as being brought about by older members.
Advice regarding hijacking given to newer members nearly always includes:-
# You know you've been accepted if you get hijacked
# It a show of affection really
# If you can't accept a hijacking then you need to lighten up .............
and so on.
This encourages those who want to fit in to go out and hijack threads or set up threads for being hijacked, and as they might not have realised that the original hijacking was often carefully thought out for the amusement of others it oftens ends in flirting that really belongs in pm.
As you sow, so shall you reap :lol: :lol:
That said the forums are cyclical and I'll be interested to see how they move forward on this occasion, because it's never been another part of the site that has created such a change in the type of threads being posted.
It's nice that it can still be discussed though and that people feel they can comment. Locked thread frenzy aside, rarely do important one's like this, questioning the nature or development of the forums disappear.
Jas
XXX
Consistency - a tricky one really as everyone has personal interpretations and I think depending on who's about, different types of thread will be locked but there is usually a common factor somewhere along the line even if it seems obscure at times
For new members I'm sure it must feel like picking through a minefield on occasion, but to be honest it's always been that way there's just been a greater influx in recent months that makes the padlocks look overpowering on occassion.
For the silly threads, on the whole and for as long as I can remember, a certain amount of leniency is usually given to longer standing members as there may be a humourous reason apparant from personal relationships built, posting styles etc, that the Mods won't have for a new member.
It may seem unfair to new members but if they stick it out it gets a lot easier.
Hijacking and lack of interesting threads - apart from medical reasons, and never having been a prolific poster anyway, one of the other reasons I find I post even less at present, is that so much of the forum appears to be dictated by the chatrooms including a lot of the hijacking that goes on.
I'm not a chatroom person so they don't really hold a deal of interest to me and after a while you find yourself visiting a bit less each day.
I read fewer threads as I become aware that the thread starter or last poster will end up bringing it around to what fun was had in the chatroom.
As has been noted some of the more entertaining or thought provoking posters are about less and on some days it feels as though the cafe has become a static shot of the chatroom with most debates, queries, complaints being about that.
I also see some of the hijacking problems as being brought about by older members.
Advice regarding hijacking given to newer members nearly always includes:-
# You know you've been accepted if you get hijacked
# It a show of affection really
# If you can't accept a hijacking then you need to lighten up .............
and so on.
This encourages those who want to fit in to go out and hijack threads or set up threads for being hijacked, and as they might not have realised that the original hijacking was often carefully thought out for the amusement of others it oftens ends in flirting that really belongs in pm.
As you sow, so shall you reap
:lol: :lol: That said the forums are cyclical and I'll be interested to see how they move forward on this occasion, because it's never been another part of the site that has created such a change in the type of threads being posted.
It's nice that it can still be discussed though and that people feel they can comment. Locked thread frenzy aside, rarely do important one's like this, questioning the nature or development of the forums disappear.
Jas
XXX
There is no doubt there are some real stars on here,people who give a lot of personality,humour and warmth to the forum but I know I myself have never quite found my voice in The Cafe,part of that is down to me and my not hitting my stride,part of it is that it feels a bit like a closed shop of regulars who know one another and one gets a feeling that one has to apologise for coming on this site with an interest in NSA sex to people who are constantly engaging in..NSA sex!
Good luck to you if you are but please don't condemn guys like me for wanting to do that as well!
I'm aware that it has to be earned,nobody "owes" it to anyone just because this is called a swinging site.I'm also aware that there is a lot,lot more to SH than sex but,not that I am,I just feel like I could just go now and nobody would notice but SH needs to embrace those such as I who have plucked up the courage to try and join in,give us then have prove we are worthy of being accepted like that but that will soon be apparent by our conduct thereafter.
Good luck to you if you are but please don't condemn guys like me for wanting to do that as well!
I'm aware that it has to be earned,nobody "owes" it to anyone just because this is called a swinging site.I'm also aware that there is a lot,lot more to SH than sex but,not that I am,I just feel like I could just go now and nobody would notice but SH needs to embrace those such as I who have plucked up the courage to try and join in,give us then have prove we are worthy of being accepted like that but that will soon be apparent by our conduct thereafter.
Sex God
Quote by niceandgentle
There is no doubt there are some real stars on here,people who give a lot of personality,humour and warmth to the forum but I know I myself have never quite found my voice in The Cafe,part of that is down to me and my not hitting my stride,part of it is that it feels a bit like a closed shop of regulars who know one another and one gets a feeling that one has to apologise for coming on this site with an interest in NSA sex to people who are constantly engaging in..NSA sex!
Good luck to you if you are but please don't condemn guys like me for wanting to do that as well!
!I'm aware that it has to be earned,nobody "owes" it to anyone just because this is called a swinging site.I'm also aware that there is a lot,lot more to SH than sex but,not that I am,I just feel like I could just go now and nobody would notice but SH needs to embrace those such as I who have plucked up the courage to try and join in,give us then have prove we are worthy of being accepted like that but that will soon be apparent by our conduct thereafter.
Well I for one am sorry that you feel that way, and having digested your posting a couple of times, i recognize myself in there.
adding comments from jaz n tim to my thoughts on this, it just goes to show how misconceptions can cause so much insecurity.
We have been on this site for quite some time now, and to be honest, it really makes me laugh when I hear members of the old cliques, whinge about the perceived new ones
When caron and I joined this site, many moons before the takeover, cliques were ripe and fruitful. And as far as the chance of penetrating any of them, forget it. :rascal:
(sorry peeps, rant coming on here)
I am finding it really hard to reconcile some of the comments that have been bandied about in here recently with the actual truth, and am getting a little fed up with threads that ‘pretend to be comments in general’ that are quite blatantly well aimed criticisms.
And as for the whole clique question, how fucking dare you? Where do you find the balls? When we first joined this site it was more riddled with cliques than the feckin Masons, and trying to get accepted on here was like trying to join the Knights Templar ffs. And if your face didn’t fit, you would soon find yourself out on a limb.
So please, can we stop with the bollox?
Yes, the forums have gone down hill, why?
Because the facilities on the forums no longer match those of the chat rooms.
The showing of “bits and bobs†has been stopped in the forums, yet since the advent of cams, has been actively encouraged in the chatrooms. Why? Because of google ffs, It isn’t that difficult to understand.
Now if we could all just stop reminiscing about the bad old days, and pull together to make the café a place where we can all fit in, old and new alike, then maybe, just maybe, we might just return this place to the greatest meeting place for likeminded people in the country that it deserves to be.
On the other hand we could just let the whole forum thing degenerate into a “them and us†whinge fest and loose the facility for everyone, which of course would save a packet for the site
I know which way I’d rather go!
You've gone over my head a bit with the clique rant - the only mention of them in the thread was humerously made so I'm not quite sure about that bit.
If you have read my post as a complaint about cliques then you've completely misunderstood it.
Forums need new blood to survive otherwise they stagnate and get extremely boring.
The chatroom is far more popular with many users nowadays which is why I made my personal observation on the increase of threads about it.
Just because they hold no interest to me doesn't make it a clique, indeed many people I'd categorise as friends get a lot of enjoyment out if it.
The nature of forums and building realtionships with other users means that people will always harken back to previous things that have impacted on them, as well as new things that may be of interest to themselves and others.
Thats life and it will always happen.
Jas
XXX
If you have read my post as a complaint about cliques then you've completely misunderstood it.
Forums need new blood to survive otherwise they stagnate and get extremely boring.
The chatroom is far more popular with many users nowadays which is why I made my personal observation on the increase of threads about it.
Just because they hold no interest to me doesn't make it a clique, indeed many people I'd categorise as friends get a lot of enjoyment out if it.
The nature of forums and building realtionships with other users means that people will always harken back to previous things that have impacted on them, as well as new things that may be of interest to themselves and others.
Thats life and it will always happen.
Jas
XXX
