Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
do you ever get the feeling
Quote by varcaEarthy
You are not alone and it's not the site that's at issue for me either. I too threw myself into the forums and munches and for the most part, I do still thoroughly enjoy it and I have made some very good friends on here. I've even ventured into chat as you know :grin:
There is something in the air I think. I've been coming in here but my enthusiasm has waned a little and akin to what Fabio said, it's not always the first place I visit when I log on these days. I started to get a bit worried when the first thing I started doing last week was checking my work email first :eeek: As part of this I have spent the last week or so assessing what I want, is this scene still for me?; Do I want to remain a swinger?; Am I now ready again for a relationship?; Do I want a relationship where swinging is part of the relationship? So many questions running around in my head lol.
Tomorrow I may feel totally differentlyI think a lot of how I am feeling this week stems from my ex informing me that he was emigrating to Canada to be with the woman he had an affair with. I won't miss my ex but I do sometimes get miffed that he is happily settling down again with partner number 5 lmao. Then I think, why am I bothered, as I don't want to settle down again, I am happy with NSA, and then I start questioning myself again lol
I'm not sure I've answered the original question but I hope you decide on what is right for you hon :kiss:
PS I do hope you are still coming to Wigan, my wine needs to make friends with your pink plastic glasses :grin:
i think you may be in the same mind set as me at the moment varca, my ex gets married this month to the girl he left me for, maybe thats getting to me but i didnt think so, so maybe the whole relationship thingy is batting round my head too and i confuse myself too easily.
Essex i also think you are right i dont think i could walk away i tried it for a week once and didnt get past 2 days
Earthy xx
You are most certainly not alone, not at all People are fickle earthy, my Nanna once told me the only person you can truely trust is yourself.
As for the Swinging - it's great and such horny fun but it brings me to think, is it true you can get too much of a good thing? and can the novelty wear off?
People are fickle earthy, my Nanna once told me the only person you can truely trust is yourself.As for the Swinging - it's great and such horny fun but it brings me to think, is it true you can get too much of a good thing? and can the novelty wear off?
Sex God
Another lost soul here 
You might have noticed i don't post on any of the sites much anymore, probably less in a month than i used to in a day. just can't be arsed and don't find that much interesting, i was looking at the posts earlier and thought 'is that all?'.
I come here for flirtennis with a few friends, to have a quick nose at whats going on and pop in the odd comment here and there. As you've said it's not just this site that fallen on it's arse a little and i think a few of the old bunch have fallen at the same time, just in a slightly different direction.
I don't have any ex's getting married or anything so it can't be that (i wouldn't get upset if they were) i think it's just burn out and a 'been there, done that' feeling, i hardly ever flirt and tart with newbies these days :shock: .
So for now i'll continue my rediscovered interest in 'Vanilla World :shock: ' new job and old friends, pop on here occasionally and maybe make it to the odd munch
You might have noticed i don't post on any of the sites much anymore, probably less in a month than i used to in a day. just can't be arsed and don't find that much interesting, i was looking at the posts earlier and thought 'is that all?'.
I come here for flirtennis with a few friends, to have a quick nose at whats going on and pop in the odd comment here and there. As you've said it's not just this site that fallen on it's arse a little and i think a few of the old bunch have fallen at the same time, just in a slightly different direction.
I don't have any ex's getting married or anything so it can't be that (i wouldn't get upset if they were) i think it's just burn out and a 'been there, done that' feeling, i hardly ever flirt and tart with newbies these days :shock: .
So for now i'll continue my rediscovered interest in 'Vanilla World :shock: ' new job and old friends, pop on here occasionally and maybe make it to the odd munch
Quote by meat2pleaseu
Another lost soul here
You might have noticed i don't post on any of the sites much anymore, probably less in a month than i used to in a day. just can't be arsed and don't find that much interesting, i was looking at the posts earlier and thought 'is that all?'.
I come here for flirtennis with a few friends, to have a quick nose at whats going on and pop in the odd comment here and there. As you've said it's not just this site that fallen on it's arse a little and i think a few of the old bunch have fallen at the same time, just in a slightly different direction.
I don't have any ex's getting married or anything so it can't be that (i wouldn't get upset if they were) i think it's just burn out and a 'been there, done that' feeling, i hardly ever flirt and tart with newbies these days :shock: .
So for now i'll continue my rediscovered interest in 'Vanilla World :shock: ' new job and old friends, pop on here occasionally and maybe make it to the odd munch
i dont think its just a case of the ex hun, but its probably a few things changing at once
yes i had noticed your absence i cant even abuse you on msn cos you arent there
but dont stray too far eh? :twisted:
Sex God
I'll join the lost souls club..if you'll have me 
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
Sex God
Quote by Warmer
I'll join the lost souls club..if you'll have me
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
With that avatar it'll be a pleasure
Double Ohh you haven't lost your flirtiness knack by the way, just thought I'd tell you
Sex God
Quote by meat2pleaseu
I'll join the lost souls club..if you'll have me
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
With that avatar it'll be a pleasure
Double Ohh you haven't lost your flirtiness knack by the way, just thought I'd tell you
as long as we don't have to put an R in front of it!! Quote by meat2pleaseu
I'll join the lost souls club..if you'll have me
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
With that avatar it'll be a pleasure
Double Ohh you haven't lost your flirtiness knack by the way, just thought I'd tell you
Nice to see your handsome bracket back tho meat xx :lol:
Sex God
Quote by jaymar
Nice to see your handsome bracket back tho meat xx
My what?
Sex God
Quote by varca
I'll join the lost souls club..if you'll have me
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
With that avatar it'll be a pleasure
Double Ohh you haven't lost your flirtiness knack by the way, just thought I'd tell you
A pleasure to have you indeed Warmer
So how many have we so far lol? Double Ohh (adding an mmmmmmm here too) :grin: Earthy, me, Warmer, any more for any more? :D When does our first meeting convene and who's looking at the agenda? :DDouble Ohhh Mmmmmm, blush not, tis true
You flirted mightily or is that meatily :D in my opinion as we were chatting for the first time on the phone when I was half naked in a Le Senza changing room :D :giggle:cheers varca..my lost soul is very happy to find somewhere to rest its weary head.. or maybe even dance a jig..watch out it seems to be gaining a life of its own!!it seems to believe all of a sudden :lol: :shock:
earthy my northeastern mate, i know how u are feeling... ive been there lots of times too! Weve travelled all over the UK going to munches and socials and most of the time theyve been amazing. Sometimes, however, ive found myself sitting on the outside looking in and thinking "WTF am i doing here?". It takes a lot of effort and organisation for us to get to some munches and ive sometimes thought why did i bother?? Then the paranoia sets in and i think ok so nobody likes me after all.
Ive noticed that of late the social events have changed and almost become kinda "vanilla". People seem much more guarded and careful. I dont wanna get into that whole "behaviour at a munch" argument so dont go there.. Ive mentioned the change to other people and theyve agreed with me.. its kinda strange.
Ive said in the past "right thats it, im going to take a break" and it lasts ooooo all of two days. I dont work atm so im in this routine of coming on here at certain times of the day (god i sound set in my ways!!).
I know how u feel Earthy, Varca, Fabio and i hope this feeling passes cos i dont like it!!
Suze xx
Ive noticed that of late the social events have changed and almost become kinda "vanilla". People seem much more guarded and careful. I dont wanna get into that whole "behaviour at a munch" argument so dont go there.. Ive mentioned the change to other people and theyve agreed with me.. its kinda strange.
Ive said in the past "right thats it, im going to take a break" and it lasts ooooo all of two days. I dont work atm so im in this routine of coming on here at certain times of the day (god i sound set in my ways!!).
I know how u feel Earthy, Varca, Fabio and i hope this feeling passes cos i dont like it!!
Suze xx
Quote by varca
A pleasure to have you indeed Warmer
Quote by LondonPlaything
never have been one to feel particularly a *part* of things in the first place here...
i said this a while back... can I join?..
what the bejayz Im joining i havent a clue.. but what they hey!
lp
Sex God
Quote by earthchild
....gone are the days when i was that new person everyone wanted to know.....
Well Earthy, at my last two munches (last year) I've spent periods at each hovering near you hoping for a chance to say hallo, but you've been surrounded by others. :cry: But yes, as new people come into any community everyone's place in it evolves.... and other things change it as well.
On the general topic, I've always been on the fringes, so that doesn't seem to change.
I've always enjoyed the (comparatively limited) socialising I've done at munches and on this site, but I've always maintained other interests and other friendships so I've not ever been totally reliant on here.
Also I have never liked the way that some people here use the term "vanilla" and divide folk into "swingers" and "vanillas" - I've always regarded myself as both - I do not recognise boundaries between the two! But maybe I'm going a bit off topic here.
Sex God
Quote by varca
I'll join the lost souls club..if you'll have me
I have felt a distinct lack of belonging anywhere recently.
With that avatar it'll be a pleasure
Double Ohh you haven't lost your flirtiness knack by the way, just thought I'd tell you
A pleasure to have you indeed Warmer
So how many have we so far lol? Double Ohh (adding an mmmmmmm here too) :grin: Earthy, me, Warmer, any more for any more? :D When does our first meeting convene and who's looking at the agenda? :DDouble Ohhh Mmmmmm, blush not, tis true
You flirted mightily or is that meatily :D in my opinion as we were chatting for the first time on the phone when I was half naked in a Le Senza changing room :D :giggle:
cheers varca..my lost soul is very happy to find somewhere to rest its weary head.. or maybe even dance a jig..watch out it seems to be gaining a life of its own!!it seems to believe all of a sudden :lol: :shock:
<---- is told her bosom is a comfy place to rest weary and not so weary heads :grin: As for a jig, that I can do, next munch, save a space on your dance card for me eh? :D Mind you Chooon will recommend that you don't jive with me
:kiss:you are booked in !!
you really haven't seen me dance though have you ??
sweetmotherofthegoddessofthighhighboots!
you really are in for a treat :lol:
Sex God
Quote by varca
A pleasure to have you indeed Warmer
Quote by LondonPlaything
never have been one to feel particularly a *part* of things in the first place here...
i said this a while back... can I join?..
what the bejayz Im joining i havent a clue.. but what they hey!
lp
LP, welcome into the fold of my bosom :rascal:seconded.. welcome to my bosom also :rascal: but lets keep him in the dark for what its all about for a little while hey? :twisted:
I second guess myself all the time Earthy. I always think "Do I belong here? Is all this right for me?"
I gave those feelings a name.....never give something like that a name (some will know it too )....it starts to take over.
When I joined nearly two years ago I didn't know what to expect, or what I wanted from it all. To a degree I still don't. When I lost the internet a while back, all I kept saying to myself was "I can't wait to get back on line, I need to get back on line." But, when I came back the feeling I got from being here wasn't the same. Not necessarily the site, but me. I've evolved. I've had to. I've had to grow up, re evaluate things that I really didn't think I could handle. But I have. It's the only way I could carry on.
The amount of munches.....I have noticed that too. I went to a staggering amount last year, and I was so buzzed up with the thought of meeting so many people. I'm not saying I don't get it anymore, but it's getting weaker. I did tell myself that I really should only go to a couple this year and actually do something about actually swinging, but in typical Dlep/Dollop/Delp etc fashion I haven't kept to it In my case I may have spent so much time learning about swingin, that I haven't spent enough time actually doing....
Earthy, I don't know what to suggest (I don't know what to do in my situation), but I'm sure things will be better for you
I gave those feelings a name.....never give something like that a name (some will know it too
)....it starts to take over.When I joined nearly two years ago I didn't know what to expect, or what I wanted from it all. To a degree I still don't. When I lost the internet a while back, all I kept saying to myself was "I can't wait to get back on line, I need to get back on line." But, when I came back the feeling I got from being here wasn't the same. Not necessarily the site, but me. I've evolved. I've had to. I've had to grow up, re evaluate things that I really didn't think I could handle. But I have. It's the only way I could carry on.
The amount of munches.....I have noticed that too. I went to a staggering amount last year, and I was so buzzed up with the thought of meeting so many people. I'm not saying I don't get it anymore, but it's getting weaker. I did tell myself that I really should only go to a couple this year and actually do something about actually swinging, but in typical Dlep/Dollop/Delp etc fashion I haven't kept to it
In my case I may have spent so much time learning about swingin, that I haven't spent enough time actually doing....Earthy, I don't know what to suggest (I don't know what to do in my situation), but I'm sure things will be better for you
I almost started a thread last week called 'How do you know if its time to give up swinging' 
We've been here three and a half years and have loved every minute of it. We have done what we joined up for but I'm fed up with making plans to swing being so difficult :?
I then decided that maybe for us we should drop back from the site and just stick to the odd night in the club. Together or seperate.
I'm at a stage where I don't know what I want from this site or swinging at the moment, if indeed I want anything.
However I've been in this situation before, just not as bad as this and soon enough someone will come by my pm box, we'll get talking and my opinions on swinging will change, I think :?
As for could I leave SH, right now, yes I could but I am hoping once I am through my exam time and I can have a bit more fun here, that will change
We've been here three and a half years and have loved every minute of it. We have done what we joined up for but I'm fed up with making plans to swing being so difficult :?
I then decided that maybe for us we should drop back from the site and just stick to the odd night in the club. Together or seperate.
I'm at a stage where I don't know what I want from this site or swinging at the moment, if indeed I want anything.
However I've been in this situation before, just not as bad as this and soon enough someone will come by my pm box, we'll get talking and my opinions on swinging will change, I think :?
As for could I leave SH, right now, yes I could but I am hoping once I am through my exam time and I can have a bit more fun here, that will change
Quote by earthchild
you dont belong anymore
its quite strange, been thinking about this a bit lately and sometimes i feel like i dont belong here, i dont mean the site as such, more the scene.
gone are the days when i was that new person everyone wanted to know, which isnt necessarily a bad thing, but even some people i thought were really good friends hardly even speak to me now, they will say a few words on msn if i speak to them then say brb and never come back.
the forums dont excite me anymore, and no thats not a dig at the people posting, i think its more to do with how i am feeling, i dont use them much on either site anymore
i am finding i tend to spend most of my time in the north east chat room with people who are in my area.
i have spent the last 18 months travelling all over the country to meet people, and i have met some fantastic people, one or two who will remain special friends no matter what.
so, is it just me or do others go through this feeling, is it like seasons it changes and goes in circles.
this isnt a look at me post, i am genuinely interested to know if anyone else goes through this phase as i am seriously considering my place here right now.
Earthy xx
I think everyone goes through this Earthy and on any kind of forum, a posting lethargy just starts building up and you get to the point where you can't be bothered to post, often because you've said it all three times before
. Then something happens, a social event, a good topic, interesting new people around and those spark off your enthusiasm again!
But sometimes, the fact that you don't participate makes for a while suddenly makes you feel out of synch with people, it's an odd feeling!
As a newbie..and I'm sure other newbies are the same,I sometimes feel like one of those meerkats (if you've watched the programme ,you know what i'm talking about).The single male lone meerkat who from a distance is watching the established pack of meerkats and is hoping to be accepted in so he can shag the other females,but usually gets chased off with his tale between his legs!!
Apologies to earthy(I'm coming up your way soon )if this is a hijack,i'll gladly accept a 
Apologies to earthy(I'm coming up your way soon
)if this is a hijack,i'll gladly accept a 
Sex God
Quote by Bigpaul45
As a newbie..and I'm sure other newbies are the same,I sometimes feel like one of those meerkats (if you've watched the programme ,you know what i'm talking about).The single male lone meerkat who from a distance is watching the established pack of meerkats and is hoping to be accepted in so he can shag the other females,but usually gets chased off with his tale between his legs!!
Apologies to earthy(I'm coming up your way soon
Oii
:lol: You leave the meerkats alone, flower and her gang are ok, :lol: :lol:
I'm a decidedly irregular poster, though have been a member of this site for some time - as a single male & more recently as couple because wife has become interested (wkd_lady_x), strangely she gets lots more attention and interest than me although she goes in the chat rooms and types fast enough to keep up, so that helps.
Just as a watching outsider though I sometimes wonder why I'm here, we haven't met anyone yet - we intend to but the logistics of arranging a meet (as Dawnie says) around our work lives and a young son make it very difficult, we don't go to clubs (too shy, I'm sure it's ok after the first time).
Often I have a quick look on the site and it bores me, then occasionally I recognise the humour and irreverence which seems to be part of the lifestyle and I realise why I joined in the first place and I don't think that has changed.
I'm at home for a few days at the moment and have been looking at the site daily, and was feeling a bit bored with it today until I saw this post, but perhaps less is more as they say?
Ed.
Just as a watching outsider though I sometimes wonder why I'm here, we haven't met anyone yet - we intend to but the logistics of arranging a meet (as Dawnie says) around our work lives and a young son make it very difficult, we don't go to clubs (too shy, I'm sure it's ok after the first time).
Often I have a quick look on the site and it bores me, then occasionally I recognise the humour and irreverence which seems to be part of the lifestyle and I realise why I joined in the first place and I don't think that has changed.
I'm at home for a few days at the moment and have been looking at the site daily, and was feeling a bit bored with it today until I saw this post, but perhaps less is more as they say?
Ed.
Quote by Suze43
Earthy just a thought - theres loads of peeps going to Chams on Saturday, including us, course u belong hun and dont u dare think otherwise!!
Love ya,
Suze xx
thanks suze it was more the bigger picture i meant than with the people that are good and close friends and special to me, by posting this thread i have upset one very special one in particular by not wording things properly
Earthy xx
