Get a finger in the cat-flaps.
Drinking from the juice-box.
The turtle is touching cloth.
Checking the size of the fury friendship ring.
Making diced carrots.
Praying to the porcelain god.
What are your favourite euphemisms?
Which ones make you giggle?
Which ones make you cringe?
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Euphemisms
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Dining at the Y
and
A picnic in the perfumed garden always make me smile,
but, for the embarrassment factor . . .
I answered the phone one day last year, and the girl calling said "Are you in ? I was just in the area, can I call round for coffee ?
Me "Of course you can, I'll put a fresh pot on for you now"
And I actually did think she was coming for coffee
and
A picnic in the perfumed garden always make me smile,
but, for the embarrassment factor . . .
I answered the phone one day last year, and the girl calling said "Are you in ? I was just in the area, can I call round for coffee ?
Me "Of course you can, I'll put a fresh pot on for you now"
And I actually did think she was coming for coffee
Sex God
Coffee. That reminds me someone said 'Come inside luv.' or did she?
Sex God
Quote by dambuster
I answered the phone one day last year, and the girl calling said "Are you in ? I was just in the area, can I call round for coffee ?
Me "Of course you can, I'll put a fresh pot on for you now"
And I actually did think she was coming for coffee
Oooh shit, it means something else???? :shock:
Quote by Darkfire
there's no wonder blokes look at me gone out when they say 'how do you take it?' and i say 'white, two sugars thanks' :shock:
:doh: knew i was doing something wrong
You could always try "Black and strong" :grin:
Quote by westerross
Oooh shit, it means something else???? :shock:
It did that day.
She came back for a bbq and never bluddy left :shock:
)
Sex God
Shouting for Hughie!
Europe down the pan
Montezuma's revenge
Breaking wind
How do you break wind FFS? (Answers on a postcard please! :lol2: )
Europe down the pan
Montezuma's revenge
Breaking wind
How do you break wind FFS? (Answers on a postcard please! :lol2: ) Sex God
Yesterday a pair of tits came and nibbled my nuts. Then pecked at a slug before swallowing it whole. I moved my hand to open the door for a better look. I think I moved to fast and they both flew off.
~I must put some more seed out today.
~I must put some more seed out today.
Sex God
was just searching for something and some of these made me laugh...Anyone got any more?
in the WWE american wrestling (which my kids love) one of the wrestlers does a move called the 5 knuckle shuffle.......makes me smirk to myslef every time i hear it....often wonder if i should write to them and tell them 
:lol:
hand shandy....yuk
strumming the banjo....cringe
spanking the monkey :lol:
bashing the bishop :lol:
butters slipped of his noodles
cheese has slipped off her cracker!!
:lol:hand shandy....yuk
strumming the banjo....cringe
spanking the monkey :lol:
bashing the bishop :lol:
butters slipped of his noodles
cheese has slipped off her cracker!!
Master of Sex
I was in the kitchen of another member's house recently when she said to me "Would you like to taste my chutney?"
I thought it might be a euphemism - but no, she'd just made a new batch of rhubarb chutney. And very nice it was too!!
I thought it might be a euphemism - but no, she'd just made a new batch of rhubarb chutney. And very nice it was too!!
Sex God
Blowing a kiss (passing wind)
spending a penny
(passing wind) spending a penny
Sexlightened
Quote by Sugar-n-pom
I was in the kitchen of another member's house recently when she said to me "Would you like to taste my chutney?"
I thought it might be a euphemism - but no, she'd just made a new batch of rhubarb chutney. And very nice it was too!!
Oh come on sugar, you'd scored!
The female of a couple, with whom my ex-wife and I had a few 'sessions', lovingly referred to her boyfriend's orgasm as "he's dropped his shopping". I creased up the first time I heard her say that... unfortunately it was right in the middle of a spit roast and regretfully I shrivelled a little bit whilst belly laughing!
little man in the pink poloneck = cock
barking at the ants = puking
yodelling down the big white telephone = puking
gooey at the fork = wetness in the groinal garden area
wetter than an otters pocket = see above
I've regressed to being a schoolboy again. I promise to act a bit more grown up at the Wigan munch!!!!
barking at the ants = puking
yodelling down the big white telephone = puking
gooey at the fork = wetness in the groinal garden area
wetter than an otters pocket = see above
I've regressed to being a schoolboy again. I promise to act a bit more grown up at the Wigan munch!!!!
Sex God
Sorry just discovered this one;
sticking a finger in the dam.
I can only imagine?
sticking a finger in the dam.
I can only imagine?
My friend is retarded with class and thinks nothing of saying to his missus in front of me and others stuff like:
Fancy a bit of hairy tuna bap for breaky luv.
C'mon were leaving early for the boneyard
I want to impale ur extra elasticated hole
Gross but makes me smirk, she must feel a real princess, I suppose hes just saying what im secretly thinking ;)
Fancy a bit of hairy tuna bap for breaky luv.
C'mon were leaving early for the boneyard
I want to impale ur extra elasticated hole
Gross but makes me smirk, she must feel a real princess, I suppose hes just saying what im secretly thinking ;)
Sex God
Here one I just been told
Rooster, as in cock
Which leads to rooster pecking to cat.
do I have to spell it out?
Rooster, as in cock
Which leads to rooster pecking to cat.
do I have to spell it out?
Sex God
Quote by
Here one I just been told
Rooster, as in cock
Which leads to rooster pecking to cat.
do I have to spell it out?
yes
