Eyup love, fancy a shag............?

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

And when I picked myself up from the floor, I thought that maybe, just maybe, my hitting on a girl technique needed a little fine tuning.
If c@rlsberg did chat up lines, it wouldn't be that one.
:laughabove:
Bell :mrgreen:

tweeky

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

Last time we were out on a vanilla night a guy offered Mrs Tweeky a cigarette. On lighting it he said "Fuck later?". Slightly undervalued there I feel, at least two cigarettes lol

Oh, and no we did not :lol:

essex34m

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

I once had "I'm desperate for a shag, how are you fixed?"
I was polite in my refusal, my ego took a right kick in the bollocks.

essex34m

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

Quote by Kaznkev
i hope even if you are fixed you would use a condom!

It's my only unbreakable rule, everything else are guidelines.
<edited for grammar - I wasted my education>

Naughty_Wigan_Couple

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

Quote by essex34m
I once had "I'm desperate for a shag, how are you fixed?"
I was polite in my refusal, my ego took a right kick in the bollocks.

Sorry, but I thought you understood that was my one and only chat up line redface

I will try and be more to the point next time wink

HnS

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
Sorry, but I thought you understood that was my one and only chat up line
I will try and be more to the point next time

Mrs NWC,
fancy a shag ?
flipa

ops:
"I'll get my coat........"

little__gem

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

At least it wasn't broad Yorkshite...
"Eeeeeeeeee, baa gum, tha's bit taaaaaaasty. Faaaaancy furrrrrrrtlin' me fuuuuuurrets laaaater lass? Tha haaaaas a reeet lovely snuggly slippaaaas t'wear n paaaaaape tha can smoke after t'fact, laaaaaak. Wass tha saaaaay?"
;)
lol

LG. x

Sappho

Sex God

0 likes 16 Sep 2010

Quote by little gem
At least it wasn't broad Yorkshite...
"Eeeeeeeeee, baa gum, tha's bit taaaaaaasty. Faaaaancy furrrrrrrtlin' me fuuuuuurrets laaaater lass? Tha haaaaas a reeet lovely snuggly slippaaaas t'wear n paaaaaape tha can smoke after t'fact, laaaaaak. Wass tha saaaaay?"
;)
LG. x

Eeeeeh, tha's lookshoery, that. Get tha knickers off, then. Oh, and take tha cap off an' all. Leave tha socks on.
xxx

Unknown User

0 likes 17 Sep 2010

hmmmm dont know whether to be offended by above two comments :twisted:
we av class up in yorkshire dunt tha knows lol

neilinleeds

Sex God

0 likes 17 Sep 2010

Don't be too hard on Gem Trixie. She's from Lancashire tha knos, and still struggling to come to terms wi' t'fact that everything she were ever taught as a nipper about which side o' t'pennines were t'right side were wrong. ;)
Sappho, you had me scratching me 'ead there for a minute with the lookshoery thing. Thought it was some strange dialect I'd not yet come across. confused

I had to say it out loud once or twice but the penny dropped in the end! lol

BTW, just for the avoidance of doubt I have never once used 'fancy furtling me ferrets love' as a chat up line. I'm not sure using a filthy, furry, smelly little beast as a euphemism for me nads would be much in the way of a winning strategy? dunno

N x x x ;)

vampanya

Orgasminator

0 likes 17 Sep 2010

Quote by neilinleeds
Don't be too hard on Gem Trixie. She's from Lancashire tha knos, and still struggling to come to terms wi' t'fact that everything she were ever taught as a nipper about which side o' t'pennines were t'right side were wrong. ;)
Sappho, you had me scratching me 'ead there for a minute with the lookshoery thing. Thought it was some strange dialect I'd not yet come across. I had to say it out loud once or twice but the penny dropped in the end!
BTW, just for the avoidance of doubt I have never once used 'fancy furtling me ferrets love' as a chat up line. I'm not sure using a filthy, furry, smelly little beast as a euphemism for me nads would be much in the way of a winning strategy?
N x x x ;)

Eyup! I've never heard that one either... :lol: Mind you, I'm shacked up wi' a southern shandy pants n 'es never even seen a ferret let alone furtled one!

tweeky

Sex God

0 likes 17 Sep 2010

You remind me of a parking ticket!
You have fine written all over you
bolt

Sappho

Sex God

0 likes 17 Sep 2010

Apologies to both Trixie kiss

and Neil :kiss: - absolutely no offence intended. I just had a Monty Python moment. They come upon me of a sudden.
And now for something completely different...
Sappho x

little__gem

Sex God

0 likes 18 Sep 2010

Well Sappho, I found it quite hilarious. Especially the bit where Nellie actually googled "lookshoery" to see what it meant!
:giggle:

Quote by neilinleeds
BTW, just for the avoidance of doubt I have never once used 'fancy furtling me ferrets love' as a chat up line. I'm not sure using a filthy, furry, smelly little beast as a euphemism for me nads would be much in the way of a winning strategy?

You told me they wouldn't smell, and they do. They reek! ;) Now I'll leave you all to wonder whether I mean Neil's nads or ferrets! lol

Trixie, I know there is class in Yorkshite, but not in our house! :lol: Usually the posh-est we get in here is when he says excuse me after farting in the bath to try to replicate that jacuzzi feeling at home without the cost! Don't even ask him about wafting the smells around as if it was aromatherapy. confused

And I supposedly come from the 'wrong' side of the pennines, eh? ;)
:lol: kiss

LG. x

Unknown User

0 likes 18 Sep 2010

its ok i was only jesting anyway, no offense taken, at the end of the day we all take the piss out of each others accents but i must say in all my years in yorkshire no ones ever asked me to fettle their ferret lol

little__gem

Sex God

0 likes 18 Sep 2010

There is always a first time! :rascal:
:giggle:
I might try it at the next munch / club meet / social we go to, see how it runs out as a genuine chat up line!

Dirtygirly

Sex God

0 likes 18 Sep 2010

And while we're on about accents... Bury is pronounced Bury. It's not Berry - those are things you eat! rolleyes