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for the ladies

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Lord.
Before I lay down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep.
One who's handsome, smart and strong, One who's willy is thick and long.
Oh send send me a man who makes love to my mind, knows just what to say to " How big is my behind?"
And as I kneel and pray by my bed, I look at the wanker you sent me instead. Amen
worship
A Woman's Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for:
Wisdom, To understand a man
Love, To forgive him and
Patience, For his moods
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength
I'll just beat him to death.
:laughabove: :laughabove:
Brilliant
Shireen
xxx
SINGLE WOMAN'S PRAYER
Now I lay me down to sleep.
Please don't send me no more creeps.
Please just send me one good man.
One without a wedding band.
One good man who's sweet as pie.
Who brushed his teeth and doesn't lie.
Who dresses neat and doesn't smell.
And is sexy like my man Denzel.
Man, if I should die before I wake,
that would truly take the cake;
No matrimony or honeymoon.
No fancy reception planned for June.
No throwing of the wedding bouquet.
Please, God, don't let me go out that way.
If I die before I meet Mr. Right
I won't go out without a fight.
But then again with my luck,
He'd probably be just some schmuck.
The single life is not that bad
I know it's just a passing fad.
I won't be blue. I will not frown.
Besides, I like my toilet seat down.
No more makeup, won't comb my hair.
So never mind this stupid prayer.
The single life will do just fine.
So what's up, girlfriend?
IT'S PARTY TIME!!!!
or
Dear Lord...
So far today, I am doing all right.
I have not gossiped, lost my temper, been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or self indulgent.
I have not whined, bitched, cursed, or eaten any chocolate.
I have not charged on my credit card.
However, I am going to get out of bed in a few minutes, and I will need a lot more help after that.
Amen.
hehehehehehehehehehehe!!!!!!! rotflmao
v. v. funny rotflmao