Wilma.....
......The only woman who when cooking a pizza cannot understand remove all packaging on a pizza and leaves a polystyrene base underneath.
......The only woman who makes a sauce using a packet 2 years out of date
......The only woman who makes a chocolate cake so dry that it takes 4 pints of water to make it moist enough to eat
.......The only woman who plugs in a plug removed to isolate a mains supply and tries to electrocute me
....The only woman who turns up the voltage on a muscle stimulating machine so that sparks dance across my chest
All in the vain attempt to try and kill me - but just too tough for you hun!
The blonde roots go deeper than you think!
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Fred has been a naughty boy!
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Quote by Flintstones
Wilma.....
......The only woman who when cooking a pizza cannot understand remove all packaging on a pizza and leaves a polystyrene base underneath.
......The only woman who makes a sauce using a packet 2 years out of date
......The only woman who makes a chocolate cake so dry that it takes 4 pints of water to make it moist enough to eat
.......The only woman who plugs in a plug removed to isolate a mains supply and tries to electrocute me
....The only woman who turns up the voltage on a muscle stimulating machine so that sparks dance across my chest
All in the vain attempt to try and kill me - but just too tough for you hun!
The blonde roots go deeper than you think!
So we are raking up the past 14 years then Fred!!!
Let me see what I can come up with
PBFH
:twisted:
Quote by Flintstones
Wilma.....
......The only woman who when cooking a pizza cannot understand remove all packaging on a pizza and leaves a polystyrene base underneath.
......The only woman who makes a sauce using a packet 2 years out of date
......The only woman who makes a chocolate cake so dry that it takes 4 pints of water to make it moist enough to eat
.......The only woman who plugs in a plug removed to isolate a mains supply and tries to electrocute me
....The only woman who turns up the voltage on a muscle stimulating machine so that sparks dance across my chest
All in the vain attempt to try and kill me - but just too tough for you hun!
Did you not notice that all these things were done to rid myself of YOU!!!
Wilma
Quote by Flintstones
Right!
Seem to have subdued the girlies for tonight!
I'm off to bed!
Same time - same place tomorrow girlies - or are you busy having your hair done again?
Steve - cheers! See you tomorrow!
*ambles off whistling tunelessly - knowing that pisses of the girlies as well!*
Make your way to the SPARE ROOM !!!
Wilma
Fred consider this:
1) Wilma IS going to get better and you will be in soooooooo much trouble :twisted: eating a polythene base will be the least of your problems
2) Jags & Kit - surrender now they'll eat you alive even with a doiley on your bottom. These women look expert at destroying lippy men.
3) You know Steve's going to run so noone can lift his skirt up :lol: and you'll be all on your own :P
4) A wide selection of whips and instructions on their way to Wilma. :twisted:
5) All the beer in the world won't numb the pain
All my love
Jas
XXX
There was a swinger named Fred
His wife was poorly in bed
She was feeling so sick
and he gave her a kick
so the room yelled "Off with his head" :twisted:
1) Wilma IS going to get better and you will be in soooooooo much trouble :twisted: eating a polythene base will be the least of your problems
2) Jags & Kit - surrender now they'll eat you alive even with a doiley on your bottom. These women look expert at destroying lippy men.
3) You know Steve's going to run so noone can lift his skirt up :lol: and you'll be all on your own :P
4) A wide selection of whips and instructions on their way to Wilma. :twisted:
5) All the beer in the world won't numb the pain
All my love
Jas
XXX
There was a swinger named Fred
His wife was poorly in bed
She was feeling so sick
and he gave her a kick
so the room yelled "Off with his head" :twisted:
Quote by tim-jas
There was a swinger named Fred
His wife was poorly in bed
She was feeling so sick
and he gave her a kick
so the room yelled "Off with his head" :twisted:
Ooohhhhhh - poetry - scary stuff! - Duck Steve - this might hurt!
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha
We have them on the run now!
Fearless Fred
Ooohhhhhh - poetry - scary stuff! - Duck Steve - this might hurt!
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha
We have them on the run now!
I can't ruin my saintliness being too nasty
, i am however, prepared to roll up my sleeves just this once and start getting very abusive with the toys knowing how curious you both are in these matters :twisted: :twisted: Oh and look, I 
have a design for a contraption to hold you in. Fred, so thoughtful of you to provide the the ideas for the instruments of your doom. 
I'll take this one fred!!
I've just won at Doms and youv'e got no chance
Quote by Sappho
Fred, my angel........
Wishful thinking "darling" - still got me boots on - alive and kicking!
I got this one Steve
Sappho - do you have the same hairdresser as Kit?
No?
Jeez - must be sisters then! :doh:
Here put this hat on - can't fight you whilst i'm laughing!
Fearless Fred (FF)
It is the fate of women to always be the late comer, unless you have a kind, considerate, attentive, fulfilling, orgasmic man like the lovely Kat to make you purr.
Men for you, do their stuff then leave you to finish off on your own! Thank Heaven I am getting a Rabbit for Christmas (Hint for Kat)
I don't think your paying as much attention as you think - best build the hutch
Kat,
Any chance of you getting off the fence and lending a hand here? All you gonna do up there is get splinters in your arse!
You are too deep in it now to stay sat up there anyway - first you forget to say summat about her hair and then you forget what she wants for Xmas!
Guess you had better build a hutch big enough for yourself!
Fred
Any chance of you getting off the fence and lending a hand here? All you gonna do up there is get splinters in your arse!
You are too deep in it now to stay sat up there anyway - first you forget to say summat about her hair and then you forget what she wants for Xmas!
Guess you had better build a hutch big enough for yourself!
Fred
Sex God
Dammit!! Give myself a night off from the Forum and look what happens? I miss one of the busiest and best nights for ages!!
Not that I would have been much help to either Fred or Steve because:
a) Far too fond of all the ladies in this thread to insult them (and yes, Fred, I do mean 'fond' and not 'scared').
b) Even if I wasn't fond of them I was brought up to be nice to people - especially the fairer sex. We have a LONG history of chivalry in my family.
c) Hadn't heard about the insults v. penis size thing before until Kit mentioned it. Now that I have, I am very glad that I am not prone to insults.
Phew!
d) You asked for it! Sorry, but having carefully weighed all the evidence you definitely provoked them so, in all fairness, we should truss you up like a turkey and hand you over.
Mind you, the thread made good reading and I am only jealous that I wasn't here to join in.
I sense that bluexxx is greasing up her biggest strapon even as we speak. :twisted: :twisted: At least, you'd better hope that she is greasing it up - because it's going to hurt like hell otherwise!!!! :shock:
Still pissed that I missed all this last night!!!
Not that I would have been much help to either Fred or Steve because:
a) Far too fond of all the ladies in this thread to insult them (and yes, Fred, I do mean 'fond' and not 'scared').
b) Even if I wasn't fond of them I was brought up to be nice to people - especially the fairer sex. We have a LONG history of chivalry in my family.
c) Hadn't heard about the insults v. penis size thing before until Kit mentioned it. Now that I have, I am very glad that I am not prone to insults.
Phew!d) You asked for it! Sorry, but having carefully weighed all the evidence you definitely provoked them so, in all fairness, we should truss you up like a turkey and hand you over.
Mind you, the thread made good reading and I am only jealous that I wasn't here to join in.
I sense that bluexxx is greasing up her biggest strapon even as we speak. :twisted: :twisted: At least, you'd better hope that she is greasing it up - because it's going to hurt like hell otherwise!!!! :shock:
Still pissed that I missed all this last night!!!
Wait just a minute!
I was going along quite well with the thought that it was Jags - then the bi male thing crept in and drew level and started to make me sweat! Now it looks like Bluexxx is creeping up on the inside here and I am definitely getting the collywobbles!
Can someone just keep her out of the other thread until we have subdued the girlies - won't take long!
Fred
I was going along quite well with the thought that it was Jags - then the bi male thing crept in and drew level and started to make me sweat! Now it looks like Bluexxx is creeping up on the inside here and I am definitely getting the collywobbles!
Can someone just keep her out of the other thread until we have subdued the girlies - won't take long!
Fred
Quote by Flintstones
Wait just a minute!
I was going along quite well with the thought that it was Jags - then the bi male thing crept in and drew level and started to make me sweat! Now it looks like Bluexxx is creeping up on the inside here and I am definitely getting the collywobbles!
Can someone just keep her out of the other thread until we have subdued the girlies - won't take long!
Fred
I don't need to use a strap-on to subdue Fred - though I have to concede he does deserve it and I could make a fortune from selling the tickets to view!! Now there's a thought.................
