Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
Fuckbuddies, partners or soulmates
Sex God
I suppose the point is - do you both see this new dynamic in the relation the same? If so - it doesn't matter what it's called - it is what works for you.
If you don't - what will you do about it?
I do feel there is a fixed assumption about what a 'functional' relationship looks like and those that don't look like that should be aiming to get like it.
But when it comes down to it, if the people involved (kids too) are ok with it then it IS a functional relationship.
So whatever it is, whatever happens, I hope it all works out for you all.
If you don't - what will you do about it?
I do feel there is a fixed assumption about what a 'functional' relationship looks like and those that don't look like that should be aiming to get like it.
But when it comes down to it, if the people involved (kids too) are ok with it then it IS a functional relationship.
So whatever it is, whatever happens, I hope it all works out for you all.
I was part of a couple that lived separately, works well if you want it to! It didn't work out for me eventually but I know of couples where it has and still does work. I quite liked it as you have your own space etc...
So yes, I would still class you as a couple/partners or whatever you wish to call it.....its about what makes you both and children happy!
So yes, I would still class you as a couple/partners or whatever you wish to call it.....its about what makes you both and children happy!
Sex God
A couple who live apart?
Me and the significant other - Dek live apart it isnt feasable (sp) for us to live together in lots of ways, However when he isnt working abroad he spends quite a bit of time here. :twisted:
It gets to a point where we both miss our own company and space and do start to nag a little, meaning we are both ready for him to go away again, not sure what would happen if we didnt have that time apart as its never happened hes always worked away but it does keep it special and fresh all said and done though it works for us we rarely argue so were quite happy to carry on until something changes. Call it what you like as long as your both happy with the arrangement.
Me and the significant other - Dek live apart it isnt feasable (sp) for us to live together in lots of ways, However when he isnt working abroad he spends quite a bit of time here. :twisted:
It gets to a point where we both miss our own company and space and do start to nag a little, meaning we are both ready for him to go away again, not sure what would happen if we didnt have that time apart as its never happened hes always worked away but it does keep it special and fresh all said and done though it works for us we rarely argue so were quite happy to carry on until something changes. Call it what you like as long as your both happy with the arrangement.
It sounds to me that you are a couple who love each other but are equally strong-willed and haven't found a way to compromise about some issues that are important to you both. Living apart doesn't change how you feel about another person, and children grow up and start to make their own decisions about what is right for them.
So I'd say you were a couple and will remain one unless one of you chooses otherwise before you find a way to resolve your issues, or the issues resolve themselves.
So I'd say you were a couple and will remain one unless one of you chooses otherwise before you find a way to resolve your issues, or the issues resolve themselves.
Sex God
Quote by flower411
So .. what are we ??
A couple, who live apart ??
Significant others ??
Fuckbuddies ?? !! :shock:
Or just soulmates who have such strong views about unrelated stuff that we should just live in different houses and stop bloody whining !!
Does it matter as long as everyone involved, is happy?
Just another label, isn't it?
Sex God
Quote by Freckledbird
So .. what are we ??
A couple, who live apart ??
Significant others ??
Fuckbuddies ?? !! :shock:
Or just soulmates who have such strong views about unrelated stuff that we should just live in different houses and stop bloody whining !!
Does it matter as long as everyone involved, is happy?
Just another label, isn't it?
Totally agree with FB here! What does the label matter? You're happy it won't change anything.
i have always thought that one of the things that determines the strength of any "loving" relationship is the couples unshakeable desire to be is the love that keeps you wanting to live, eat, breathe, fuck etc together... no-matter all know the feeling--- its called " being in love"
We all know that relationships take a great deal of effort. When things break down much of it is because neither of you are prepared to make as much effort as is needed.
the desire to part/not try wholeheartedly to be together is an indicator... to me at least... that the love/infatuation has gone or maybe isnt there or strong enough to begin with.
As we all know... there needs to be equality in feelings for a relationship to continue and reach blossoming , mature levels.
personally i think any desire to part is the beginning of the end.
Of course, ties might exist that are hard to break... but whenever i have been in a situation where this "infatuation" has gone... i have let things go and moved on.
We all know that relationships take a great deal of effort. When things break down much of it is because neither of you are prepared to make as much effort as is needed.
the desire to part/not try wholeheartedly to be together is an indicator... to me at least... that the love/infatuation has gone or maybe isnt there or strong enough to begin with.
As we all know... there needs to be equality in feelings for a relationship to continue and reach blossoming , mature levels.
personally i think any desire to part is the beginning of the end.
Of course, ties might exist that are hard to break... but whenever i have been in a situation where this "infatuation" has gone... i have let things go and moved on.
We are a 'couple that live apart' mainly through work but also from personal choice, as has been mentioned by other people before, we like our personal space to be able to be our own person & relax in our own surroundings.
In honesty Chelle found the idea of living apart quite difficult to comprehend & still does at times, no long term plans to look forward to & plan for, although in reality we too know that we could never live together on a day to day basis without killing each other.
We see each other most weekends & try to make the most of the time we spend together which in itself is difficult with 4 children between us.
To be honest flower as long as you are both still committed to each other & love & respect that person & can be there for them when your needed then it really does not matter what label you want to put on yourselves or anyone else for that matter.
Be happy!!!
oh n btw read your 'oh bugger' post yup that happened to us after last years 'family holiday' too
In honesty Chelle found the idea of living apart quite difficult to comprehend & still does at times, no long term plans to look forward to & plan for, although in reality we too know that we could never live together on a day to day basis without killing each other.
We see each other most weekends & try to make the most of the time we spend together which in itself is difficult with 4 children between us.
To be honest flower as long as you are both still committed to each other & love & respect that person & can be there for them when your needed then it really does not matter what label you want to put on yourselves or anyone else for that matter.
Be happy!!!
oh n btw read your 'oh bugger' post yup that happened to us after last years 'family holiday' too
I'm looking at this from the perspective of the child. My Mum split with my Dad when I was 3 and tried hard to keep us in our Father's life, where he wasn't really that fussed.
He would come round on a Sunday and eat a roast dinner with us, spend some time with us and then *poof* vanish with no explanation. After the 2nd and 3rd time of this happening we realised it was due to dating.
Why am I telling you this? Whatever you decide, whatever you do. Let them know that you will spend regular time with them, don't just visit to see your partner and don't one day disappear because it hasn't worked out. They like I did, could blame themselves for you not being around, they could be hoping you will come back home when they see that you are spending happy times with your partner.
I hope that you work it out and that you are able to come to the right decision that works for everyone. Children love their parents unconditionally and will be happy if you are, but do include them where possible.
He would come round on a Sunday and eat a roast dinner with us, spend some time with us and then *poof* vanish with no explanation. After the 2nd and 3rd time of this happening we realised it was due to dating.
Why am I telling you this? Whatever you decide, whatever you do. Let them know that you will spend regular time with them, don't just visit to see your partner and don't one day disappear because it hasn't worked out. They like I did, could blame themselves for you not being around, they could be hoping you will come back home when they see that you are spending happy times with your partner.
I hope that you work it out and that you are able to come to the right decision that works for everyone. Children love their parents unconditionally and will be happy if you are, but do include them where possible.
Quote by
I know a guy, not his wife. They have spilt the house, they live their own lives and they get together for sex. He would never cheat on her. It works for them, so what the hell?
it might work for them.... but are they really getting all that they can out of a "relationship"?
it strikes me that this couple simply use eachother for sex. personally , id find it an insult if someone that i once shared everything with only wanted this from me.
isnt it possible, that with someone else, they might achieve something better?
Sex God
Quote by DeeCee
I know a guy, not his wife. They have spilt the house, they live their own lives and they get together for sex. He would never cheat on her. It works for them, so what the hell?
it might work for them.... but are they really getting all that they can out of a "relationship"?
it strikes me that this couple simply use eachother for sex. personally , id find it an insult if someone that i once shared everything with only wanted this from me.
isnt it possible, that with someone else, they might achieve something better?
If it suits them then yes. They have come up with something that works for them. That's all that matters.
:? :? Quote by bbw_lover
I know a guy, not his wife. They have spilt the house, they live their own lives and they get together for sex. He would never cheat on her. It works for them, so what the hell?
it might work for them.... but are they really getting all that they can out of a "relationship"?
it strikes me that this couple simply use eachother for sex. personally , id find it an insult if someone that i once shared everything with only wanted this from me.
isnt it possible, that with someone else, they might achieve something better?
If it suits them then yes. They have come up with something that works for them. That's all that matters.
:? :?in a way you are right...
personally i wouldnt settle for second best.
each to their own i guess.
so bbw-Lover, tell me what you would prefer..a relationship like the above--- where you love someone so much that you only have sex with sex but cant be together....
or a relationship where you never want to be apart?
Sex God
Quote by DeeCee
I know a guy, not his wife. They have spilt the house, they live their own lives and they get together for sex. He would never cheat on her. It works for them, so what the hell?
it might work for them.... but are they really getting all that they can out of a "relationship"?
it strikes me that this couple simply use eachother for sex. personally , id find it an insult if someone that i once shared everything with only wanted this from me.
isnt it possible, that with someone else, they might achieve something better?
If it suits them then yes. They have come up with something that works for them. That's all that matters.
:? :?in a way you are right...
personally i wouldnt settle for second best.
each to their own i guess.
so bbw-Lover, tell me what you would prefer..a relationship like the above--- where you love someone so much that you only have sex with sex but cant be together....
or a relationship where you never want to be apart?
It really depends on the people involved DeeCee. One type of relationship with one person won't work with another person. It's all to do with chemistry and where you are at that moment in time.
Personally I've found that with different people a different type of relationship will come about. I couldn't say that one is right and another is wrong!!?? Each situation and each combination of personalities and personality types creates a different outcome surely.
:D :D Quote by bbw_lover
I know a guy, not his wife. They have spilt the house, they live their own lives and they get together for sex. He would never cheat on her. It works for them, so what the hell?
it might work for them.... but are they really getting all that they can out of a "relationship"?
it strikes me that this couple simply use eachother for sex. personally , id find it an insult if someone that i once shared everything with only wanted this from me.
isnt it possible, that with someone else, they might achieve something better?
If it suits them then yes. They have come up with something that works for them. That's all that matters.
:? :?in a way you are right...
personally i wouldnt settle for second best.
each to their own i guess.
so bbw-Lover, tell me what you would prefer..a relationship like the above--- where you love someone so much that you only have sex with sex but cant be together....
or a relationship where you never want to be apart?
It really depends on the people involved DeeCee. One type of relationship with one person won't work with another person. It's all to do with chemistry and where you are at that moment in time.
Personally I've found that with different people a different type of relationship will come about. I couldn't say that one is right and another is wrong!!?? Each situation and each combination of personalities and personality types creates a different outcome surely.
:D :DI find it odd, but is it any different than a couple who live a mile apart and just can not move in together. I think it is comfortable for them.Sometime W and I sit in different rooms watching different TV, she likes football. I know she could record it, but then someone could tell her the results.
