Haven't heard this in years.....who remembers The Voice of The Beehive?
he's making all these promises you know he cannot keep
he made me pick him up now he won't pay for gasoline
he's drinking all my beers he's wearing all my clothes
and if he winks at me again i think i'll take him home
chorus
there's a barbarian in the back of my car, oh no
there's a barbarian yeh yeh yeh in the back of my car
he's started all my worries and he's finished all my wine
he's giving me a headache but i still think he's divine
he says he has a question, he starts tugging at my clothes
would i be good enough to take him to his girlfriend's
home ?
chorus
some boys go by plane and others go by sea
he'll go anywhere with anyone just as long as it's for free
chorus
he's got his eyes on the horizon
he says i can ride his rocket
while telephone numbers are tumbling from his top
pocket
dream logic operator he falls out of the car
he says i'll fuck you later now just get me to the bar.
Lyrics > Voice of the Beehive Lyrics > Voice of the Beehive There's a Barbarian in the Back of My Car Lyrics
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GFZ - Karaoke Night
Because I need cheering up tonight and this reminds me of my Dad
:karaoke:
Bring me Sunshine, in your smile,
Bring me Laughter, all the while,
In this world where we live, there should be more happiness,
So much joy you can give, to each brand new bright tomorrow,
Make me happy, through the years,
Never bring me, any tears,
Let your arms be as warm as the sun from up above,
Bring me fun, bring me sunshine, bring me love.
Bring me Sunshine, in your eyes,
Bring me rainbows, from the skies,
Life's too short to be spent having anything but fun,
We can be so content, if we gather little sunbeams,
Be light-hearted, all day long,
Keep me singing, happy songs,
Let your arms be as warm as the sun from up above,
Bring me fun, bring me sunshine, bring me love.
:cry:
:karaoke:
Bring me Sunshine, in your smile,
Bring me Laughter, all the while,
In this world where we live, there should be more happiness,
So much joy you can give, to each brand new bright tomorrow,
Make me happy, through the years,
Never bring me, any tears,
Let your arms be as warm as the sun from up above,
Bring me fun, bring me sunshine, bring me love.
Bring me Sunshine, in your eyes,
Bring me rainbows, from the skies,
Life's too short to be spent having anything but fun,
We can be so content, if we gather little sunbeams,
Be light-hearted, all day long,
Keep me singing, happy songs,
Let your arms be as warm as the sun from up above,
Bring me fun, bring me sunshine, bring me love.
:cry:
Sex God
So is the bar open then, or the jacuzzi?
Mod
A song from the ICON that is Rolf Harris 
Two little swingers had two little toys
Each had a Blow up doll
Gaily they played each summers day
Swingers both of course
One little chap then had a mishap
Broke off his dollies leg
Wept for his toy, then cried with joy
As his young playmate said
Did you think I would leave you crying
When there's room in my doll for two
Climb up here, Jack and don't be crying
I can shag just as fast with two
When we grow up we'll both be soldiers
And our dollies will not be rubber ringers
And I wonder if we'll remember when we were
Two little swingers
Long years past, war came so fast
Bravely they marched away
Cannon roared loud and in the mad crowd
Wounded and dying lay, up goes a shout
A horse dashes out, out from the ranks so blue
Gallops away to where Joe lay, then came a voice he knew
Did you think I would leave you dying
When there's room in my doll for two
Climb up here, Joe we'll soon be shagging
I can ride just as fast with two
Did you say Joe I'm all a tremble, perhaps it's the tuggers fingers
But I think its that I remember when we were two little swingers
Do you think I would leave you dying
There's room in my doll for two
Climb up here, Joe we'll soon be shagging
Back to the ranks so blue
Can you feel Joe I'm all a tremble, perhaps it's the tuggers fingers
But I think its that I remember when we were two little swingers
woo
Two little swingers had two little toys
Each had a Blow up doll
Gaily they played each summers day
Swingers both of course
One little chap then had a mishap
Broke off his dollies leg
Wept for his toy, then cried with joy
As his young playmate said
Did you think I would leave you crying
When there's room in my doll for two
Climb up here, Jack and don't be crying
I can shag just as fast with two
When we grow up we'll both be soldiers
And our dollies will not be rubber ringers
And I wonder if we'll remember when we were
Two little swingers
Long years past, war came so fast
Bravely they marched away
Cannon roared loud and in the mad crowd
Wounded and dying lay, up goes a shout
A horse dashes out, out from the ranks so blue
Gallops away to where Joe lay, then came a voice he knew
Did you think I would leave you dying
When there's room in my doll for two
Climb up here, Joe we'll soon be shagging
I can ride just as fast with two
Did you say Joe I'm all a tremble, perhaps it's the tuggers fingers
But I think its that I remember when we were two little swingers
Do you think I would leave you dying
There's room in my doll for two
Climb up here, Joe we'll soon be shagging
Back to the ranks so blue
Can you feel Joe I'm all a tremble, perhaps it's the tuggers fingers
But I think its that I remember when we were two little swingers
woo
Sex God
Quote by Kiss
:karaoke: :karaoke: :karaoke:
You'll remember me when the west wind moves
Upon the fields of barley....
I prefer the Yorkshire version:
Fields of Barnsley.
Sex God
Quote by LondonPlaything
sing along
lp
Long live Punk Rock
:karaoke: :karaoke:
It was on the good ship Venus
By Christ, ya shoulda seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
And the mast was a mammoth penis
The captain of this lugger
He was a dirty bugger
He wasn't fit to shovel shit
From one place to another
Chorus:
Friggin' in the riggin'
Friggin' in the riggin'
Friggin' in the riggin'
There was fuck all else to do
The captains name was Morgan
By Christ, he was a gorgon
Ten times a day sweet tunes he'd play
On his fuckin' organ
The first mate's name was Cooper
By Christ he was a trooper.
He jerked and jerked until he worked
Himself into a stupor
Chorus
The second mate was Andy
By Christ, he had a dandy
Till they crushed his cock with a jagged rock
For cumming in the brandy
The cabin boy was Flipper
He was a fuckin' nipper
So he stuffed his ass with broken glass
And circumcised the skipper
Chorus
The Captain's wife was Mabel
To fuck she was not able
So the dirty shits, they nailed her tits
Across the barroom table
The Captain had a daughter
Who fell in deep sea water
Delighted squeals revealed that eels
Had found 'er sexual quarters
Steve you have just brought back memories of a distant youth :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:
Time for some Ivor Biggun then...
"My mother said that I never should
play with the naughty rude girls in the wood
their giggling talk I could never understand
and that's why I fell in love with my right hand...
and that's why..
I'm a wanker.
I'm a wanker.
And it does me good like it bloody well should
I'm a wanker.
I'm a wanker and I'm always pulling my pud.
Here, listen..
OH mrs Palm and her five lovely daughters
thank you for having me and being oh so kind
I've got pains in my arms and my dong is growing shorter
my knees have turned to water
and I think I'm going blind.
I've wanked over italy
I've wanked over spain.
i've wanked in an omnibus
I've even had a wank in a train
I've used a badger, and a melon, and a cat
An inflatable linda lovelace and a davy crockett hat..
and that's why
Time for some Ivor Biggun then...
"My mother said that I never should
play with the naughty rude girls in the wood
their giggling talk I could never understand
and that's why I fell in love with my right hand...
and that's why..
I'm a wanker.
I'm a wanker.
And it does me good like it bloody well should
I'm a wanker.
I'm a wanker and I'm always pulling my pud.
Here, listen..
OH mrs Palm and her five lovely daughters
thank you for having me and being oh so kind
I've got pains in my arms and my dong is growing shorter
my knees have turned to water
and I think I'm going blind.
I've wanked over italy
I've wanked over spain.
i've wanked in an omnibus
I've even had a wank in a train
I've used a badger, and a melon, and a cat
An inflatable linda lovelace and a davy crockett hat..
and that's why
Sex God
I knew a man Bojangles
And he danced for you
In worn out shoes
With silver hair, a ragged shirt
And baggy pants, the old soft shoe
He jumped so high, he jumped so high
Then he lightly touched down
I met him in a cell in New Orleans
I was down and out
He looked at me to be the eyes of age
As he spoke right out
He talked of life, he talked of life
He laughed, slapped his leg a step
He said his name, Bojangles
And he danced a lick across the cell
He grabbed his pants
in fettered stance
Oh, he jumped up high
Then he clicked his heels
He let go a laugh, he let go a laugh
Shook back his clothes all around
Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles
Mr. Bojangles, dance!
He danced for those
At minstrel shows and county fairs
Throughout the south
He spoke with tears of 15 years
How his dog and him traveled about
His dog up and died, he up and died
After 20 years he still grieves
He said I dance now
At every chance in honky tonks
For drink and tips
But most of the time
I spend behind these county bars
Cause I drinks a bit
He shook his head
And as he shook his head
I heard someone ask him
Please, please
Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles
Mr. Bojangles, dance!
:karaoke: :karaoke: :karaoke:
And he danced for you
In worn out shoes
With silver hair, a ragged shirt
And baggy pants, the old soft shoe
He jumped so high, he jumped so high
Then he lightly touched down
I met him in a cell in New Orleans
I was down and out
He looked at me to be the eyes of age
As he spoke right out
He talked of life, he talked of life
He laughed, slapped his leg a step
He said his name, Bojangles
And he danced a lick across the cell
He grabbed his pants
in fettered stance
Oh, he jumped up high
Then he clicked his heels
He let go a laugh, he let go a laugh
Shook back his clothes all around
Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles
Mr. Bojangles, dance!
He danced for those
At minstrel shows and county fairs
Throughout the south
He spoke with tears of 15 years
How his dog and him traveled about
His dog up and died, he up and died
After 20 years he still grieves
He said I dance now
At every chance in honky tonks
For drink and tips
But most of the time
I spend behind these county bars
Cause I drinks a bit
He shook his head
And as he shook his head
I heard someone ask him
Please, please
Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles
Mr. Bojangles, dance!
:karaoke: :karaoke: :karaoke:
Cherish the light for us,
Don't let the shadows hold back the dawn.
Cold city lights glowing,
The traffic of life is flowing,
Out over the rivers and on into dark.
I'm going down town where there's music,
I'm going where voices fill the air,
Maybe there's someone waiting for me
With a smile and a flower in her hair
I'm going down town where there's people
The loneliness hangs in the air.
With no-one there real waiting for me,
No smile, no flower nowhere.
A beautiful song by Richard Hawley
Don't let the shadows hold back the dawn.
Cold city lights glowing,
The traffic of life is flowing,
Out over the rivers and on into dark.
I'm going down town where there's music,
I'm going where voices fill the air,
Maybe there's someone waiting for me
With a smile and a flower in her hair
I'm going down town where there's people
The loneliness hangs in the air.
With no-one there real waiting for me,
No smile, no flower nowhere.
A beautiful song by Richard Hawley
Sex God
This is the only song that has ever made me cry, made me cry despite the fact that i've done my best to be so strong about the way ive been feeling this past year.
"I Just Called To Say I Love You"
No New Year's Day to celebrate
No chocolate covered candy hearts to give away
No first of spring
No song to sing
In fact here's just another ordinary day
No April rain
No flowers bloom
No wedding Saturday within the month of June
But what it is, is something true
Made up of these three words that I must say to you
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart
No summer's high
No warm July
No harvest moon to light one tender August night
No autumn breeze
No falling leaves
Not even time for birds to fly to southern skies
No Libra sun
No Halloween
No giving thanks to all the Christmas joy you bring
But what it is, though old so new
To fill your heart like no three words could ever do
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care, I do
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care, I do
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart, of my heart,
of my heart
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care, I do
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart, of my heart,
baby of my heart
"I Just Called To Say I Love You"
No New Year's Day to celebrate
No chocolate covered candy hearts to give away
No first of spring
No song to sing
In fact here's just another ordinary day
No April rain
No flowers bloom
No wedding Saturday within the month of June
But what it is, is something true
Made up of these three words that I must say to you
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart
No summer's high
No warm July
No harvest moon to light one tender August night
No autumn breeze
No falling leaves
Not even time for birds to fly to southern skies
No Libra sun
No Halloween
No giving thanks to all the Christmas joy you bring
But what it is, though old so new
To fill your heart like no three words could ever do
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care, I do
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care, I do
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart, of my heart,
of my heart
I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care, I do
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart, of my heart,
baby of my heart
Maybe this should go in Poetry Corner but I wrote a song when Mrs Kiss was diagnosed with breast cancer. If anyone want to hear it send me a PM and I'll send you a link to a website where you can listen to it.
Here are the lyrics.
Tender
I sit and waitfor you to take your time,
But I don't mind 'coz it's you,
That I came for, a long time ago.
You went into our room and sat upon our bed,
You smiled and placed your hands so tight against your head,
I know, that you know.
Tender words can't say,
What I'm dreading to hear,
From you.... no no.
Life's too short for this,
You're too good for His world,
His World.
For this world.. yeah.
You're too good, you're to good for this world.
Well I sit and wait for the end of my days,
Wondering why I wasn't taken this way,
Well that's too bad.
Well I'm young and you learn these things when you're old,
They can't understand, they don't know,
That's the way it goes.
Tender words can't say,
What I'm trying to say,
I feel it deep in me,
You can warm my soul,
You can heal my heart... yeah.
(repeat chorus to fade out.)
Here are the lyrics.
Tender
I sit and waitfor you to take your time,
But I don't mind 'coz it's you,
That I came for, a long time ago.
You went into our room and sat upon our bed,
You smiled and placed your hands so tight against your head,
I know, that you know.
Tender words can't say,
What I'm dreading to hear,
From you.... no no.
Life's too short for this,
You're too good for His world,
His World.
For this world.. yeah.
You're too good, you're to good for this world.
Well I sit and wait for the end of my days,
Wondering why I wasn't taken this way,
Well that's too bad.
Well I'm young and you learn these things when you're old,
They can't understand, they don't know,
That's the way it goes.
Tender words can't say,
What I'm trying to say,
I feel it deep in me,
You can warm my soul,
You can heal my heart... yeah.
(repeat chorus to fade out.)
Sex God
Quote by PoloLady
Walking in a Winter Wonderland
Lacy things -- the wife is missin',
Didn't ask -- her permission,
I'm wearin' her clothes,
Her silk pantyhose,
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear.
In the store -- there's a teddy,
Little straps -- like spaghetti,
It holds me so tight,
Like handcuffs at night,
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear.
In the office there's a guy named Melvin,
He pretends that I am Murphy Brown.
He'll say, "Are you ready?" I'll say,"Whoa, Man!"
"Let's wait until our wives are out of town!"
Later on, if you wanna,
We can dress -- like Madonna,
Put on some eyeshade,
And join the parade,
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear!
Lacy things... missin',
Didn't ask... permission,
Wearin' her clothes,
Her silk pantyhose,
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear.
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear,
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear!
Bob Rivers. I love it :giggle:
Marilyn Manson - Tainted Love
Sometimes I feel I've got to
Run away I've got to
Get away
From the pain that you drive into the heart of me
The love we share
Seems to go nowhere
And I've lost my light
For I toss and turn I can't sleep at night
(chorus)
Once I ran to you (I ran)
Now I'll run from you
This tainted love you've given
I give you all a boy could give you
Take my tears and that's not nearly all
Oh...tainted love
Tainted love
Now I know I've got to
Run away I've got to
Get away
You don't really want IT any more from me
To make things right
You need someone to hold you tight
And you'LL think love is to pray
But I'm sorry I don't pray that way
(chorus...)
Don't touch me please
I cannot stand the way you tease
I love you though you hurt me so
Now I'm going to pack my things and go
Tainted love, tainted love (x2)
Touch me baby, tainted love (x2)
Tainted love (x3)
quickly followed by.....
Queens Of The Stone Age - Mexicola
Setting sun deals hands of gold
There's velvet eyes in Mexico
Just a fall away
And all she said was true
Speak in tongues, speak in lies
Drooling livers, born to die
It's a wonder that those guns don't point at you
Keep sayin, go on, keep sayin, go on, keep sayin, you will live forever
Point and shoot, I know just what you mean
In a world that's full of shit and gasoline, baby
One dog's dead one's on the phone
Just leave a lung or leave it alone
It's that same on song again
I hate it cause it's true
Phew...
Thankyouverymuch. ;)
*easy has left the building*
Sex God
Talking of Rolf Harris classics..... :giggle:
All together now...
Rolf Harris - Stairway To Heaven
There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she's buying the stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying the stairway to heaven.
*shakes wobble board*
There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.
There's a feeling I get when I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who stand looking.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.
And it's whispered that soon if we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter.
If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now,
It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder.
Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow, and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind.
And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold.
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.
And she's buying the stairway to heaven.
All together now...
Rolf Harris - Stairway To Heaven
There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she's buying the stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying the stairway to heaven.
*shakes wobble board*
There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.
There's a feeling I get when I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who stand looking.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.
And it's whispered that soon if we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter.
If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now,
It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder.
Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow, and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind.
And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold.
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.
And she's buying the stairway to heaven.
Sex God
Just for breakfast this week
Artist - Paul Young
Album - Various Songs
Lyrics - Toast
Morning all. I'd like to tell you about when I was a young boy. I must have been three or four months old at the time. I didn't really know what I wanted, and if I did, I wouldn't have been able to tell anybody, 'cos all I could do was gurgle. So I sat there in me highchair, thinking one day, looking at me tray and thinking what I'd give for a meal on there. So I started looking round to see what I could have. I was rubbing me eggy soldier in me head, trying to think, and then I looked in the corner and there's a little breadbin with its mouth open, just staring at me, like. And then I looked in and I saw bread.
I thought, oh yeah, I'll have toast,
A little piece of toast.
Well, then I started getting older,
I hated this, I hated that,
Expensive state was ludicrous
And cafés couldn't cater for the finer things in life:
The upper crust was not for me,
I could tell that.
So I'd go back home,
Switch the kitchen light on,
Put the grill on,
Slip a slice under
And have toast,
A little piece of toast.
'Cos there's so much to choose from.
There's brown bread, white bread,
All sorts of wholemeal bread;
It comes in funny packages
With writing on the side,
But it doesn't matter which one you have
'Cos when you cut the crusts off,
Have it with marmalade
Or butter, cheese, tomatoes, beans,
Banana
Or chocolate if you're strange,
It doesn't really matter.
Oh no, it all goes with toast,
Just toast.
I'm gonna think about it some...
That's toast, mmm yeah,
Just toast,
That's toast,
Just toast.
Well I go down the supermarket
With me basket in me hand,
I'm walking from one counter to another
Trying to find the bread stall,
But I can't find it anywhere
And then I bump into a mother
With a baby in a basket
And she says
'Oh look, you've started him off again,
I come down here for a little bit of peace and quiet
To get some bread to go home to make toast,
Just toast,
I like toast'
Yeah, but I don't half like toast.
OK, scrape that toast, boys.
That's toast,
Yeah, just toast.
I can't think about it any more. I've got to go and have some, it's no good. Here listen, I'm getting a bit browned off standing here. Me too. Shall we go and have some toast? Good idea. Why not? OK. I've got the grill on. Got any brown bread? Yeah! Have you got wholemeal bread? Wheatmeal bread? All sorts of toast. Let's go... (They proceed to make toast, accompanied by various kitchen noises.)
So who is making toast today?? :lol:
Artist - Paul Young
Album - Various Songs
Lyrics - Toast
Morning all. I'd like to tell you about when I was a young boy. I must have been three or four months old at the time. I didn't really know what I wanted, and if I did, I wouldn't have been able to tell anybody, 'cos all I could do was gurgle. So I sat there in me highchair, thinking one day, looking at me tray and thinking what I'd give for a meal on there. So I started looking round to see what I could have. I was rubbing me eggy soldier in me head, trying to think, and then I looked in the corner and there's a little breadbin with its mouth open, just staring at me, like. And then I looked in and I saw bread.
I thought, oh yeah, I'll have toast,
A little piece of toast.
Well, then I started getting older,
I hated this, I hated that,
Expensive state was ludicrous
And cafés couldn't cater for the finer things in life:
The upper crust was not for me,
I could tell that.
So I'd go back home,
Switch the kitchen light on,
Put the grill on,
Slip a slice under
And have toast,
A little piece of toast.
'Cos there's so much to choose from.
There's brown bread, white bread,
All sorts of wholemeal bread;
It comes in funny packages
With writing on the side,
But it doesn't matter which one you have
'Cos when you cut the crusts off,
Have it with marmalade
Or butter, cheese, tomatoes, beans,
Banana
Or chocolate if you're strange,
It doesn't really matter.
Oh no, it all goes with toast,
Just toast.
I'm gonna think about it some...
That's toast, mmm yeah,
Just toast,
That's toast,
Just toast.
Well I go down the supermarket
With me basket in me hand,
I'm walking from one counter to another
Trying to find the bread stall,
But I can't find it anywhere
And then I bump into a mother
With a baby in a basket
And she says
'Oh look, you've started him off again,
I come down here for a little bit of peace and quiet
To get some bread to go home to make toast,
Just toast,
I like toast'
Yeah, but I don't half like toast.
OK, scrape that toast, boys.
That's toast,
Yeah, just toast.
I can't think about it any more. I've got to go and have some, it's no good. Here listen, I'm getting a bit browned off standing here. Me too. Shall we go and have some toast? Good idea. Why not? OK. I've got the grill on. Got any brown bread? Yeah! Have you got wholemeal bread? Wheatmeal bread? All sorts of toast. Let's go... (They proceed to make toast, accompanied by various kitchen noises.)
So who is making toast today?? :lol:
:wanker: 
:hump: 
Quote by louise_and_joe
And what are you doing in here stranger, lowering the tone again:giggle:
Louise xx
Nice to see you
Err - taking a rest
Also I'm going to a munch tonight and just realised that I haven't been on SH for ages (life is still keeping me too busy :-( ).Quote by Hungrypussy69
Come back to bed and get on with it then!! :grin:
I said I was having a REST!
Quote by Hungrypussy69
Come back to bed and get on with it then!! :grin:
I said I was having a REST!
Ok-you sit and have your rest......
Hungrypussy peruses the munch list to see how many single males are going to the munch tonight! :twisted: :twisted:
36 puts on his dressing gown, slippers and fishnets (:shock
. Lights up his pipe (:shock:) and puts up his feet.Mmmmm. Peace.
Police Truck
Tonight's the night that we got the truck
We're goin' downtown gonna beat up drunks
Your turn to drive I'll bring the beer
It's the late, late shift no one to fear
And ride, ride how we ride
We ride, lowride
It's roundup time where the good whores meet
Gonna drag one screaming off the street
And ride, ride how we ride
Got a black uniform and a silver badge
Playin' cops for real/playin' cops for pay
Let's ride, lowride
Pull down your dress here's a kick in the ass
Let's beat you blue 'til you shit in your pants
Don't move, child got a big black stick
There's six of us babe, so suck on my dick
And ride, ride how we ride
Let's ride, lowride
The left newspapers might whine a bit
But the guys at the station they don't give a shit
Dispatch calls "Are you doin' something wicked?"
"No siree, Jack, we're just givin' tickets"
As we ride, ride, how we ride
Let's ride, lowride
Tonight's the night that we got the truck
We're goin' downtown gonna beat up drunks
Your turn to drive I'll bring the beer
It's the late, late shift no one to fear
And ride, ride how we ride
We ride, lowride
It's roundup time where the good whores meet
Gonna drag one screaming off the street
And ride, ride how we ride
Got a black uniform and a silver badge
Playin' cops for real/playin' cops for pay
Let's ride, lowride
Pull down your dress here's a kick in the ass
Let's beat you blue 'til you shit in your pants
Don't move, child got a big black stick
There's six of us babe, so suck on my dick
And ride, ride how we ride
Let's ride, lowride
The left newspapers might whine a bit
But the guys at the station they don't give a shit
Dispatch calls "Are you doin' something wicked?"
"No siree, Jack, we're just givin' tickets"
As we ride, ride, how we ride
Let's ride, lowride
Following on with the DK theme...
Went to a party
I danced all night
I drank 16 beers
And I started up a fight
But now I am jaded
You're out of luck
I'm rolling down the stairs
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk, to fuck
I'm too drunk, too drunk, too drunk
To fuck
I like your stories
I love your gun
Shooting out truck tires
Sounds like loads and loads of fun
But in my room
Wish you were dead
You ball like the baby
In Eraserhead
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk, to fuck
It's all I need right now
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk, to fuck
I'm sick soft gooey and cold
Too drunk to fuck
I'm about to drop
My head's a mess
The only salvation is
I'll never see you again
You give me head
It makes it worse
Take out your fuckin' retainer
Put it in your purse
I'm too drunk to fuck
You're to drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
It's all I need right now Oh baby
I'm melting like an ice cream bar
Oh baby
And now I got diarrhea
Too drunk to fuck
Went to a party
I danced all night
I drank 16 beers
And I started up a fight
But now I am jaded
You're out of luck
I'm rolling down the stairs
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk, to fuck
I'm too drunk, too drunk, too drunk
To fuck
I like your stories
I love your gun
Shooting out truck tires
Sounds like loads and loads of fun
But in my room
Wish you were dead
You ball like the baby
In Eraserhead
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk, to fuck
It's all I need right now
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk, to fuck
I'm sick soft gooey and cold
Too drunk to fuck
I'm about to drop
My head's a mess
The only salvation is
I'll never see you again
You give me head
It makes it worse
Take out your fuckin' retainer
Put it in your purse
I'm too drunk to fuck
You're to drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
It's all I need right now Oh baby
I'm melting like an ice cream bar
Oh baby
And now I got diarrhea
Too drunk to fuck
Orgasminator
Billy Joel - Innocent Man
Some people stay far away from the door
If there's a chance of it opening up
They hear a voice in the hall outside
And hope that it just passes by
Some people live with the fear of a touch
And the anger of having been a fool
They will not listen to anyone
So nobody tells them a lie
I know you're only protecting yourself
I know you're thinking of somebody else
Someone who hurt you
But I'm not above
Making up for the love
You've been denying you could ever feel
I'm not above doing anything
To restore your faith if I can
Some people see through the eyes of the old
Before they ever get a look at the young
I'm only willing to hear you cry
Because I am an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
Some people say they will never believe
Another promise they hear in the dark
Because they only remember too well
They heard somebody tell them before
Some people sleep all alone every night
Instead of taking a lover to bed
Some people find that it's easier to hate
Than to wait anymore
I know you don't want to hear what I say
I know you're gonna keep turning away
But I've been there and if I can survive
I can keep you alive
I'm not above going through it again
I'm not above being cool for a while
If you're cruel to me I'll understand
Some people run from a possible fight
Some people figure they can never win
And although this is a fight I can lose
The accused is an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man
You know you only hurt yourself out of spite
I guess you'd rather be a martyr tonight
That's your decision
But I'm not below
Anybody I know
If there's a chance of resurrecting a love
I'm not above going back to the start
To find out where the heartache began
Some people hope for a miracle cure
Some people just accept the world as it is
But I'm not willing to lay down and die
Because I am an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man
Especially the verse:
Some people sleep all alone every night
Instead of taking a lover to bed
Some people find that it's easier to hate
Than to wait anymore
And, of course, the chorus, as it refers to me:
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man
Stuart
Some people stay far away from the door
If there's a chance of it opening up
They hear a voice in the hall outside
And hope that it just passes by
Some people live with the fear of a touch
And the anger of having been a fool
They will not listen to anyone
So nobody tells them a lie
I know you're only protecting yourself
I know you're thinking of somebody else
Someone who hurt you
But I'm not above
Making up for the love
You've been denying you could ever feel
I'm not above doing anything
To restore your faith if I can
Some people see through the eyes of the old
Before they ever get a look at the young
I'm only willing to hear you cry
Because I am an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
Some people say they will never believe
Another promise they hear in the dark
Because they only remember too well
They heard somebody tell them before
Some people sleep all alone every night
Instead of taking a lover to bed
Some people find that it's easier to hate
Than to wait anymore
I know you don't want to hear what I say
I know you're gonna keep turning away
But I've been there and if I can survive
I can keep you alive
I'm not above going through it again
I'm not above being cool for a while
If you're cruel to me I'll understand
Some people run from a possible fight
Some people figure they can never win
And although this is a fight I can lose
The accused is an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man
You know you only hurt yourself out of spite
I guess you'd rather be a martyr tonight
That's your decision
But I'm not below
Anybody I know
If there's a chance of resurrecting a love
I'm not above going back to the start
To find out where the heartache began
Some people hope for a miracle cure
Some people just accept the world as it is
But I'm not willing to lay down and die
Because I am an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man
Especially the verse:
Some people sleep all alone every night
Instead of taking a lover to bed
Some people find that it's easier to hate
Than to wait anymore
And, of course, the chorus, as it refers to me:
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man
Stuart
Sex God
Stuart
I can think of other things you sing so well at munches
:P
I can think of other things you sing so well at munches
:P
Orgasminator
Quote by Sarah
Stuart
I can think of other things you sing so well at munches
:P
Stuart
God save the Queen
she ain't no human being.
There is no future
in England's dreaming
Don't be told what you want
Don't be told what you need.
There's no future
there's no future
there's no future for you
God save the Queen
we mean it man
we love our queen
God saves
God save the Queen
'cos tourists are money
and our figurehead
is not what she seems
Oh God save history
God save your mad parade
Oh Lord God have mercy
all crimes are paid.
When there's no future
how can there be sin
we're the flowers
in the dustbin
we're the poison
in your human machine
we're the future
you're future
God save the Queen
we mean it man
we love our queen
God saves
God save the Queen
we mean it man
there is no future
in England's dreaming
No future
no future
no future for me
she ain't no human being.
There is no future
in England's dreaming
Don't be told what you want
Don't be told what you need.
There's no future
there's no future
there's no future for you
God save the Queen
we mean it man
we love our queen
God saves
God save the Queen
'cos tourists are money
and our figurehead
is not what she seems
Oh God save history
God save your mad parade
Oh Lord God have mercy
all crimes are paid.
When there's no future
how can there be sin
we're the flowers
in the dustbin
we're the poison
in your human machine
we're the future
you're future
God save the Queen
we mean it man
we love our queen
God saves
God save the Queen
we mean it man
there is no future
in England's dreaming
No future
no future
no future for me
:karaoke: This town, is coming like a ghost town
All the clubs have been closed down
This place, is coming like a ghost town
Bands won't play no more
Too much fighting on the dance floor
Do you remember the good old days before the ghost town
We danced and sang, and the music played inna de boomtown
This town, is coming like a ghost town
Why must the youth fight against themselves
Government leaving the youth on the shelf
This place, is coming like a ghost town
No job to be found in this country
Can't go on no more
The people getting angry
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
:karaoke:
All the clubs have been closed down
This place, is coming like a ghost town
Bands won't play no more
Too much fighting on the dance floor
Do you remember the good old days before the ghost town
We danced and sang, and the music played inna de boomtown
This town, is coming like a ghost town
Why must the youth fight against themselves
Government leaving the youth on the shelf
This place, is coming like a ghost town
No job to be found in this country
Can't go on no more
The people getting angry
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
This town, is coming like a ghost town
:karaoke:
American Pie - The Day the Software Died
A short, short time ago, I can still remember
How my laptop used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had a mouse, I could point, click, surf, and browse,
And make my boss happy for awhile.
But Y2K made me shiver as my hard drive starts to quiver.
With data that is screwed up, systems that won't boot up.
Well, I don't remember if I cried when I learned my CDs were fried,
And something dissed my floppy drive the day the software died.
Chorus:
And I was singing,
By, by, all America cries. We've been erased and we don't know why.
Those good ol' boys were using DVD drives,
And sayin', "This'll be the day that I die. This'll be the day that I die."
Did you write this book of codes, and do you have faith that they will load,
Internet Explore installed.
Do you believe you'll find a gate accessing 21rst century dates?
And can you teach me how to write COBOL?
Well, I know that you've been sending flames. You hate to go back to mainframes.
You trashed all your RAM. Man, I dig that crazy spam.
I'm a lonely, middle age Ph.D. with a real IBM PC
That won't backspace or delete the day the software dies.
Chorus
Now for ten years we've been downsized, sold, merged, and trivialized,
And now we haven't got a prayer.
Coders think they're queens and kings demanding all sorts of things
That before you know they wouldn't dare.
And with the networks shutting down, and MacIntosh icons that frown.
Offensinve DOS commands; they don't understand.
And while a newbie reads a COBOL book and says he's got us off the hook,
He doesn't yet know where to look, the day the software dies.
I met a guy from Microsoft, and I asked him how much he had lost,
But he just scowled and turned away.
So I went down to the software store where I'd bought Windows years before,
But the man there said that Netscape, it wouldn't play.
And in cubicles, the users screamed, accountants cried, and coders schemed.
But no servers awoke. The modems all were broke.
And the three men I admire most: Bill Gates, Dave Packard, and Steve Jobs-
They caught the last plane for the coast, the day the software died.
And they were singing,
Byte, byte, why are we on this flight.
It's never gonna land 'cause controllers can't sight.
We should have seen this coming, now it's payback time.
And this'll be the day that we die. This'll be the day that we die.
Repeat first Chorus:
A short, short time ago, I can still remember
How my laptop used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had a mouse, I could point, click, surf, and browse,
And make my boss happy for awhile.
But Y2K made me shiver as my hard drive starts to quiver.
With data that is screwed up, systems that won't boot up.
Well, I don't remember if I cried when I learned my CDs were fried,
And something dissed my floppy drive the day the software died.
Chorus:
And I was singing,
By, by, all America cries. We've been erased and we don't know why.
Those good ol' boys were using DVD drives,
And sayin', "This'll be the day that I die. This'll be the day that I die."
Did you write this book of codes, and do you have faith that they will load,
Internet Explore installed.
Do you believe you'll find a gate accessing 21rst century dates?
And can you teach me how to write COBOL?
Well, I know that you've been sending flames. You hate to go back to mainframes.
You trashed all your RAM. Man, I dig that crazy spam.
I'm a lonely, middle age Ph.D. with a real IBM PC
That won't backspace or delete the day the software dies.
Chorus
Now for ten years we've been downsized, sold, merged, and trivialized,
And now we haven't got a prayer.
Coders think they're queens and kings demanding all sorts of things
That before you know they wouldn't dare.
And with the networks shutting down, and MacIntosh icons that frown.
Offensinve DOS commands; they don't understand.
And while a newbie reads a COBOL book and says he's got us off the hook,
He doesn't yet know where to look, the day the software dies.
I met a guy from Microsoft, and I asked him how much he had lost,
But he just scowled and turned away.
So I went down to the software store where I'd bought Windows years before,
But the man there said that Netscape, it wouldn't play.
And in cubicles, the users screamed, accountants cried, and coders schemed.
But no servers awoke. The modems all were broke.
And the three men I admire most: Bill Gates, Dave Packard, and Steve Jobs-
They caught the last plane for the coast, the day the software died.
And they were singing,
Byte, byte, why are we on this flight.
It's never gonna land 'cause controllers can't sight.
We should have seen this coming, now it's payback time.
And this'll be the day that we die. This'll be the day that we die.
Repeat first Chorus:
