have you done things you cannot tell your children about?

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
(apart from swinging (i dont think kids or even young adults can really understand something so unconventional as a whole (ofcourse some can)) (doesnt mean its wrong its just conditioning).)
i have and when asked by my kids what i did in the army and in a particular war i fought in i lie. my kids think that i was a hand to hand combat instructor and spent 4 years in a training camp.
no jokes about "my father was a shoe salesman in berlin during the war" please.

So now you were in the Army...Fuck me Bruce you really are full of shit! lol

29 Oct 2009

Thankfully I don't have kids! lol

29 Oct 2009

i dont have children, but looking back i dont think there is anything i have done i couldnt tell them at some stage in their lives

29 Oct 2009

have I done stuff i wouldn't tell my son (when he was a child)? Damn right I have. I'd be very concerned if I hadn't.
From shop-lifting (bear with me here) - it was a bag of crisps and I was so terrified I dropped them in the nearest bin and ran for it.
To making the most of my 'social opportunities' at Uni - inlcuding the odd whiff of weed.
Can you imagine living a life that is clean enough to be shown on Play School?
Now he's an adult, he may here about more. But it's my life, not a public document. So he may well never hear about a fair bit of my life.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by Kaznkev
have I done stuff i wouldn't tell my son (when he was a child)? Damn right I have. I'd be very concerned if I hadn't.
From shop-lifting (bear with me here) - it was a bag of crisps and I was so terrified I dropped them in the nearest bin and ran for it.
To making the most of my 'social opportunities' at Uni - inlcuding the odd whiff of weed.
Can you imagine living a life that is clean enough to be shown on Play School?
Now he's an adult, he may here about more. But it's my life, not a public document. So he may well never hear about a fair bit of my life.

:thumbup: but is not some degree of honesty not important so they dont think you are a no nothing old fart?
Oh yes, of course. The odd knowing comment during Night Cops or the odd fruity joke. Just to keep him on his toes biggrin

Oh and the lecture after he did (and was caught on camera) his own bit of shop-lifting (In HMV FFS - how thick is that?) ommitted any mention of crisps :D:D:D:D:D:D

29 Oct 2009

So you have...now tell me did you say it for effect aswell,just like you film degree,paying for sex etc etc etc?

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
i am clear with my kids. you want drugs, come to daddy not some cunting dealer.
sex, thats your problem...

:shock: :shock:

29 Oct 2009

Modesty is such a turn on, don't you find?
Seriously - Stephen Fry is an incredibly talented man, but he is also a totally lovely man. Ok he'll take a slice of you for mixing your metaphors, but he has never seemed to feel the need to flaunt his many, excellent, achievements. Or, worse still, to drop heavy hints about just how marvelous they are.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by foxylady2209
Modesty is such a turn on, don't you find?
Seriously - Stephen Fry is an incredibly talented man, but he is also a totally lovely man. Ok he'll take a slice of you for mixing your metaphors, but he has never seemed to feel the need to flaunt his many, excellent, achievements. Or, worse still, to drop heavy hints about just how marvelous they are.

Odd, isn't it- but it kinda makes him weirdly sexy too.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by kentswingers777
i am clear with my kids. you want drugs, come to daddy not some cunting dealer.
sex, thats your problem...

:shock: :shock:
I'll second that
:shock: :shock:

29 Oct 2009

Quote by Witchy
Modesty is such a turn on, don't you find?
Seriously - Stephen Fry is an incredibly talented man, but he is also a totally lovely man. Ok he'll take a slice of you for mixing your metaphors, but he has never seemed to feel the need to flaunt his many, excellent, achievements. Or, worse still, to drop heavy hints about just how marvelous they are.

Odd, isn't it- but it kinda makes him weirdly sexy too.
Nah dont see that nope no never ever no way! biggrin

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
i am clear with my kids. you want drugs, come to daddy not some cunting dealer.
sex, thats your problem...

Oh its OK i guess that daddy has to go to the dealers then? Please just don't answer that
You on a mission Brucie?
biggrin

29 Oct 2009

Just to reassure you that this hasn't been entirely overlooked.
wink

Quote by Dlep
i am clear with my kids. you want drugs, come to daddy not some cunting dealer.
sex, thats your problem...

:shock: :shock:
I'll second that
:shock: :shock:

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
Modesty is such a turn on, don't you find?
Seriously - Stephen Fry is an incredibly talented man, but he is also a totally lovely man. Ok he'll take a slice of you for mixing your metaphors, but he has never seemed to feel the need to flaunt his many, excellent, achievements. Or, worse still, to drop heavy hints about just how marvelous they are.

stephen fry is an incredibly neurotic man. hes just a very good actor.
I don't see how being neurotic (although I only know that he is bipolar (is that the correct term for manic/depressive nowadays?)) means he is not a really nice guy.
I've seen him be generously amused at really stupid comments from people with a lot less wit than him. That leads me to say he is a really nice guy. It's how we behave that defines us - not the thoughts we keep inside when faced with someone challenging.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
Modesty is such a turn on, don't you find?
Seriously - Stephen Fry is an incredibly talented man, but he is also a totally lovely man. Ok he'll take a slice of you for mixing your metaphors, but he has never seemed to feel the need to flaunt his many, excellent, achievements. Or, worse still, to drop heavy hints about just how marvelous they are.

stephen fry is an incredibly neurotic man. hes just a very good actor.
Stephen Fry has a serious mental illness. In spite of this, he is also a very good actor, presenter, writer, academic- and incredibly witty, modest, charming individual.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
i wouldnt swop with fry.

We would.

Apologies for speaking on behalf of everyone. ;)

29 Oct 2009

Quote by Ms_Whips
mr powers, i cant help it if ive done a few things in my life. your reaction suggests you feel threatened by achievers? im worried my cv would send you in to fits of rage...

remind me again, what is it they say about jack?
whips
Miss miss miss me please can I say please can I....
they say.......he can eat no fat! :d

29 Oct 2009

If I even *mention* jacks beanstalk, you guys are gonna have a feild day lol

oh and stephen fry is a complete hero. A truly free thinker and a good one at that.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
"remind me again, what is it they say about jack? "
do you live your life by cliches? im guessing you mean master of none?
i dont believe you need to spend your whole life doing something to master it.
i was in the army for 4 years. 1 would have been enough to get the point
i have a bachelors degree
a post grad diploma
professional qualification
an mba
i worked in restaurants, drove a delivery van and did wedding photography during my studies
i was a partner in a top city law firm. after a few years of that and daily homicidal thoughts i figured time for a new challenge.
i went in house with a client. was offered a directorship so went off and started up a new venture of my own.
ive done other things like raised kids, learnt to play the guitar, won pub quizes, shagged a lot. and more.
and none of those things were done in half measures.

Congratulations.
The general point was that it isn't necessary to vaunt one's own acheivements. Not that we thought you don't have enough of them. In fact, it (going on about them) is rather unattractive to many.

29 Oct 2009

And.......your a multi millionaire with a 14 inch cock? lol

:lol:

29 Oct 2009

Quote by kentswingers777
And.......your a multi millionaire with a 14 inch cock? :lol:

That'll mean he's Bernard Mathews ...I sense fowl play :lol:

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
"remind me again, what is it they say about jack? "
do you live your life by cliches? im guessing you mean master of none?
i dont believe you need to spend your whole life doing something to master it.
i was in the army for 4 years. 1 would have been enough to get the point
i have a bachelors degree
a post grad diploma
professional qualification
an mba
i worked in restaurants, drove a delivery van and did wedding photography during my studies
i was a partner in a top city law firm. after a few years of that and daily homicidal thoughts i figured time for a new challenge.
i went in house with a client. was offered a directorship so went off and started up a new venture of my own.
ive done other things like raised kids, learnt to play the guitar, won pub quizes, shagged a lot. and more.
and none of those things were done in half measures.

Did any of those things teach you how to get on with people? Genuine question.

29 Oct 2009

Quote by Dlep
And.......your a multi millionaire with a 14 inch cock? :lol:

That'll mean he's Bernard Mathews ...I sense fowl play :lol:
Ewwwwww yuk. Did you HAVE to pu that image in my head? BM leaning over all sweaty and jowly muttering "bootiful, just bootiful" :vomiticon:

29 Oct 2009

Quote by foxylady2209
And.......your a multi millionaire with a 14 inch cock? :lol:

That'll mean he's Bernard Mathews ...I sense fowl play :lol:
Ewwwwww yuk. Did you HAVE to pu that image in my head? BM leaning over all sweaty and jowly muttering "bootiful, just bootiful" :vomiticon:
:shock:
I was refering to the average size of a chicken.... nowt else.
Seriously :shock:
Now I have that image in my mind! :shock:

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
"remind me again, what is it they say about jack? "
do you live your life by cliches? im guessing you mean master of none?
i dont believe you need to spend your whole life doing something to master it.
i was in the army for 4 years. 1 would have been enough to get the point
i have a bachelors degree
a post grad diploma
professional qualification
an mba
i worked in restaurants, drove a delivery van and did wedding photography during my studies
i was a partner in a top city law firm. after a few years of that and daily homicidal thoughts i figured time for a new challenge.
i went in house with a client. was offered a directorship so went off and started up a new venture of my own.
ive done other things like raised kids, learnt to play the guitar, won pub quizes, shagged a lot. and more.
and none of those things were done in half measures.

Did any of those things teach you how to get on with people? Genuine question.
no, that seems to have always come naturally to me.
Ever heard of NPD, Brucie?

29 Oct 2009

Not another " disorder ". :shock:

29 Oct 2009

Ah Cherry you are a wise and all seeing soul.
To bring things back on tarck:
I dont bore my kids shitless with tales of my life, I am happy to discuss my activities, past present or future if they are relevant to our conversation.

29 Oct 2009

I was having dinner with Bo Diddley january last year in our home town, a late birthday celebration. I turned to him and said "Elas (He was always Elas to me from our days catching crawfish for the gumbo down the bayou) you really did change the face of music". Ben you are such a brown nose he replied.
Small world isnt it.
(DO i get to wear an NPD lapel badge now)

29 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
just so that you know. for every gimp who gets riled by brucie on here there 2 who pm me and say what a great job im doing and how much theyre enjoying it.

Hey you can add this job to your CV then Brucie...... rotflmao

30 Oct 2009

Quote by brucie
i am clear with my kids. you want drugs, come to daddy not some cunting dealer.
sex, thats your problem...

Blimey.... :shock:
They do say there is no such thing as bad kids...just bad parents.................. surprised