I fancy my female lodger for sex , but she is in a relationship.
She has gone away with her BF for a week and returns on sunday, so whats my next move ?
Thanks guys, Kirk
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I fancy my female lodger for sex and need some advice ?
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Sex God
Your next move is to find someone else.
Your lodger is not there for your sexual satisfaction; she's there because she needs somewhere to stay. She doesn't need the extra uncertainty of wondering if she can trust you, or whether she needs to lock her door at night.
If she was someone you met once somewhere, in public, then it would be different. You could ask, and if she says no then that's the end of it. Here, you already have a different relationship, based on trust, and she spends a lot of time alone in your presence. We all need to feel safe. Show some respect and don't take that away from her.
And don't go through her things. That's ultra creepy.
Your lodger is not there for your sexual satisfaction; she's there because she needs somewhere to stay. She doesn't need the extra uncertainty of wondering if she can trust you, or whether she needs to lock her door at night.
If she was someone you met once somewhere, in public, then it would be different. You could ask, and if she says no then that's the end of it. Here, you already have a different relationship, based on trust, and she spends a lot of time alone in your presence. We all need to feel safe. Show some respect and don't take that away from her.
And don't go through her things. That's ultra creepy.
Jeepers, if you were a landlord of mine I'd soon be off. You sound alomst stalkerish, sorry but there is no other way to put it, in her room without her consent, rifling through her laundry basket and almost exposing yourself to her also?
Take some advice, remove the temptation and sort yourself out with a male lodger.
*steps neatly away*
Take some advice, remove the temptation and sort yourself out with a male lodger.
*steps neatly away*
Agreed with the above, she is off limits and you should consider her so. Her space is her safe place and if you cannot respect that then you should consider asking her to leave at earliest opportunity.
Even if she were to make the first move, you should think seriously about the consequences of your actions, especially if she remains in a relationship.
If you cannot get her out of your head then have a wank, or better yet, get off your arse and out down the local meat market for a quick roll in the hay.
A classic way to tell if you really are infatuated with someone - have sex with 25 other women (not necessarily all at once) and if you are still infatuated with her then go for it.
Even if she were to make the first move, you should think seriously about the consequences of your actions, especially if she remains in a relationship.
If you cannot get her out of your head then have a wank, or better yet, get off your arse and out down the local meat market for a quick roll in the hay.
A classic way to tell if you really are infatuated with someone - have sex with 25 other women (not necessarily all at once) and if you are still infatuated with her then go for it.
OK if you must make a move on your lodger then your next move is to give her notice to leave, tell her the truth, that your feelings for her mean that you cannot remain living under the same roof and hope that by living apart you will both have an opportunity to develop and increase the feelings you have for each other.
Because as a landlord who shares the same house you have a moral duty to protect your tenants and ensure that they are safe from unwanted attentions by anyone especially yourself.
Anything less than that is creepy, wrong, deceitful and as has been said stalkerish. Any actions you do that have an ulterior motive such as seduction or done in the hope that it will make her develop feelings for you is wrong and you will do things in that context subconsciously or deliberately, a friend would never do anything that would put their friends or associates relationships at risk.
Because as a landlord who shares the same house you have a moral duty to protect your tenants and ensure that they are safe from unwanted attentions by anyone especially yourself.
Anything less than that is creepy, wrong, deceitful and as has been said stalkerish. Any actions you do that have an ulterior motive such as seduction or done in the hope that it will make her develop feelings for you is wrong and you will do things in that context subconsciously or deliberately, a friend would never do anything that would put their friends or associates relationships at risk.
Mod
As the original poster has amended his original post, those who didn't see it will not be answering his original query, although from the comments made already, I think you may get an idea of what he posted - therefore this post is locked.
Any questions why, please feel free to PM.
Mal
Any questions why, please feel free to PM.
Mal