There's a wholle load of people left/leaving or taking a break from the site recently - It's awful to see them go nd while we may support them sometimes we have to let them go and have some time to re-evauate things and decide what's right for them.
Reading the forums over the last few days has made me feel down, seems not as many laughs and fun going on here and some of the community spirit has gone - which is what I like about this place.
I presume some of u are feeling the same way too so how about a joke competiton or something - any ideas for cheering ourselves up a little
What do u all think?
OK - My Entry -
What's Brown and Sticky?
lhk
I go away for a few days and come back to all this! To everyone who has left I send my warm wishes to everyone who's staying I send this joke xx
A man entered his favourite restaurant and sat at his regular table. After looking around, he noticed a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby, all alone. He motioned the waiter over and asked him to send their most expensive bottle of merlot over to the woman, knowing that if she accepted the bottle, she would be his.
The waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, "This is from the gentleman seated over there," indicating the sender. She regarded the wine coolly for a second, not looking at the man, and decided to send a reply note to the man. The waiter, who was lingering for a response took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.
The note read:"For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million pounds in the bank, and 7 inches in your pants." After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return. He folded the note, handed it to the waiter and instructed him to return to the woman.
it read: "For your information, I have a Ferrari Maranello, a BMW Z8, a Mercedes CL600 and a Porsche Turbo in my garage. There is over twenty million pounds in my bank account. But not even for a woman as beautiful as you would I cut three inches off. Just send the bottle back."
An old gent moved into a retirement community where good-looking, eligible men are at a premium. After he had been there for a week he went to confession and said, "Bless me father, for I have sinned. Last week I had my way with seven different women. "The priest said, "Take seven lemons, squeeze them into a glass and drink the juice without pausing. "Will that cleanse me of my sins, Father?", "No," replied the priest, "but it'll wipe that grinoff your face.".
There once was a lady who was tired of living alone. So she put an ad in the paper which outlined her requirements. She wanted a man who 1) would treat her nicely, 2) wouldn't run away from her, and 3) would be good in bed. Then, one day, she heard the doorbell ring. She answered it, and there on the front porch was a man in a wheel chair who didn't have any arms or legs. "I'm here about the ad you put in the paper. As you can see, I have no arms so I can't beat you, and I have no legs so I can't run away from you." "Yes, but are you good in bed?" "How do you think I rang the doorbell?"
Bob The Sperm
Once there was a sperm named Bob. When all the other sperm were just swimming around, Bob was doing sprints and lifting weights all the other sperms asked him one day, "Why don't you just swim around like us?"
Bob replied, with a smirk, "well, when the time comes, I'm gonna be the first one there".
The others told him it was just destiny, but he said it wasn't. So, the day finally came when they were called upon. They were swimming along when Bob pulled ahead of the rest. Suddenly he stopped and turned around and headed back.
The others asked him why he turned around and he said, "back up boys it's a BLOW JOB!" :shock:
Lucy
3 men die and go to heaven. when they get to the pearly gates, god says to them - "you are free to come and go as you please but dont step on any ducks" they all agree and go through the gates. almost immediately one man stands on a duck. all of a sudden this really ugly woman is chained to him.
a couple os days later, the second man steps on a duck, again, he is chained to the ugliest woman imaginable.
the 3rd man manages to go a month without standing on any ducks - and is rewarded at the end of the time by being chained to the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. "wow", he says, "what a treat!"
"Maybe for you," she replies, "I stepped on a duck!"
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
(I hope no ones offended by it 
.
