A couple looking for single male, the couple can't accom so are looking for males who can or a hotel will be fine.
However, if a hotel is the only option, the single male has to pay.
Is this rude or common practice?
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is this rude?
depends on your 'take'.
worlass and I have met two single guys..... one we travelled to them (70 miles) and paid for the hotel..... we also fed him. He was unemployed and we both work. It seemed fair.
the other chap travelled miles and miles... and we again paid for the hotel and fed him too. We saw that as meeting him half way as he put fuel in his car and he worked. That seemed fair.
I have met single guys on my own and they have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have gone half.
Depends on what I deem to be fair and I agree it before hand.
worlass and I have met two single guys..... one we travelled to them (70 miles) and paid for the hotel..... we also fed him. He was unemployed and we both work. It seemed fair.
the other chap travelled miles and miles... and we again paid for the hotel and fed him too. We saw that as meeting him half way as he put fuel in his car and he worked. That seemed fair.
I have met single guys on my own and they have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have gone half.
Depends on what I deem to be fair and I agree it before hand.
Quote by splendid_
depends on your 'take'.
worlass and I have met two single guys..... one we travelled to them (70 miles) and paid for the hotel..... we also fed him. He was unemployed and we both work. It seemed fair.
the other chap travelled miles and miles... and we again paid for the hotel and fed him too. We saw that as meeting him half way as he put fuel in his car and he worked. That seemed fair.
I have met single guys on my own and they have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have gone half.
Depends on what I deem to be fair and I agree it before hand.
i suppose there is no answer then!
i would have thought though that an even split would be the most fair option (just talking about hotel rooms, not petrol, food etc..)
when i see this it really sickens me, what are they a comodity to be bought?
ffs are they not there to be getting some fun??
i actually think tgere is a massive lack of decent singe guys out there, and would never expect a guy to pay for the privledge of meeting me.
i wouldnt want that pressure, it takes the fun out of it.
im much the same in a pub in accepting drinks, i dont want to feel obliged to spend time with them afterwards.
if the other peopel have booked a room anyway and the play is an addition then thats for them to decide, but i would expect then that its their holiday and why should i pay for it.
if they cant accommodate then its only fair if they at least split hotel costs if you cant accommodate aswel.
xx fem xx
sorry pissed off with being told us singles should be grateful that couples invite us in to play so we should pay.
ffs are they not there to be getting some fun??
i actually think tgere is a massive lack of decent singe guys out there, and would never expect a guy to pay for the privledge of meeting me.
i wouldnt want that pressure, it takes the fun out of it.
im much the same in a pub in accepting drinks, i dont want to feel obliged to spend time with them afterwards.
if the other peopel have booked a room anyway and the play is an addition then thats for them to decide, but i would expect then that its their holiday and why should i pay for it.
if they cant accommodate then its only fair if they at least split hotel costs if you cant accommodate aswel.
xx fem xx
sorry pissed off with being told us singles should be grateful that couples invite us in to play so we should pay.
I think it's rude - split the room cost between however many are there is how I always work. If they are a couple they pay 2/3 and you pay 1/3 - simple.
Otherwise, I'd suggest the money you're being 'made' to pay might be better invested in an escort.. at least then you can guarantee what you're getting :thumbup:
Well said that lady
x
Otherwise, I'd suggest the money you're being 'made' to pay might be better invested in an escort.. at least then you can guarantee what you're getting :thumbup:
Quote by fem_4_taboo
i actually think tgere is a massive lack of decent singe guys out there, and would never expect a guy to pay for the privledge of meeting me.
Well said that lady
x
Quote by splendid_
depends on your 'take'.
worlass and I have met two single guys..... one we travelled to them (70 miles) and paid for the hotel..... we also fed him. He was unemployed and we both work. It seemed fair.
the other chap travelled miles and miles... and we again paid for the hotel and fed him too. We saw that as meeting him half way as he put fuel in his car and he worked. That seemed fair.
I have met single guys on my own and they have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have paid.
I have met single guys on my own and I have gone half.
Depends on what I deem to be fair and I agree it before hand.
How much, luv?
Quote by fem_4_taboo
when i see this it really sickens me, what are they a comodity to be bought?
ffs are they not there to be getting some fun??
i actually think tgere is a massive lack of decent singe guys out there, and would never expect a guy to pay for the privledge of meeting me.
i wouldnt want that pressure, it takes the fun out of it.
im much the same in a pub in accepting drinks, i dont want to feel obliged to spend time with them afterwards.
if the other peopel have booked a room anyway and the play is an addition then thats for them to decide, but i would expect then that its their holiday and why should i pay for it.
if they cant accommodate then its only fair if they at least split hotel costs if you cant accommodate aswel.
xx fem xx
sorry pissed off with being told us singles should be grateful that couples invite us in to play so we
should pay.
As Bioke says, well said.
And I also agree with what Bioke says when he says how simple the sums are - 3 people, costs split 3 ways, unless an arrangement is said, in the instances given by splendid.
So a hotel room costs say £84, split three ways is....28 quid each. What happens if he only has a 50 pound note? 
Seriously though.....we have never met a guy in a hotel anyways but, I would expect him to pick up at least half the ammount.
If he said about going thirds, which I do not think he would, we would not meet him as would think he was being a tight arse. And seeing as he would be shagging mrs777 then I would expect half without doubt.
Seriously though.....we have never met a guy in a hotel anyways but, I would expect him to pick up at least half the ammount.
If he said about going thirds, which I do not think he would, we would not meet him as would think he was being a tight arse. And seeing as he would be shagging mrs777 then I would expect half without doubt.
Master of Sex
We definitely wouldn't expect to pay 2/3 of a hotel bill! And any guy who suggested it would be hard pressed to get a meet in my humble opinion.
We haven't had an arranged meet in a hotel but IF we did, and both sides had travelled a similar distance then, as a couple, we'd expect to pay no more than half.
If you use the £84 bench mark again, why should we pay £56 and the guy only £28 when we could go to a club for less and get more choice? He certainly wouldn't get into ANY club I know of for £28.
I'd say that for a single guy, £42 for a night of horny sex with no competition from other guys (as in a club scenario) would be a bargain!
We haven't had an arranged meet in a hotel but IF we did, and both sides had travelled a similar distance then, as a couple, we'd expect to pay no more than half.
If you use the £84 bench mark again, why should we pay £56 and the guy only £28 when we could go to a club for less and get more choice? He certainly wouldn't get into ANY club I know of for £28.
I'd say that for a single guy, £42 for a night of horny sex with no competition from other guys (as in a club scenario) would be a bargain!
or a evening with a lovely single guy who is a genuine swinger who is fun to be with, have a laugh tuned into everyones needs, clean respectfull and you dont have to put up with other guys trying their luck, or you get to the club and there are no guys there you like? plus you get a nice hotel room to spend the night in once the 3rd party has left.
priceless
lol
xx fem xx
priceless
lol
xx fem xx
Sex God
Quote by Sugar-n-pom
We definitely wouldn't expect to pay 2/3 of a hotel bill! And any guy who suggested it would be hard pressed to get a meet in my humble opinion.
We haven't had an arranged meet in a hotel but IF we did, and both sides had travelled a similar distance then, as a couple, we'd expect to pay no more than half.
If you use the £84 bench mark again, why should we pay £56 and the guy only £28 when we could go to a club for less and get more choice? He certainly wouldn't get into ANY club I know of for £28.
I'd say that for a single guy, £42 for a night of horny sex with no competition from other guys (as in a club scenario) would be a bargain!
We'd go with this scenarion like Sugar-n-pom
It is funny that the single fems contribution to this subject, is the opposite to what a lot of " couples " would do.
I agree that a single guy would sometimes pay a lot to go to a club, with no guarantee of playing.
If he paid at least half and got a shag then am sure most guys would think that was worth it. Plus no competition from other guys. If I was single I would pay the whole ammount just for that.
I agree that a single guy would sometimes pay a lot to go to a club, with no guarantee of playing.
If he paid at least half and got a shag then am sure most guys would think that was worth it. Plus no competition from other guys. If I was single I would pay the whole ammount just for that.
Sex God
So to the couples who think the guy should pay more than a third, are you saying that as a couple you are bringing more to the play and so should pay less? And what would you say to three singles meeting up in the same way for a mmf/ffm? Is one of the three in that equation meant to pay more?
If none of you can accommodate and all are getting the same out of it (a successful night of play with likeminded adults) then I cannot see why the accommodation costs shouldn't be split equally between all three.
I think now I actually know why I shy away from playing with couples - I would hate to feel obliged to anyone, or grateful that I was being allowed to be there...
Or hang on, as a single bi female, do I get to go free since we are allegedly an elusive commodity on a site like this?!
That would obviously be ludicrous. Everyone involved should share the cost just as they share the play.
(Unless as Splendid says, an arrangement has been made prior to the meet based on travel or other circumstances. I'm cool with that and - heaven forbid, even as a single female - I have made arrangements and paid for stuff when I have felt it was polite to do so.)
As for guys expecting you to pay 2/3 of a bill being hard pressed to get a meet - I think that is daft. Bordering a tad on the arrogant even.
Ooooh, I'm glad I'm a single and only have to square my own conscience over how I behave!
If none of you can accommodate and all are getting the same out of it (a successful night of play with likeminded adults) then I cannot see why the accommodation costs shouldn't be split equally between all three.
I think now I actually know why I shy away from playing with couples - I would hate to feel obliged to anyone, or grateful that I was being allowed to be there...
Or hang on, as a single bi female, do I get to go free since we are allegedly an elusive commodity on a site like this?!
That would obviously be ludicrous. Everyone involved should share the cost just as they share the play.
(Unless as Splendid says, an arrangement has been made prior to the meet based on travel or other circumstances. I'm cool with that and - heaven forbid, even as a single female - I have made arrangements and paid for stuff when I have felt it was polite to do so.)
As for guys expecting you to pay 2/3 of a bill being hard pressed to get a meet - I think that is daft. Bordering a tad on the arrogant even.
Ooooh, I'm glad I'm a single and only have to square my own conscience over how I behave!
Sex God
I think it all depends on circumstance and I would discuss hotel arrangements with anyone I played with and take it from there. I would never 'expect' for someone else to pay for a hotel room. If I was feeling flush and the person I wanted to play with was skint then I'd have no problems paying for the room and not give it another thought.
What I don't like it the way people mix up paying for a room with the actual playing. I would never expect someone to pay a certain amount for the room just because they get to shag my other half :shock: To me that is moving away from what swinging is really about.
What I don't like it the way people mix up paying for a room with the actual playing. I would never expect someone to pay a certain amount for the room just because they get to shag my other half :shock: To me that is moving away from what swinging is really about.
Sex God
Quote by poshkate
I think it all depends on circumstance and I would discuss hotel arrangements with anyone I played with and take it from there. I would never 'expect' for someone else to pay for a hotel room. If I was feeling flush and the person I wanted to play with was skint then I'd have no problems paying for the room and not give it another thought.
What I don't like it the way people mix up paying for a room with the actual playing. I would never expect someone to pay a certain amount for the room just because they get to shag my other half :shock: To me that is moving away from what swinging is really about.
:thumbup: I waffled in a vaguely rant-like and indignant fashion... you Princess Kate summed it all up nicely!
Hear, hear.
Quote by poshkate
I think it all depends on circumstance and I would discuss hotel arrangements with anyone I played with and take it from there. I would never 'expect' for someone else to pay for a hotel room. If I was feeling flush and the person I wanted to play with was skint then I'd have no problems paying for the room and not give it another thought.
What I don't like it the way people mix up paying for a room with the actual playing. I would never expect someone to pay a certain amount for the room just because they get to shag my other half :shock: To me that is moving away from what swinging is really about.
Oh, but I was going to offer you 50p and a chewed toffee for easy .....
Sex God
I am sure that if it was a couple looking for a single bi fem, they would be more than happy to pay two-thirds.... gotta love a double standard
anyway the way i look at it has always been halfs if we are doing that.... after all are we not all getting something out of it...
I saw it in someones profile yesterday (we were probably looking at the same one) and remember thinking "how arrogent are you?" just move onto the next one...
i have more self respect for myself than that, and its worth more than what sex is worth
gotta love a double standardanyway the way i look at it has always been halfs if we are doing that.... after all are we not all getting something out of it...
I saw it in someones profile yesterday (we were probably looking at the same one) and remember thinking "how arrogent are you?" just move onto the next one...
i have more self respect for myself than that, and its worth more than what sex is worth
Quote by poshkate
What I don't like it the way people mix up paying for a room with the actual playing. I would never expect someone to pay a certain amount for the room just because they get to shag my other half :shock: To me that is moving away from what swinging is really about.
Hit the nail on the head - the idea the guy should pay because he gets to shag the wife is for me not in the spirit of swinging, is more like pimping her out to get a free room
As an elusive bi fem I have had couples offer to pay for a room for us to play in, while a nice offer I wouldn't accept that either unless they are staying the night there anyway and I am just visiting for play.
If it was a room booked because no one could accom but all going home after or all staying the night then I would want to pay towards the room, and usually end up booking the room. I have never been a kept woman and dont intend to start, for one it would make be feel like I owed them something (even if they didnt make if feel like it).
Sex God
Quote by essex34m
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/289639.html
I'm sticking with my response in that thread.
Interestingly, my question there about whether the opinion would differ if the single was female rather than a male went unanswered...
*rides off on rocking horse into the wood where the bears shit looking for the holy grail*
:mrgreen:
As I have already stated, we have never met in a hotel, and to be honest never would. I think it seems a bit sordid somehow, but then again that is just my opinion.
Like many things in life, we make whatever rules we like, if rules is what you can call them. If people do not like that then we do not meet...simple.
That is not arrogance just purely choice. We have a choice to meet people or not, the same as we decide where we want to meet people.
If we want to meet people we usually invite them to our house. Far more relaxed and no money to pay by anyone.
We met a guy at the weekend. We entertained him in our home, and all we asked is that he brought a bottle of wine which he did.
I would not pay whatever the going rate is for a hotel when we have our home, which I feel more comfortable in anyways.
All this is horses for courses really. What is right for one is not always right for someone else....it's called choices.
Like many things in life, we make whatever rules we like, if rules is what you can call them. If people do not like that then we do not meet...simple.
That is not arrogance just purely choice. We have a choice to meet people or not, the same as we decide where we want to meet people.
If we want to meet people we usually invite them to our house. Far more relaxed and no money to pay by anyone.
We met a guy at the weekend. We entertained him in our home, and all we asked is that he brought a bottle of wine which he did.
I would not pay whatever the going rate is for a hotel when we have our home, which I feel more comfortable in anyways.
All this is horses for courses really. What is right for one is not always right for someone else....it's called choices.
Sex God
Quote by kentswingers777
If we want to meet people we usually invite them to our house. Far more relaxed and no money to pay by anyone.
We met a guy at the weekend. We entertained him in our home, and all we asked is that he brought a bottle of wine which he did.
Sounds great Kent - and if I was at liberty to entertain at home (I am sometimes) then that would be my kind of arrangement too!
I think that what made it all sound so clinical earlier in the thread was the link with hotel costs and playing.
Oh and Kenty... don't knock hotel sex - I find sordid intimacy can be deliciously and anonymously fun at times!
Sex God
Whilst I hear what you're saying Kenty (although I totally disagree with the sordid bit, my approach to the hotel thing is much more positive), I have a safety issue to consider.
I'm a single girl. I don't necessarily want people to know where I live, nor do I want to invite a complete stranger into my home.
Meeting in a hotel is a much better option, not to mention it saves on washing!
But then I don't suppose you do the washing in your house so that's probably not even entered your head!
I realise it's your opinion but not all of us have the luxury of a partner for support. That goes for meeting couples and single blokes. It works the same... I'm not sure I'd be hugely comfortable meeting in someone else's home as a single girl, neutral territory is much better for me and I'm happy to pay my share. :mrgreen:
I'm a single girl. I don't necessarily want people to know where I live, nor do I want to invite a complete stranger into my home.
Meeting in a hotel is a much better option, not to mention it saves on washing!
But then I don't suppose you do the washing in your house so that's probably not even entered your head! I realise it's your opinion but not all of us have the luxury of a partner for support. That goes for meeting couples and single blokes. It works the same... I'm not sure I'd be hugely comfortable meeting in someone else's home as a single girl, neutral territory is much better for me and I'm happy to pay my share. :mrgreen:
Quote by Dirtygirly
Whilst I hear what you're saying Kenty (although I totally disagree with the sordid bit, my approach to the hotel thing is much more positive), I have a safety issue to consider.
I'm a single girl. I don't necessarily want people to know where I live, nor do I want to invite a complete stranger into my home.
Meeting in a hotel is a much better option, not to mention it saves on washing!
I realise it's your opinion but not all of us have the luxury of a partner for support. That goes for meeting couples and single blokes. It works the same... I'm not sure I'd be hugely comfortable meeting in someone else's home as a single girl, neutral territory is much better for me and I'm happy to pay my share. :mrgreen:
I fully understand the safety issue, the same as I can understand others points of view. I am only saying what WE would or would not do. That does not mean that is right for everyone.
As for your comment on the washing, which is very sexist :wink: I do do the washing at times. Also the hoovering and the polishing, and making the bed and cooking the dinner.....ya get my drift? :wink:
Not all guys are undomesticated or lazy.
