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Its been a Strange Morning

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frogster
Sex God
Its been a strange morning…….. the story so far…….
7:15 AM woke up by mobile text from my new lady friend of three weeks “do you want a cuddle”.
7:16 AM decided what I needed most was a pee…. So sat on the loo responding to text when house phone went off…. “Look out your window”
7:16:AM saw my new lady friend in her car outside my house
7:17 AM feeling of deep joy
7:30 AM feeling of very deep joy
8:30AM after much deep joy, decide we need food……. Both get dressed and pop to the local butty shop for a take away breakfast
8:50 AM realise I have left the house keys indoors
9:03 AM borrow a ladder from my neighbour, my small front bedroom window is open, send new lady friend up ladder to get through window and open door
9:05 AM realise that she is stuck halfway through the window
9:08 AM with the aid of two neighbours to hold ladder I go up and push her through
9:15 AM we decide that this is not one of the most discreet affairs she has ever had
9:40 AM my ex (not explained to her that she is my ex yet) phones to say she is on her way over
9:41 AM hasty exit by new lady friend, followed by quick tidy up
10:03 AM ex arrives, sees lipstick on a cup in sink, and proceeds to inform me about my dubious parentage.
10:07 AM my ex is just behind me in the open doorway, about to leave, not at all happy, now knowing she is my ex (just as another neighbour comes out of their door and shouts, jokingly “nice arse on that bird this morning up that ladder”)….
10:09 AM cut my foot on the broken cup (the one with lipstick on) now smashed on my kitchen floor, as I go to the sink for cold water to put on my slapped face
10:15 AM decide to go back to bed and start the day again
This is a true account of my morning… They say fact is stranger than fiction…. Well this morning bloody was…………
Comments?
Angel_Chat
Sex God
Oooops!! Sounds like a perfect advert for why you should finish one relationship before starting the next one. Sadly, we humans seem to forget these lessons.
Bluddy funny story for someone not involved though rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
(I didn't mean to come across as though I was lecturing btw, I've certainly been guilty of starting another before the current one is properly over redface)
frogster
Sex God
Quote by Angel Chat
(I didn't mean to come across as though I was lecturing btw, I've certainly been guilty of starting another before the current one is properly over redface)

Yep, I deserved it !!!!
There is however, sometimes that overlap.... you don't always know when a new door is opening the right time to close the one behind you! and in my defence, it was only a few days overlap!.....
Oh well...... onwards and upwards...... I am happier where I am now (with new relationship) than where I was (with old relationship)... just don't like hurting people! :cry:
Missy
Sex God
rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Oh frogster :lol2: ......... couldn't happen again if you tried!! :lol2:
I don't know what's more incredible, the misfortunes all happening at once - or that there really is a :shock: :shock: :shock:
MikeNorth
Sex God
Hi Frogster, as I said to you in the chatroom earlier, I hope you're now recovered from your morning. At least you remembered to wear your watch! lol
Mike.
frogster
Sex God
Quote by MISSCHIEF
or that there really is a :shock: :shock: :shock:

I think in this case 7:15AM on a Saturday only existed as it is the start of a new relationship, had it been say a year in to the relationship, my reply would have been "well let yourself in and bring me a brew up".... there again she wouldnt have made the effort to come round I suppose.....I dunno.... my cut foot still hurts :cry:
Quote by MikeNorth
At least you remembered to wear your watch!

Yep, but I must admit to gueestimating a few of the times.... smile
I reckon I could sell this story to a sitcom......... Nah they would say it's to far fetched !!! biggrin
MikeNorth
Sex God
Frogster wrote:
I reckon I could sell this story to a sitcom......... Nah they would say it's to far fetched

Yes, almost, though it's a bit like the sort of thing Brian Rix used to write for the Whitehall Theatre farces....
lol
Mike.
Steve_Lincs
Sex God
Quote by MikeNorth
Frogster wrote: I reckon I could sell this story to a sitcom......... Nah they would say it's to far fetched

Yes, almost, though it's a bit like the sort of thing Brian Rix used to write for the Whitehall Theatre farces....
lol
Mike.
I must be too young for this,coz i havent got a clue what that is dunno :dunno:
Fun365
Orgasminator
Quote by Steve_Lincs
Frogster wrote: I reckon I could sell this story to a sitcom......... Nah they would say it's to far fetched

Yes, almost, though it's a bit like the sort of thing Brian Rix used to write for the Whitehall Theatre farces....
lol
Mike.
I must be too young for this,coz i havent got a clue what that is dunno :dunno:
Well I am old enough to remember them.. Never funny as far as I was concerned.
But I will doff my proverbial cap to Sir Brian Rix (assuming he is still alive) as he has been Chairman of the charity Mencap for as long as I can remember.
Paul