Id like to offer my current position as :-
chronic depressive on more medication that i care to mention.
working conditions :- up and down....a real rollercoaster of emotions, between giddily happy and paranoidly weepy, devil may care through totally and utterly bleak, futureless 'cant be arsedness' and stress.
Duties Include:- sleeping loads, facebook and swinging heaven, keeping the whole house together and operating efficiently, raising 4 kids, one with special needs (behavioural probs), one a tantrum throwing 5 year old, one a hormonal 11 year old girl and one a hormonal (possibly bi) 15 year old lad......plus being the emotional crutch and voice of reason for a hubby.
Pay :- Incapacity benefit, earache, heartache and love.
(trouble is, I fear this may be a large proportion of SH members secret lives)
position wanted :- chief quality control, McVities Jaffa Cake factory.
feck orf woman!!! :giggle:
oops my good mood just ran out!!!:twisted:
Present position: Early retired due to severe health and disability problems. Position includes staying in bed most days due to pain and mobility problems. Watching daytime TV, ordering food online,trying to run a home when you can't physically do anything. Position comes with small pension, car when able to get out and smoking as much as possible. A perk is trying to keep son and his father from each others throats by voice command only.
Position wanted: Personal shopper for someone with more money than sense and very bad taste. Chauffeur, cook, housekeeper and personal trainer/masseur thrown in. :happy: :silly:
Current position:
Computer systems trainer.
Duties : deliver the same course, every day, same room, same questions, same whinges, different faces - no idea about the names.
Explain the same thing over and over again.
repeat the phrase "read the f*ing manual" over and over again.
Fix the same errors over and over again.
Pay : ok but I never see any of it.
Prospects - being made redundant at some random point in the next 2 years.
Position wanted:
Location finder for the Police.
Duties:
Getting ambiguous or unknown addresses/locations from crime reports/suspects and trawling through new/old maps, aerial photos and other sources.
Pay: police civilian rates.
Prospects: I can see my house from here!
Satisfaction: ENORMOUS.
And it's a real job! (Just can't afford the pay cut)
Current job - Platoon Sergeant Army.
Con's - Work 24/7, 365
Hours worked = below Minimum wage
High risk of death (Bombs, bullets, etc)
Little recognition
Away from home most of the time
Higher insurance premiums
More likely to die at an earlier age (if you survive the bombs & bullets)
Still pay taxes even when fighting in another country!
I'll leave it there, lol
Pro's - Job security (alway's need an army)
Good promotion prospects
Get to see the world (Allthough some places you might not want to see)
Will trade for!? Infact i actually like my job! Go figure.
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) like testing the water in swimming pools for its buoyancy in use.