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Light Relief... I will survive (1000 Posts)

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Mrs TnH has been on my case for over a week to post this, and as I want peace to consider my 1000th post I thought I better put this up as 999...
Here's one for the ladies...
Ok this email only works if you sing along to the tune of' I Will Survive' as you say the words. Good luck getting through it all without laughing, this is hilarious when sung properly...
I Will Survive
At first I was afraid, I was petrified, When you said you had 10 inches Lord I almost died, But I'd spent oh so many yrs just waiting for a man that long, That I grew strong, And I knew that I could take you on. . .
But there you are, Another lie,
I was ready for a big mac and you've bought me a French fry,
I should have known that it was bullshit, Just a sad pathetic dream,
Should have known there was no anaconda lurking in those jeans.
Go on now go,
Walk out the door,
Don't you promise me 10 inches then turn up with only 4,
Weren't you a prat to think I wouldn't catch you out, Don't you know we're only joking when we say size doesn't count!
(Chorus)
I will survive, I will survive,
Cos as long as I have batteries,
then my sex life's gonna thrive,
I will always have good sex with a handful of latex,
I will survive, I will survive. . .hey . hey

It took all my self control not to laugh out loud,
When I saw your little weiner standing tall and proud,
But to hell with all your ego's and to hell with all your needs, Now I'm saving all my lovin for a cordless multispeed,
Go on now go,
Just make a dash,
Last time I saw a prick that small was watching Gladstone run nude hash,
I should have asked for confirmation, Should have asked for referees,
Then I wouldn't have you waving that wee winky thing at me.
Go on now go,
Just hit the track,
Don't you bring me home no tiddlers,
Cos I'll always throw them back,
The only thing that I could do with a prick as small as yours, Is to stick it with a tooth pick Dip it in tomato sauce.
(Chorus)
Go on now go,
Get out of my sight,
I'm going back to my appliance, Cos I know it's length is right,
And if I ever see your tiny tockley at my door, You'll be counting up your inches as you pick em off the floor.

Go on now Go!
You forgot this :karaoke:
Congrats on nearly 1000 biggrin
rotflmao :laughabove: :rotflmao: :laughabove: :rotflmao: :laughabove: :rotflmao:
absolutely brilliant.......you have made my evening
kaz xxx
OOOh so if your at 999 does that now mean that you qualify to be a fireman,uniform and all??????? :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
Quote by Steve_Lincs
You forgot this :karaoke:
Congrats on nearly 1000 biggrin

Thanks Steve... Whoops there goes the thousand. Ok well what better way to celebrate than a joint thread started by Mrs TnH. I hope it gives a few people a grin and look forward to seeing a lot of you in a weeks time.
TnH
Oh Yeah and: :karaoke:
Edit: Nah I do the Ambulance thing Claire ;)
rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Love It xx
wooooooo whoooooooo congrats!
:bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Seen this one before but still makes me laugh! Brill.......
xanaisx
:thumbup:
Nice one
bloody 'ell 1000th posts coming thick and fast these days!
Well Done TallnHairy!!!
keep it up mate. always the voice of reason, with a fair old scattering of complete bollox! ;)
neil x x x x ;)
:bounce: :bounce: well done mr and mrs tnh
He you go babes just for you as i no ya lovet

Shacken but not stared rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Quote by Debbiewebs
He you go babes just for you as i no ya lovet

Shacken but not stared rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

ROTFLMFAO!! :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha:
Well done TnH. :cheers:
Congrats T&H.. look forward to meeting you on Sat.