Limerick Competition - RESULTS

31 Aug 2004

FFS!! There are coach-loads of limerick doers/ limerickers/ limrick type people turning up now!!!! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

31 Aug 2004

sorry i just had to jump on the band wagon

1 Sep 2004

Right........... glad to see a few of you enter into the spirit of this. lol

Sarge you are a natural....... (don't tell anyone - but your doing well wink

)
So there is still time....... Friday is the deadline......... Get Limericking you lot. :!:
Oh...... and the prize is getting better!!!! biggrin

:D :D

1 Sep 2004

there was a young lady from devon
who placed an add on swinging heaven
she asked for at least eight
what she got was a real state
now she will settle for seven

1 Sep 2004

there was a young lady from devon
who placed an add on swinging heaven
her preference was men
by luck she got ten
all by the first name of steven

1 Sep 2004

New to this site - so by way of saying "HI" :-
There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
In it she said
To get in her bed
She'd like men, like her haven, clean-shaven.
Yeah, poor rhyme, so here's another:-
There once was a pair from Khartoum
Took a couple back up to their room
They argued all night
About who had the right
To do what, for how long and to whom.
Cheers
Richard & Sophie :P

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She met a man up north
Starred on page 3 of the "Sport"
And was endeared to the whole of the nation!
Pants i know, but we all have to start somewhere!!!!

1 Sep 2004

Just while I remember it, here is a classic from the 1930's
There was a young lady named Gloria
Who was had by Sir Gerald Du Maurier
Jack Buchanan, Jack Payne
Sir Gerald again
And the band of the Waldorf Astoria

1 Sep 2004

OOOOOOOH - one from school!!!!
There was a young lady from Ealing,
Who had a peculiar feeling.
She lay on her back,
Opened her crack,
and pissed all over the ceiling!!
I know, childish, but i found it funny at the age of 12!!!

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She got no replies, at least none that wern't lies,
Now thats why they call it swinging heaven!
There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She got one from kevin who said he was shaven,
But actualy had a bear in his trousers!
^-- Abit weak i would have to say but hey, havent done one of these for years smile

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon,
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven,
Her request for a penis,
Was misheard to be "pianist",
And she ended up with AndrÃ© Previn!
(sorry) rolleyes

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from devon,
Who placed an ad on swinging heaven,
She had rather a bush,
She liked to keep it hush,hush,
But decided she'd be better of shaven!!
(sorry!!)

1 Sep 2004

I'm still thinking......................... redface

ops: so I will be back later if my :idea: :idea: comes back on !!! lol

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
Her first suitor was Dick,
who finished too quick
So who's next? Her engine's still revvin'

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She met Clive for some humping,
and nude bunjee jumping
Now they're both dangling over the Severn.

1 Sep 2004

There once was a chappy called Ice
Who made badges that were terribly nice,
He came to a munch
met us mad bunch
His avatar pics usually look like mice!
(rofl if that doesn't get the worst rhyme then ..............................)
Calista

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
But her 5pm Jock
with his upside clock
didn't turn up till half past eleven.

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She met a chap who was Jewish
She found him quite prudish
And his bread was distinctly unleavened

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She met a chap who was Catholic
They Screwed in the attic
All the way up the stairway to heaven

1 Sep 2004

Quote by Calista
There once was a chappy called Ice
Who made badges that were terribly nice,
He came to a munch
met us mad bunch
His avatar pics usually look like mice!
(rofl if that doesn't get the worst rhyme then ..............................)
Calista

There was a young lady, Calista
Who offered me one off the wrista
But she started to cry
when I shot in her eye
That's the last time I play naked Twister!
rotflmao

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
Met a Protestant man
Fucked him in a van
(Or was it an old Austin seven?)

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
Met a beautiful Moslem
She didn't mean to bruise him
She's now doing five to eleven

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She found an Agnostic
She found him quite caustic
And sent him away with his hard-on

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She said she was Pagan
Turns out she was no fun
I think she's a bit of a

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She met Zaphod and Trillian,
Vogons by the million,
And a paranoid android called Marvin

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She wanted a spanker
She just got a wanker
But still, it's a start, doncha reckon?

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
Met a Rabbi, so wise,
but could not get a rise,
cos the poor old chap's bread was unleavened.

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady called Vix,
She loved to get out her tits,
Her face was a picture,
you could bet if she met ya,
You'd definately loose all your wits!!

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
She copped off with a Priest
He gave her the yeast
(The chemist is open till seven)

1 Sep 2004

There was a young lady from Devon
Who placed an ad on Swinging Heaven
One guy offered his knob
Just to fill up her gob
And instead put a Chicken Kiev in!