I just found myself writing love in another thread, so I am starting this one. I like thinking about my wife have fun, no not just that all kinds of fun. So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more. I think I love my wife because I can see her having fun with out me. I do not own her, I love her. so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think?
well of course swingers love, i love my mrs i love her to do the cooking i love her to the washing na on a more serious note i would love her even if we were not in this scene ,i dont really know where your going with this mate are you having a bit of a think about you two being in the scene : is something more bothering you if so welcome to pm but hope its not hope you are getting as much out of this as you are putting into it but it sounds like you do really love yours any way all the best
ook mate carry on ,just thought i would ask any way hope you really enjoy it here i know reading it all looks like its upside down but there are still a lot of cany peeps about right of to see what i can bugger up
i think swigers love as much or even more than other couples,you have to have a special kind of trust and friendship to swing ,i am a widower now but my wife and i used to swing and we were devoted to each you dont feel like thatyou can trust each oyher completly, then i wouldnt bother it can ruin a luck to you and your wife.
Quote by LilMissGullable Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes.
Quote by Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. Well IMHO.... i'd say there is less love in your relationship/marriage than what there is in any of the cpls on this site.... All the other cpls on this site, that i have met or spoken too do it together. They talk and take into consideration how the other feels and if they wanna meet the said cpl/single they are chatting to. Very few cpls i know swing seperatly... and if they do there partners know about it, also know exactly where they will be when meeting somebody else.
Read this post and i do think that swinging seperately and not knowing what goes on etc with each others activities sounds very odd, im not knocking it, but its not something me and rachy would do. Its almost like your allowing each other to have affairs that will be overlooked and tollerated, i might be wrong but it sounds like the male half of the couple feels similar and is not happy with the situation either?
Quote by Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. I've had to go bk and read your reply to my Q again... It says you both swing seperatly... And that you talk about what you have done... I don't get the rest.... She knows, she knows u know??? She perfares not to know what, who, where, when...? You just said you talk about what you have done Im confused
Quote by zana2000 Read this post and i do think that swinging seperately and not knowing what goes on etc with each others activities sounds very odd, im not knocking it, but its not something me and rachy would do. Its almost like your allowing each other to have affairs that will be overlooked and tollerated, i might be wrong but it sounds like the male half of the couple feels similar and is not happy with the situation either?
It does not soun at all odd to me, different maybe but that is all In my case h/b whole heartedly enjoys the situation and always knows exactly what is going on and with whom, though he would not consider joining in All relationships are different and as long as everyone is happy, why worry? To me its odd/strange..... what ever you wanna call it.... If you love somebody.... why keep something secret??? Your situation is different Zana2000.... Your "other" half knows you do it but choose's not to.... Which personally.... If i was in a relationship and my partner didn't want to swing... I couldn't do it. Thats just me!! there is a big difference between.... Loving... and being in love with somebody.
Quote by I just found myself writing love in another thread, so I am starting this one. I like thinking about my wife have fun, no not just that all kinds of fun. So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more. I think I love my wife because I can see her having fun with out me. I do not own her, I love her. so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think?
I think love and sex are very distinct objects - having sex with someone doesn't mean that you love them, and being in love with someone doesn't mean that you want to have sex with them... it's all about your own personal definitions I suppose. I love Mr Snesh because of who he is and who he makes me, as well as the cracking sex and the fact that we trust each other enough to be able to bring others in with us sexually without fear of recourse... Layla xx
Quote by LilMissGullable Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. Well IMHO.... i'd say there is less love in your relationship/marriage than what there is in any of the cpls on this site.... All the other cpls on this site, that i have met or spoken too do it together. They talk and take into consideration how the other feels and if they wanna meet the said cpl/single they are chatting to. Very few cpls i know swing seperatly... and if they do there partners know about it, also know exactly where they will be when meeting somebody else. Made the mistake of not reading the whole thread before answering.. think that Lil Miss hit it on the head with her point above
I can only speak from my own experience here, but since Mrs. Pete and me got into the scene we have become so much closer. How do I define that? Well, we talk a lot more, we share more, our conversations are much more intimate than they ever were before we got into the scene. We are much more open about our innermost secrets and feelings. And yes we always swing together. So I guess the answer is, yes we love each other very much, and I would go as far as to say, probably more now than before. Clink clink ……………. that’s my twopeneth
Quote by Snesh Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. Well IMHO.... i'd say there is less love in your relationship/marriage than what there is in any of the cpls on this site.... All the other cpls on this site, that i have met or spoken too do it together. They talk and take into consideration how the other feels and if they wanna meet the said cpl/single they are chatting to. Very few cpls i know swing seperatly... and if they do there partners know about it, also know exactly where they will be when meeting somebody else. Made the mistake of not reading the whole thread before answering.. think that Lil Miss hit it on the head with her point above OK, what do I mean by love? Love is the wish to protect someone, to make them happy and it is sometimes about sharing. On the other hand there is a limit to love, I would not kill to make someone happy. So there is a limit to love, everyone has a different limit, even you. If you do not know who someone is you can not judge if they do or do not love. If you want to get personal PM me.
You put a post asking.... "So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more"???? And to 1 of my Q's... you replied... She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. And then you accuse people of "getting personal".... because you didnt like my follow up answer to this.. Nobody is getting personal... and Yes...I don't know you.... But you chose to put this up for open discussion... and I voiced my opinion... Just like everybody else that has replied to this....
Quote by Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. Well IMHO.... i'd say there is less love in your relationship/marriage than what there is in any of the cpls on this site.... All the other cpls on this site, that i have met or spoken too do it together. They talk and take into consideration how the other feels and if they wanna meet the said cpl/single they are chatting to. Very few cpls i know swing seperatly... and if they do there partners know about it, also know exactly where they will be when meeting somebody else. Made the mistake of not reading the whole thread before answering.. think that Lil Miss hit it on the head with her point above OK, what do I mean by love? Love is the wish to protect someone, to make them happy and it is sometimes about sharing. On the other hand there is a limit to love, I would not kill to make someone happy. So there is a limit to love, everyone has a different limit, even you. If you do not know who someone is you can not judge if they do or do not love. If you want to get personal PM me. And since you're quoting me there to, can I just say that when you post on a public forum and ask for opinions don't get pissed off when people give them (thats akin to people going on Trisha and screaming 'you can't judge me' when you have actually put yourself up to be judged!) In fairness to the people who responded, no one really judged you and most people actually answered your initial question. You can't come on here expecting to get the answer that you want to hear and nothing else - this forum contains a lot of people of differing opinions and from different backgrounds and experiences - as such their replies ware likely to be just as varied. I suggest you got some responses that struck too close to home and instead of accepting them and maybe examining why they grated you so much you played the 'you can't judge me' card. This is a forum discussion, I don't have anything to say to you in private that I wouldn't do in public, so don't worry about the need to PM you. I'll say anything I need to here Layla
Quote by I just found myself writing love in another thread, so I am starting this one. I like thinking about my wife have fun, no not just that all kinds of fun. So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more. I think I love my wife because I can see her having fun with out me. I do not own her, I love her. so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think?
I think you shouldn't put sex and love in the same basket. They are separate entities that meet up every now and again. I know my memory is fading but I definately remember swinging as a sex thing.
Quote by Snesh Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. Well IMHO.... i'd say there is less love in your relationship/marriage than what there is in any of the cpls on this site.... All the other cpls on this site, that i have met or spoken too do it together. They talk and take into consideration how the other feels and if they wanna meet the said cpl/single they are chatting to. Very few cpls i know swing seperatly... and if they do there partners know about it, also know exactly where they will be when meeting somebody else. Made the mistake of not reading the whole thread before answering.. think that Lil Miss hit it on the head with her point above OK, what do I mean by love? Love is the wish to protect someone, to make them happy and it is sometimes about sharing. On the other hand there is a limit to love, I would not kill to make someone happy. So there is a limit to love, everyone has a different limit, even you. If you do not know who someone is you can not judge if they do or do not love. If you want to get personal PM me. And since you're quoting me there to, can I just say that when you post on a public forum and ask for opinions don't get pissed off when people give them (thats akin to people going on Trisha and screaming 'you can't judge me' when you have actually put yourself up to be judged!) In fairness to the people who responded, no one really judged you and most people actually answered your initial question. You can't come on here expecting to get the answer that you want to hear and nothing else - this forum contains a lot of people of differing opinions and from different backgrounds and experiences - as such their replies ware likely to be just as varied. I suggest you got some responses that struck too close to home and instead of accepting them and maybe examining why they grated you so much you played the 'you can't judge me' card. This is a forum discussion, I don't have anything to say to you in private that I wouldn't do in public, so don't worry about the need to PM you. I'll say anything I need to here Layla OK so will you say what love means to you, or just tell me how to think.
Quote by Snesh Am i right in thinking ur in the scene and your wife doesn't know??
She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. Well IMHO.... i'd say there is less love in your relationship/marriage than what there is in any of the cpls on this site.... All the other cpls on this site, that i have met or spoken too do it together. They talk and take into consideration how the other feels and if they wanna meet the said cpl/single they are chatting to. Very few cpls i know swing seperatly... and if they do there partners know about it, also know exactly where they will be when meeting somebody else. Made the mistake of not reading the whole thread before answering.. think that Lil Miss hit it on the head with her point above OK, what do I mean by love? Love is the wish to protect someone, to make them happy and it is sometimes about sharing. On the other hand there is a limit to love, I would not kill to make someone happy. So there is a limit to love, everyone has a different limit, even you. If you do not know who someone is you can not judge if they do or do not love. If you want to get personal PM me. And since you're quoting me there to, can I just say that when you post on a public forum and ask for opinions don't get pissed off when people give them (thats akin to people going on Trisha and screaming 'you can't judge me' when you have actually put yourself up to be judged!) In fairness to the people who responded, no one really judged you and most people actually answered your initial question. You can't come on here expecting to get the answer that you want to hear and nothing else - this forum contains a lot of people of differing opinions and from different backgrounds and experiences - as such their replies ware likely to be just as varied. I suggest you got some responses that struck too close to home and instead of accepting them and maybe examining why they grated you so much you played the 'you can't judge me' card. This is a forum discussion, I don't have anything to say to you in private that I wouldn't do in public, so don't worry about the need to PM you. I'll say anything I need to here Layla OK so will you tell us what love means to you, or just tell me how wrong I am.
I no longer see the point in this topic anymore.... As said before, you put this up for discussion and then get all defensive when other discuss it... Nobody is telling you what to do, but correct me if im wrong... Did u or did you not say... so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think? Therefore you have no right kicking off when u hear something you don't wanna!!!! I think the best thing for this is to be locked on the grounds of.... Nobody can answer on it because you get all offended. Where is that Padlock!!!!
Quote by Lilmiss You put a post asking.... "So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more"???? And to 1 of my Q's... you replied... She swings I swing, but not together. We talk about it but not what we have done. She know, she knows I know. The rules seem to have built themselves over the years. She prefers not to know my what, who, where, when. I would like to swing together, we respect each other wishes. And then you accuse people of "getting personal".... because you didnt like my follow up answer to this.. Nobody is getting personal... and Yes...I don't know you.... But you chose to put this up for open discussion... and I voiced my opinion... Just like everybody else that has replied to this....
Any matrix fans will tell you that love is a word and the semantics of the definition is based on personal experience and perception. We define our own world from our own childhood experiences and the subliminal conditioning that society exposes us to, however, we are also influenced by a host of other sources such as books, films, friends, ex partners and so on. . The definition of love varies according to the culture, belief system (if any), customs, and social etiquette. For example in some countries a man can have x amount of wifes etc whlst in another the same man would be considered a bigomist. Acceptance of the norm or questioning it would bring you closer to discovering who you are and what you expect from yourself and others. Love is just a word; what really matters is the meaning that we give by definition based on your personal experience. With love comes expectations, illusions, dreams, comfort, reassurance, hurt, pain etc. Whilst I am still a virgin to the swinging scene. Transactional Analysis may offer some of the answers to the question initially posted here. Most couples who are into the swininging scene have reached a state of adult consent that brings into play "I am OK You are OK". Isaac Newton would argue that the sum derived from a "positive number" and "a negative number" equals a "negative number". So for a couple to enjoy the swinging scene both partners would have to be in agreement based on the law of action and consequences derived from their personal values, and their definition of love which may differ anyone elses definition. Love in my opinion is a child like emotion that is experienced through our childhood giving us our sense of worth and self esteem. So the dynamic of two child like personilities giving each other consent to be naughty can also be derived from transactional analysis. As humans we evolve and we make choices that would appear to be the right ones at the time based on our circumstances, environment etc. However, if at any point you begin to question the choices you've made then doubt might just creep in and then there is a danger that you could start to project your doubts on to your partner and that's when things can get very tricky. As for one group of people with a "label" loving more than or less than another group is pure nonsense..I am afraid that we will never know the answer to that one because it is human nature to feel one thing and reveal a series of smoke screens to the world. Who would question the old couple who are not swingers but have just celebrated 40 years of marriage, and they still walk down the beach hand in hand. Have they loved less or more than a couple who happen to be swingers....That would depend on the dynamics of the relationship. Which brings me to my final point in that "relationship" is yet another word that gives meaning to a set of protocols that differ from couple to couple and does not necessarily involve "love" as habitual conditioning can also be a symptom of being in denial that one's relationship has passed it's sell by date but we continue to accomodate and even agree to certain terms that may not be favourable because of our fear of the unknown
Quote by migsymalone Any matrix fans will tell you that love is a word and the semantics of the definition is based on personal experience and perception. We define our own world from our own childhood experiences and the subliminal conditioning that society exposes us to, however, we are also influenced by a host of other sources such as books, films, friends, ex partners and so on. . The definition of love varies according to the culture, belief system (if any), customs, and social etiquette. For example in some countries a man can have x amount of wifes etc whlst in another the same man would be considered a bigomist. Acceptance of the norm or questioning it would bring you closer to discovering who you are and what you expect from yourself and others. Love is just a word; what really matters is the meaning that we give by definition based on your personal experience. With love comes expectations, illusions, dreams, comfort, reassurance, hurt, pain etc. Whilst I am still a virgin to the swinging scene. Transactional Analysis may offer some of the answers to the question initially posted here. Most couples who are into the swininging scene have reached a state of adult consent that brings into play "I am OK You are OK". Isaac Newton would argue that the sum derived from a "positive number" and "a negative number" equals a "negative number". So for a couple to enjoy the swinging scene both partners would have to be in agreement based on the law of action and consequences derived from their personal values, and their definition of love which may differ anyone elses definition. Love in my opinion is a child like emotion that is experienced through our childhood giving us our sense of worth and self esteem. So the dynamic of two child like personilities giving each other consent to be naughty can also be derived from transactional analysis. As humans we evolve and we make choices that would appear to be the right ones at the time based on our circumstances, environment etc. However, if at any point you begin to question the choices you've made then doubt might just creep in and then there is a danger that you could start to project your doubts on to your partner and that's when things can get very tricky. As for one group of people with a "label" loving more than or less than another group is pure nonsense..I am afraid that we will never know the answer to that one because it is human nature to feel one thing and reveal a series of smoke screens to the world. Who would question the old couple who are not swingers but have just celebrated 40 years of marriage, and they still walk down the beach hand in hand. Have they loved less or more than a couple who happen to be swingers....That would depend on the dynamics of the relationship. Which brings me to my final point in that "relationship" is yet another word that gives meaning to a set of protocols that differ from couple to couple and does not necessarily involve "love" as habitual conditioning can also be a symptom of being in denial that one's relationship has passed it's sell by date but we continue to accomodate and even agree to certain terms that may not be favourable because of our fear of the unknown
Well.... i obviously haven't watched matrix!!! WTF.... is all that about.....? Nobody has ask what's the definition of LOVE or what it mean....He asked...... So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more.?
OK so will you tell us what love means to you, or just tell me how wrong I am.
If you read back to the start of this thread TMann you will see that I DID do that, before I agreed with Lil' Miss's point... I'd quote it below for you but don't know how to... Also, I never said 'how wrong you were' so don't act like the wounded one here - you asked a question, we all answered. It is that simple Try reading an entire thread and ensuring you understand all written before you reply
Just to prove that I *did* write my 'definition' of love.... here's the quote...
Quote by Snesh I just found myself writing love in another thread, so I am starting this one. I like thinking about my wife have fun, no not just that all kinds of fun. So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more. I think I love my wife because I can see her having fun with out me. I do not own her, I love her. so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think?
I think love and sex are very distinct objects - having sex with someone doesn't mean that you love them, and being in love with someone doesn't mean that you want to have sex with them... it's all about your own personal definitions I suppose. I love Mr Snesh because of who he is and who he makes me, as well as the cracking sex and the fact that we trust each other enough to be able to bring others in with us sexually without fear of recourse... Layla xx
Quote by Snesh I just found myself writing love in another thread, so I am starting this one. I like thinking about my wife have fun, no not just that all kinds of fun. So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more. I think I love my wife because I can see her having fun with out me. I do not own her, I love her. so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think?
I think love and sex are very distinct objects - having sex with someone doesn't mean that you love them, and being in love with someone doesn't mean that you want to have sex with them... it's all about your own personal definitions I suppose. I love Mr Snesh because of who he is and who he makes me, as well as the cracking sex and the fact that we trust each other enough to be able to bring others in with us sexually without fear of recourse... Layla xx Was that the bit you was looking for snesh?????
Quote by Lilmiss I just found myself writing love in another thread, so I am starting this one. I like thinking about my wife have fun, no not just that all kinds of fun. So i ask myself is it that people who swing do not love, have not found love, or do they love more. I think I love my wife because I can see her having fun with out me. I do not own her, I love her. so here I am, that's what I think.....What do you think?
I think love and sex are very distinct objects - having sex with someone doesn't mean that you love them, and being in love with someone doesn't mean that you want to have sex with them... it's all about your own personal definitions I suppose. I love Mr Snesh because of who he is and who he makes me, as well as the cracking sex and the fact that we trust each other enough to be able to bring others in with us sexually without fear of recourse... Layla xx Was that the bit you was looking for snesh????? Lol - thanks lil miss!!
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: is something more bothering you if so welcome to pm but hope its not hope you are getting as much out of this as you are putting into it but it sounds like you do really love yours any way all the best
