Metrification Of Personal adverts

22 Nov 2004

An EU directive published today.
All measurments in relation to anatomical parts of the male of female bodys must now be quoted in metric units. If not the offender could be liable for prosecution under section 6969/bj4u of Europen law. For referance the following measurments now apply.
Penisis
3" becomes
4" becomes
5" becomes 127mm
6" becomes
7" becomes
8" becomes
9" becomes
Breasts
All Cup sizes to remain as before
32" becomes 812mm A B C
34" becomes 863mm A B C D
36" becomes A B C D
38" becomes A B C D
I think everyone needs to alter their ads and post before they get into trouble wink

Phil

22 Nov 2004

I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

22 Nov 2004

Same problem here... are my boobs not EU recognised?!?! :shock:

22 Nov 2004

Quote by foxylady 123
I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

Not quite, however, in order to promote equal trading standards accross the whole EU, the term 'cup' has been rationalised. A cup by definition can be held in one hand, therefore anything over a handful can no longer be referred to as a cup size.
Several commitees are currently considering an alternative nomencalture for those who cannot be contained within the current parameters.
The project is currently in the consultation phase, and any suggestions will be fully considered.
Hope this helps
lhk
Kat

22 Nov 2004

Quote by KitKat
I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

Not quite, however, in order to promote equal trading standards accross the whole EU, the term 'cup' has been rationalised. A cup by definition can be held in one hand, therefore anything over a handful can no longer be referred to as a cup size.
Several commitees are currently considering an alternative nomencalture for those who cannot be contained within the current parameters.
The project is currently in the consultation phase, and any suggestions will be fully considered.
Hope this helps
lhk
Kat
But surely this is dependant on the size of the hand? Iaam fortunate enough to know some very big hands!!

22 Nov 2004

And I thought I was having trouble getting bras to fit before!!!!!!!

22 Nov 2004

Quote by MQ
And I thought I was having trouble getting bras to fit before!!!!!!!

I can see it now - An exclusive designer range -The MQ! - make sure you get your royalties M! wink

22 Nov 2004

MQs Bras for Busty Babes and Buxom Birds hmmm!

22 Nov 2004

Quote by MQ
MQs Bras for Busty Babes and Buxom Birds hmmm!

Remember this thread when you bank your first million M! wink

I'd offer to model them myself but I just haven't got what it takes! lol

22 Nov 2004

The EU is always sticking its oar in where it is not wanted, I'm with MQ on this.

22 Nov 2004

Quote by foxylady 123
I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

Not quite, however, in order to promote equal trading standards accross the whole EU, the term 'cup' has been rationalised. A cup by definition can be held in one hand, therefore anything over a handful can no longer be referred to as a cup size.
Several commitees are currently considering an alternative nomencalture for those who cannot be contained within the current parameters.
The project is currently in the consultation phase, and any suggestions will be fully considered.
Hope this helpslhkKatBut surely this is dependant on the size of the hand? Iaam fortunate enough to know some very big hands!! Traditionally, a hand is held to be 4 inches, however, diversification with the EU has required that this over simplified measurment should be replaced with and altogether more practical system.
This will, of course, remove any need to actually measure breasts. The utterly brilliant conception is that everyone will have their hands classified under the new system, instead of scrabbling around for a tape measure you will simply be able to stand in the shop ask the nearest person to run his hands over your breasts to provide the necessary accurate measurements.
There will then be a simple to use 487 page guide which will allow the necessary conversions to metric measurements.
lhk
Kat

22 Nov 2004

Quote by foxylady 123
I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

No need to get upset, coz I'll recognise them biggrin

. But I'm afraid this will involve an inspection :shock: :P

22 Nov 2004

wow, i need new undies....i'm off to get a good measuring!! lol. x

23 Nov 2004

Quote by KitKat
I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

Not quite, however, in order to promote equal trading standards accross the whole EU, the term 'cup' has been rationalised. A cup by definition can be held in one hand, therefore anything over a handful can no longer be referred to as a cup size.
Several commitees are currently considering an alternative nomencalture for those who cannot be contained within the current parameters.
The project is currently in the consultation phase, and any suggestions will be fully considered.
Hope this helpslhkKatBut surely this is dependant on the size of the hand? Iaam fortunate enough to know some very big hands!! Traditionally, a hand is held to be 4 inches, however, diversification with the EU has required that this over simplified measurment should be replaced with and altogether more practical system.
This will, of course, remove any need to actually measure breasts. The utterly brilliant conception is that everyone will have their hands classified under the new system, instead of scrabbling around for a tape measure you will simply be able to stand in the shop ask the nearest person to run his hands over your breasts to provide the necessary accurate measurements.
There will then be a simple to use 487 page guide which will allow the necessary conversions to metric measurements.
lhk
Kat
What a brilliant idea!! Im off to go bra shoping now, however I just know Im going to have to visit a lot of shop s and get measured in each!!
Just one question though Kit Kat how do I go on if I want to buy a bra orve the net? How do I get Cyber measured??

23 Nov 2004

Quote by northcoastboy
Breasts
All Cup sizes to remain as before
32" becomes 812mm A B C
34" becomes 863mm A B C D
36" becomes A B C D
38" becomes A B C D

Phil~
But... but... they seem to have left out the most important cup sizes (i.e.E and above)! silly

hwoar: *
* Note to those who may see fit to comment: This is the very first time I've ever used that particular emoticon!

23 Nov 2004

Quote by foxylady 123
I have a problem with the above, it would seem that the EU have abolished E cups!! does that mean i no longer exist?

Not quite, however, in order to promote equal trading standards accross the whole EU, the term 'cup' has been rationalised. A cup by definition can be held in one hand, therefore anything over a handful can no longer be referred to as a cup size.
Several commitees are currently considering an alternative nomencalture for those who cannot be contained within the current parameters.
The project is currently in the consultation phase, and any suggestions will be fully considered.
Hope this helpslhkKatBut surely this is dependant on the size of the hand? Iaam fortunate enough to know some very big hands!! Traditionally, a hand is held to be 4 inches, however, diversification with the EU has required that this over simplified measurment should be replaced with and altogether more practical system.
This will, of course, remove any need to actually measure breasts. The utterly brilliant conception is that everyone will have their hands classified under the new system, instead of scrabbling around for a tape measure you will simply be able to stand in the shop ask the nearest person to run his hands over your breasts to provide the necessary accurate measurements.
There will then be a simple to use 487 page guide which will allow the necessary conversions to metric measurements.
lhk
Kat
What a brilliant idea!! Im off to go bra shoping now, however I just know Im going to have to visit a lot of shop s and get measured in each!!
Just one question though Kit Kat how do I go on if I want to buy a bra orve the net? How do I get Cyber measured?? There is a measurement process involving keyboard input which seems to work very well. However, because of the remote nature of on line shopping, it is additionally important to remove all possible sources of discrepency while still maintaining the normal constraining parameters. Therefore, it is first necessary to remove all clothing which may affect the results. I.E outer garments such as trousers, skirts longer than 12 inches, all top clothing. Lingerie falls within normal constraining parameters and so stockings and suspenders should be retained.
Now, once correctly attired in aforementioned (but worth mentioning again) stockings, suspenders and optional skirt not longer than 12 inches, place your keyboard on a firm flat surface. Lean forward, keeping the legs straight and slightly parted, until the breasts are suspended over the keyboad. The nipples should be directly over the D and K keys on the keyboard. Slowly lower your breasts until the nipples gently contact the cold, hard surface of the keys. At this point, you may need a friend to help by standing behind you, and pushing against you with a firm, slow and smooth action. In order to provide a standard, you may wish this action to be repeated several times. Once you are satisfied that you have things exactly where you want them, remain motionless for a period of not less than 30 seconds.
At this point, the pattern of keys depressed, and the rate of repeat, will automatically be transmitted to the bra manufacturer, resulting in a perfectly fitting bra.
Now, want me to got through that again for you? :twisted:
lhk
Kat

23 Nov 2004

Sorry Reece must have been a typo redface

perhaps E cup and above are covered by different regulations :shock:
Phil

23 Nov 2004

Quote by KitKat
There is a measurement process involving keyboard input which seems to work very well. However, because of the remote nature of on line shopping, it is additionally important to remove all possible sources of discrepency while still maintaining the normal constraining parameters. Therefore, it is first necessary to remove all clothing which may affect the results. I.E outer garments such as trousers, skirts longer than 12 inches, all top clothing. Lingerie falls within normal constraining parameters and so stockings and suspenders should be retained.
Now, once correctly attired in aforementioned (but worth mentioning again) stockings, suspenders and optional skirt not longer than 12 inches, place your keyboard on a firm flat surface. Lean forward, keeping the legs straight and slightly parted, until the breasts are suspended over the keyboad. The nipples should be directly over the D and K keys on the keyboard. Slowly lower your breasts until the nipples gently contact the cold, hard surface of the keys. At this point, you may need a friend to help by standing behind you, and pushing against you with a firm, slow and smooth action. In order to provide a standard, you may wish this action to be repeated several times. Once you are satisfied that you have things exactly where you want them, remain motionless for a period of not less than 30 seconds.
At this point, the pattern of keys depressed, and the rate of repeat, will automatically be transmitted to the bra manufacturer, resulting in a perfectly fitting bra.
Now, want me to got through that again for you? :twisted:
lhk
Kat

Oh, it all sounds very complicated!! Would it be possible for someone to call round and demostrate the procedure in person, particularly the " firm, slow and smooth action."??
Im a bit worried my nipples might get stuck in the key board!!

24 Nov 2004

Quote by foxylady 123
Oh, it all sounds very complicated!! Would it be possible for someone to call round and demostrate the procedure in person, particularly the " firm, slow and smooth action."??
Im a bit worried my nipples might get stuck in the key board!!

:shock: What, no volunteers? :shock: Does everyone know something I don't. :confused2:
lhk
Kat

24 Nov 2004

I couldn't get my nips close enough to touch the D and K keys at the same time!