Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login

Mum......What`s a Dildo

last reply
17 replies
1.0k views
3 watchers
0 likes
I have noticed that not an insignificant few of the wunnerful people on here have children some of an enquiring age perhaps?. redface surprisedops:
Now being no prude, I get a little flustered when something on telly comes on before the watershed that needs shall we say er...explaining.....Like - Mum what`s a dildo/swinger/nipple clamp. :shock: :shock: How do you deal with this? confused: :?:
I have no children, but once & this is honest truth...I was with a luvverly couple, (who had three upstairs, playing) whilst mummy & daddy were playing downstairs, I was happily eating at the downstairs buffet, when a small face was seen squashed against the lounge door (which had glass panels....frosted...thank god).....with a little voice saying...."I want a glass of water....& what`s that man doing, daddy....."
:oops: :oops: .....answer...."Your mummy`s lost a contact lens and my friend from the Army (Me? Army :!: :!smile, is using special equipment to find it.....!!!. It made Sunday lunch the next day very interesting.....still I must have used my equipment well, as they asked me back on four occassions!!!.
Happy Times (that almost weren`t)......any other close calls... :oops:
I'd never ever play at home ... christ my kids are enough to embarass a nun without giving them a topic!!!! I don't think it's fair either.
As for questions ... the middle girl has asked me what a swinger is and I lied ROFL. I told her well you get swings in a playground and this site is a kind of grown ups playground so we're called swingers.
As for the toys ... mine are well locked away although we did have an interesting discussion recently after I left some bondage tape on the floor by my bed and then needed to seal a parcel a few days later "mummy has some purple tape by her bed"
There is little on early enough for our little darlings as they are in bed by thankfully.
Recently whilst the Lord was lying on a couch entwined with our female friend and the Lady was getting a very sensual back rub from her husband, one of the kids walked into the room redface
Thankfully the little treasure was sleep walking and remembered nothing of it the following day
We now plan to wedge the doors shut in future. wink
Our personal take is you tell them the truth when they ask questions - but only at a level they can accept/understand.
Our 3 year old son has a book called "Where willy went" all about where babies come from, he loves it.
He is also on first name terms with our "friend" Steve - even recognises his car and wants him to play with his toys. lol
To be honest .....................til theyre at least teenagers . Go out or get sitters .
.....and the the teenagers say....."My mate`s mum/aunty/dad....is a swinger.....disgusting don`t you think Mum?????, then what? redface surprisedops: :oops:
If youve brought them up as intelligent liberal and balanced kids , then at that age you can explain and let them have their own opinion . Unless of course youre ashamed of what you do , in which case you shouldnt do it at all .
Quote by Silk and Big G
If youve brought them up as intelligent liberal and balanced kids , then at that age you can explain and let them have their own opinion . Unless of course youre ashamed of what you do , in which case you shouldnt do it at all .

Yep, your right.... smile But have you told your mum???...Or is that another thread wink
Quote by GlisteningHelmet
I have no children, but once & this is honest truth...I was with a luvverly couple, (who had three upstairs, playing) whilst mummy & daddy were playing downstairs, I was happily eating at the downstairs buffet, when a small face was seen squashed against the lounge door (which had glass panels....frosted...thank god).....with a little voice saying...."I want a glass of water....& what`s that man doing, daddy....."

To be honest with you I think it is the height of irresponsibility to be partying at home with children about... Not normally critical but that is something I feel fairly strongly about... :censored:
Quote by WibblyWobbly
To be honest with you I think it is the height of irresponsibility to be partying at home with children about... Not normally critical but that is something I feel fairly strongly about... :censored:

What if you do not have access to a babysitter and therefore unable to play away from home????
We dont have anyone that can or will have our children, therefore this is our only option.... So what are we supposed to do then??
Guess what this is something I feel strongly about too..... You have to know the reasons for playing at home not condem them straight away....
Quote by WibblyWobbly
I have no children, but once & this is honest truth...I was with a luvverly couple, (who had three upstairs, playing) whilst mummy & daddy were playing downstairs, I was happily eating at the downstairs buffet, when a small face was seen squashed against the lounge door (which had glass panels....frosted...thank god).....with a little voice saying...."I want a glass of water....& what`s that man doing, daddy....."

To be honest with you I think it is the height of irresponsibility to be partying at home with children about... Not normally critical but that is something I feel fairly strongly about... :censored:
It only happened the once...the next 3 times we met, they were at their Nan`s for the night.......I think it was the couple`s first time.....as it was a bit uneasy to say the least.. redface
I'm not totally against people playing while kids are in the house, but I wouldn't play while my son was in the house basically cos he doesn't sleep very well and I would feel that he would wake up any minute rolleyes :roll: :roll: :roll: I rarely invite people round anyway, much preferring to go out to play, so the situation hasn't really arisen. When he's older I wouldn't have a problem with it, but I would NEVER invite strangers round while he was in however old he was, that just seems too risky.
I've been to play at other people's houses when there have been kids in the house. One night I was being "entertained" at a couple's house and their daughter (about 8 years old) kept shouting downstairs with a running commentary of what was on the ten o'clock news :shock: :shock: :shock: Needless to say we waited til the news had finished before we got up to anything naughty lol :lol: :lol:
I much prefer all kids to be miles away when swinging!!!!
We would love to be able to have a kid free playarea, but it just isn't possible...
Having said that our kids are well and truely asleep before anyone comes around and they sleep very soundly...
Only once have we had someone to stay over and that person showed the upmost respect for our family.... But then knowing him like we do it didn't come as a shock...
The question was asked , and we replied . Sometimes reasons arent the same a justifications . Never meant to judge anyone , its an opinion thats all .
i dont have a problem with people who i know and trust knowing where i live and all that... its more to do with the fact that i would not want people in my house whilst my little one was there as i could never bee 100 percent sure she was not going to wake up poorly, or need the toilet desperately.
i believe that it is HER home and would not like the thought of her potentially running into something that is innapropriate and may make her feel uncomfortable.
i likewise do not like the thought of her coming and climbing into my bed in the morning as she often does... with me knowing that i have not had time to change the sheets since the 4 person orgy 4 hours earlier.
i am also quite a loud and unrestrained person redface and so if i knew i had to whisper.. i would not enjoy it the same as i should.
for this reason i prefer to play away.. or only when grandparents are babysitting.
i would not critisise other people for doing things differently to myself though - i might just be parranoid lol... i assume everyone is aware of their own childs sleep patterns and liklyness to wake up during the night... so am sure they have weighed up the risks.
and after all .. what works for one person is not going to work for everyone else.
back to the origional question..... i believe that when your child asks you a question.. it means they are mature enough to have at least thought about it.. and so deserve some kind of truthfull answer.
i am not advocating that you sit them down and recite the text from the kama sutra.. but give them the basic facts about the topic they have raised, in a way that makes sense to them. again this is something that only the parent of the individual child can gauge.
redface surprisedops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops:
i had a visitor a couple of weeks ago, an old friend who i'd just reunited with after several years. We where busy gossiping when, bless evil my 2 year old he came wandering into the living room with my rabbit vibrator :oops: :oops: , talk about embarassing, he'd even switched it on and it was going hell bent at top speed.
Lesson
dont store your toys at low level, needless to say its now in the top of the wadrobe with my other toys rolleyes
Quote by GlisteningHelmet
redface surprisedops: .....answer...."Your mummy`s lost a contact lens and my friend from the Army (Me? Army :!: :!smile, is using special equipment to find it.....!!!. It made Sunday lunch the next day very interesting.....still I must have used my equipment well, as they asked me back on four occassions!!!.

That's a brilliant story, & I could not possibly have come up with such a first rate explanation.
Obviously everyone's circumstances are different, & I wouldn't criticise anyone for their particular choices, but I would not feel comfortable "playing" if their were children in the house at the same time.
As far as explaining things, I have the ultimate "get out of jail free" card, as I am an uncle & if my nephew asks something about the birds & the bees I can reply "ask your Mum/Dad"!! :shock: confused That's partly me being a coward, but also I am unlikely to be aware of how much they have told him about various things.