Drink
dance
flirt
simples!!!!!
Grrrr... Both seem to have unintentional negative views.
In (other) past socials, my attempt to be "social butterfly" have been misconstrued as "tart". Attempts to be non-pushy and laid back have been seen as "anti-socail", so really, Room-worker or Wallflower... do I really care?
I'll chat to those that wanna chat, and be non-pushy to those that wish me not to darken their door. ;)
And to those that want more than chat and room-glancing,... well xxx ;)
Saying that, will have to visit a Wigan Munch one of these days ;)
We tend to be a couple of wall flowers at Munches as we both find it hard to break the ice with people we don’t know yet. Have to say that the Wigan munch is a highlight of the year for us, and NWC and Jo make us feel really welcome. So if you spot our name badges, say hello, we don’t bite unless you ask us too. :twisted:
i reckon 80-90 % of folk that attend socials are from the chatrooms as opposed to here ..not sure about munches tho.. but then i reckon thats probably the same for the number of folk that participate 'much' in the forums anyway compared to the chatrooms.. so stands to reason..you dont need to be known in here ..but it can help if you need to be 'known' that you pop your self in the chatrooms from time to time..
anti-social malcontent.
(but I try)
lp
see above for the result of 'intervention'
anyway... we digress...
lp
Wall flower or room walker?
As a single male I have no choice in the matter. It's walk or die. Sounds simple doesn't it? In realality it's some thing else. It's damed hard work and scary too.
Been to two munches now, both at the same venue with the same host. Both times there was a difinate boundry between terrified newbies and seasoned players. The second time being much more noticeable as the players had arrived from their hotel and gave the impression that they were there to socialse together before returning to the hotel to play.
I tried to speak to some of the players I met in the chat room. 'Come and speak to us' one fem said ' we don't bite'. I did and was cut dead. Not good to say the least especially as the rest of the female memebers did the same. Did it say Leper on my namebadge? However I did speak to one of the male members of the group, and had an intresting conversation so not all was lost.
On the first visit I noticed name badges for newbies and enquired about this with my host. They simply attempted to stick a badge or two on me which failed and then abandoned me. My hopes of haveing some of what was said of munches in the forum about help and guidance was dashed on the rocks. I presume the hosts have never read this.
At no point during the two munches did I ever see a seasoned player approach and speak to any newbie. Due to this I feel forced into a position whereby I have little option but to 'bounce' people in order to meet them. I don't like it and if there is a better way then I would like to know. Felt I bounced Mikeandlucy, who wrote earlier in this thread, and would like to know how they felt about this.
I wonder who many new people to the scene and munches abandon their dreams of being part of this lifestyle due to apparant indifference towards them by seasoned players?
I attended a social elsewhere and had a great night and met a lot of people, so many my head spun. Why the differce you may wonder. Simple. A lovely lady spotted I was new, alone and a litle lost. She took it upon herself to take me by the hand, literally, and introduced me to members of the group. The group then knew who I was and spoke to me as we trailed our way through a number of pubs. I am still in contact with some members and learned a lot about the scene in their locality.
Seasoned players and munch hosts must be aware what it must be like when you are new to the lifestyle after all they were new once. I would like to see better interaction between seasoned players and newbies and think that there should be more hand holders at munches for newbies to help them get over the first and difficult hurdle of introdutions. Not every one is a sophisicated socialite.
To seasoned players I say 'Hold out a hand'
and to newbies 'hard as it is don't get disheartened, keep going. The longest journey starts with one step'