I agree that you need to be able to talk about this with your new guy, ultimately, if you stick with him and attempt to give up your lifestyle it will become a bigger and bigger problem for you - and even if resentment doesn't build, disappointment and regret will. Been there, done that - it ain't great.
However, I'd like to propose a slightly different approach, one that is slightly gentler and hopefully less risky in terms of hurting each other.
Sitting him down and talking it through all in one will be a lot for him to take in one go. It will leave both of you with little room for manoeuvre, negotiation or compromise. It might take a bit of time for him to get used to the idea, but he may react very badly and feel hurt and rejected.
If you introduce a bit of kink a little at a time he'll probably be an eager participant, you can build up to the full admission. I think that you'll find out very quickly whether he is open minded about such things in your relationship by doing it this way.
The swinging part is likely to be the most threatening to him so he needs to feel secure with you, and if you've built up the kink well so that he also becomes addicted to it you'll probably find you don't have too much of a problem with the final step.
Think of it like climbing the stairs, its easy one step at time, very difficult scaling a sheer cliff.
Thats how I would do it, but it may not be right for either you as an individual or as a couple.
Good luck and keep the faith.
SA
XXX
