My update on smacking children

11 Feb 2009

Quote by kentswingers777
I don't understand the distinction between an acceptable smack and unacceptable abuse.

I would say an acceptable smack is when all other feeling you have for a child are positives a children when sitting after would reflect on the positives and negatives and weigh up what has just happened.
abuse is when a children has very little positives from their parents to draw from.
This is how I see the difference, I don’t mean it as a form to justify my actions.
Minx you seem to be missing the most important point here......it is ILLEGAL to smack your kids, which leaves a mark. It is ILLEGAL to emotionally abuse your child.
That is the law, no matter what you or I say to the contrary. Try smacking your child in front of a social worker, and say that you are being positive.
They will have your child taken away quicker than you can say......ouch.
777 I think you are missing the point, we have to understand that people have different views for different reasons.
Ben asked a question and I believe we have an understanding in how we both would see things differently, what you keep doing is boxing people to fit left or right without listening to why and how opinions are form. I am not asking for people like ben to agree with me, but am just giving him a different view for a different reason.
The things about this country is nobody listens, to listen is to learn, I am just listening to ben at this moment.
Minx this is NOT about opinions.....it is about the law of the land. The law social workers act upon.
There is no right or wrong things here. On this occasion I am dealing with hard facts. Whatever your reasons or anybodys elses about smacking, it is illegal.
You have said you feel it is ok to smack your child, and I agree with you, it is just that the law will not.....and I should know, as am going through something very similar right now.
Kent I do hear what you are saying and I agree.
What we can't keep doing with law is to tarnish everyone with the same brush, I personally would like the law changed as I don't want it as a carrot for children to dangle over parents heads that are trying to do the best with their children. I don’t believe that one negative with some many positives within the family home should have their children removed because of the one negative, but to see the overall picture. but I can not change the law, but I would be happy to fight my case in the courts if it ever come to that.
All I am trying to do here is give people that possibly see things a certain way a balance on how I see it, the only way things get changed is if people have both side of an opinion to ponder over, then can form their own opinions based on a more informed choice.
Ben sorry to use you here but you have total different views as to myself, and I can totally respect and understand how your opinion has been formed, no opinion is right or wrong but if we can see how our own opinions are formed we might just see some common ground in the middle to agree on.
Unless people can see both sides we are all stuck in believing what it is we believe, nothing moves we all stay the same, ok I might be wasting my time here.
But do you know what I don't believe people are so stuck in their ways to always think themselves as being right.
I don't have the answers but if someone asks me a question I will answer it honestly, but I am not saying it is right. I let others form their own opinions.
So we agree on this one Kent we just go about it a different way.

11 Feb 2009

Ty Minx. I try not to fall out over opinions. I do get irritated by personal insults and labels.
Was it ever "legal" to hit a child? I've scoured all the law sites I can and consulted a solicitor friend and nothing I can find excuses assault etc simply because one is the childs parent.
"The philosophy of one century is the common sense of the next." - Henry Ward Beecher

11 Feb 2009

I'm fully behind minx. We listen too much to 'do gooders' in this country who are always sticking their noses into other peoples business. Lets have some common sense.
Theres a lady I know who took her child to school but was late due to the little one playing up. She told the teacher that she had to slap her hands. By the time she got home, social services were on her doorstep. Jesus wept. this country has gone mad. COMMON SENSE is whats needed.

12 Feb 2009

i have to admit i don't agree with hitting children, we all have our own opinions and this is just mine so i am in no way right but in return i'm not wrong either, but i have 3 children and can honestly say hand on heart i have never raised a had to any of my children, i love my children and the though of inflicting pysical pain on them is something i just can not do, now thats not me saying everyone who has hit their child does not love them as much as i love mine, im not that up my own arse lol i honestly think if i hit one of my kids it would hurt me more than it would them confused

i suppose we just all feel different and thats just how i feel about the subject smile

theres always alternative ways of getting thro to a child rather than smacking them, i usually take thing away from them that are important to them, like mobile phones which are every kids life line now days lol infact my middle daughter has said to me a few times when i have taken her phone off her as a punishment "can't you just hit me instead?" lol see to her one slap is better than a week without a phone so to me i'm hitting her where it hurts the most and thats the best way to get thro to them

12 Feb 2009

Quote by naughtynymphos1
i have to admit i don't agree with hitting children, we all have our own opinions and this is just mine so i am in no way right but in return i'm not wrong either, but i have 3 children and can honestly say hand on heart i have never raised a had to any of my children, i love my children and the though of inflicting pysical pain on them is something i just can not do, now thats not me saying everyone who has hit their child does not love them as much as i love mine, im not that up my own arse lol i honestly think if i hit one of my kids it would hurt me more than it would them i suppose we just all feel different and thats just how i feel about the subject theres always alternative ways of getting thro to a child rather than smacking them, i usually take thing away from them that are important to them, like mobile phones which are every kids life line now days lol infact my middle daughter has said to me a few times when i have taken her phone off her as a punishment "can't you just hit me instead?" lol see to her one slap is better than a week without a phone so to me i'm hitting her where it hurts the most and thats the best way to get thro to them

I feel exactly the way you do, it did hurt me more than it hurt my children, my two sons one 18 the other 12 I can only remember smacking, I am struggling here twice maybe I remember smacking my 18 when he was about 2 on the back of the hand because he threw a toy he was holding at a passing car and another time around the age of 8 for lighting paper in a bottle in his bedroom, these were sharp short shock treatments more through fear of what could of happened than anger.
My daughter is another case altogether, she had anger and I knew and could relate where that was coming from, children at school, I dealt with it through teachers, it was all silly comments that she took to heart, because it was from friends it hurt her, and caused her to become angry with us at home.
I could so totally relate to her and felt her pain, as I had the same when I was at school. But how do you deal with emotions at the same time supporting her at school, and having to try dealing with the anger, the only way I could get through to her was to try and get her to hear what we were all saying, we were listening but she when off on a mood couldn't see it and just pushed us, pushed the rules of the house, and all balance went out of the window.
It was at these times I knew the only way to calm her down was to smack, as it defused the situation, I didn’t feel good about it but felt there was no other choice.
Once all had calmed and she saw she had upset me, as I am not afraid to cry in front of my children and I apologised and cuddled her she saw it wasn’t something I wanted to do. We then had a calm base to talk and reason.
So no I am not proud of the fact I have smacked my children but I don't feel guilty either.
Luckily I have not had reason to smack any of my children for ages now, but I also feel very strongly about the government taking away the rights of parents like myself to remove it as a form of (I don't know what you want to call it, control some would say, punishment others,) I will let you make up your own minds.

12 Feb 2009

I would just like to add my two penn'orth and ask Kent when this illegal to smack children became law.
I have been led to believe that "reasonable chastisement" was the watchword. I was involved in incident with step children some three years ago and the police became involved due to a report being made by an absent father that was, I believe trying to score points over his ex. The police investigated this and informed all concerned that they would NOT be pressing charges and that "reasonable chastisement" could only be administered by the blood parents of any children and that step parents where not to administer punishment in any way considered to be abuse!
Anyway I digress. My belief is that there appears to be no common sense and/or freedom of choice in British society now!!

12 Feb 2009

Quote by benrums0n
Perhaps thats why im so against smacking cos i didnt have the positives as a kid.
There are two other things that make me ponder.
When do kids get too old to be smacked?
Does anyone smack their adult friends or adult family members?

I smacked my adult kid, who still lives with me, when she was 22, a smack on her face cheek, not a overly hard one, but not a soft one either.
It shocked her so much, bought here to her senses, and then we could carry on with verbal communication about the situation.
I did not apologise for smacking her, as I felt it was needed, she later thanked me for ALL I had done for her over the problem!
..........
As a child we were smacked by our Father, by a large hand that left marks for days, and were caned by him also, usually he did it under our mothers instructions.
He would work away most of the week, and then on his return, be told of what ever our Mother had deciced we had done wrong that week, and he would then attack us, even though the deemed wrong doing may of been done ages ago!
The day we hid the stick from him, was a very bad one.
That then, and now is totally unacceptable.
Lucys post.

12 Feb 2009

I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

12 Feb 2009

I did not read it either until earlier tonight.
Feel slightly uncomfortable about smacking my kids when I deemed it nessesary, but I am sure thats is as it is not allowed or seen as acceptable in todays world.
Also because it brings back old memorys.
Lucys post.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by kentswingers777
It is even worse now though with the baby P scandal. Social services are so scared of their own shadows now, that now if you get into the system, nobody or nothing will stand in their way, whether it is just or not.

Why do you think that is Kenty?
Maybe, just maybe because they know if they get another one wrong, The Wail, the Sun and it's ignorant, ill informed readership will once again break out the pitchforks and torches? There's an old saying Kenty, "You reap what you sow".
It's no good vilifying social workers for not doing their jobs on one hand whilst still vilifying them for doing their jobs is it?
Mind you, in your world, their all lefty liberal sandalista's, who probably deserve all they get, so it doesn't really matter, does it?
As for my take on smacking children. I see no harm in a light tap to the hand or the legs. Anything more is imho unecessary.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Cherrytree
I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

And I made the same mistake Cherry.
I spent yesterday updating my child protection training as I work with young people. It's haunted me all night.
My position is that there's no justification for any level of 'smacking'; please stop.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Luckylucky2007
I would just like to add my two penn'orth and ask Kent when this illegal to smack children became law.
I have been led to believe that "reasonable chastisement" was the watchword. I was involved in incident with step children some three years ago and the police became involved due to a report being made by an absent father that was, I believe trying to score points over his ex. The police investigated this and informed all concerned that they would NOT be pressing charges and that "reasonable chastisement" could only be administered by the blood parents of any children and that step parents where not to administer punishment in any way considered to be abuse!

Quite right. Kent's referring to the 2004 Children's Act which is reasonably clear. Smacking is NOT illegal, so long as it can be defined as reasonable chastisement administered by the biological parent like you say. It is only illegal if it leaves bruising, cuts, grazing or swelling. i.e. obvious physical injury that persists beyond that which would ordinarily be caused by an open-handed smack. At that point it quite rightly becomes an offence of Common Assault / Actual Bodily Harm.
Neil x x x ;)

13 Feb 2009

Quote by neilinleeds
I would just like to add my two penn'orth and ask Kent when this illegal to smack children became law.
I have been led to believe that "reasonable chastisement" was the watchword. I was involved in incident with step children some three years ago and the police became involved due to a report being made by an absent father that was, I believe trying to score points over his ex. The police investigated this and informed all concerned that they would NOT be pressing charges and that "reasonable chastisement" could only be administered by the blood parents of any children and that step parents where not to administer punishment in any way considered to be abuse!

Quite right. Kent's referring to the 2004 Children's Act which is reasonably clear. Smacking is NOT illegal, so long as it can be defined as reasonable chastisement administered by the biological parent like you say. It is only illegal if it leaves bruising, cuts, grazing or swelling. i.e. obvious physical injury that persists beyond that which would ordinarily be caused by an open-handed smack. At that point it quite rightly becomes an offence of Common Assault / Actual Bodily Harm.
Neil x x x ;)
Aha! so there you have it! :doh:
Since there are so few kids living with their biological parents these days as a result of parents trading partners, that explains why there is an increase in the number of kids complaining to child-line about assault.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by TheLovelyOne
I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

And I made the same mistake Cherry.
I spent yesterday updating my child protection training as I work with young people. It's haunted me all night.
My position is that there's no justification for any level of 'smacking'; please stop.
I would like to say, if me putting up this thread has in anyway upset people that was not my intent.
I can see why such an emotive topic could and perhaps there are some topics that should be left unsaid.
I have topics that have put me outside my comfort zone and have raised threads about them myself.
I only wanted to raise this topic again as to try and put across a somewhat balanced view of something I also don't agree with but have been honest that I have done and my reasons why.
If I have offended or caused upset in anyway I am truly sorry, and will thinking deeply in future on who my words might affect.
Please accept my apologises as it upsets me to think I may of upset others.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Theladyisaminx
I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

And I made the same mistake Cherry.
I spent yesterday updating my child protection training as I work with young people. It's haunted me all night.
My position is that there's no justification for any level of 'smacking'; please stop.
I would like to say, if me putting up this thread has in anyway upset people that was not my intent.
I can see why such an emotive topic could and perhaps there are some topics that should be left unsaid.
I have topics that have put me outside my comfort zone and have raised threads about them myself.
I only wanted to raise this topic again as to try and put across a somewhat balanced view of something I also don't agree with but have been honest that I have done and my reasons why.
If I have offended or caused upset in anyway I am truly sorry, and will thinking deeply in future on who my words might affect.
Please accept my apologises as it upsets me to think I may of upset others.
The poet John Lydgate is accredited with the saying "you can please some of the people some of the time..." but Abraham Lincoln made it famous.
Minxy, please don't ever not create a thread or contribute because you worry what people might think of you or because you don't want to upset people.
I can't think of one thread you have started or any contribution you have made that has made me feel was designed to offend; quite the contrary!
I really don't think either poster in the quotes captured above were being in any way critical of you!

13 Feb 2009

Totally agree with Gnv there Minxy.
The post is a good one.
It made uncomfortable thoughts in my mind due to the way I was raised, but the thought were there anyway.
I found when I did click on the post, after avoiding it for a few days, the comments typed by all, to be good and thought provoking at times, I loved to hear other peoples opinions on such a subject.
Its our own free will to click on a post, or to contribute to it!!
Lucys post

13 Feb 2009

Quote by GnV
I really don't think either poster in the quotes captured above were being in any way critical of you!

It's a brave human being indeed who speaks for me, but in this case you are absolutely right!! biggrin

Minxy, no criticism whatsoever intended. Don't change kiss

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Theladyisaminx
I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

And I made the same mistake Cherry.
I spent yesterday updating my child protection training as I work with young people. It's haunted me all night.
My position is that there's no justification for any level of 'smacking'; please stop.
I would like to say, if me putting up this thread has in anyway upset people that was not my intent.
I can see why such an emotive topic could and perhaps there are some topics that should be left unsaid.
I have topics that have put me outside my comfort zone and have raised threads about them myself.
I only wanted to raise this topic again as to try and put across a somewhat balanced view of something I also don't agree with but have been honest that I have done and my reasons why.
If I have offended or caused upset in anyway I am truly sorry, and will thinking deeply in future on who my words might affect.
Please accept my apologises as it upsets me to think I may of upset others.
I admit I've smacked my kids when they were small. People have often said to me, don't smack in the heat of the moment, but that's the only times I have smacked. I couldn't do smack as punishment after the heat has died down. I've never smacked to hurt, more to shock and stop something.
I've smacked when I've wanted to stop my daughters from doing something, or if they're out of control. I've smacked to say STOP, and shouted that to them too. To me, it's kind of been a shock tactic, one firm word, one tap to stop an action...... then talk about things calmly and slower. More often, if they weren't in danger, I've let them calm down on their own before 'the chat'. Certainly I wouldn't let a child go into danger, doing nothing apart from trying to talk nicely to them until they decide not to do whatever, I've halted the situation.
I remember my parents smacking, they also didn't do it very often, and as you get older, it happens less and less, just the raised hand stopped me in my tracks lol

Would I smack an adult in the same manner, or have an adult smack me in the same manner. If I was in danger, or socially out of control, I don't think it would get to the 'smack' point. As an adult, I've learnt a lot more about body language. If someone raised their hand and shouted STOP, I would come to a halt quicker than a halt at the national halting championships.
Now my kids are older, they've also learned body language. If someone was issuing a serious warning, I hope they would act instantly, rather than ignoring or carrying on until a good reason has been given.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by GnV
I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

And I made the same mistake Cherry.
I spent yesterday updating my child protection training as I work with young people. It's haunted me all night.
My position is that there's no justification for any level of 'smacking'; please stop.
I would like to say, if me putting up this thread has in anyway upset people that was not my intent.
I can see why such an emotive topic could and perhaps there are some topics that should be left unsaid.
I have topics that have put me outside my comfort zone and have raised threads about them myself.
I only wanted to raise this topic again as to try and put across a somewhat balanced view of something I also don't agree with but have been honest that I have done and my reasons why.
If I have offended or caused upset in anyway I am truly sorry, and will thinking deeply in future on who my words might affect.
Please accept my apologises as it upsets me to think I may of upset others.
The poet John Lydgate is accredited with the saying "you can please some of the people some of the time..." but Abraham Lincoln made it famous.
Minxy, please don't ever not create a thread or contribute because you worry what people might think of you or because you don't want to upset people.
I can't think of one thread you have started or any contribution you have made that has made me feel was designed to offend; quite the contrary!
I really don't think either poster in the quotes captured above were being in any way critical of you!
Gnv I didn’t take them in no way as a critisim that wasn’t my meaning it is a different feeling within me and it isn’t about me but what I could say to that make other feel uncomfortable.
Maybe I worry and feel too much, I don’t know.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Theladyisaminx
Gnv I didn’t take them in no way as a critisim that wasn’t my meaning it is a different feeling within me and it isn’t about me but what I could say to that make other feel uncomfortable.
Maybe I worry and feel too much, I don’t know.

Don't change! kiss

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Theladyisaminx
I really shouldn't read these threads, I really shouldn't. But I can't help it. Maybe someone with deeper self-knowledge than I have can explain why I do, when it leaves me feeling like it does for so long afterwards.
That's all.

And I made the same mistake Cherry.
I spent yesterday updating my child protection training as I work with young people. It's haunted me all night.
My position is that there's no justification for any level of 'smacking'; please stop.
I would like to say, if me putting up this thread has in anyway upset people that was not my intent.
I can see why such an emotive topic could and perhaps there are some topics that should be left unsaid.
I have topics that have put me outside my comfort zone and have raised threads about them myself.
I only wanted to raise this topic again as to try and put across a somewhat balanced view of something I also don't agree with but have been honest that I have done and my reasons why.
If I have offended or caused upset in anyway I am truly sorry, and will thinking deeply in future on who my words might affect.
Please accept my apologises as it upsets me to think I may of upset others.
No no no no no no no no no.....NO!
No you haven't upset, offended or anything me, Minxy. :thumbup:

13 Feb 2009

This is such a hard subject for me to talk about. I dont know where to start apart from smacking is different to a beating. I dont agrea with smacking or beating a child. I did smack my child a couple of times but I found that there are other ways of coping with my childrens occasional bad behavior, for example, the naughty chair, explaning things to them and taking things of my children as a punnishmet and it did work. My children are now in their 20s now and are decent poeple.
I got a lot of beatings from my mam with pokers belts and more and then my dad would join in with his hand. This happen to me from as young as 2 from what I can remember, the beatings happend to me for no reason I did not have to do any thing wrong. I learned from my mam and dads mistakes But some poeple do not. My friend and her hubby was very violent with her children and they have become violent poeple.
Whatever poeple do to tell there children off it should be consistant if they do something wrong they should be punnished and not get away with it and hopefully the child will learn from it. hopefully temper should never come into it but no ones perfect, im not perfect.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Nicekat
This is such a hard subject for me to talk about. I dont know where to start apart from smacking is different to a beating. I dont agrea with smacking or beating a child. I did smack my child a couple of times but I found that there are other ways of coping with my childrens occasional bad behavior, for example, the naughty chair, explaning things to them and taking things of my children as a punnishmet and it did work. My children are now in their 20s now and are decent poeple.
I got a lot of beatings from my mam with pokers belts and more and then my dad would join in with his hand. This happen to me from as young as 2 from what I can remember, the beatings happend to me for no reason I did not have to do any thing wrong. I learned from my mam and dads mistakes But some poeple do not. My friend and her hubby was very violent with her children and they have become violent poeple.
Whatever poeple do to tell there children off it should be consistant if they do something wrong they should be punnished and not get away with it and hopefully the child will learn from it. hopefully temper should never come into it but no ones perfect, im not perfect.

I don't know if I am stepping out of line here it is not my intent, I do believe no children should ever be beaten with any object and that is where all children should be protected. No child deserves a beating for any reason and the parents should be held accountable.
I am not a perfect parent as you are not what we are both trying to do is raise our children the best way we can we are not given a guide book the day they are born. It seems to me you know whats right and wrong and you are a good parent and a damn site more perfect than a lot out there.
Good luck xxx

13 Feb 2009

Quote by neilinleeds
I would just like to add my two penn'orth and ask Kent when this illegal to smack children became law.
I have been led to believe that "reasonable chastisement" was the watchword. I was involved in incident with step children some three years ago and the police became involved due to a report being made by an absent father that was, I believe trying to score points over his ex. The police investigated this and informed all concerned that they would NOT be pressing charges and that "reasonable chastisement" could only be administered by the blood parents of any children and that step parents where not to administer punishment in any way considered to be abuse!

Quite right. Kent's referring to the 2004 Children's Act which is reasonably clear. Smacking is NOT illegal, so long as it can be defined as reasonable chastisement administered by the biological parent like you say. It is only illegal if it leaves bruising, cuts, grazing or swelling. i.e. obvious physical injury that persists beyond that which would ordinarily be caused by an open-handed smack. At that point it quite rightly becomes an offence of Common Assault / Actual Bodily Harm.
Neil x x x ;)
Thanks Neil, I thought at the very least most would have heard of that act. It has been talked about enough.
So in reality you can only smack a child that leaves no marks....thats like hitting a burglar with a pillow? dunno

13 Feb 2009

Quote by staffcple

It is even worse now though with the baby P scandal. Social services are so scared of their own shadows now, that now if you get into the system, nobody or nothing will stand in their way, whether it is just or not.

Why do you think that is Kenty?
Maybe, just maybe because they know if they get another one wrong, The Wail, the Sun and it's ignorant, ill informed readership will once again break out the pitchforks and torches? There's an old saying Kenty, "You reap what you sow".
It's no good vilifying social workers for not doing their jobs on one hand whilst still vilifying them for doing their jobs is it?
Mind you, in your world, their all lefty liberal sandalista's, who probably deserve all they get, so it doesn't really matter, does it?
As for my take on smacking children. I see no harm in a light tap to the hand or the legs. Anything more is imho unecessary.
Of course it matters!!
I understand that most do a great job, and have said so many times before. cool

13 Feb 2009

sandalista's
I like that!
lp

13 Feb 2009

Quote by kentswingers777
I would just like to add my two penn'orth and ask Kent when this illegal to smack children became law.
I have been led to believe that "reasonable chastisement" was the watchword. I was involved in incident with step children some three years ago and the police became involved due to a report being made by an absent father that was, I believe trying to score points over his ex. The police investigated this and informed all concerned that they would NOT be pressing charges and that "reasonable chastisement" could only be administered by the blood parents of any children and that step parents where not to administer punishment in any way considered to be abuse!

Quite right. Kent's referring to the 2004 Children's Act which is reasonably clear. Smacking is NOT illegal, so long as it can be defined as reasonable chastisement administered by the biological parent like you say. It is only illegal if it leaves bruising, cuts, grazing or swelling. i.e. obvious physical injury that persists beyond that which would ordinarily be caused by an open-handed smack. At that point it quite rightly becomes an offence of Common Assault / Actual Bodily Harm.
Neil x x x ;)
Thanks Neil, I thought at the very least most would have heard of that act. It has been talked about enough.
So in reality you can only smack a child that leaves no marks....thats like hitting a burglar with a pillow? dunno

Not a lot of people know about it that's why. The 2004 Children Act was a Green Paper, a addendum if you like to the Children's Act 1989. It's a piece of legislation which is a framework that provides a grounding to 'Every Child Matters' and was brought about from the Victoria Climbie case.
The main act of Children's Law remains The Children's Act 1989 with the 2004 Act placing new duties on Local Authorities.
Has it worked and served it's purpose yet?, No. Baby P is prime example not to mention the unmentioned children sad

13 Feb 2009

Sorry Mar. I just " presumed " that if people were going to reply on a topic, they would know what the law says.
That is why I kept on saying about it being, against the law.

13 Feb 2009

Quote by Theladyisaminx
This is such a hard subject for me to talk about. I dont know where to start apart from smacking is different to a beating. I dont agrea with smacking or beating a child. I did smack my child a couple of times but I found that there are other ways of coping with my childrens occasional bad behavior, for example, the naughty chair, explaning things to them and taking things of my children as a punnishmet and it did work. My children are now in their 20s now and are decent poeple.
I got a lot of beatings from my mam with pokers belts and more and then my dad would join in with his hand. This happen to me from as young as 2 from what I can remember, the beatings happend to me for no reason I did not have to do any thing wrong. I learned from my mam and dads mistakes But some poeple do not. My friend and her hubby was very violent with her children and they have become violent poeple.
Whatever poeple do to tell there children off it should be consistant if they do something wrong they should be punnished and not get away with it and hopefully the child will learn from it. hopefully temper should never come into it but no ones perfect, im not perfect.

I don't know if I am stepping out of line here it is not my intent, I do believe no children should ever be beaten with any object and that is where all children should be protected. No child deserves a beating for any reason and the parents should be held accountable.
I am not a perfect parent as you are not what we are both trying to do is raise our children the best way we can we are not given a guide book the day they are born. It seems to me you know whats right and wrong and you are a good parent and a damn site more perfect than a lot out there.
Good luck xxx
Thanks for the compliment, im not good at taking compliments. redface

You are the same as me and you did and do your best at rasing your children, all you can do is you best and like you said no 1 is perfect, im not. smile

Sorry for repeating myself.

14 Feb 2009

Quote by Nicekat
This is such a hard subject for me to talk about. I dont know where to start apart from smacking is different to a beating. I dont agrea with smacking or beating a child. I did smack my child a couple of times but I found that there are other ways of coping with my childrens occasional bad behavior, for example, the naughty chair, explaning things to them and taking things of my children as a punnishmet and it did work. My children are now in their 20s now and are decent poeple.
I got a lot of beatings from my mam with pokers belts and more and then my dad would join in with his hand. This happen to me from as young as 2 from what I can remember, the beatings happend to me for no reason I did not have to do any thing wrong. I learned from my mam and dads mistakes But some poeple do not. My friend and her hubby was very violent with her children and they have become violent poeple.
Whatever poeple do to tell there children off it should be consistant if they do something wrong they should be punnished and not get away with it and hopefully the child will learn from it. hopefully temper should never come into it but no ones perfect, im not perfect.

I don't know if I am stepping out of line here it is not my intent, I do believe no children should ever be beaten with any object and that is where all children should be protected. No child deserves a beating for any reason and the parents should be held accountable.
I am not a perfect parent as you are not what we are both trying to do is raise our children the best way we can we are not given a guide book the day they are born. It seems to me you know whats right and wrong and you are a good parent and a damn site more perfect than a lot out there.
Good luck xxx
Thanks for the compliment, im not good at taking compliments. redface

You are the same as me and you did and do your best at rasing your children, all you can do is you best and like you said no 1 is perfect, im not. smile

Sorry for repeating myself.
your welcome Take the compliment and wear it proud. xxx