Never realised you were quite so depraved...

25 May 2008

Never realised you were quite so depraved...

Just been talking to a friend via pm, and they put the above line in the pm (hopefully it was said with a big smile on their face) but it got me thinking.
Do you mind if other people (and I mean site members, not your neighbours or boss etc) know just what you get up to? Or, are you a little embarassed if someone knows just how naughty you have been.
For some odd reason I feel really embarrassed if people know what we/I have been up to. I started thinking about this after reading Srne's post the other week - the one on role play etc - and wondered why I am so bothered when we are all (most of us) are here for the same thing. I also think that this actually stops me from just going ahead and doing what I want to do. Maybe the upbringing is telling me that 'nice girls' dont do things like this (yeah, ok, maybe I dont fit into the 'nice' box, but you get the point).
Is it just me, or do others sometimes feel this way.

25 May 2008

well so far, I am an :angel: But yes, Id be a little mortified if a depraved urge suddenly got the better of me and I was found out
In edit...Site members only? No, actually I dont think Id mind that much lol

after all, we are all adults here for pretty much the same thing. Providing it was kept between me and whoever the depravity was taking place with, then I would be ok. I would however, be pretty annoyed if someone wasnt as discreet as they should be and others got to know about our activities.
Waiting for lots of depravity to decend on me]

25 May 2008

Very sad, cause Im replying to myself now, but Im not embarrassed to be a swinger, Im more embarrassed by people knowing how much or how little I actually do get involved.
Does this make sense or am I really losing the plot and become even more depraved than I thought :shock:

25 May 2008

in here, sometimes I do......and if i feel a tad embarrassed thats when the blushing smilies come in handy!!
in real life....there wouldnt be a blushing smily big enough to cover my embarrasment if anyone found out some of the stuff i have goten up to!!
mrs NWC...im intrigued as to what prompted that comment........walk this way <<<<<<<<<< to my inbox and DO tell all lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: and I might share with you what I did the other night wink

::lol:

25 May 2008

Quote by Bonedigger
mrs NWC...im intrigued as to what prompted that comment........walk this way <<<<<<<<<< to my inbox and DO tell all :lol: :lol: :lol: and I might share with you what I did the other night ::lol:

nothing very pervy started it, but it really got me thinking about much I do or dont give away to people and why I am actually embarrased to give away details, and it isnt the privacy thing, its downright embarrassement.

25 May 2008

I get embarrased really easily- but only in certain circumstances.
When I was asking another SH lady if she'd help get me into my corset at camp- and I revealed that I had to do it up first then put my boobs in- we both cringed with embarassment at the thought of her seeing my boobs.
Right pair we make rotflmao

25 May 2008

No your not alone and its a good question you have raised.
For us, we prefer NOT to let other people know much about what we get upto and generally keep it to ourselves!
It's just that we want to keep what we do between us (and obviously the people with whom we do it with, as we sort of dont like telling people what we get up to.
Whether this is an embarrassment thing, or just that we are relatively private people, i'm not sure.
Like NWC said, we are not ashamed to be swingers we just dont want to go around (even to people within the scene) telling them about what we have gotten up to.
When we talk to some of the people we have gotten to know through the site, they seem not so worried and tell us what and who they have been involved in, and when we are asked we always say "We aren't sure if the other people would be happy with us discussing private stuff so we better not go into it" which kind of gets us off the hook! lol

So, in answer to that, as the great singer songwriter Micheal Jackson once said......"you are not alone, We are here with u......" haha!

25 May 2008

Quote by de_sade
Then again anyone who imagines something really unspeakable being perpetrated by me to them...PM me, because I think I like the way you are thinking...

:twisted: pm on its way, :wink:

Quote by winchwench
I get embarrased really easily- but only in certain circumstances.
When I was asking another SH lady if she'd help get me into my corset at camp- and I revealed that I had to do it up first then put my boobs in- we both cringed with embarassment at the thought of her seeing my boobs.
Right pair we make

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

Quote by Srne
For us, we prefer NOT to let other people know much about what we get upto and generally keep it to ourselves!
It's just that we want to keep what we do between us (and obviously the people with whom we do it with, as we sort of dont like telling people what we get up to.
Whether this is an embarrassment thing, or just that we are relatively private people, i'm not sure.

The privacy thing is a really good point and it was originally your last post which got me thinking about this.
Sometimes though, this actually stops me from doing things I want to do. For example, if I was to do a post or an ad, I would be hoping that no one I actually knew saw them incase they were shocked. Is that mad?
There are one or two things (fairly naughty things) that I really, really want to do, but being worried about what others will think is actually stoping me arranging it. Its not so much a privacy thing, more of a 'what will they think of me' thing.
Now I know Im going daft :P I just need some bravery pills.

25 May 2008

I am totally private. I have no interest in having sex with anyone who talks openly with specific details of things they have done with anything identifiable about the person they have done it with.
Every sexual reference to wor lass I have done with her permission. Otherwise I keep details general and non-identifiable. I appreciate the same things from the people I have sex with. What about discussing sexual practices... eg 'I had splendid the other night and she has this habit of snorting when she cums' etc. It is just 'icky' for want of a better phrase. I am private about what exactly I do with specific people. I am happy to talk about what I do generally.
I would hate to think that those who know that I love fucking a guy up the arse would automatically assume that I do that with every man. (mores the pity rolleyes

)
It is just respect for the people I have sex with. I don't particularly care what others think about me. I am a long way beyond that. I am unsure whether I could actually shock anyone close to me anyway and anyone else??? nah.. it isn't an issue. lol

25 May 2008

I dont think your silly NWC Both J and I cringe in the chatroom if we see people being really loud about what and with who they got up to stuff with. There is the Mail system and the whisper system for that (in our case). It can be tantamount to showing off sometimes done in open chat I think. Its one thing to chat and laugh about stuff in the third person sense but to be really personal about ones own getting up to's nah! thats for other places and times.

25 May 2008

Personally I'd take depraved as a compliment!! :twisted:
But no, I agree with what has been said about privacy and discretion. What I do and with whom is a matter for me only as far as I'm concerned. I don't have to brag about it, so why should anyone else?

26 May 2008

Stormy and I don't do anything :angel: so we don't get embarrassed smile

26 May 2008

If on the one hand one wants to live up the 'lifestyle' with those you are comfy with, but also don't want conventionalists to 'get the wrong idea about you', and therefore hold back accordingly; then one might come away from the adventure with little or no experience.

26 May 2008

For some people talking about what they've got up to is a turn on and that's fine I guess. Talking about who you got up to it with however, isn't fine in my opinion. If you don't like people knowing what you do then it's important that you can rely on your playmate's discretion.
A general chat about things you like, or think you would like, is perhaps a better way of setting the 'rules' when playing, or deciding if you want to play, with someone new. It's less cold that just asking for a list of do's and don'ts and gives you a better idea of the person/people and how they like to play.

26 May 2008

Strangley I'm far more at ease with complete strangers knowing how depraved I am than people I know socially. Which makes swinging difficult rolleyes

H.x

26 May 2008

S'alright H! we know how depraved you are and we still luv ya lol

After all you watch football and stuff ffs rolleyes

26 May 2008

Quote by de_sade
Despite my open invitation to inform me of any / all depraved thoughts I have not had a single PM...

Sorry, Ive been busy gardening all day, but will give you the graphic details later wink

Quote by H-x
Strangley I'm far more at ease with complete strangers knowing how depraved I am than people I know socially. Which makes swinging difficult
H.x

This is exactly what I was trying to say in the waffle above. Strangers, and to point, the neighbours, I really am not worried what they think but what do I do if any of my on line social mates find out what Im doing. What will they think? redface

The privacy thing mentioned above is important, but more importantly, is that I would be embarrassed if my 'Munch/Social/On-line' mates found out that I was in fact sexually active (shock, horror, they will probably know now), and this stops me from doing things I really would like to do. Mad or what?

26 May 2008

Quote by firelizard
Stormy and I don't do anything :angel: so we don't get embarrassed

So, wanna see my boobs then? dunno

26 May 2008

:shock: winchy how RUDE!!!!!
LOL only kidding lol

Surely depravity is in the eye of the beholder??
I mean whats depraved, odd or freakishly weird to one may not be so to someone else.
For instance, TV's and guys who dress in womens underwear does zippo for me......but others will find it really horny and a huge turn on......some people might think I'm depraved for enjoying bukakke, or posting pornographic pix of myself on the net...whereas to me its a huge buzz.....
The thing is, as long as you are enjoying it, AND the person your doing it with enjoys it too....whats depraved about that??
Spread the happiness in any way possible is what I say :inlove:
(besides I cant remember all my half hour, late night quickies to be able to divulge stuff about them, even if I wanted too wink

)

26 May 2008

Quote by Bonedigger
The thing is, as long as you are enjoying it, AND the person your doing it with enjoys it too....whats depraved about that??

I don't think it's about who thinks what is depraved. As an example, if I went to a fetish club and had some things done to me that some might consider.....outlandish.......I'd have no problem at all with the people there (who I don't know) watching because I have no relationship with them.
But if I went to the same club and there were people there that I'd socialised with I may not be able to do the same because it might change their perception of our relationship. It's not that I don't want them to know, it's just me knowing that they know would change things, maybe.
Does that make any sense or should I start taking more water with it? biggrin

S'alright H! we know how depraved you are and we still luv ya
After all you watch football and stuff ffs

Ssshhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Don't tell everyone.
H.x

27 May 2008

Quote by de_sade
Glad I read you correctly too :rascal:

But that got me thinking of something else, but I will leave that thread for another day when Im not feeling quite so depraved wink

27 May 2008

personally; i tell everyone.. well almost; brothers sister.. mates... i don't think it's a problem people knowing what you do, or who with, as long as they don't see you do it? well ordinary ppl anyway,
Theres a certain ego boost with blokes anyway i think,
but in saying this, one thing i NEVER do is kiss and tell, so saying.."i go and do X" is ok but "i go and do X with mrs or miss Y" is a no no.

27 May 2008

if you tell folk your big headed and bragging if you dont tell folk then you obviously dont play , cant get over the number of times folk have said they are scared of me and rose....lol along with the people here that really know what we are like.. yet the rumour mill trundles along...so as far as im concerned folk talk anyway...if they dont have the facts they make them up...im sure according to some we are very depraved and others the biggest softies on the site... doesnt worry us one bit..
wrats

27 May 2008

Is it because those not in the know see swinger and think "crocodiles" they're gunna eat us?
lol

28 May 2008

I know exactly what you mean... I'm a churchgoer.. and if some of them there knew what I was up to I don't know what I would do!!!!

Quote by H-x
Strangley I'm far more at ease with complete strangers knowing how depraved I am than people I know socially. Which makes swinging difficult
H.x

28 May 2008

Quote by splendid_
I am totally private. I have no interest in having sex with anyone who talks openly with specific details of things they have done with anything identifiable about the person they have done it with.
Every sexual reference to wor lass I have done with her permission. Otherwise I keep details general and non-identifiable. I appreciate the same things from the people I have sex with. What about discussing sexual practices... eg 'I had splendid the other night and she has this habit of snorting when she cums' etc. It is just 'icky' for want of a better phrase. I am private about what exactly I do with specific people. I am happy to talk about what I do generally.
I would hate to think that those who know that I love fucking a guy up the arse would automatically assume that I do that with every man. (mores the pity )
It is just respect for the people I have sex with. I don't particularly care what others think about me. I am a long way beyond that. I am unsure whether I could actually shock anyone close to me anyway and anyone else??? nah.. it isn't an issue.

I have the same views as Splendid on this subject. What I do, how I do it, why I do it and who I do it with are totally private.
I do not have exhibitionism marked on my profile as Im not an exhibitionist.
I enjoy various practices within S & M and also have a taste for bondage :shock: but what these are.......well you will have to just come round and find out :twisted:
On a serious note though, one persons depravity is anothers normality...........so different strokes for different folks I suppose.
Like Lost, I also detest those who are less than discrete and it has made me change a decision about meeting someone through what I read a little while ago.
But as for depravity.........I would like seconds please!!