Mal...
If it help you here is another one for the gallery...done last night....
A bit more my style aka tights but NOT fishnets!
sorry!
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no less than he deserves!
Sex God
ok..... i have to decide if mal has passed his task or not... technically he has given me the right amount... albiet some of them were NOT put on here as requested.. but emailed to me.
however.. though it was before i awoke... it was NOT before the midnight deadline!
i dont want to appear to be harsh
so i will leave it upto you to decide....... if someone.. and by that i mean someone who has no involvement in the 3 pics.. can name the owners of each of these arses..... mal can pass!
:twisted:
arse 1
this one should "not be hard" to get!
however.. though it was before i awoke... it was NOT before the midnight deadline!
i dont want to appear to be harsh
so i will leave it upto you to decide....... if someone.. and by that i mean someone who has no involvement in the 3 pics.. can name the owners of each of these arses..... mal can pass!:twisted:
arse 1
this one should "not be hard" to get!
Sex God
girls..... dont EVER let it be said that i dont share! 
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Sex God
lol well done.. ... await mals task.. day two! 
Sex God
day two
The task you were set,
Was perfectly fair
All you had to do
Was find bums to share
You kept us all guessing
Would u pass or fail
It was really so close
Thank god for email
But hooray! pass you did
by the skin of your tongue
so task number two…..
is to write us a song!
It can have many verses
But no less than ten
And if u make a mistake
U wont be let off again!
But now listen closely
Here is the twist
Its about forum members
You must get the gist.
I know this might be hard
And I am not an evil cow
So to make it less stressful..
U have 24 hours- Starting NOW!!!
The task you were set,
Was perfectly fair
All you had to do
Was find bums to share
You kept us all guessing
Would u pass or fail
It was really so close
Thank god for email
But hooray! pass you did
by the skin of your tongue
so task number two…..
is to write us a song!
It can have many verses
But no less than ten
And if u make a mistake
U wont be let off again!
But now listen closely
Here is the twist
Its about forum members
You must get the gist.
I know this might be hard
And I am not an evil cow
So to make it less stressful..
U have 24 hours- Starting NOW!!!
Sex God
FFS !!! your barking
:rotflmao: :rotflmao:
WBB this is superb.
go Mal !! go
:rotflmao: :rotflmao:WBB this is superb.
go Mal !! go
Sex God
WBB! 
8-) 8-) I think you must be the mastermind behind this year's evil Big Brother!
Go Mal! :lol: :lol: :lol:
I hope nettle rash isn't going to be mentioned in your song
8-) 8-) I think you must be the mastermind behind this year's evil Big Brother! Go Mal!
:lol: :lol: :lol: I hope nettle rash isn't going to be mentioned in your song
Sex God
You're on your own mate. :shock: :shock: :shock:
Showing me arse is one thing, but songwriting is something else entirely.
Good luck mate, you're going to need it. :beer:
Showing me arse is one thing, but songwriting is something else entirely.
Good luck mate, you're going to need it. :beer:
Is there anybody there :shock: ?
No? Excellent!!! Now I can sneek in, publish and be damned!!
Tales From Swinging Heaven
Whingers, Morons, moaners and whiners
They brighten our day with their posts and one liners
In the chat room they tell the mods they know the rules
But don't listen when told that they are just fools
Then they come in the forum and tell all the rest
But usually get told that to leave would be best
But without them we wouldn't have so much fun
And our days would be duller and much more humdrum
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
They all love Mal, they thinks he's just a mod
But those of them in the know recognise he's a God
Well_Busty_Babe has set him this task
But when Mal needed help he just had to ask
The guys rallied round, and wrote a verse or two
And showed Busty Babe just what they could do
The guys know that when you want a good pal
There's none better than good Honest Mal
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
The lady we all know and love, little Venus
Who seems very obsessed by a thing called the penis
The kids take up space and are under her feet
And she finds it a pain when arranging a meet.
Her photos are gorgeous although a bit blurry
And not easy to tell if she's short haired or furry
But Venus remember you've heard people say
A Mars a day keeps the doctor away!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
One speaks with wisdom, and I think you'll all see
That the guy we all listen to, is JudyTV
His posts are always full of good solid thought
And we read with intent and know we've been taught
To accept men we see in dresses and skirts
That maybe they're different and terrible flirts
But on here we're open minded and have to agree
That the world would be worse without JudyTV
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
The Facilitator is fairly new to the scene
But he's settling in well and seems very keen
When you see him in the forum he'd welcome a wave
And is looking for help on how to behave
But what's in a name LC says Borg off the telly
And Phil_osopher, a type of KY jelly
But Fac is a teacher and with furrowed brow
Answers the questions of what, where and how.
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Mark, Oh Mark, the man at the top
When he says jump, he doesn't mean hop
When you get things wrong he will give you a fright
By sending a message to 'please put it right'
He is very fair though and doesn't like fools
Who totally ignore the well written rules
So next time your post is taking a knock
Beware bossman Mark, 'cos he'll give it the lock!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
One of our favourites is beautiful Vix
She looks bloody gorgeous in those wonderful pics
They've been seen for a while by the bikers of Britain
And the members of SH are totally smitten
She lives very quietly in the land of the Tor
And the locals cannot believe what they saw
When they opened the Sport and spotted the piece
And joined in the chorus 'You lucky sod Reese'
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
And then there's the Sarge, who's always a laugh
His posts are so witty, and sometimes so naff
Don't know where he gets those wonderful gifs
But maybe they started as jpegs or tiffs
His post about planning for a terrorist attack
Made us all think about covering our back
If we do get attacked then we'll go on a high
Thanks to the Sarge, he's such a nice guy.
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Calista and Morbius the couple who share
Their innermost thoughts and don't seem to care
That people are listening to them most of the time
And try to ignore the more personal lines
We must ask the question about being prudent
But maybe it's cos one of them's a student
The other is also a wonderful mother
But don't you ever talk to each other?
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Rocky, oh Rocky Horror,
Dared to show us his bum,
It brought the ladies flocking,
From miles around they come,
His avatar changes by the day,
You never know what’s next,
It could be stockings and suspenders,
But his pussy cat is best!!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
ClarenSteve, a couple who are very much a pair
Eyes only for each other, but sometimes like to share
With other couples only, and no single guys
Swinging is to show their love, and not for prying eyes
Except of course their website, where they've got their pics on view
Where we see all the things that they really like to do
So check their ads and email, to book a time to meet
But no one liners wanted or they'll just get delete!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Busty is quite Lusty,
In fact she can be quite a tart,
In giving me these tasks,
She’s perfected quite an art,
I think it is her calling,
It’s keeping her amused,
Trying to give me a mauling,
But I’ll win, I’ll never lose!!!!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
And let's not forget the others who brighten up our day
They make us laugh and chuckle in many different ways
There's Easy, Gilbert, Melons and tallnhairy guy
And a very special mention to our very own Ice Pie
We can't forget VickyUK with the very lovely bottom
And all the other bums on here whose names are not forgotten
So while you're browsing forums and are looking for a lark
Let's have a laugh together and be thankful there was Mark!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
I think that matches all the require criteria, subject to an unknown rule change! :shock:
However, even if it doesn't pass muster, in stands pretty well on its' own!!
Honest Mal
2/10?
No? Excellent!!! Now I can sneek in, publish and be damned!!
Tales From Swinging Heaven
Whingers, Morons, moaners and whiners
They brighten our day with their posts and one liners
In the chat room they tell the mods they know the rules
But don't listen when told that they are just fools
Then they come in the forum and tell all the rest
But usually get told that to leave would be best
But without them we wouldn't have so much fun
And our days would be duller and much more humdrum
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
They all love Mal, they thinks he's just a mod
But those of them in the know recognise he's a God
Well_Busty_Babe has set him this task
But when Mal needed help he just had to ask
The guys rallied round, and wrote a verse or two
And showed Busty Babe just what they could do
The guys know that when you want a good pal
There's none better than good Honest Mal
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
The lady we all know and love, little Venus
Who seems very obsessed by a thing called the penis
The kids take up space and are under her feet
And she finds it a pain when arranging a meet.
Her photos are gorgeous although a bit blurry
And not easy to tell if she's short haired or furry
But Venus remember you've heard people say
A Mars a day keeps the doctor away!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
One speaks with wisdom, and I think you'll all see
That the guy we all listen to, is JudyTV
His posts are always full of good solid thought
And we read with intent and know we've been taught
To accept men we see in dresses and skirts
That maybe they're different and terrible flirts
But on here we're open minded and have to agree
That the world would be worse without JudyTV
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
The Facilitator is fairly new to the scene
But he's settling in well and seems very keen
When you see him in the forum he'd welcome a wave
And is looking for help on how to behave
But what's in a name LC says Borg off the telly
And Phil_osopher, a type of KY jelly
But Fac is a teacher and with furrowed brow
Answers the questions of what, where and how.
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Mark, Oh Mark, the man at the top
When he says jump, he doesn't mean hop
When you get things wrong he will give you a fright
By sending a message to 'please put it right'
He is very fair though and doesn't like fools
Who totally ignore the well written rules
So next time your post is taking a knock
Beware bossman Mark, 'cos he'll give it the lock!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
One of our favourites is beautiful Vix
She looks bloody gorgeous in those wonderful pics
They've been seen for a while by the bikers of Britain
And the members of SH are totally smitten
She lives very quietly in the land of the Tor
And the locals cannot believe what they saw
When they opened the Sport and spotted the piece
And joined in the chorus 'You lucky sod Reese'
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
And then there's the Sarge, who's always a laugh
His posts are so witty, and sometimes so naff
Don't know where he gets those wonderful gifs
But maybe they started as jpegs or tiffs
His post about planning for a terrorist attack
Made us all think about covering our back
If we do get attacked then we'll go on a high
Thanks to the Sarge, he's such a nice guy.
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Calista and Morbius the couple who share
Their innermost thoughts and don't seem to care
That people are listening to them most of the time
And try to ignore the more personal lines
We must ask the question about being prudent
But maybe it's cos one of them's a student
The other is also a wonderful mother
But don't you ever talk to each other?
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Rocky, oh Rocky Horror,
Dared to show us his bum,
It brought the ladies flocking,
From miles around they come,
His avatar changes by the day,
You never know what’s next,
It could be stockings and suspenders,
But his pussy cat is best!!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
ClarenSteve, a couple who are very much a pair
Eyes only for each other, but sometimes like to share
With other couples only, and no single guys
Swinging is to show their love, and not for prying eyes
Except of course their website, where they've got their pics on view
Where we see all the things that they really like to do
So check their ads and email, to book a time to meet
But no one liners wanted or they'll just get delete!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
Busty is quite Lusty,
In fact she can be quite a tart,
In giving me these tasks,
She’s perfected quite an art,
I think it is her calling,
It’s keeping her amused,
Trying to give me a mauling,
But I’ll win, I’ll never lose!!!!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
And let's not forget the others who brighten up our day
They make us laugh and chuckle in many different ways
There's Easy, Gilbert, Melons and tallnhairy guy
And a very special mention to our very own Ice Pie
We can't forget VickyUK with the very lovely bottom
And all the other bums on here whose names are not forgotten
So while you're browsing forums and are looking for a lark
Let's have a laugh together and be thankful there was Mark!
Chorus
We love swinging heaven, we love all the moddys
And we perv when we see all the beautiful bodies
Some say it's a type of massed affliction
But we all know it's just a crazy addiction
I think that matches all the require criteria, subject to an unknown rule change! :shock:
However, even if it doesn't pass muster, in stands pretty well on its' own!!
Honest Mal
2/10?
Sex God
Excellent mate, very good. :cheers:
What's the odds that WBB doesn't show up until about 5 o'clock tonight to set you your next task to be completed before the end of the night?
What's the odds that WBB doesn't show up until about 5 o'clock tonight to set you your next task to be completed before the end of the night?
Sex God
Truly a masterpiece....
Now,go and write the tune!
Now,go and write the tune!
Sex God
Surely a song is not a song unless it has a tune? Otheriwse it is merely a poem. I'm on your side, Mal - honest! :wink: :wink: I'm just trying to be helpful! :mrgreen: Surely if WBB wanted as poem she would have asked for one........ maybe one of her rules was that a tune must be included.......
Just a thought......... :shock:
:wink: :wink: I'm just trying to be helpful! :mrgreen: Surely if WBB wanted as poem she would have asked for one........ maybe one of her rules was that a tune must be included.......Just a thought......... :shock:
Sex God
Mal-Rap..... yeah, I like it 8-) 8-)
8-) 8-) Quote by bluexxx
Surely a song is not a song unless it has a tune? Otheriwse it is merely a poem. I'm on your side, Mal - honest!
Just a thought......... :shock:
on my side? Hmmm! Anyway, it's a song, and a tune is a tune which accompanies a song to make it musical. That's why they have musical partnerships, ie Lennon and McCartney, Elton John and Bernie Taupin, Rogers and Hammerstein to name a few. They are all nearly up to my standard, but don't compose under such scrutinies and pressures!!!! :shock:
Honest Mal
:wink:
Sex God
I think your best bet, just in case she expected a tune, is to say that it's rap - then there doesn't have to be a tune . Otherwise you could just say that it's sung with the tune of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, or something like that :haha:
. Otherwise you could just say that it's sung with the tune of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, or something like that :haha: 